My doula called me (at 32 weeks) to ask if she could bring an "assistant" to shadow her during my birth. I really do not feel comfortable having another person in the delivery room other than my husband and the doula we hired. Would you say no? Also, she has asked if the assistant can come to our second prenatal visit and our post-natal visit. But again, I'd rather not...Am I being unreasonable?
Re: Doula question - should I allow a shadow?
FYI if you are giving birth in a hospital there will be lots more people coming in and out of the room besides just your husband and doula anyways. You loose your modesty quickly. I swear everyone from the LC to the photographer to the blood draw tech to the food service guy saw my boob while I was learning to BF and I didn't care a bit.
BFP: 07/14/2014, EDD: 03/04/2015
But if you already know you're not feeling comfortable with her at the birth (and it sounds like that's the case), just say no. You can just say it's important to you to keep things low-key and you want to limit the number of people.
I've been on the other end of that scenario as the student, and trust me, she'll know it's nothing personal. That's part of being a doula - respecting women's wishes for their births. She won't be offended.