Mom in delivery room

Knottie94519490

I just wanted an opinion on whether or not your are having your mom and spouse in the delivery room. Why or why not?

Ababy19

Yes to both.  With  my first DS my MIL was in the room as well.  But she will be watching my little ones with this delivery. 

lawsonellis

Only my spouse. If my mom were living I'd have her in there too.

As to why- support and desire to share the experience with them?

mandi195

My mom was in the room when my son was born, I was a single mother and she was my support. She's so awesome.

This time it will be just my husband. I don't do well with hospitals, doctors, IVs, etc; so the less people I have around me during all of that will be better; both for me and the relationships with those close to me.

corysgirls

My mom passed away when I was young and my hubby's mom passed away in 08 so we have my sister, SIL, and my best friend along with my husband actually in the room. We make a party out of things so pretty much anyone is allowed while I'm laboring because it takes my mind off some of the crappier parts of labor. As soon as it's push time everyone but those few I mentioned are asked to go to the waiting room until LO arrives.

maryvh

Im only having my husband. Im really private about my body and I wouldnt be comfortable with anybody else in the room.

finallyourturn2

My husband for sure. Still undecided on my mom. I may let her just because my sister is a bitch to her for no reason, and also because she is 6 hours away and will miss a lot.

dreyes4

Both my mom and my husband. My mom was in the room with me on all 3 of my childerns births and moat deff. With this one. Yes at the age of 23 im still a big mommas girl. I love my husband to death but there is times that i just want to rip his head off...lol

MalVough

My mom, my sister, SO's mom and SO.

Why? Because I want my mommy? I didn't occur to me to not include her. But everyone's relationship with their mother is different.

LBeez13

Both my mom and husband were there for my first but this time my mom will probably have to watch my LO. It will most likely be just my husband and I for this one.

Also--I had my mom in there because we are super close.

corabrie

Just my husband. He's really the only person I'd be comfortable with.

Bostonchelle

Just my husband. My mom will be with my 2 year old. My mom also has a tendency to talk and talk and talk in situations such as labor- love her but that would drive me crazy!!!

Whitfry

My team consists of DH, my mom, my doula, possibly a second doula, and my OB. Plus the labor nurses my mom is hand selecting, lol.

I actually initially wanted my mom to do my delivery, but she wants to be there for me without the stress of being in charge. She will be my best advocate, though. She's already spoken to her favorite labor nurses, one of which has offered to come in and work whenever I go into labor, to guarantee we get the cream of the crop. And she recommended my OB who I adore. They get along really well so there won't be any weird tension or power plays.

My MIL is super religious, so I plan on giving her the "job" of praying/activating prayer chains when I go into labor. That way she can feel important and involved without being in the room.

Two of my closest friends are both doulas. One of them offered me her services. The other one lives in Canada and will be helping me post-partum. But if she ends up being in town, she'll be at the birth as well.

JennyP0222

My husband yes, my mom no. She and my dad would be allowed during labor but not during pushing/delivery. Me pushing my baby out of my body is not something I need an audience for. However - this time I need my parents to watch my son while I am in labor so they will probably not be at the hospital until after delivery anyway. 

Ladylec

Nope. No friggin way. My mom is annoying, makes things about her and is not very helpful in any situation. 

If you have the kind of mom that would make delivery better instead of worse, have her come. Personal preference. 

My hubs is absolutely amazing and was so incredible during delivery. 

mwerren

Mom and husband will be in the room...not my MIL tho-she stresses me the fuck out.

Mom because she's awesome and supports me like crazy emotionally, and someone has to catch my husband when he faints!

Boycrazymommy

I had DH, my mom, and my MIL in the delivery room for DS. It was a wonderful experience, but I think the decision should be an individual one. It depends on your personality and personal wishes and your relationship with your relatives. My DH is neither very doting and sympathetic or very good in medical situations, so I wanted my mom for support and her nursing experience. My MIL was a last minute decision - she came to visit during labor and was so supportive to both me and DH that I asked her to stay for the delivery. I wouldn't change anything about my choice; it was such a memorable, beautiful shared time together.

skatergrl

Just my husband. I love my mom and she would be wonderful but I want the experience to just be with my husband. I'm sure my mom will be there during labor but just not during delivery. Plus, I wouldn't want my MIL there so this way it's an easy - only husband and I decision.

DM718

Just my husband.  

Mum would probably love to be there (and my sister, father, & I think she may expect to be there), but I see zero benefit to having her there.  She loves me, and tries to be supportive, but she has an incredible way of making things more complicated.  

Anyways, my reasons include:

• Pushing a baby out of my vagina is not a show
• The medical professionals are there to make sure things go well
• My husband will be there for support
• My mother has a history of believing she knows what I need and letting me know she's not my maid / servant / whatever when I ask for help that I actually need (this is based on her attempts to "help" me after each of my two knee surgeries)
• My mother believes she's a doctor by osmosis (her father as well as several uncles and cousins are doctors).  She also believes she's smarter than nurses, and the doctors are out to make money at the expense of the well being of whomever she's concerned about.  This disturbing attitude is shared by several in my family.  
• Finally, if I let my mother come, I think that opens the door for other crazy family members to ask to come.  The sane ones respect that this is private and know that they'll be of more help watching my pets; the crazy ones think it's some weird bonding experience they should be included in.  And really, all the bonding needs to be between me, my husband, and the baby. 
  

WinningColors

Just my husband. My mom would drive me crazy.

ngolimento

I love my mom, but girl has an uncanny talent for saying the wrong things. She will be out of state anyway, so we don't have to have that convo.

djoliet

My fiancé and my Mom will be in the room with me.

