Baby Names
Margotsha
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Let's talk about last names...
Margotsha
member
in Baby Names
So I married into a hyphenated last name (my husbands since he was like 6, not ours combined). So what is the legal rule on naming your child? Even though it's our name and we're proud, both of us know that it's a real big pain in the bum to have a hyphenated last name that's like 15 letters long. We were thinking of 3 options (and for this example, we'll pretend that my last name if Smitty-Jones):
First name, middle name, Smitty-Jones
First name, middle name, Smitty
First name, Jones (as middle name), Smitty
Can you legally give your child a different last name than you have? If so, what are your thoughts on the above?
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Re: Let's talk about last names...
I personally would want my children to have the same last name as me so that you don't run into unnecessary issues when say, leaving the country, having a medical emergency, etc., And because I like the idea of the whole family being united with one name.
So either, you like your last name (which it sounds like you do), so you deal with the length of it and give it to your child.
Or if I were in your shoes and didn't like the name, I would have had DH change it when we got married so that we were just "Jones." Who knows what the legal process would be to do that now.
Just my 2 cents. You have to do what feels right for you.
BFP #1 mm/c at 12w1d
This is how I would feel too.
ETA: Oops. Meant to quote this:
I would say that no matter what name you choose, everyone in the family has it. So either give the kid your full last name or both you and DH should shorten it to match.
DH and I both hyphenated but our hypothetical future children are going to take my maiden name.
DH and I wanted the same last name and we wanted to share a family name and for any kids to have my last name so that's how it is going to work out.
Same here. And I travel internationally with my children all the time since they were infants, it's never a problem.
Emma Kate - born 10.16.03 @ 29 weeks, weighed 1lb 13oz and 13.5" long.
TTC #3
This. I'd just keep the hyphenated LN.
In your case I would just give the kid your same last name, hyphenated and all.
legally you can chose whatever last name you want.
I kept my madien name when I got married and DH kept his and our kids have our last names hyphenated. Legally they have a hyphenated name but informally they go by just the first part (my last name, only because its a better name). I fully expect the kids to drop one or both names when married. This baby is a boy, and if he marries a traditional girl I expect that they'll do whatever suits them but I would assume they would chose one of the two and not both hyphenate. My hope though is that all of the kids will keep one part of their current hyphen and hyphenate their name with their spouses- I hate the tradition of automatically taking the male spouses last name.
I agree with this.
I have a male friend who has a hypenated name that he shares with his parents. I don't think he suffers from it and I am sure that he would use it for his children if his future wife didn't care.
So I would say, if you plan to keep your name hyphenated, then give it to the baby as well. If you really think it is a burden, then I would consider shortening everyone's name. While I don't think that everyone needs to have the same name, I do think it makes sense to give the child the last name of at least someone in the family. But that is just my preference. Legally, I don't think it matters.
I do not share a last name with my DH or my children it is not a big deal to me.
I've had several patients come in where the mother has a hyphenated name and the children have one of those names or some completely different last name (I suppose to match their biological father's last name). In all honesty, the different last names have never caused a problem or made me think differently It is more of a problem when the parents can't remember their child's date of birth.
I'd see no problem with you both keeping the hyphenated name and then naming your child with just one of those names (without using the middle name slot for the second name).
T 2.12 | W 5.14
This.