Ask a STM+ thread

wiseh · January 2022

Welcome to all the new bumpies! Looking forward to getting to know you all.

This thread is for first time moms to connect with other first time moms, ask all your questions to those who have been through it before, and have a safe place to share your concerns. No question is silly, I guarantee we’ve all called our OB for something laughable later.

wiseh · January 2022

I have a question! Has anybody else got a toddler and have they sensed your pregnancy? My DD is 2.5 & in the last week she has become SO clingy. When she’s not with me she’s crying for me. She has never, ever been like this and I don’t know if it’s because she can sense my pregnancy or if something else is happening. If it’s my pregnancy, what can I do to help her?

Got this message from her daycare educator yesterday
“Poor little darling is so super emotional today as well . Full tears and crying saying I miss my mum 😭 it’s breaking my heart. She is never like this. She is getting better as the day progresses though we have had a big cuddle after her not wanting any one to touch her m, we read a book as they always seem to keep her mind occupied as well and she is now playing cars”

Today when I left for work she balled her eyes out. My husband took her inside but she escaped the house & started running up and down the road looking for me. She’s since come back inside and has just put herself in my bed, amongst all my pillows, refusing to move 🥺

trapperkeeper87 · January 2022

@wiseh Yes! My girl is 2 (26 months) and about a day before my positive she became more clingy than static. She has never been a cuddly little thing, so this is new territory for me. It's easing up a bit, but she is definitely still all over me. I feel awful I can't give her more attention as a SAHM, but my nausea is really knocking me out.

chefbex · January 2022

I was really doubtful that this could be real, but my 1.5yo son started hugging my bare tummy randomly like a week and a half before a test could detect my pregnancy! Like, lifting up my shirt and pressing his ear against me. Do you think they can tell?!
My boys often go on a hormonal trip with me each cycle, poor things. Could that be a factor?

magnolia209 · January 2022

Yes! Wow. Several days before my positive when we were not even thinking about it yet, my 3 year old said to me, “there’s a baby in your belly”. My husband was there. He looked at me wide eyed. I asked him, do you think? My husband said “no”. I didn’t think so either at the time! 4 or 5 days later my period was late and boobs sore and sure enough! And yes, he has been clingy AF for the past few weeks!

babywiik · January 2022

My 13 month old started having trouble sleeping about the time I got a positive test. She seems to be getting back on track now. I thought it was just a sleep regression but she hasn't had issues with sleep around the other typical times babies have sleep regression so possibly she was reacting to the pregnancy?? Who knows but I wouldn't be surprised!

magnolia209 · January 2022

@babywiik I definitely think they know!!! Dogs too. I don’t have a dog, but every time we pass on on the street it’s very into me - in a way that is not what normally happens!

To clarify my comment above, I think my son learned the phrase “there’s a baby in your belly” recently and was just goofing around when he said it. But it freaked me husband out. My husband now thinks our son is some sort of oracle 🤣.

elle-0409 · January 2022

@magnolia209 That's hilarious! My daughter said, "There are babies in my vagina" the other day and I was like, "What?!" I have never said that.

whitta1015 · January 2022

My 4 year old keeps saying "I want a brother and a sister" so I'm hoping this isn't some indicator that I'm having twins.

beccaneu · January 2022

@wiseh. My 2 and a half year old has also been super clingy lately. I was thinking it was just developmental, but then again who knows what these little ones can pick up on!

wiseh · January 2022

Hahaa @whitta1015 mine is convinced I have 2 babies. I guess we will find out on Monday 😂

Fluffy1187 · January 2022

Moms that already have two…. Talk to me about double strollers. Do I really need one? My daughter will be 3.5 when this baby comes, part of me thinks she is won’t want to use a stroller anymore but currently she is very obsessed, asks to bring it everywhere.

