Um Lauren, haven't you heard of "sacrifice"??!- I'm looking on Ebay for a horse and buggy for B to get to work now so we can get rid of our second car. I'm not sure you're allowed to ride a horse on the Garden State Parkway, but I can't be stranded at home with a baby and no car. My name isn't Heaven Leigh.
i've "heard" of it somewhere, but obviously i don't know much about it as i work and grace is in daycare. i should look it up sometime.
i'll hop in my lexus with my LV sunglasses and go to barnes & noble for a latte and buy a dictionary. while my daughter is at daycare, of course, because i really don't want to spend any time with her.
proof that i make babies. jack, grace, and ben, in no particular order
I was really disheartened to read the statement that was made about how women should not have children if they have to work full time and can only see their child 3 hours a day. Some families really do need two incomes to survive. Does that mean they aren't entitled to have children?
I agree. That's a completely ridiculous statement.
CougBride07:
sure its a blanket statement. I am talking
about a normal situation with a couple and kids. It is doable.
Obviously, life throws you curve balls. But in normal situations it is
doable. People just don't want to give stuff up and its sad.
Some of us actually like working. When I hated my job, I wanted nothing more than to be a SAHM. When I found a job I loved, I think it made me a better person and a better mother. I worked hard to have a career. I also work hard to be a good mom. The two aren't mutually exclusive.
Annalise Marie 05.29.06
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
Wow some of you ladies are judgemental. I ended up being a SAHM after getting laid off and will probably be going back to work after the birth of my second child.
I'm lucky to be getting u/c right now. When it runs out, I don't know what will happen. Not all families with working moms work to afford a lexus, no matter what you want to think. They are trying to feed their families and keep bills paid. I don't know what world you live in, but many people had major setbacks financially, medically, got pregnant and didn't expect it.
Not all of us were all financially put together before starting a family. And not forgetting to add that many moms worked hard at jobs and education before starting a family and find it to be a good fit for their lives. That nurse that took care of you in L&D probably was a mom herself.
It's SAHM's like yourself that give the outside world the negative outlook on SAHM's.
Staying at home with your child doesn't guarantee that your raising the perfect child or one more adjusted tendancies.
I find your holier than thou comments really awful and judgemental. Consider yourself lucky that you have the ability to stay at home and pray that you don't suffer a setback that forces you out of that role.
I honestly don't care whether other moms work or SAH. But I can tell you my 4yr old was basically isolated & at home from birth until 3yrs old & is the most outgoing, social, independent child I've ever come across. Her teachers (she was in MDO, then 2 preschools) & other Mother's say the same thing. I have an almost 2yr old that was much more socialized earlier & is much more shy & insecure. Same SAHM but two totally different personalities. I am totally convinced the vast majority of your child's personality was there at birth...so I consider the whole argument silly. Some kids are shy, some outgoing, some a combo of the 2--if you want to know what kind you might have, I'd look at yourself & DH as kids & i'd guess it'd be a much better indicator than if they go to daycare or not--LOL!
AKA Carol*Brady! IHO my upcoming 10yr Nestiversary--Back to old screenname. My own Marsha, Jan & Cindy...
Designing a Life Blog
First of all there is no reason to use fowl language, or belittle anyone.
Since when did chickens have anything to do with it?
edukashun is awesome.
Again uncalled for.
I have one little typo and you assume I'm un-educated? How dare you! Again, you have no idea who I am and all you're doing is continuing this disgusting cycle of making people feel like sh*t who have opinions different than yours.
If you must know, I have a Bachelor's Degree and work full-time as a Television Director. I'm pretty damn educated.
I am totally convinced the vast majority of your child's personality was there at birth...so I consider the whole argument silly. Some kids are shy, some outgoing, some a combo of the 2--if you want to know what kind you might have, I'd look at yourself & DH as kids & i'd guess it'd be a much better indicator than if they go to daycare or not--LOL!
Beating a dead horse, I know, but this is a great statement. I know many kids who have been in daycare and are still painfully shy, and many kids with SAHMs who are outgoing and independent. My DD (9 months) is definitely showing signs of being outgoing and independent, despite no daycare. We do other things for socialization (play groups, library storytime, play with cousins, etc.)
