Finally starting to feel a little bit better...

salsy2012

3 weeks ago, we lost our little one due to my body going into labor, which caused my gestational sac to come down through the cervix. 

I just wanted to tell you all that I really appreciate all of your thoughts and prayers! It's been a very rough 3 weeks, but we're finally starting to get back a sense of "normalcy" in our lives. We miss our baby so deeply, but I think maybe we're starting to come to terms. I know what really helped us was that the OB department where we lost our little one, did some hand and foot molds for us. We never got to see our darling because the D&C wasn't very gentle on her and we were strongly advised against it, but seriously you guys...her little hands and feet were PERFECT.

 It gave me this relieved sense that everything was going to be alright when we saw the molds. I love them, as strange as that may seem. I know that if I had never lost a baby, the thought of having molds done would have seemed weird to me. But what a comfort they are to have. They also gave us this beautiful wooden chest to keep them in. It also came with a tiny crotchet blanket, diaper and mini teddy bear that a volunteer made. They are beautiful. I keep them all together in the chest with the baby book I started for her, in what would have been her room. I'm not ready to move them to the top shelf of my closet yet. I know that's where they'll need to go eventually, But for now, it's still hers.  

My husband and I are still grieving...but we've managed to stop being mad at each other (we took it out on each other for the first couple weeks), and focus our sadness into healthier outlets. I've gone back to work, and that really helps distract me. Sometimes when I'm feeling really blue, I write down my feelings in a letter to her and put it in that beautiful wood chest in her room. It makes me feel better to write. 

I hope that anyone here that is struggling with their grief can start to get to a better place with it. It's so hard, I know. I'm still dealing, but it really feels good to get back to life. My life was on pause for almost a month, and it wasn't doing anything to help my outlook on life. 

I don't know you ladies, but I love you all. I'm so grateful to have this support system. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. 

shandorfml2

Lots of hugs. Glad you are doing better. Love the hand and foot molds..that was so nice of them!

princezjk

Your molds sound beautiful, what an awesome keepsake.  Glad you are feeling better.  (((hugs)))

OSUWifey09

***SIGGY WARNING***



My most precious possession from Devon's short life is the footprint that we got from the hospital. It's proof that he was here, he was real, and that he'll always be a part of our lives. I love that the hospital gave you those precious keepsakes.

So glad the days are getting better. We all know that recovering and grieving for your child is probably one of the hardest things we'll ever go through, so it's great to have a support system to turn to. *hugs*

Noethola

Having physical reminders of our little ones is so very sweet when we are able to get it done. The molds sound like wonderful momentos. I am so glad they were able to do that for you, along with the box from a volunteer. 

christie212

My loss was about 3 weeks ago too.  I am so sorry for your loss.