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TTC after 35
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Confused & need help w/direction

renesmeyorenesmeyo member
in TTC after 35
Hey first time posting, but not new to bump. I’m turning to here just to ask for some other experiences you have had.
I am 41. TTC since October 2022. I have a 2.5 year old & a 14 month old. Both boys were conceived naturally & healthy pregnancies. I have been pregnant 3 times. My last pregnancy ended in miscarriage @ 6weeks, in April 2023. We have been trying using timing of the month (for severa months), then I started using opks, checking cm & cervix for the last 6months. My cycles used to be very predictable & standard, ever since mc in April I have questions & & confused, as it seems I bleed (not spot) every 2 weeks. This makes ttc very difficult. We have sex almost every day once period stops, & even if it hasn’t fully sometimes. It’s tiring.
My question, when should I start looking @ getting outside help with fertility? Is it expensive (like I always imagined it would be), could my age be why my cycle is so off…or because I had a recent miscarriage?
Sorry for the long post, it is my first time so I wanted to also provide some back info about myself. Please be honest & direct. Thank you bumb family
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Re: Confused & need help w/direction

  • 00kim0000kim00 member
    Age may impact cycles, but that's also an indication of fertility. Mc can also affect cycles. But, I'd make an appointment with an RE immediately if your heart is set on another child. Technically, after age 35 they say if you've been trying for 6 months or more to get tested, but I don't think mc resets the timer. At 41, time is at a premium. Even IVF is unlikely to work at this point (not impossible! I got pregnant at 41), and the chances pretty much drop off a cliff at 42. Testing, consultation, and treatments take months. It is very expensive, even more so for us older ladies (online they say medications average around $2500, but at our age, mine were about $15,000 for one cycle. That's in addition to the $15-20k+ for the procedures). BUT, you might have insurance that covers it. Some states (MA for example) require it and some companies offer it standard (Google, Starbucks, etc. but I'm a state government employee and I even had some coverage). Expect testing alone to cost $200-5000. If you conceive naturally in the process, great, you're only out what you've already paid. 
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  • renesmeyorenesmeyo member
    Wow thank you for your wealth of information & taking the time to share it. Very much needed to hear. Not discouraged yet, but there’s no way we could afford the medical route, I may have to start coming to terms with not expanding our family…but gonna keeping trying trying trying
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