Ok, wow do I dare comment on here? I was raised by my mom a single parent of 2. She worked her ass off b/c she had too, but even if she could have stayed with us she would have choose work. She often says to me I do not know how you do it. She feels I have lost myself, and all I am now is a mom. I completley being a stay at home mom of 2 soon 3 kids understand why she would want to work. I love being home with kids and I'm glad I have the option, but some days I miss working and who I was before. In the end we are all just mom's trying to do the best we can for our kids. Does anyone really know the answer to what is better? No we can only try like hell to raise them right.
This post was in response to another saying that babies/kids who go to daycare are better socialized than kids who SAH. The girl being called out (CougsBride or omething) said she'd rather SAH than send her baby to daycare merely for socialization.
I understand that SAH is not for everyone and not a viable option for everyone, but why is it ok to bash SAHM and their children, saying they will be less equipped to handle kindergarten? Whenever anyone makes a smidgen of a negative comment about a kid going to daycare, working moms generally freak! What is the deal!? Ugh
it is not ok to bash moms period, whether they be SAHM or Working. Out society has changed. Women are catty and judgmental sometimes. We are our own worst enemies. What works for some will not or may not work for others. It's sad that people are bashing others though. I know that my personal wants are more 50's era in mind but I also know that it is not possible to live where I live and only have one income coming in with a family, house and two cars.
Part of the problem is that you end up with selfish women on both sides - there are women who stay home because they see it as a way out of having to work and there are women who go back to work because they'd rather be there than with their child full time.?
And then there's everyone else, which I'd like to say is most of us, who've picked what we thought was best for us and our family. ?
Whenever anyone makes a smidgen of a negative comment about a kid going to daycare, working moms generally freak! What is the deal!? Ugh
Actually, lets be honest here, shall we? Whenever someone make a smidgen of a negative comment about daycare kids, working moms generally freak. However, the opposite is also true. Whenever someone makes a smidgen of a negative comment about SAH kids, SAH moms generally freak. It goes both ways. Always has, always will.
Look - we all do what we gotta do. The truth is, moms are screwed either way by society and other moms in general to feel guilty about the decisions they make when it comes to parenting. Some moms make themselves feel better by putting others down so that they can make themselves feel superior to others.
I don't have to agree with the decisions you make as a parent and raise my kid the same way. I can think your kids name is silly and I can think that throwing a 1st birthday party with 100 people is way beyond excessive. And I can think that being SAHM would drive me out of my mind. But that doesn't mean that I don't think you can't do any of those things. That doesn't mean you're less of a parent. It's what works for you and that's OK. We're allowed to have different opinions while still supporting each other.
I would LOVE to be a SAHM, unfortunately I can't, my mom will have my child from 9am-3pm every day. I am glad its my mom and not someone else. I am hoping by next year I can be a SAHM. But, my friend Gena has a baby who she picks up at 4:30 everyday and puts to bed at 6:30. It makes me so sad. I have nothing against SAHM or mom's who work. I just hope that everyone gets to spend time w/their kids because they are such a blessing. My DH's exwife sees her kids like 1-2 hours a day 3 days a week. She is such a loser!
I just hope that everyone with little girls in their signatures realize that your daughter will have to make the same choice someday. I hope you support her no matter what.
If you have a little boy, I hope he is raised to know there's more to being a dad than bringing home the bacon.
Thanks, glad to know I am a dirt bag for providing my family with health bennies. Makes me feel awesome!
I really hope your husband loses his job and you lose everything and then maybe you'll have to get a freaking job. Then you may not be so judgemental.
Yup I said it - flame me if you will, however judgemental people generally only learn to not be judgemental when they are thrown into situations they always judge against.
Re: This makes me kind of annoyed.
Um Lauren, haven't you heard of "sacrifice"??!- I'm looking on Ebay for a horse and buggy for B to get to work now so we can get rid of our second car. I'm not sure you're allowed to ride a horse on the Garden State Parkway, but I can't be stranded at home with a baby and no car. My name isn't Heaven Leigh.
i've "heard" of it somewhere, but obviously i don't know much about it as i work and grace is in daycare. i should look it up sometime.
i'll hop in my lexus with my LV sunglasses and go to barnes & noble for a latte and buy a dictionary. while my daughter is at daycare, of course, because i really don't want to spend any time with her.
