Developmental milestones

jwebb0512

Our pedi does the ASQ developmental screener at the 9 month appointment. I just found a copy and read through it, trying to evaluate and see how DS would score (I know, I know...hubby already told me I'm too paranoid).

nanabanana06

Honestly, they don't matter. Babies hit things when they want to. If there was any delay your pedi would bring it up. I never bothered even remembering them. Most of them are silly cuz we don't have that toy in question or have never tried.

jwebb0512

Blah, so somehow TB chopped off everything I typed after that last sentence. ( Anyway, DS turned 8 months on the 29th. He does have a raking grasp, but doesn't have pincer grasp. He gets on all fours and rocks, but doesn't crawl. He makes a few consonant (b,g,m, and d)and vowel sounds and just started saying dada, but mostly he just squeals, screams, and vowels seem to be dominant. He babbles all the time. So, my question, have your LOs reached these milestones? I'm 99% certain I'm being paranoid, but I'm a SAHM and I know that my crazy, overbearing in-laws will place all blame on me and make me feel like a failure if anything were to ever be 'wrong' with DS. Especially since I'm a former teacher, they put so much pressure on. Needless to say, I get so nervous about milestones and doctor appointments. Thanks for humoring me and reading this, ladies!

nanabanana06

Stop worrying about milestones. Just stop. Your going off the deep end. Babies develop at their own pace. Period. Some babies crawl at 6 month, others crawl at 12. Some babies talk at 11 months other don't until later. Same with walking. They will learn these things. Those tests are not needed. Your child isn't being examined like he's about to enter Harvard. There is no pass or fail to this. Some babies just develop gross motor skills before talking, some vice versa. Just chill and enjoy the baby.

AimeeL85

My DD is one day older than yours and I think your DD sounds perfectly normal.  Our pedi doesn't do whatever that screening is (I'm guessing it asks if they can do x, y, z).

I really learned after my first LO to not worry about when they will do things, unless there seems to be a significant delay.  I had so much anxiety over the fact that my DS still hadn't rolled over at 3, 4 5 months...he didn't do it until he was 6 months (and the other direction until 7 months!).  I thought for sure he wouldn't hit his other milestones on time, but he did. He sat up, crawled, and walked all at average times.  He was and is completely normal!

DCKate

Ugh, ILs are the worst. Trust me, I speak from experience.

All babies do things at their own pace. Sounds like you're a wonderful, loving and engaged mama. Your LO can't ask for much more than that!

kjsmith9

It sounds like your LO is just fine - no worries

I will say though, as a pediatric physical therapist, that there ARE reasons and good uses for these types of questionnaires/assessments.  I know PP said the doctor will tell you if something is wrong, but there's no way for him to look at ALL of the different ares on the ASQ (or any other test) in a single well visit.  He can only help if he knows what you're observing at home.  Even if your LO was "below average" on an ASQ, it doesn't necessarily mean he's delayed... But at least it tells the doctor that maybe he should have an extra well visit in a few weeks, or they will keep a closer eye on him as he continues to develop.

Cellis

Nana_Osaki06 said:

Stop worrying about milestones. Just stop. Your going off the deep end. Babies develop at their own pace. Period. Some babies crawl at 6 month, others crawl at 12. Some babies talk at 11 months other don't until later. Same with walking. They will learn these things. Those tests are not needed. Your child isn't being examined like he's about to enter Harvard. There is no pass or fail to this. Some babies just develop gross motor skills before talking, some vice versa. Just chill and enjoy the baby.

All of this. I definitely understand though. I'm a former teacher and SAHM as well so I feel like I'm not doing something right if DS doesn't hit those milestones. He wasn't doing even half of the things on that list, but like others have already said each baby gets there in their own time.

ebp913

Nana_Osaki06 said:

Stop worrying about milestones. Just stop. Your going off the deep end. Babies develop at their own pace. Period. Some babies crawl at 6 month, others crawl at 12. Some babies talk at 11 months other don't until later. Same with walking. They will learn these things. Those tests are not needed. Your child isn't being examined like he's about to enter Harvard. There is no pass or fail to this. Some babies just develop gross motor skills before talking, some vice versa. Just chill and enjoy the baby.

This.  When your kid starts kindergarten no one is going to know who said dada first and who walked first.  And when he's 20, it really won't matter.  

ebp913

And also I would put your foot down with in laws right now.  Tell them they need to back off their over concern for your child.  Right now, he's fine because he doesn't know it's going on but when he gets older and he knows they are constantly watching him and pressuring him, he's not going to be very happy.  I would put an end to that immediately.