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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
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Toddler and TTC maybe?

amber_06amber_06 member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
I’m not sure if this is the best board to post but couldn’t find a better one- please direct me if you know of a better place! 

We currently have a 14 month old and have been playing to begin ttc baby number 2 this month after returning from our family vacation. We are back now and it’s time to start ttc and I’m now feeling hesitant. My husband is 100% green light to go. The issue isn’t having another child because we both agree we want 1-2 more, it’s the actually being pregnant and delivering. I had a high risk pregnancy with gestational diabetes and other complications last time as well as a pretty traumatic birth experience ending in an unwanted C-section then a struggle with PPD & PPA. I really just started to feel like myself again over the last month or so. My concerns about another complicated pregnancy plus now coupled with having a wild toddler to chase after and my busy work schedule seem to be holding me back from feeling 100% ready for baby number 2.

I am almost 32 so knowing we do want to continue to grow our family with at least 1-2 more children does put a little bit of time pressure. It also took us 2 years to get pregnant with our first son, so I know it could realistically still be a while, but I guess what I’m wondering, has anyone else felt this way? Any tips on how to handle? Would you wait longer or go ahead with the plan? I also kinda feel like I have a million reasons why we should wait for each month (holidays, busy work season, traveling to friends wedding ect.) and if we wait may never get around to having the next baby- but also I don’t want to rush and regret it later. 

Help! 🤣
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Re: Toddler and TTC maybe?

  • knottie74beb80d3d33a415knottie74beb80d3d33a415 member
    I totally get it—deciding on baby #2 after a challenging first pregnancy and with a busy life is tough. Balancing readiness with timing pressure isn’t easy. Maybe talking to a doctor about managing potential risks could help ease some concerns. No matter what, you’re doing what’s best for your family, and there may never be a perfect time. Trust yourself!
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  • amber_06amber_06 member
    Thank you! 
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  • knottie0f437c68bd4d1590knottie0f437c68bd4d1590 Just Joined
    Hi there! 😊

    I totally understand where you're coming from. Balancing the needs of a toddler while thinking about trying for another can feel overwhelming at times. It’s amazing that you’re already considering how this will affect both your current little one and your family dynamic.

    What helped me was involving my child in small steps, like talking about babies in a positive light or reading books about becoming a big sibling. I also discovered some great ideas for sensory toys that help keep little ones engaged and support their development. For example, I found some amazing options on Bumblebee Smart (http://bumblebeesmart.com). These toys can be helpful for preparing your toddler for changes while also aiding in their growth.

    At the same time, it’s important to acknowledge your own feelings and give yourself grace. Every family’s journey is unique, and what works for one might not work for another.

    Have you thought about what kind of support system you’d like to have in place? Talking to other moms who’ve been through similar situations has made a big difference for me.

    Wishing you all the best as you navigate this exciting, yet sometimes uncertain, chapter! 💛
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  • froggerbluefroggerblue member
    @amber_06 I have been through a similar train of thoughts.
    Maybe sharing my story will help you make the best decision for you.

    I had been TTC for my first child for over 4 years and had quite a hard time because of numerous miscarriages. The pregnancy has also been rough for me with gestational diabetes and hyperemesis gravidarum. I had a hard time eating and keeping anything down all pregnancy. I was miserable and lost weight (At 39 weeks, I was 10kg lighter than when I got pregnant). At least, the birthing process went well even if I was induced and I had high blood pressure.
    I have to start by saying I always wanted two children. I thought about it almost daily "do I really want to go through another pregnancy?". When I settle for "yes", the "when" question came into play. I know I couldn't wait until I felt like myself again, because that would definitely weaken my resolve to go through another miserable 8 months. So with my partner, we decided to just jump into it. We got pregnant immediately (something we didn't anticipate) and the pregnancy went better than for my first child. The pregnancy was still hard : had gestational diabetes, was exhausted with my first and was still in the postpartum period, but I think everything worked out in the end. I feel like I made the right choice for me, but I must admit I had my doubts at times.

    Try to make the choice that you feel more comfortable with. There's never a perfect time, but there are definitely better times than others for each one of us.

    Wish you the best!!
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