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What they didn't tell you

mrswynn2014mrswynn2014 member
edited May 2015 in May 2015 Moms
we have all received so much (unwanted) advise during our pregnancies! You would think that we wouldn't be surprised by anything at this point. I thought it might be fun to discuss what surprised you during your pregnancy, labor, and or bringing home your new born.
I didn't realize how much you bled after having a baby. People told me that I would bleed, but I didn't realize that it was for weeks! Also the blood clots surprised me.
Nobody told me that I would lose my memory when I got pregnant. I mean I had heard of "pregnancy brain" but oh goodness! Even still if I don't write something down, it is out of my memory forever. It made work a lot harder, and even driving is more difficult. It makes me feel so stupid!
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Re: What they didn't tell you

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    morgansWed105148morgansWed105148 member
    Stingy nipples when they get too full!!Leaky boobs that make you feel messy!!
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    danibonellodanibonello member
    sarahm+jnyay said:

    Yes!!! No one says ANYTHING about how much it hurts after! I went to stand up and thought I was going to die! And the swelling that is everywhere. My lady parts got like 4 times the size. I can barely walk because of stitches and hemroids :((


    Yes! Swollen lady parts! Even with my c section... I couldn't believe the swelling! I suppose it could be in part due to the fact that a doctor went dang near elbow deep during surgery to push baby back up and out of my pelvis. Sheesh! There's a pressure you don't soon forget!!
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    mars8kmars8k member
    No one told me about after baby constipation! And how big a problem stitches are. And no one told me babies almost always have digestion problems!
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    mrswynn2014mrswynn2014 member
    chambersbaby2015 said:

    Nobody told me about the pain AFTER birth. Everyone talks about how childbirth is the most painful thing you'll ever go through. And I'm not questioning it. But I've already blocked out/forgotten that pain. Now I have new pain that I can't block out because it's constant.

    And no one told me how awkward going to the bathroom would be afterwards. Anxiety for bowel movements and just having to change how you normally go to the bathroom. People should really prepare you for that...

    I'm so afraid to use the bathroom it's not even funny! And my baby is 3weeks old!
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    nursej519nursej519 member
    edited June 2015
    ^^ I definitely wasn't constipated. I had diarrhea for over a week after labor!

    No one told me about the shaking after the baby was delivered. Or how my pelvic muscles would feel so weak still.. 4 weeks pp.

    Or that some women don't produce enough breast milk and some babies don't latch on..
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    mrswynn2014mrswynn2014 member
    Also no one told me you could have contractions for days! I thought you start having contractions, go to the hospital, then have a baby. I had contractions for 4days before it was time to deliver!
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    rklinge0rklinge0 member
    That you could feel the umbilical cord after delivery. It felt so awkward hanging out of me.
    Also the awful gas before the 1st poop. My dh thought it was the baby. I looked at him and said nope that would be.
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    toddabunnytoddabunny member
    I've forgotten the whole labour, the midwife washed me after and my SO apparently cut up and hand fed me and he likes to let everyone know, dignity just goes out the window, and the whole pain afterwards I wish I knew about this, have not functioned properly for 2 whole weeks. she's worth every minute of the pain but I'm so warning everyone about the after birth now lol
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    twodreamerstwodreamers member
    I had no idea I would feel like I couldn't breath once the spinal kicked in for my c-section. The dr told me, "you might feel like you can't breathe but as long as you can talk, you're getting enough oxygen." I was just like, "okay" - because I still felt fine. Fast forward 2 minutes and I start gasping, "I can't breathe!! I can't breathe!!" They kept assuring me I was fine but it felt like I had an elephant sitting on my chest.
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    blitzy23blitzy23 member
    That I would be more swollen after giving birth, than I was during pregnancy. And I second everything else that you all have said!
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    mrscimino914mrscimino914 member
    blitzy23 said:

    That I would be more swollen after giving birth, than I was during pregnancy. And I second everything else that you all have said!

    Oh yea my feet were so swollen after birth my husband kept calling me a hobbit lol
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    rositalynda2014rositalynda2014 member
    danibonello said:

    Minor, but super gross and awkward for me.... that once your water breaks, every contraction pushed out amniotic fluid. I felt like I was peeing the bed during my whole labor!

    Big thing though.... how PAINFULLLL the cesarean would be!!! The pain was so bad I passed out from it and didn't get to enjoy seeing my baby for the first time.

    Yes.! I had no idea your water leaked with every contraction either lol it was so weird.

    And my c section didn't hurt at all..? Were you not numb enough and did you let them know you were in pain..?

