Babies: 3 - 6 Months

Poor sleeper, feeling helpless

My lo will be 4 months in less than two weeks and has always been a challenging sleeper. From birth she has wanted to sleep while being held. For the first few months I was running on almost no sleep and feeling anxious and upset. Through a lot of work I finally got her to sleep at night in her bassinet by my bed. We’ve had good nights where she will start with a 4-5 hour stretch then wake up every few hours after but settle easily. But mostly we have bad nights where she wakes frequently and won’t settle, or wakes up as soon as she hits the bassinet. I feel like I’ve read every book and blog. I’ve tried the drowsy but awake and she either cries immediately or takes to herself then cries. She won’t settle unless we pick her up and rock her. She is too young for sleep training and I don’t think I can let her cry. For naps to get quality sleep she needs to be held. She has been in daycare since six weeks and they can’t hold her obviously, so sometimes she naps a total of an hour in the 8 she is there unless she had a random good day where she naps a longer stretch in her crib. It doesn’t seem to make a difference how much she naps because on days she is home and I watch her wake times and sleepy cues, it still doesn’t guarantee a good night. Sorry for the long rant. I’m just feeling so helpless and like I’m doing something wrong. Lately to get any sleep I’ve resorted to bringing her into bed with me, but it’s not ideal because I’m really just not comfortable with it which means it’s not working for us. Most moms I know seem to have babies that can already fall asleep independently or who sleep through the night, so I feel alone. 

Re: Poor sleeper, feeling helpless

  • YOURE NOT ALONE! My little one does not sleep well at night at all. Same age as yours, and waking every two hours to eat. I can say for the post part naps are great though, so that’s a win. I purchased an entire course on laying a healthy foundation for sleep, and I’m still losing HAHA I just keep telling myself it will get better, and that it’s just a season in life. Hang tight momma <3
  • My baby girl was the same way! She never napped and I just couldn’t get her on a schedule bc I felt like she was always overtired! Even if she was dead asleep in our arms as soon as we even leaned over the crib to put her down she started screaming. It was awful. 

    I talked to our pediatrician about sleep and he had a lot of great ideas so I’d definitely suggest talking to your doc about your specific situation. I think she went through the 4-month sleep regression a month early bc pretty much right at her 4 month birthday (after talking to the doc and implementing some of his advice) she naps like a pro and is sleeping 9-11 hours at night. HOPEFULLY yours will get there very soon! We had at least a month+ of this terrible dance but then it improved so so much. Patience!! And tears are ok! 
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  • Briliz807Briliz807 Just Joined
    It’s so tough when you are sleep deprived. I can relate, my first child wouldn’t let us put her down. A really good friend recommended a wonderful book that was a quick read that actually has schedules and “crazy days” included. We saw a difference by the second day. We used the “moms on call” book when our first was 6 weeks old. By the time she was 10 weeks she was sleeping through the night mastered falling asleep independently, she’s now 3 and still a great sleeper. Now that we have our second child we implemented the routine at 2 weeks(per the book) and it’s been smooth sailing from the start. He started sleeping 12 hrs at 11weeks he is now 14 weeks. The books details exactly what the schedule, sleep environment and routine is supposed to look like and how to do soothing rounds to teach them to fall asleep independently. I hope you enjoy the book(they have 0-6mos book, 6-18mos and then a toddler book), it was a life saver for us.
  • My baby girl is 4 months and she never really sleep for more than 2 hours at time and still like that. I am exhausted. I hope it gets better soon
  • My LO went through a major sleep regression early. He woke up every two hours and would fight sleep when trying to put him down for a nap and nighttime sleep. Then he turned 4 months and for no reason and without doing anything differently he started sleeping longer stretches and now he’s sleeping 6.5 to 8 hour stretches. Hang in there it will get better I promise! I spent many nights and mornings crying. It seems so helpless while your in it but it will pass. 
  • Hi I’m in the thick of the 4 month sleep regression with my little one and struggling too! Checkout Taking Cara Babies 3-4 month sleep regression course or buy “The Happiest Baby on the Block” I’m working towards getting my baby to sleep in his crib and he is fighting sleep too and I’ve had to hold him to get any sleep. I’ve heard that by 5 month their sleep gets better so all I can do  is be consistent and hang in there but it’s really hard! I wish you luck on your journey ☺️
  • You are so not alone :) my 4th kid is almost 4 months and it’s the same thing. It’s a baby. The baby will sleep as much as they need. There is nothing you can do until they are 6 months old and then sleep train (Ferber method). It works. Nothing else works as well. Until 6 months old, wearable blankets make life tolerable (like woombie ets), but that’s it.
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