How do you know your done?

sarahns80

Most days I'm exhausted with 2 and I always said I wanted 2 but I just can't stop thinking about having another baby. My husband says its up to me and I just don't know. Part of me thinks I have a girl and a boy and I am so thankful for them and the other part of me loves babies and wants more! I'm a SAHM so more daycare cost isn't an issue, we have a 4th bedroom and would just need a new car that can hold 3 car seats. I can't make up my mind! How did you know you were done?

ChelsiAnn13

I would say if your still on the fence then you can't say you are done, unless finances or something were an issue. I would just keep an open mind and continue as things are. It may just happen or you may decide for sure that you want a third after giving yourself some time to think/ have the perfect time arise.

I am on the same boat. We have such a perfect daughter and it wouldn't be the end of the world to be one and done, we originally thought we would be. But I have been thinking about having one maybe two more down the road. And while I have babies on the brain I decided to go back to school for a double major so it will have to be around 7-10 years from now. I am so sad about this but I know going back to school is what is best for our family. We are also young, early twenties, so we have time.

Ah sorry this turned into a bit if a vent, I am dealing with what needs to be done versus seeing everyone I know going on their second and even third child. All the squishiness!!

luvmyducks

We were on the fence about having more than 2 for a while but I've decided in the last week we will try for one more in a couple of years. I just didn't feel done. Like I don't feel like giving any clothes away, or thinking about long-term birth control...I just don't feel like we are complete yet.

memali26

I always wanted 3 or 4 kids, DH wanted 2 for sure and was open to considering a third. After DD2 was born, we were seriously considering stopping at 2. I still felt like I wanted another, though. I would picture our future as a family and just felt like someone was missing, like there was supposed to be one more. I couldn't bring myself to part with any of the baby stuff, I found myself thinking about names and how life would go with 3 kids. DH knew all of that, but he just wasn't sure he was ready/willing to say "yes let's have another." I was trying hard to respect that and accept that we were probably done at 2 when, surprise! We have an unplanned #3 on the way. It certainly wasn't our plan or how we thought things would go, but we're very happy about it. It was easier to have the decision suddenly made for us

If you're on the fence and DH could go either way, I'd give yourself a little more time. When you're going about your day-to-day stuff, think about how a third would fit in to that. If it feels right to you, then it might be.  

sschwege

I want like six kids, DH says we are stopping at three, so take my advice for what it's worth.  But I've seen too many people later in life regret not having more.  My mother, MIL, 2 Aunts, one of my midwives all said they should have had 'one more'. If I was on the fence I would have another.  The way I look at it I would never regret having another, but I might regret not having another.  

ladylisalt

I have 1 and know I want 1 more. I don't want an only child but if thats how it has to be I will be happy with that also. My DH is fine with 2 also. Money and family support would be our reason for not having more and also energy and time. I think its so much work with 1. I am also closer to 40 so age does play a factor. I know some ppl say they want many kids. I think those people have a certain mindset and can probably handle it. My opinion is that things are just so expensive nowadays and unless you have endless amounts of money, the more kids you have the less you will be able to do. I could be wrong though. My husband is from a family of 6 and the kids did not have many experiences or get to do much due to lack of finances. If you are financially and mentally comfortable with the idea and have support maybe keep your options open.

MommyKayla11

I knew I was done pretty much before I had DS. DH only wanted one so that's what we agreed to. I'm enjoying my job and not having the stress of more than one child.

laurakaz13

I think you just have a feeling that you are done or not.  I was one and done for a long time, but now I feel like I'm on the fence and may have one more.  DH and I would never have more than that. 

We value things like travel, private school and early retirement and with all that 2 is all we can afford, to live the life we want. 

cpmich

I always thought I would have a lot of kids, but with DS I think we are one and done. Our family feels complete. Full stop. I had a great pregnancy with him, he has been a relatively easy baby, DH and I both grew up with siblings, I have no doubt we could love another... But we are happy as a family and are complete. Sometimes you just know.