I really wish there wasn’t a shortage of vehicles. I want a 12 passenger van and I’m going to end up getting a suburban instead. I need enough space in the trunk with the 3rd row in use. I’m going to miss my mini van. I could get a used passenger van but I don’t want one without some of the bells and whistles. It would be like going back to the dark ages. I can’t live in Alaska without heated seats. I live for those heated seats. Plus I can get the rear entertainment system already built in. I won’t have that with a van. This is such a first world problem. 🤦🏻♀️
It doesn’t seem like that petty of first world problems. You have a big family and live in an area that you need to drive to get around. (Ok, so I haven’t been to Alaska, but from my limited knowledge, it’s not like a large metro area where you have businesses close together or a convenient bus system) Plus it’s snowing half the year, isn’t it? I don’t even like to drive on snow. 😅 we don’t get much in the part of the PNW I’m in. You shouldn’t feel bad for wanting to enjoy the vehicle you’ll be spending lots of time in
@tumbleweed-1 I live in an area that has a bus system and stores. We even have a decent mall. The roads are treacherous though. Lots of black ice and cars are always flipping off the road. So I need something dependable and something that can get up hills of ice. I’m from the south so I’m new to driving in these snowy conditions. Although, I have been here long enough to learn quite a bit. Studded tires go a long way in helping to stay on the road. Suburbans are just huge vehicles. I need the trunk space though. There isn’t any point in being able to fit everyone in a vehicle if we can’t fit our gear or outdoor toys for summer.
I’ve been thinking about that for car space. We have a Honda Accord, which will fit 4 people in easy enough. But with two car seats in the back, I’m going to have to get better at tetris for camping trips. And no more shoving oversize things in diagonally (like the bedframe I just bought) or SO’s snowboard… maybe we just need a top rack…
We discovered this week my daughter is like six inches from being too tall for her toddler bed. She has a convertible crib/toddler bed/full bed, so the next step would be a real, actual adult bed. Aaaaaack that's weird. She's only 3 but absurdly tall, and even though she sleeps with her head basically against one end, her feet are about six inches away from the other, and she's due for a growth spurt soon (I know not 6 inches, but it feels like time is running out there). So now I'm trying to think about this realistically -- can we bump her to a full size bed and use her crib/toddler mattress for baby, and not have to buy a second crib mattress when it's such a limited lifespan on her current one? Or is that rushing her into a too-big bed, since that'll eat up more bedroom space and cut into where she can play? It's probably the best bet but I'm just not emotionally ready for her to be that big yet! (I know we could get her a twin bed and use the crib for baby, but I really want them to each have their own new bed that's only theirs -- since so much of my daughter's stuff will be handed down to Baby, I want her to feel some ownership of something that is and will only be hers, and likewise, down the road I want Baby to know they have something that was new and just for them, not a hand-me-down.)
I would just bump up to a full sized bed. Baby isn’t going to know or care that it’s handme down. There is plenty of time for them to have their own new things
@justyouraveragemama my DDs bed actually is what converts to a full bed -- so if we do a full, she'd just keep that since we already have the frame conversion set. And the more I think about it, if we do that we can move the chair in her room into baby's room since we could fit in her bed to read before lights out, so she doesn't lose THAT much space...and not have to buy a glider or whatever.
I switch out the crib mattress with each baby. They get super worn by the time a new baby arrives and is ready for the crib. I actually just ordered a really nice one off of Amazon for my 16 month old and I put it on my Amazon registry so I can use the completion discount.
@ki1244 I think I would just go ahead and move her so that you didn't have to buy another crib mattress. I'm moving my daughter pretty early (she's 2) so that we don't have to buy another crib. We have a really nice mattress (Newton) so I really didn't want to buy another one of those and another crib!
I took the kids up the mountains to sled today. The wind was like razors but we stayed out there for 2 hours. I probably overdid for the amount of activity I’m suppose to be doing but my kids have really needed to be outside with their friends. They sled down a portion of the mountain and my toddler sled down the pathway that the cross country skiers were using. My two youngest had a hard time getting comfortable out there but once they settled and started having fun it was smooth sailing. At one point it was just a symphony of tears.