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    chavez2685chavez2685 member
    twodreamers said:

    I had no idea I would feel like I couldn't breath once the spinal kicked in for my c-section. The dr told me, "you might feel like you can't breathe but as long as you can talk, you're getting enough oxygen." I was just like, "okay" - because I still felt fine. Fast forward 2 minutes and I start gasping, "I can't breathe!! I can't breathe!!" They kept assuring me I was fine but it felt like I had an elephant sitting on my chest.

    I've had two epi's before and this baby was my third, but the first time it affected me this way. With in 15 mins of having it put in I could barely speak and breathe and my blood pressure dropped suddenly and very low. I barely got the call button pushed before I was out of it. So scary!
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    danibonellodanibonello member
    rositalynda2014 said:

    It wasn't like I could feel them cutting or anything... but it felt like they were grabbing my insides and twisting them... it's hard to describe. I did say that the pain was too much, but my husband later informed me that I was only whispering this sentiment when I thought I was yelling it!
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    prettileeprettilee member
    I knew about the bleeding postpartum, but I was not prepared for the pelvic pain. I know that I pushed a baby out of there, so I expected the pain and annoying itching from the stitches. The feeling that I was being shot inward with a cannonball every time I walked for more than 5 minutes was a shocker for me!
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    kremerj1kremerj1 member
    Ya'll are making me feel better about a lot of things, I'm 5 days pp. The circumsizen would be so painful for ds that it messed up bf. Bf would so painful, hormone crashes and that certain parts of my body like Brewers and butt would be bigger then pregnancy.
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    danibiidanibii member
    The gas pain. Holy crap the gas pain.
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    mamajama3mamajama3 member
    Pregnancy- The heartburn and pregnancy carpal tunnel were terrible! I didn't hear much about that until I experienced them. Also that I would snore and drool a lot more.
    Labor- I was so surprised that I didn't get to experience labor because I had to have a CS. I kept thinking my breech baby could and would flip (and that the version would work) and I was surprised she didn't. While I know labor is painful I kinda wish I knew what it felt like. I didn't really hear much about babies being breech and the possibility of having to have a CS until it happened to me.
    Going home- the hormones and crying the first week totally were more than I was expecting and I hadn't heard about it being like this. I'm feeling much better now but man were those some emotionally intense days!
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    saric83saric83 member
    danibonello said:
    It wasn't like I could feel them cutting or anything... but it felt like they were grabbing my insides and twisting them... it's hard to describe. I did say that the pain was too much, but my husband later informed me that I was only whispering this sentiment when I thought I was yelling it!

    Mine was like this too.  I was surprised at how brutal it was.  There was no pain but so much pressure and pulling.  I felt like I got lifted right off the table a few times.  I also threw up multiple times during the surgery and was so miserable.  It was an emergency one, so I guess I didn't think too much about how it could be, but I never would have thought that! 
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    katielyn1katielyn1 member
    STM here...I wasn't prepared for the pelvic pressure and pain I had for months during pregnancy this time. After my c sec I wasn't prepared for how sleepy the meds would make me. I could barely hold my son without falling asleep. I also didn't know the incision would STING so bad everytime I got up and I was staying pain meds on time. I was pleasantly surprised by how I didn't feel a thing during the c sec! I didn't even know thy had started. (Might've had something to do with my BP dropping and being very low) and I was happy I didn't bled near as bad as when I had my dd vaginally. (Bled for around 10 weeks with her)

    imageimageimage



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    mrswynn2014mrswynn2014 member
    I thought of some more.. The shaking during labor as pp said.
    And I knew my hands and feet would swell, but oh goodness! And I didn't know how much swollen feet could hurt!
    I agree with the loving my husband more! He was so great! He never left us while we were in the hospital. I kept telling him to go eat, and he didn't want to leave even though he was so hungry!
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    danibonellodanibonello member
    rinkeb said:

    Never realized I would have to ask about and then decide to have a c section 21 hours after my water broke and having pushed for two hours. I was swollen from my hips to my toes and didn't know it would take two weeks to go away. Also, no one told me I would need to be on stool softeners for awhile because going to the bathroom would become so painful. Oh and the emotional rollercoaster with lots of tears. I cried at target yesterday reading father's day cards which is not normal for me.

    On a positive note though, no one ever told me how much more I could possibly love my husband. He was amazingly supportive after the surgery. Didn't know he would need to help me put on those mesh underwear and pick up bloody pads I accidentally dropped.

    YESS!!! My husband has always been amazing, which was amplified during my pregnancy... holy cow though, nothing compares to how awesome our marriage has become since we became parents. One of the very first things he said to me after our daughter was born was that he didn't realize he could love me more than he already did. The connection we have now is unlike anything I could have imagined. I'm very thankful, as obviously many couples aren't as strong and end up letting their marriage get destroyed.
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