I agree. That's a completely ridiculous statement.
Some of us actually like working. When I hated my job, I wanted nothing more than to be a SAHM. When I found a job I loved, I think it made me a better person and a better mother. I worked hard to have a career. I also work hard to be a good mom. The two aren't mutually exclusive.
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
Since when did chickens have anything to do with it?
edukashun is awesome.
You made my day with the VC Andrews references! Hilarious, I loved those twisted books in high school.
Wow some of you ladies are judgemental. I ended up being a SAHM after getting laid off and will probably be going back to work after the birth of my second child.
I'm lucky to be getting u/c right now. When it runs out, I don't know what will happen. Not all families with working moms work to afford a lexus, no matter what you want to think. They are trying to feed their families and keep bills paid. I don't know what world you live in, but many people had major setbacks financially, medically, got pregnant and didn't expect it.
Not all of us were all financially put together before starting a family. And not forgetting to add that many moms worked hard at jobs and education before starting a family and find it to be a good fit for their lives. That nurse that took care of you in L&D probably was a mom herself.
It's SAHM's like yourself that give the outside world the negative outlook on SAHM's.
Staying at home with your child doesn't guarantee that your raising the perfect child or one more adjusted tendancies.
I find your holier than thou comments really awful and judgemental. Consider yourself lucky that you have the ability to stay at home and pray that you don't suffer a setback that forces you out of that role.
Again uncalled for.
I have one little typo and you assume I'm un-educated? How dare you! Again, you have no idea who I am and all you're doing is continuing this disgusting cycle of making people feel like sh*t who have opinions different than yours.
If you must know, I have a Bachelor's Degree and work full-time as a Television Director. I'm pretty damn educated.
uh, I accidentally double posted and the board won't let me delete it. That's annoying. Sorry.
Beating a dead horse, I know, but this is a great statement. I know many kids who have been in daycare and are still painfully shy, and many kids with SAHMs who are outgoing and independent. My DD (9 months) is definitely showing signs of being outgoing and independent, despite no daycare. We do other things for socialization (play groups, library storytime, play with cousins, etc.)
it is not ok to bash moms period, whether they be SAHM or Working. Out society has changed. Women are catty and judgmental sometimes. We are our own worst enemies. What works for some will not or may not work for others. It's sad that people are bashing others though. I know that my personal wants are more 50's era in mind but I also know that it is not possible to live where I live and only have one income coming in with a family, house and two cars.
Part of the problem is that you end up with selfish women on both sides - there are women who stay home because they see it as a way out of having to work and there are women who go back to work because they'd rather be there than with their child full time.?
And then there's everyone else, which I'd like to say is most of us, who've picked what we thought was best for us and our family. ?
Actually, lets be honest here, shall we? Whenever someone make a smidgen of a negative comment about daycare kids, working moms generally freak. However, the opposite is also true. Whenever someone makes a smidgen of a negative comment about SAH kids, SAH moms generally freak. It goes both ways. Always has, always will.
Look - we all do what we gotta do. The truth is, moms are screwed either way by society and other moms in general to feel guilty about the decisions they make when it comes to parenting. Some moms make themselves feel better by putting others down so that they can make themselves feel superior to others.
I don't have to agree with the decisions you make as a parent and raise my kid the same way. I can think your kids name is silly and I can think that throwing a 1st birthday party with 100 people is way beyond excessive. And I can think that being SAHM would drive me out of my mind. But that doesn't mean that I don't think you can't do any of those things. That doesn't mean you're less of a parent. It's what works for you and that's OK. We're allowed to have different opinions while still supporting each other.
I just hope that everyone with little girls in their signatures realize that your daughter will have to make the same choice someday. I hope you support her no matter what.
If you have a little boy, I hope he is raised to know there's more to being a dad than bringing home the bacon.
Thanks, glad to know I am a dirt bag for providing my family with health bennies. Makes me feel awesome!
I really hope your husband loses his job and you lose everything and then maybe you'll have to get a freaking job. Then you may not be so judgemental.
Yup I said it - flame me if you will, however judgemental people generally only learn to not be judgemental when they are thrown into situations they always judge against.