beccaneu · January 2022

@Fluffy1187 I’ve been wondering this as well. A friend of mine has two and said that her older had completely lost interest in the stroller until the baby was born and then all of a sudden wanted to ride in the stroller again since she saw the new baby in it. I personally will probably wait until baby comes to see how my son reacts and then make a decision. Unless I find like a super good deal or something.

trapperkeeper87 · January 2022

@Fluffy1187 I'm wondering the same thing. My daughter is basically over the stroller right now, and will be 34 months when this one arrives. Regardless, I'm still planning to spring for a Mockingbird double stroller because there are times I actually need to use one, and she'll ride in it without much complaint. My friend has one for her daughter and it's so nice and cheaper than the Uppababy. I have a feeling we'll have a few people who want to donate toward it, which will help too. Even if they don't, it's still the one luxury I'm looking forward to!

mokay19 · January 2022

@Fluffy1187 mine are 3 years apart and we never bought a double stroller. My daughter is very independent and preferred to walk. If there was ever a time that I needed them both controlled, then I would put my son in a wrap or carrier and my older daughter in the stroller

theblondebump · January 2022

We bought the uppababy for our first figuring we’d have a second soon enough and it could be a double. It’s honestly so heavy though I can’t imagine it with a second piece haha.

wiseh · January 2022

@theblondebump are uppababy's different in US compared to AUS? My Uppababy vista is a workhorse. I regularly overfill the bottom and find it a breeze to push. Though I am comparing it to my Emmaljunga which is literally 25kg and doesn't have wheels that turn

jhysmath · January 2022

We have a wagon. We got it for my girls birthdays (1 and 3 yo) it is very much used. I didn't find we needed one when my second was a baby and my daughter was 2. She was very good about riding her strider whenever we went for walks with the stroller. The wagon is awesome for the fact that it can hold a bunch of stuff and you can pull out push. Ours has a canopy, and the side unzips to make into a seat.

Regarding kids knowing, we've been ttc since April and my 3 year old started drawing me with a baby inside of me this summer. I would get so excited think she knew it was our month she then be so disappointed with the bfn.

theblondebump · January 2022

@wiseh don’t get me wrong, I love the uppababy, it’s amazing and easy to push BUT it’s 35 lbs empty so lifting it in and out of the car is brutal. I just imagine when there’s a second rumble seat or whatever, it’ll just be even harder to lift.

trapperkeeper87 · January 2022

theblondebump said:

@wiseh don’t get me wrong, I love the uppababy, it’s amazing and easy to push BUT it’s 35 lbs empty so lifting it in and out of the car is brutal. I just imagine when there’s a second rumble seat or whatever, it’ll just be even harder to lift.

Do you have the Vista? I thought that one was only about 26 pounds (I remember that when comparing it to the Mockingbird)?

theblondebump · January 2022

@trapperkeeper87 yes the vista, ah yes sorry its 27 lbs, I was probably thinking of the weight with the car seat or the baby or something lol. But even at 27 lbs it’s a beast to get in and out of the car.

magnolia209 · January 2022

@theblondebump I had an Uppababy Cruz for a month this summer when my then 2.5 year old son and I spent a month at my Mom’s place. It’s was a dream to push and so awesome. But, I agree, heavy!!! But that was just a loan. We had the all time shittiest strollers for real. Well, not the shittiest, but you know. The Chicco I don’t know what was definitely given away in frustration! We actually had a great lower, cost reversible umbrella style stroller - the Omni Reversi - that was so much better than other umbrella strollers, but still, umbrella. But we always thought the Uppa strollers to be the gold standard and what we’d get if we got another shot. Now, I’m not so sure. Plus, my son will be 4 and I don’t really know what we need. We want something amazing this time. I’m not at all ready to start researching. But, I’m so glad you all are talking about this and hope we can continue the stroller/car seat conversation for many months to come!

