Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
gingermama29
member
Re: Weekly check in 4/24
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: green
Baby is the size of a(n): kale or spaghetti squash
Upcoming appointments: just had my glucose screening today. Hopefully I won’t get a call back. The nurse got concerned when she took my BP and the Velcro kept moving she said it was high 130/60 and so she made me do it again with another machine and it was 100/60 🤨 scare me for no reason
How are you feeling? Feeling bigger. Feeling like I wobble a bit. Have some leg cramps at night so I try to hydrate but then you have to pee so you don’t win.
Raves/Rants: Raves: I’ve been doing these lovely WEdays with my partner every Saturday. Pretty much whatever I want to do whatever I want to eat and it’s been bringing us closer, especially before we have our first kid together. Rants: my lovely sisters and mil are planning my baby shower. I appreciate it so much but my mom is so detached and it’s not like she’s dead, she’s very alive, lives with my sister, and has been bitching that she doesn’t want to go because she doesn’t want to see my cousins on my fathers side and she has no money and has no jewelry to wear. Like who the f cares about that nonsense. She’s been really selfish and calling my sisters everyday to say she really doesn’t want to go. She is a gambling addict and she has a lot of issues, she maxed out all her credit cards and continues to gamble. She has her SS now so she gets monthly money but will blow it all the day she receives it. She won’t go for help it’s been a problem we’ve been dealing with since I was a child. Once we sold our childhood home she was missing for 3 weeks and she gambled away hundreds of thousands of dollars. But yeah it hurts that this is my first child and she has no interest. I don’t need the money for the baby shower I just want her present but it’s already too much effort for her. Sorry for the long rant.
Questions: none right now
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: blue
Baby is the size of a(n): cauliflower? The other day the app said slightly smaller than a 2liter. How big of a cauliflower are we talking about?
Upcoming appointments: not yet, next week
How are you feeling? I’m maybe starting to get some more energy. I’m also getting over a stomach bug and my appetite is finally returning.
Questions: no
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: Blue 💙
Baby is the size of a(n): 🥥 coconut
Upcoming appointments: another check up in 2 weeks
How are you feeling? Feeling great! Still dealing with tiredness, RLP, and generally feeling heavy, but those baby movements and kicks are giving me so much joy.
Raves/Rants: we’re into the craziest part of my school year. I’m 2 weeks away from the concerts and the elementary musical I’m directing which means long dress rehearsals and keeping my 5th and 6th graders focused.
Questions: nope
you’ll be able to relax and enjoy yourself without worrying too much!
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: Team Green
Baby is the size of a(n): Spaghetti squash
Upcoming appointments: Our last attempt at an anatomy scan next week (5/4). Fingers crossed they can actually see what they need to just for peace of mind, if anything else. Glucose test on 5/9.
How are you feeling? Pretty good, heavy. Fatigue is starting to hit more in waves.
Raves/Rants: Rant: we gave ourselves the deadline of the end of April to find a house and as we get closer to that date, I'm getting kind of bummed. It would have been chaotic, for sure, but we have never loved this house and we were looking forward to moving. Rave: I'm going to see "Are you there God, it's me Margaret?" with some friends on Sunday. I read that book so much in my pre-teen years and I'm looking forward to seeing it for nostalgia reasons, even if it's not a great movie.
Questions: Does anyone have a toddler that still likes to be rocked? I definitely don't want to buy another glider, but I'm debating on buying a second hand rocker, or one that's more decorative and could be re-purposed, or just trying to break her of it completely. She doesn't ask every night, but man, when she does I just love rocking and snuggling her and I know it's going to be short-lived
@lmn823 I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I hope your mom gets out of her own head and realizes the focus should be on you and that you have a lovely shower!
@tumbleweed-1 I totally get the anxiety and I always find I'm worse if I'm going by myself vs. with SO. It's like I have more time to think about it. I hope you're able to enjoy your trip
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: blue
Baby is the size of a(n): cantaloupe but baby is also measuring like a week ahead
Upcoming appointments: may 4th
How are you feeling? Honestly terrible. I’ve been so tired and this month has been constant something and no rest days. I’m also so so cranky and it makes me feel so bad but I feel like I am either going to blow up or breakdown or both. And my hips and pubic bone hurt. Not having fun lately and my mental health feels like it’s in the toilet.
Raves/Rants: rant, we’re too busy. I want to hide in my house until baby is here but there is only one weekend that is completely free until august. Rave, it’s almost may and it’s the only month we’re not busy. I am looking forward to the rest.
Questions:
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: Blue
Baby is the size of a(n): no idea
Upcoming appointments: next Friday OB
How are you feeling? Not bad. A little more irritable this week, I think stress related. I’m not sleeping as well and wI’ll wake up sore from not turning over in my sleep
Raves/Rants: Work….I thought I had things straightened out with staff and plans for when I’m gone. My staff has gone rogue. Not all of them but many issues all of a sudden which don’t make sense. I know things are changing so for some they are anxious but I just can’t right now. My
time is running out. My goal is that end of June I will have mostly backed out of my role temporarily and right now I’m not confident in temporarily handing over the business.
Questions: nope
me. Haven’t found a good place to go yet but I plan to get a few scheduled.