I’ve also struggled keeping up with the outside expectations my DS has (that I’ve set for him 😅). I took him out for 2 hours yesterday and it was the most time I’d spent with him outside since New Year’s Day. We are going on a trip with grandparents and cousins this weekend, hopefully we can all take turns with getting the kids out plenty. You reminded me I should look up where to sled because there isn’t enough snow this week in the town we are staying in, but most mountain ski type resorts don’t allow personal sleds.
@tumbleweed-1 We were out where people climb the side of the mountains and then ski or sled down. So definitely not a resort but I had to drive an hour out and the roads were winding through the mountain pass. Sledding scares me. I told the kids I reserve the right to cancel all their fun if I feel there are any safety concerns. Me and one of my sons got into a sledding accident in 2020 and I’m terrified of someone getting seriously injured. Luckily the place they were at wasn’t too bad and all the kids did a good job of staying out of the sledding path.
It’s probably too soon for a lot of the group here, but when do the start thinking of names threads happen? We’ve had a girl name set since we had DS. When I had a 12 week u/s yesterday, the tech “guessed” boy and it’s silly but it just didn’t occur to me that I might be naming another boy and I don’t know. I’ve read lists on past BMB for ideas, but I’m down to toss them around on a thread here whenever anyone else is comfortable with it
@pickle-chips I wish my husband would toss around ideas this early. He won’t even discuss it until we get pretty close to delivery. I’m always bringing up ideas and he just shoots them down.
@tumbleweed-1 the kids have already asked about names. I know we will have a short list once we find out what we are having. Then narrow it to two names with the middle name set before birth. I found with both our kiddos we just waited until they were born to decide. My first didn’t have a name for 24 hours I was so worried I’d pick wrong. My second it was within an hour of birth.
@emeraldcity603 that is my problem is I’ll keep throwing names out there hoping my husband will like something and he always says “nope”
@lmn823 they want the birth certificate signed before you leave. You need it for that. I’m sure people have just put something down and then when they decided went and had it changed. But then that filler name is on the birth certificate.
@lmn823 I think just before you leave. I was discharged 24 hours after birth and I used every bit of that 24 hours to name my daughter I was so sure we were having a boy that I came with one boy name and apparently too many girl names!
My last son didn’t have a middle name until 48 hours after he was born. The midwives brought the birth certificate over at one of my checkups and we added it after we were able to decide.
Mine also wasn’t officially named until you checked out when he was 2 days old. A nurse told me once that they didn’t name one of their kids until they were a week old. I’m not sure what the legal cut off is, but it’s supposed to be fairly quickly so that you can get documentation and insurance going for them.
@lmn823 If you’re in the US, they recommend having the name chosen before you leave the hospital so that the hospital can submit the paperwork for you, but it’s not required. If you don’t have a name before you are discharged, you’ll need to handle the paperwork and submit it yourself. I think you will probably need a name for SSN and insurance after the first month.
@lmn83 Like others have said, before you are discharged they want you to sign the paperwork for their birth certificate. With both of mine I was given the paperwork the next morning but I also delivered at night both times. It’s really not that bad; I just always second guessed and would double check spelling and everything because I was tired.
@tumbleweed-1 we have first names already picked out, but working on middle. It's sort of a thing in my family where all three of the grandkids so far have two middle names so we still need to find a cadence of names we like. My husband and I had differing ideas for my daughter's middle name up until she was born, and after an exhausting delivery we were both like "screw it, she gets both". My niece and nephew both had two middle names already (niece has my/my sister's maiden name as Middle Name 2, and nephew is adopted so he has my BIL's traditional family middle name but his birth parents also chose a middle name for him too) so by this point, this kid basically has to have two middles or be the odd one out.
For me, the pregnancy really becomes *real* once I can start addressing the baby by name, so we for sure want that piece settled by the time we find out gender. For now we've been calling him/her Baby Gremmy (a little cuter than Gremlin? Which my sister used once and it stuck) but a real name is probably a little more respectful.
@tumbleweed-1 not too soon! I’m already deep into it because I love baby names. There’s a podcast I love called Baby Name Envy with two British sisters who help people with name dilemmas. It’s the best!! Last time we came into delivery with a solid boy name and a couple girl options. We had a boy and when the doctor asked what his name was, DH said it (Simon Vincent) and I said wait I’m not sure! But then I was too tired and just accepted it. I love it now!