theblondebump · January 2022

@magnolia209 I’ve never gone anywhere where I needed the stroller and DH wasn’t with me, so I’ve never needed to lift the stroller myself lol. So it hasn’t mattered for me, but I feel like that is not most people’s situation. I loved being able to just click the infant car seat right into the Vista, very very easy. Also, their warranties are the best. In November, we flew to Florida and we gate checked the stroller. Of course when we got off the flight, the stroller was damaged. We were going to Disney in a week or two so we def needed a working stroller. We reached out to uppababy, they just had us send a video of the damage and then they shipped out a replacement part immediately. It was so easy. I also think the uppababy is just really smooth - I push it through all kinds of grass at parks, gravel in parking lots, etc. It’s expensive, but IMO, it’s worth it. The weight is def the downside though. And one other downside is that all of the accessories are sold separately and also kind of pricey, on top of the already large price tag. (Cup holder, snack tray, infant insert, etc) The bottom basket is very roomy though, I put my dog in the bottom and push the baby and the dog around our neighborhood for walks lol.

Amphibious22 · January 2022

@Fluffy1187 my son will be a little over 4 when this baby comes and I can't see him using a stroller. He barely uses one now, even when we go to places like the zoo or Legoland.

@jhysmath I feel like I missed out by not having a wagon. I get a little jealous every time I see a family with one, but we just could never justify the cost. And again, I'm not sure how much my son would use it at 4.

magnolia209 · January 2022

@Amphibious22 Do you think your 4 year old will use one of those ride on, stand up things? I’m thinking that would be the best bet for us. I also can’t see my son using the stroller enough to warrant a double stroller, but he does get tired… I’m really not sure at this point as I’ve never had a 4 year old but mine will turn 4 the day after this baby is due!

Amphibious22 · January 2022

@magnolia209 I've seen those before and I could see him loving it since he loves his scooter, but the stroller we have (Britax) doesn't have one and I just don't want to buy a new stroller. I was more of a wearer with my son anyways though, so hopefully this baby doesn't mind being in a sling or carrier either.

jhysmath · January 2022

@Amphibious22 I have a britax b safe or something like that. It's from 2018, but on Amazon you can find one of those standing things to attach to it. I thought about it before but realized my kids preferred to bike on our walks, I'm sure yours would like the scooter more.

wiseh · January 2022

@Amphibious22 I think you can get universal things that attach to most prams. Might be worth a shot if you can find a cheap one?

Amphibious22 · January 2022

@jhysmath @wiseh I'll definitely look into it! I'm also casually looking at wagons just in case I decide I want to be a cool wagon family. 😂

wiseh · January 2022

@Amphibious22 we have a wagon & love it! Not sure how a newborn would go in it though 😂

jhysmath · January 2022

@wiseh you wear the newborn until they can sit up for the wagon. Just let the wagon schlep all the newborns stuff 😂

@Amphibious22 after doing lots of research on them. We went with a radio flyer one. It allowed me upgrade the wheels so something that would work on dirt roads better (our house in NY is very rural and there's lots of dirt roads) with upgrades it ended up being the cost of a base model wonderfold I believe. My mom got it for the girls birthday because we didn't need anything else. We got upgrades so you can push or pull (pull is easier on dirt roads, push easier around town) extra bag attachments are pretty useful. The one downside to it, the kids sit with their feet in the middle and I get from the 3 year old (she's touching me!) When she's being a grump.

trapperkeeper87 · January 2022

I'm gonna jump on the band wagon (see what I did there? 😄) and also recommend the Radio Flyer wagon. We got the same one as @jhysmath that unzips into a seat and has all-terrain wheels and a canopy. It's genius! We used it at the zoo with just one kid (we got it when she was a year old) and it couldn't have worked out better. When she was due for a nap, we laid her down, lowered the canopy, draped a swaddle over top, and set her fan to high, clipped to the side underneath. She slept so peacefully! It was also great for laying her down for diaper changes so we didn't have to use the dirty bathrooms (October 2020, so early covid times).

