I'm 20 weeks pregnant in 2 days. Half way. I'm 39 and have an 18 year old daughter and now I'm having a son. I'm just scared. It's been a long time and it's not that I don't think I can do it but im anxious. My belly is really showing now and he kicks alot. It's not like I didn't think it was real before, but now it's real. I have everything I need other then bottles and diapers. I'm doing this alone. I'm with the father but he doesn't help and didn't want me to keep him to begin with. I feel like he's coming around but I just feel scared and alone.
Re: I'm scared and I feel alone.
No need to answer if you’re not comfortable sharing, but since your partner didn’t want to keep the baby to begin with, is this an unplanned pregnancy? I’m asking because my pregnancy is a surprise too and it just feels so different from the last two that were very planned (and also took several months of trying each). It still doesn’t feel totally real to me that we’re going to have another baby, despite my belly being big and feeling lots of kicks. Unplanned vs planned is like night or day, I have hard days where I just feel mad that I’m pregnant, I was so relieved to never do this again and here I am. I know I’ll love the baby just as much as my big kids, but it’s still very weird and abstract (and probably will be until baby is here).
But, my husband is very supportive and told me from day one that he’d support any decision I made, and having him in my corner does make all the difference. I’m so sorry you don’t have that support. Are there any other family members or friends you can lean on?
DD born 4/1/2023
Baby #3 EDD 11/21/2024
Definitely look for support in friends family, even online! Just don’t do this alone!
My insurance is through Kaiser and they have a Centering Pregnancy group for moms with similar due dates to hangout and learn/re-learn preg and baby stuff. Safe place to talk about life and emotions and everything else that comes during this unique time. I wonder if there are some options like that through your insurance or maybe in your community that you can join?
Sending you warm internet hugs and strength in the meantime.
Me: 31 DH: 34
Married 11/09/2013
LO#1: LMP 09/14/2014 BFP 10/15/2014 EDD 06/24/2015 DS Born 06/14/2015
LO#2: LMP 09/18/2016 BFP 10/19/2016 EDD 06/27/2017 DD Born 06/27/2017
LO#3: LMP 05/16/2018 BFP 06/18/2018 EDD 02/20/2019