@emeraldcity603 DH also won’t talk to me yet about names. He shuts down everything. And he wants to wait until we know the gender to discuss which I get in theory but because I love baby names so much, I want to create long lists for both genders before we know 😂
I feel like we’re pretty solid on a girl name this time, unless DH decides to entertain my new ideas. We’ll be really struggling for a name if it turns out this baby is a boy. I have a top boy name but DH isn’t a huge fan. I feel like men just say no to every name option without coming up with alternatives! Lol
I’m so incredibly moody today. I went to a play date at an open turf with my kids. It was big, about 10 moms showed up. My kids couldn’t hold it together and they lost it halfway through so we had to leave. Then some random old lady in the parking lot started talking to me while I was strapping my screaming toddler into his seat. I was being polite but eventually she started leaning into my van to talk to my kids. At that point I looked at her and told her we are having behavioral problems and it’s not a good time to socialize. She looked at me like I kicked her in the shin. 🙄
Tomorrow we have a moms night out and it’s dinner. Two people are coming that I don’t particularly like and they both flock to me like I’m their best friend. One lady is from the bush and she is really weird. Like really strange and then the other mom just says inappropriate things all the time. She just had hemorrhoid surgery and she keeps giving very detailed updates on her butthole. I’m glad she is recovering well but geeze, I don’t want to know everything that is going on with your butthole.
@emeraldcity OMG that is TMI 🤣🤣 no thanks lady on your butthole stories 🤣🤣🤣 That’s so awkward but maybe you just have that personality that people are attracted to and comfortable speaking to even when they don’t see the signs around them, like your screaming kids being strapped in the car. I would take it as a compliment 🤣
My best friend moved to a different state and has been trying to make mom friends around her and she has the opposite effect where no moms want to socialize or give her the time of day. I need to hook her up with the hemorrhoids lady.
@lmn823 Actually I’m told I’m very intimidating. My best friend didn’t talk to me for a really long time when I first joined our mom group because apparently my resting face is scary. 😬 I think these ladies have been around me on one of my more bubbly days. Days where I’m super outgoing and smiling. The hemorrhoid lady does stupid stuff like expects me to change the dates of events to suit her schedule. I host cards at my house once a month and I kid you not, she messaged me and said she needs me to host a different day so she can attend. I’m sorry, you’re just going to have to miss that event. I schedule things that I host on my timeline, not everyone else’s. Plus, I can’t drop what I’m doing and just have tons of play dates and events every morning of the week. I homeschool my kids and I take their education serious. So we have to get that done before we do anything else.
@emeraldcity603 literally did a spit take on my phone with the butthole lady. I am dead. 😂😂😂
Also at the risk of Mean Girl-ing, I very nearly responded about cloth diapers earlier but thought "Nah, just gonna get the popcorn, Emerald is going to shut this down far more succinctly" and you did not disappoint.
We have the busiest weekend ahead of us and I'm not so sure how my kid is going to roll by Sunday. Today even though she was dog tired, she decided not to nap, and then we had an indoor pool birthday party for a friend from ballet directly over dinner time. So late dinner, she's just now in bed (it's 9:20, whoops), and then tomorrow morning we have another birthday party for her first friend (her mom drives me nuts sometimes but is the friend I refer to a lot who ignored boundaries in my PPD days and just invited herself over to fold my laundry, which it turned out was exactly what I needed, so I have a pretty long leash with her) and then it's my husband's team's rivalry game with the other high school in town (which is actually my alma mater). Sunday is church and then my sister is hosting a Chinese New Year lunch party (we like random holidays in our family...Election Day, Mardi Gras, MLB opening day, stuff like that we make into a THING) and we may or may not hit a third birthday party that afternoon. I like being social but I'm kind of exhausted just thinking about this much people time.
@ki1244 That is a lot of socializing. We do a lot but most of our stuff is during the week because I hang out with mostly homeschooling moms. Me and my best friend typically organize all of our activities too. So we schedule it when it suits the two of us. We have had multiple things fall on the same week and we both swore never again. I’m not sure how you plan to survive this weekend. I’m not sure I could.