It's bulky, but we love it! The added cooler wheeled attachment makes a great spot for a diaper bag, if you don't need or want to bring a cooler.

laj0217 · January 2022

I just looked up the stroller wagon and you can build-a-wagon like a car lol. My husband is in baby registry heaven right now.

jhysmath · January 2022

@trapperkeeper87 yes we put our 1 year old for a nap in it when we were at an amusement park. It was perfect.

trapperkeeper87 · January 2022

laj0217 said:

I just looked up the stroller wagon and you can build-a-wagon like a car lol. My husband is in baby registry heaven right now.

That's what we did, on their site. My husband was pumped! 😄 We got it three days later. It came so quickly!

Amphibious22 · January 2022

Okay guys you are really selling this for me. And honestly, even if my son doesn't want to sit in it, it can be great for lugging everything around and for that tired walk out of theme parks at the end of the day. I work at a zoo/theme park, so I'm always checking out the cool kid gear and I won't lie, the wonderfold always catches my eye. But these reviews of the Radio Flyer make it sound pretty dreamy. Maybe it can be the big thing we register for this time around.

Which actually leads into another question. What are your thoughts on registries for second kids? Both my sisters had registries and sprinkles but I know other people who only do that for their first.

whitta1015 · January 2022

@Amphibious22 Good question! I'm wondering this too. Around here, people typically do them if they're having a different gender, or if it has been quite a few years since their last baby. My LO is 4, so I'm considering doing one, because I feel like my family will want to do a sprinkle, but I also feel super weird about it, so I'm not sure. Would love to hear other people's opinions.

trapperkeeper87 · January 2022

@Amphibious22 I'm going to be doing one at all the places we did last time, but mostly because I want the discounts (and free gifts that come with registering!) and an easy way to keep track of what we want. I am expecting no shower or sprinkle (and honestly prefer to not have either of those because anxiety), but I know for a fact that at least a couple people will ask what we need, and that gives me a place to point them to.

beccaneu · January 2022

@Amphibious22. I’m definitely doing registries for the freebies and discounts. As for having a sprinkle, if someone wants to throw us one I’d be down for something small and casual with no pressure for gifts. I’m not expecting anything though.

magnolia209 · January 2022

@Amphibious22 I’m definitely doing a registry for the free and discounted stuff! We gave away so many things, because we were in a small apartment for most of this time. We moved to a house in September (on September 14, my due date, to be precise!) and now have much more space. But, I’m hoping karma will work out. We generously gave nice stuff away so I’m hoping all of our friends who had babies in 2021 will give us some of their stuff. We had a really nice bijorn bouncer that I’m bummed to have given to a friend, but I’m hoping she’ll pass it back to me! Another friend has a swing that I really want! We kept big things, but need some big things. Luckily we kept the high chair and crib, but do need a new seat cover and new crib mattress. We need a new infant seat and stroller. We have a great changing pad still but need a new cover. So, it’s a mix match of things. I’m not expecting a sprinkle. But, I think having a registry will help keep everything organized and allow us to buy anything we need at a discount. My friend who is now 9 months pregnant with her 2nd, did a spa day instead of a sprinkle. Good idea with Omicron going around. I think I’d like to do something similar. My birthday is in mid-June and on a 3 day weekend. So I think that would be a great time for this!

jhysmath · January 2022

I definitely have the registries for the freebies. Last time I think my mom was the only one to buy stuff off of it (this was for my second). We bought enough to get the Amazon discount off diapers for a year so that was nice. We don't traditionally do anything after the first baby. My cousin did a gender reveal for her 3rd but we'll be team green again, and have everything we need for a newborn. If we have a girl we have everything we need forever.

I'd love a small celebration, but we really don't need anything new and we cloth diaper for most of the time so even a diaper party wouldn't be necessary. I think we go through 4 boxes of diapers a year.

Want a personalized experience?

Ask a STM+ thread

Re: Ask a STM+ thread

Choose Another Board

Search Boards