When I had my son, I lived out if state and had no family around. I had 2 friends with me, my son's dad wasn't even there and I honestly felt like I was alone.

I'm so happy to be home now and have my fiancé and Mom as support systems.

ruemorgan

My husband will be there. Dont have a mom, so i cant really say if id want her there, but I can say im sure as hell not letting DHs mom in the delivery room!

ruemorgan

Am I the only one who read the title "mom in delivery room" like...."MARCH mom in delivery room. " I was freaking out, phewww. @-)

071115

I had both with my first. My mom really wanted to be there and I liked having her there.
We didn't with the second and won't with the 3rd... Just my husband

adoo

I have yet to discuss this with SO and we have yet to tour our hospital and ask all of these questions, but as of right now I think it will be SO and my dad.  My mom and I really don't get along, I make it work with her because she is my mom but other than that no..  Everything turns into being about her and I don't think I want to hear HER labor stories while I am trying to create mine.  My MIL will def NOT be there if I have my way, she has been so wishy washy with this whole pregnancy that I can't have that shit.  I might have two really close friends in the room too but that is to be questioned as well because that is a very private moment.  Everyone will be allowed to visit while I am labors and then be asked to leave when it is time to deliver.

071115

I had both with my first. My mom really wanted to be there and I liked having her there.
We didn't with the second and won't with the 3rd... Just my husband

Sugarplum0217

My mom will definitely be there. She's a nurse, used to be an OB nurse, and will be there to advocate for me when I can't for myself and I know my SO will be useless freaking out when I'm in pain. All my family members ask my mom to be there for their deliveries, she's awesome. I'm an only child and it was my just my mom and me for awhile, we have an amazing relationship. Plus she's a great photographer so she will take classy right after photos of us bonding.

I also have an incredible relationship with my MIL. I've asked to be there if she wants to and/or makes it in time, they live 8 hours away. She's never given birth so I thought it would be a great experience for her. But that's it.

drudolph11

They will all 3 be there (i have 2 moms). And it's because I'm really close with both of them and want to share this experience with them if all goes well. Also, my one mom is a nurse and she is also insane lol so as far as me getting the things that i need it makes me a little more comfortable knowing that she will be there. The hospital that i am delivering at (because we only have one where i live so i don't have a choice) is notoriously understaffed and overbooked which consequently causes a lack a care from the nurses, at no fault of their own. So since my mom knows what she is doing and what i may need i feel better having her there if i need an advocate. Plus being a FTM i have no idea what to expect.

rachyrach06

my MIL lives in florida and i'm in TN. she's getting in the car as soon as i go into labor along with my SIL and GIL (?grandma-in-law lol). I am also sure that my step mom will be there b/c she's like a mother to me...unfortunately my mother is in jail. I've never done this so i figured i'd wait and see. I really don't mind who is in there during labor but i won't know on the pushing part. my MIL has already said she understands if i end up kicking her out.

i'm hoping my MIL is an advocate for me...didn't seem like she was on board with my birthplan at first but now she's coming around to the idea of fully natural delivery.

for sure my DH will be in there since we are doing husband coached birthing.

ac123185

The hospital I'm delivering at only allows 2 people in the room, and for my dd my SO and mother were both there. For this is will be my SO and my best friend, my mother wasn't supportive in the way I needed her to be. My SO did an amazing job during the delivery of my dd, so I have no worries there, and my best friend is just the most supportive, caring person.

It really is who you are comfortable with, and who will the make the process as stress free as possible.

peeppeeppeep

Just DH - I think we'll both be more relaxed and happier that way.  My mom is awesome, but I really want this time to just be about the two of us.

Still debating if we want visitors afterwards in the hospital at all.  My ILs live nearby, but FIL drives both DH and I crazy.  In fact, he recently had surgery at the same hospital I'm delivering at and was an absolute nightmare of a patient and was abusive to the staff as well as his wife.  At the end, he became hysterical and basically discharged himself early by walking out, ranting about how authoritarian the nurses were.  Uh-huh.  Obviously, I'll be in a different area of the hospital, but I'm still glad I have a different last name.

lisap0924

No! Only my H will be in the delivery room. My mother would drive me crazy and be of no assistance to me, plus I'm sure my MIL would be upset she was not invited and like @DM718‌ said-my vagina is not a show.

thursday

Yes I am having my mom in the delivery room and only her. My DH will be right behind the curtain where we both believe he belongs. Neither one of us agrees he needs to see any of that action.. Maybe old fashion thinking but it worked perfect with DD. I just need my mommy lol!!!!

elgizzo

My mom was in with us last time. I liked having her there for the added support. While I was getting stitched up she was able to stay with me while my SO was with the baby. Plus she took those first pics of her being born, him cutting the cord, those first moments. We wouldn't have those if she wasn't there. While they aren't pictures I share with many people, they are some of my favorites to look back on. If I get it my way, she will be in this time too.

LadySnowblood

Just DH. My mom will be keeping DS. Last time, it was just DH because I had a csection.

Adele 1981

I really, really wish my mom could be there. She passed away when I was 19 though, so it'll be just me and DH.

lawsonellis

she will be @Adele 1981‌

Kaidi34

I had my mom and husband with DS and plan to do the same this time. They each held a leg for me and I loved both of their support. I couldn't imagine it without both of them.

Clobert

Just my DH and a doula. I haven't told my mom we hired a doula. I love my mom but I absolutely do not want her in the delivery room. She causes me stress. She has already told me random birth stories that had thing a go wrong while trying to be helpful and I want her kept out at all costs. We were actually both in the delivery room for a friend and while she was supportive she also thought everything was an emergency and I need calm people.