The same people invited to 2 showers?

kaytie.s · January 2009

I *thought* I had convinced everyone that DH & I didn't want a shower, and would rather have an orphanage shower.( DH and I only got married in April, and didn't want a shower b/c we feel that it is too soon to the wedding.) But this week it has been brought to my attention that I will be having 2 showers.

My MIL is organizing one shower, and some friends (mainly from work) are organizing another. It sounds like they will be held on the same weekend, too.

My concern is that the same people seem to be involved with both showers- my mom mentioned the date to me last night, and told me she had been in contact with my friend from work.

Isn't it rude to invite the same people to two showers- much less on the same weekend? I know I can't really get involved, but I feel like it is begging for gifts, which we really wanted to avoid.

wanticecream · January 2009

ooo..that's tough. I guess if it's relaly out of your hands then just pull your friends aside and tell them to not bring gifts to both. I almost had that happen and was goign to tell my work friends to not bring gifts to the family shower but it turned out to not be an issue b/c I was able to separate the two without a problem.

kaytie.s · January 2009

One issue is that the work/friends shower is going to be somewhat of a "surprise"- my friend told me the likely date, but wants to keep other aspects a surprise.

Maybe I can convince the work/friends group to do a "book" shower? As in, bring a book for the baby's library?

Still, I feel awkward.

ZetaGirl22 · January 2009

You could always invite all of the people to both showers, and give them the option of going to whichever date is more convenient for them. Have the two people hosting them maybe send invitations out together? or put info for both of them in both invitations.

kaytie.s · January 2009

ZetaGirl22:
You could always invite all of the people to both showers, and give them the option of going to whichever date is more convenient for them. Have the two people hosting them maybe send invitations out together? or put info for both of them in both invitations.

That is a good thought! I wonder if I can just convince MIL & Mom to host one bigger shower though- I will try, I think. I can't imagine being a guest at two showers for the same baby on one weekend!!

kruegs1982 · January 2009

If I were invited to two showers for the same person I would probably just show up to one depending on how close I was to that person.

If I was close to that person, I would buy two smaller presants.

I think your guests are smart enough to understand that it's beyond your hands and the fact that you are having a baby so close to your wedding is no reason to not have a shower! Enjoy it now because you won't be so lucky to get another baby shower with your 2nd child.

kaytie.s · January 2009

kruegs1982:
If I were invited to two showers for the same person I would probably just show up to one depending on how close I was to that person.
If I was close to that person, I would buy two smaller presants.
I think your guests are smart enough to understand that it's beyond your hands and the fact that you are having a baby so close to your wedding is no reason to not have a shower! Enjoy it now because you won't be so lucky to get another baby shower with your 2nd child.

I just hope that not everyone shows up to the same one!! You are right though, this will likely be the last time we have anything like this happen... better to enjoy it!

MissLMS · January 2009

Is there any way to split up the guest list to where your coworkers won't be invited to two showers?

We are having three showers and other than our parents, the guest lists are completely separate. I wouldn't want people feeling like they had to come to both.

Hunter22 · January 2009

Has anyone asked you who you would like to be invited? My mom and sister had to get a guest list together and asked me for names and addresses and similarly my friends are throwing me a shower and asked for a list of people I would want and their addresses/emails as well. It seems odd no one has asked who you would like there and knowing there are two showers not wanting to duplicate the guest list.?

kenandlaura06 · January 2009

Unless it was a sister or my bff, I wouldn't feel comfortable with the same people being invited to two different showers.

And just curious, what is an orphanage shower?

kaytie.s · January 2009

kenandlaura06:
Unless it was a sister or my bff, I wouldn't feel comfortable with the same people being invited to two different showers.

And just curious, what is an orphanage shower?

My friends know who to invite, so for that shower the guest list isn't an issue. My MIL & Mom on the other hand... who knows. Since this just came up yesterday, I feel I can call my mom and ask her who she intends to invite. And I probably will tonight!

As far as orphanage showers are concerned... my younger sis is adopted from Korea, and we have long been actively involved in the adoptive community. We have traveled to Korea and stayed in the orphanage my sister came through, and twice escorted babies home to their adoptive families in the US. I also teach Russian & Spanish, and help out with international adoption translations, etc. from time to time.

An orphanage shower is when instead of giving gifts to an expectant mother, people bring gifts for children who will spend some time living with foster families or in an orphanage. Many of these places have little to nothing available for the babies, and depending on the country, sometimes children spend their whole lives in these "homes" (depending on the country's laws regarding babies being released for adoption- very tricky stuff). It is just a way to provide basic necessities to babies in need.

Once you hold those babies in an orphanage who want nothing more than to be close to you... you will always want to help them out.

Want a personalized experience?

The same people invited to 2 showers?

Re: The same people invited to 2 showers?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards