February 2023 Moms

Board Organization

I hope no one minds if I take the initiative to help organize this board a bit.

Welcome to the February 2023 BMB! (I used this template from the October 2022 BMB) If you're new to TB, we're excited to have you! Below you will find information on how the flow of BMBs work, guidelines and helpful links. 

Some links that you may find helpful:

How-To Guides:
  • How to quote: Hit the "quote" at the bottom of the post you want to quote. You will be taken to the reply box with the quote set up already.
  • How to tag: Add a "@" in front of the username of the person you are talking to.
  • How to change your username: log in to TheKnot, hover over My Knot, and click Account Settings. If you are having issues doing it that way, you can email community@thebump.com and ask them to change your username. Give them a few suggestions just in case your top choice is taken. It may take up to 24 hours for the name to update.
  • How to insert a spoiler box: click the drop down list arrow next to the paragraph symbol (third from the left, next to bold and italicize) and choose spoiler. It will insert a grey box, and everything that you type in there will go into the spoiler.

For the sake of board organization, here are some simple guidelines for posting threads:
DO: 
  • Introduce yourself in the "Introductions!" thread 
  • Feel free to start one of the weekly posts listed below: 
  • Post your own thread if you have a confirmed loss (please use a TW)
  • Post a thread that would apply to the entire community and doesn't fall into one of the categories for daily threads listed below (Ex: what to pack in your hospital bag, baby gear, etc)
  • Comment, share advice and show support for your fellow bumpies; this is a two-way street, to get support, you must show it as well.

DON'T:
  • Start a thread asking about symptoms; please post this in the current weekly "symptoms thread" - this is helpful because it keeps the board from getting cluttered and makes it so we can all see the whole discussion in one thread, rather than having one thread about MS, one about food cravings, another about vivid dreams, etc.
  • Ask the community if you are pregnant, it is against TOU
  • Start a thread asking for relationship advice; a professional is better suited for this task
  • Post pictures of your pregnancy test, this is also against TOU
  • Post a thread that asks a question only applying to yourself unless you suspect you may be going through a MC
  • Get bent out of shape if someone calls you out for not following these guidelines; if you expect to be part of a supportive board (which we are), you need to be able to take the time to learn the ins and outs of the board

Weekly threads suggestions! Feel free to add any others you think would be helpful/fun. 

MONDAY
Monday Bitch Fest 
Weekly (or monthly) symptoms thread 

TUESDAY
GTKY ("Get to know you" posted with a thought-provoking question) 
High Risk Check-in

WEDNESDAY
Hump day/bump day 
PAIF check in 
Weekly randoms 
WTF Wednesday

THURSDAY
PGAL check in
Unpopular opinion (UO)
Thankful Thursdays 

FRIDAY
Flame Free Confessions 
TTGP Grad check in 

MONTHLY
What my pregnant self is eating/crying?               
AMA mama check in 
Ask a STM+

Once we all get farther along, we will also have pinned threads for things like ultrasounds, sex announcements, and birth announcements.

I've copy/pasted this from previous boards, and it seems to be the way that they are all organized, but of course we should feel free to tweak for our needs! For example, some boards do weekly ticker changes while others do weekly due date check-ins (ex, DD 1st week of March.). 

If anyone has a suggestion for other threads, please feel free to comment a suggestion.

Let's have a great BMB ladies! 

Me: 34  DH: 34
Married 10/28/17
Our TTC Journey
TTC #1 February '18
Team Green turned Team Blue 10/15/18

TTC #2 January '21
BFP June '21
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21
Jan '22 - started IF testing
BFP Jan '22
MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22
BFP May '22


Re: Board Organization

  • krb99krb99 member
    @tessiesmom26 Thanks for starting the board discussions!
  • Loading the player...
  • woah, I had no idea there were rules other than being nice basically and not arguing haha. Thanks for sharing!
  • Thanks for doing this work! I already feel more oriented
  • Honestly enjoy the “one off” posts much better than your organization. I don’t want to read through pages and pages of responses to random things. The one off posts allow me to scroll through and find what I feel like reading. The rules you’ve decided to put in place and the way you’re policing others posts is ruining the app for me. And I’m not a first timer here. 
  • @kayruhrenae I didn’t want to say anything because it’s my first time using the app but I was a bit turned off my the message board policing as well. I get the “we’ve been here before, you haven’t” vibe which is a bit discouraging as a nervous first time mom/ first pregnancy. Thanks for speaking up so I know it’s not just me 🙃
  • @kayruhrenae the point of the organization and reading through the posts is so that you can have a conversation and create relationships. The message boards aren’t meant to be an alternative to a Google search. If you just post what’s important to you without contributing, that isn’t really the spirit of the board. 

    I’m sorry you dislike the organization and prefer the one off posts. We did discuss it early on in setting up the board that we prefer to keep it organized and get to know one another. This is how virtually every successful BMB is set up. 

    To you and @ke@kelsdoogs I’m sorry if you find my and other’s direction to organize the board off putting. I have always tried to be excessively kind in offering direction and from what I’ve seen, so have the others. I know I always respond to one off posts bc if I was new, I would want someone to point me in the right direction. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • As someone who was here in the “before times” before boards were organized this was (it’s across the board - not just this one), I was also slightly annoyed at the strict rules with my last BMB when this was started (but I’m also a rule follower, haha, so get annoyed when people don’t follow the rules), also - BUT, I was scrolling through a certain other mom board forum, and there were literally PAGES and PAGES of one-offs that were hard to get through, and there would be no way to have conversations and get to know anyone. 

    We could start a weekly or monthly “questions” thread, also, if that would be easier than including it in the weekly check-in and chit-chat threads.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BabyFruit Ticker

    image 

  • Just want to add - these are not hard and fast "rules" and I did not create them, I pulled them from another board. We can add and adjust as needed. I've seen boards have one large question thread which I do think is excessive, so I am game for a monthly or weekly questions thread. Also if someone feels the need to ask something that is not mentioned above, that is fine, as long as it allows for conversations for the whole board and not just one specific person. 
    Me: 34  DH: 34
    Married 10/28/17
    Our TTC Journey
    TTC #1 February '18
    Team Green turned Team Blue 10/15/18

    TTC #2 January '21
    BFP June '21
    MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21
    Jan '22 - started IF testing
    BFP Jan '22
    MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22
    BFP May '22


  • i appreciate the guidelines, some of them are helpful... it was just the consistent "thanks for contributing but post this here instead" that i find to be annoying. it makes it so that when i want to read/ respond to a post, instead of seeing the conversation, that response is the first thing listed. i work full time and don't have time to click a thread that looks interesting to then have to go and find it again buried in another thread because someone thought that was easier.

    to say, "The message boards aren’t meant to be an alternative to a Google search. If you just post what’s important to you without contributing, that isn’t really the spirit of the board." is silly. people are going to use message boards for different things, if someone wants to use it to ask opinions and get suggestions vs. wanting to make new friends, what's the issue? we all have enough on our plates navigating pregnancy and parenthood to be concerned with such trivial issues like policing a thread. it makes it not very enjoyable. 
  • @kelsdoogs I think the difference here is that we (and I am speaking for others, so correct me if I am wrong) are looking to build a community, not just have a message board. The Bump itself calls this a community, you can see right at the top of this page. 

    For example, @runningyogimama and I were both a part of November 2018 BMB and we still to this day have a FB group where we all update each other and connect with Moms who all have babies the same age. When you make it a community, you get that comradery even after baby is born. If this board eventually moves to FB or another platform, I know that I am going to want to make sure I know these people and have built relationships before giving up personal information.  

    Just as you think it's not enjoyable to have to look up a thread, I think it's not enjoyable to have to read a million different threads all asking the same question. I also work full time, so when I am able to make it here, having it organized to be able to find what I am looking for, like a symptom that I might be experiencing, I would much rather have a quick way to click and then come back when I have more time.  
    Me: 34  DH: 34
    Married 10/28/17
    Our TTC Journey
    TTC #1 February '18
    Team Green turned Team Blue 10/15/18

    TTC #2 January '21
    BFP June '21
    MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C July '21
    Jan '22 - started IF testing
    BFP Jan '22
    MMC/Blighted Ovum that led to D&C Feb '22
    BFP May '22


  • nwshaynwshay member
    @kelsdoogs I can see why those comments can be irritating, but every board I've been on within the Bump have been set up that way, and it's really helpful, especially as the 9 months (and beyond) continue. It will get so much more difficult to navigate the board of the one off posts continue. Right now it doesn't seem that way, but later on, scanning through 100 pages of random stuff will be so hard. 

    Everything that @tessiesmom26 has said is totally valid. I was also a part of a BMB in 2017 and we still have ongoing FB groups and we're all very close. Many of us talk every day and have met in person. 

    There are a lot of other websites and apps that are for one off question posts, such as baby center. Not saying anyone should leave, at all. These are just better questions for the randoms or other threads within the board. 

    I promise once the group gets larger, you'll see how much nicer it is with some good organization. 
  • @runningyogimama hi to another old timer. I’ve been posting on TB since 2010 when chaos was totally accepted / expected. (Back when some people who loved 1st/2nd/3rd tri complained about the creation of the BMBs. Gasp!) Luckily I’ve had a few BMBs since then so I have acclimated to the board organization. I no longer feel like yelling “get off my lawn.” 👵🏼 Times change! Thanks for organizing @tessiesmom26
    DD1 6.2011 
    DD2 4.2013 - vbac
    DS1 9.2016 - vbac, team green
    Baby #4 due 9.2018
  • I actually enjoy the one off posts. I think it’s more fun and useful. I’d rather read a quick thread that’s relevant than scroll through pages. 
    I understand though. Just maybe not what some of us are looking for! 
  • Everyone is going to have their preferences of course, but the BMB groups are the ones I prefer over some of the other message boards because of the way they are set up. Since there is more order it becomes more of a support group with back and forth communication than just a place to post random questions and thoughts like a lot of the other app groups out there.
    I do think starting a weekly product thread with some sort of schedule that goes along with the sorts of items we're buying along the way based on the stage (ie nausea support, pregnancy pillows, sleep bras and so forth) is super helpful, so I'd be happy to see that thread added to the week. I can look back at my last BMB to get it started or someone else is welcome to. 
    We could even make the ask a STM+ thread weekly if there were a lot of FTM that didn't want their questions to get lost in the randoms thread? There should be some sort of compromise we can find...
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