I’m not so sure the diaper post wasn’t spam. I was just like why would someone come here to talk about leaking diapers. This is not the place.
I’m really impressed by all of this socializing @emeraldcity603@ki1244 I feel like for me it’s all or nothing. A weekend with 3+ activities or one with zero (like this one). We’re new to our area and I’m very slowly making my way into mom groups but it’s hard. Most of my close friends aren’t even married yet and they live around 2hr away. Hoping that starting preschool in the fall will also help. We have so much house stuff to do all the time too we end up working a lot on that over the weekend. But today we found this awesome farmers market that has a fun kids area with a sandbox and outdoor kitchen — DS loved it. It was the first weekend in a while where I felt like maybe we made a good decision moving here after all
For those of you needing mom friends, I have always found my friends at local MOPS groups. I go to all the planned events and eventually make my way onto leadership. Leadership is where you get the close relationships because you see and talk to those people a lot.
I pass by so many flipped and wrecked vehicles on the highway here because of snow and black ice. My mom used to tell me horror stories about black ice when I lived in AL. In AK black ice is everywhere. Well, we got hit by a vehicle that got thrown sideways from hitting black ice today. He slammed into my door and then the back of his car hit the back sliding door. Then his car did a 180 and slammed into the snow berm. We are all ok. Just shaken up. Ugh, I’m freaking out because I have a hematoma and I’m worried about what the impact could have done to it. My husband is an ER doctor. He isn’t going to want me to go to the ER to get checked. So my midwife is going to send me for another ultrasound this week to check everything. I was on the way to pick my MIL up from the airport. I even told her I was running late because I needed to drive slow due to the road conditions. What a great way to start off this weekend.
Re: Weekly Randoms w/o 1/16
@emeraldcity603 that is my problem is I’ll keep throwing names out there hoping my husband will like something and he always says “nope”
For me, the pregnancy really becomes *real* once I can start addressing the baby by name, so we for sure want that piece settled by the time we find out gender. For now we've been calling him/her Baby Gremmy (a little cuter than Gremlin? Which my sister used once and it stuck) but a real name is probably a little more respectful.
I feel like we’re pretty solid on a girl name this time, unless DH decides to entertain my new ideas. We’ll be really struggling for a name if it turns out this baby is a boy. I have a top boy name but DH isn’t a huge fan. I feel like men just say no to every name option without coming up with alternatives! Lol
Tomorrow we have a moms night out and it’s dinner. Two people are coming that I don’t particularly like and they both flock to me like I’m their best friend. One lady is from the bush and she is really weird. Like really strange and then the other mom just says inappropriate things all the time. She just had hemorrhoid surgery and she keeps giving very detailed updates on her butthole. I’m glad she is recovering well but geeze, I don’t want to know everything that is going on with your butthole.
That’s so awkward but maybe you just have that personality that people are attracted to and comfortable speaking to even when they don’t see the signs around them, like your screaming kids being strapped in the car. I would take it as a compliment 🤣
My best friend moved to a different state and has been trying to make mom friends around her and she has the opposite effect where no moms want to socialize or give her the time of day. I need to hook her up with the hemorrhoids lady.
Also at the risk of Mean Girl-ing, I very nearly responded about cloth diapers earlier but thought "Nah, just gonna get the popcorn, Emerald is going to shut this down far more succinctly" and you did not disappoint.
We have the busiest weekend ahead of us and I'm not so sure how my kid is going to roll by Sunday. Today even though she was dog tired, she decided not to nap, and then we had an indoor pool birthday party for a friend from ballet directly over dinner time. So late dinner, she's just now in bed (it's 9:20, whoops), and then tomorrow morning we have another birthday party for her first friend (her mom drives me nuts sometimes but is the friend I refer to a lot who ignored boundaries in my PPD days and just invited herself over to fold my laundry, which it turned out was exactly what I needed, so I have a pretty long leash with her) and then it's my husband's team's rivalry game with the other high school in town (which is actually my alma mater). Sunday is church and then my sister is hosting a Chinese New Year lunch party (we like random holidays in our family...Election Day, Mardi Gras, MLB opening day, stuff like that we make into a THING) and we may or may not hit a third birthday party that afternoon. I like being social but I'm kind of exhausted just thinking about this much people time.