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: blue
Baby is the size of a(n): eggplant
Upcoming appointments: I have an US coming up in the next few weeks. I’m not sure when my next midwife appointment is.
How are you feeling? I feel pretty good. My emotions can go crazy sometimes and I never know what will set me off. I feel like I’m carrying really well this pregnancy and I know it a because I haven’t gained a ton of weight.
Raves/Rants: My youngest has alopecia. He has a pretty decent sized bald spot on the crown of his head. The doctor said it was likely brought on by getting sick with so many viruses back to back. He also said it looks like it’s done falling out because the hair that’s still there is not coming out at all. So now we just wait for it to grow back. He also wrote me a note stating my toddler should not be excluded for having a runny nose. I had another daycare worker talk to me about his runny nose. What is everyone’s problem? Am I suppose to be a hermit because my toddler is a germ factory? How do they expect any moms with toddlers to go anywhere if they can’t bring their child who has a runny nose? It’s stupid. Anyways, he has a note on a letterhead from the office stating he is fine even with a runny nose. It’s ridiculous it’s even necessary.
Questions:
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: blue
Baby is the size of a(n): cauliflower
Upcoming appointments: repeat anatomy scan may 2
How are you feeling? Had cramping on Tuesday, it has settled out though. Exhausted.
Raves/Rants: woken up at 3am Tuesday morning by a stranger blaring his horn in our yard. Chicken coop had lit on fire. No survivors. We (husband, FIL and I) got it put out before it spread too bad. Thank goodness for our unseasonably late spring, the ground was still soaked from all the snow. Shop roof had caught but because of the stranger waking us we got it out. It was so windy, it should have been worse. Good thing my FIL was there (my BIL had surgery Monday so he was staying with us because he lives 6 hrs away). I’m so tired. Just emotionally done. I didn’t even go to the hospital for the cramping I didn’t want to make decisions so just Jesus take the wheel and it stopped. Little guy seems ok now, moving normally and everything.
Questions: does stress mess with your glucose test? I had mine Tuesday afternoon on no sleep.
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: blue
Baby is the size of a(n): cantaloupe
Upcoming appointments: we’ve got fetal echo + OB on Monday afternoon.
How are you feeling? Honestly not that bad? I went on two big walks yesterday and definitely overdid it. We live in a hilly city and I can never catch my breath! And emotionally I’m ok this week mostly. This was in “off” week for scans, which means I could focus on other parts of my life and I find the off weeks easier to manage. Getting on that ultrasound table is emotionally intense and exhausting so I’m happy to not have to do it till Monday. We did hear from our cardiologist though and after consulting with the big shots in Boston, they want to give our baby a completely different diagnosis 🤦♀️ im not upset about it because as a result of their disagreement, Boston will continue to review new scans with us and our doctors every two weeks. I just want as many smart eyes on it as possible so we can make a plan for the best outcome. They can disagree all they want, and hopefully it’ll keep them super engaged in the case. So despite the confusion I’m grateful for all of their time. They’re truly so hardworking and I feel like we have an exceptional team of collaborators.
Raves/Rants: I’m not sure yet if this will be a rave or a rant. I received my first “explanation of benefits” from insurance. They said they’re not covering the first fetal echo/consult. Our doctor billed $5400 for it, and we’re doing it every two weeks for the next 16 weeks. Can you believe it?? That’s $45k and the baby isn’t even born yet. That said, the amazing care team told me that if I ever get a bill like that to call them and they will handle it with insurance so that I don’t have to. It’s very clear that monitoring this baby’s heart is a medical necessity and will literally save his life. So, ranting at the cost of care, raving at the existence of insurance (assuming they cover it), and the care team that’s helping us navigate this.
Questions: Do you have to fast for the glucose test? How long?
@ccmrc143 I'm sorry you're having to deal with the hassle of insurance on top of everything else. I'm glad you have people handling it for you.
I fast for the glucose test if it's early in the morning, but I don't have to for the 1 hour. My doctor cautioned that not eating can also cause a spike, so I think it's just more important to focus on food that won't cause one. I'm more nervous this time since mine is in the afternoon. I'm just going to eat only protein lol. My PCOS makes me nervous. I believe if I have to do the 3 hour, I will have to fast.
Team Finding Out/Pink/Blue/Green: Green
Baby is the size of a(n): cantaloupe minus 1 day
Upcoming appointments: Glucose and 24 week appt next week. @msjaay my PCOS is also making me nervous for this one! I told my doctor that I’m probably going to fail it, since I basically failed it pre-baby when we were going through infertility treatment. He offered for me to do a 2 hour screening because of that history, which will just be a one and done thing. I’m thankful for that so I can just know and be done with it! I’m still nervous about it but at least I won’t have to do two. And who knows maybe the results will surprise me and my insulin issues are magically fixed with pregnancy lol.
How are you feeling? Better! More energy. But also definitely getting some hip pain and feeling heavy. I really need to wear compression socks to work because my legs feel terrible after and I’m starting to get a spider vein by my knee.
Raves/Rants: Rantish: definitely getting more emotional. Had two instances at work last night that I had to deal with crabby people for things that weren’t my fault, and it was just annoying. Normally that’s whatever for me but yesterday I got filled with insta-rage and then almost started crying. Blegh
Questions: none