@starkette@darkrose88@returning_bump_member the Yukon XL is the car my bf has been eyeing for us, hilariously enough! I have no idea how two car seats plus dogs is ever going to work without towing somebody around lol
The idea of multiples scares me, too. I can’t imagine having to give birth more than once in the same time span!
I've told my 2 best friends, my H, my old BMB group and I texted my OB. We will be telling our families very shortly, as it would be a dead giveaway with me not drinking at any family function. Trying to come up with a clever idea. I like the scratchers idea! I wonder if I could get them in 2 days??
TTC History:
Me: 36 H: 40 Married 2015. Together since 2010. TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017 BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018. TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020 Due date was Nov 2020 DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma. TTC: March 2021 IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022 IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
We haven’t told anyone yet and are planning to wait closer to 14-16 weeks. After a MC earlier in the year, we decided waiting was best for us. Halfway there and I think we can keep the secret, fingers crossed.
My husband and I made a deal that we could each tell one friend. We haven’t told anyone else yet and it’s so hard to keep the secret! I have to tell my principal once we’re back at school after the new year- I really would rather not get sent home because of pregnancy symptoms getting mixed up with Covid symptoms. Other than that we’re waiting to tell until after our first appointment in late January. By then we’ll have heard the heartbeat and have photos to share.
I would love to be able to keep it secret until 14-16 weeks but it's my third kid and the maternity clothes will need to come out this weekend. My first appointment is Tuesday so after that we're going to tell the kids. I don't want to tell anybody else before we tell them.
We’ve told our parents and siblings and I’ve told a few friends. I’m not sure when we’ll tell more people. Probably a few more after our second scan next Friday but we’ll see. I will likely have to tell my business partners soon depending on how I’m feeling.
My mother has known for quite some time. My partner knows and we just told his parents today after my appointment. I won’t be telling many others until my 2nd US which is in February and closer to 2nd trimester
My husband, sister, my husband's best friend, father-in-law and aunt-in-law know. I feel that's a lot of people for just 5 weeks, but they've been the most supportive of our infertility struggle through the years. We'll tell a friend couple after the first scan as they're local. Everyone else will probably find out in mid-February. We haven't thought of how to announce yet, but we have time to figure it out.
@wisewitch222@paytonpedro Same. Already dragged the maternity box out of storage at 6 weeks. I haven’t worn anything in there yet, but any kind of real waistband is going to be a dealbreaker for me very shortly 😂
We haven't told anyone. This is our first, and I'm just scared something will go wrong! Had an ultrasound on Sunday and measured at 8 weeks and will have my first OB appointment next week. I honestly kinda want to wait until 12 weeks, or when a genetic panel is done (don't have any known risks besides age, though).
@onlygooddays08 That's definitely a normal reaction. ***TW loss*** I had an early loss before this pregnancy and only MH and my BFF knew I was pregnant. But after my loss, I told my family because it felt weird going through it silently. Plus they were coming for a visit and I didn't want to pretend like I was okay yet. My mom was sad I hadn't even told her I was pregnant even though I was only like 6/7 weeks. END TW*** It's totally up to you, how you handle it. Everyone is different. But I'd rather have my immediate family surrounding me with support than pretending everything is fine.
we are still trying to process this pregnancy lol. It’s our fourth. We’ve always planned and never thought we’d have a “whoops.” I was just starting to get rid of baby stuff and emotionally accepting being done and even planning to get my husband fixed in the new year…. So I’m not ready to have all the questions and conversations about being pregnant again yet. Hubby knows of course but he’s the only one I want to talk about it with just yet. This baby is a blessing and so loved already of course! But the shock hasn’t worn off yet. I have been bouncing around ideas of ways to tell but I still am really not ready! It is hard to explain to my kids why mommy isn’t feeling good and sleeping all the time right now tho😝
So far, we may have told too many people already. Hahaha! We told my in-laws, my aunt and uncle (who are like my parents. my parents have passed away), my best friend, and my closest cousin who is like a sister. That's it. But it oddly feels like a lot of people, yet I want to yell it from the rooftop. Hahaha!
We've told my parents, in laws, my sister and my two best friends. I prefer people to know, because I've had so many losses. I like the support. And this time took us a pretty long time, so I wanted to chat about it!
No one knows in our family. Just me and MH know. We found out just before Christmas and we want to wait until the 10th - 12th week to tell everyone. In the past, we have told our parents and my sister first, right after our first Appointment and told them not to spread the news until we were ready to. However, my in-laws started telling everyone right away, we know because we were getting lots of "congrats" texts from there sides of the family. So with this being baby number 4 (and possibly our last one) for us we are going to do things differently. We are going to keep it to ourselves until our youngest's 2nd birthday party coming up feb.5. We will tell my mom (my dad passed 5 years ago) and my sister at the end of January and then tell my husbands parents right before the party. I have a cute picture announcement picture off of etsy I am going to have at the party and see how it goes. I have picture idea to do with the kids using signs saying "been there", "done that", "now its my turn to be a big sister" to give to my mom, sister and in-laws.
I told my kids after the appointment on Tuesday. Then they proceeded to tell everybody, so I think all of the first grade and 3 year old preschool at their school knows. Then they told my parents today, so my husband called his dad and told him, and now we’re done telling. And now my poor brother can be relieved of the pressure of being the only one who knows since Christmas Eve. 😂😂😂
Well my mom guessed after a week vacation and just bluntly asked Saturday in the airport on the way home. LOL poor kid #2 already getting off to the whole nothing special trend.
At this point, I'm starting to wonder who doesn't know on my side of the family. I asked my mom to keep if a secret, but she's told two of her sisters, my brother and my cousin. I wouldn't be surprised if she's told more and I just haven't found out. 🙄
The only person we’ve told is my mom. We talk on the phone every day anyway, and it’s nice to have someone to talk to when she can “sneak away” from my dad without being suspicious. She won’t tell anyone, so long as she can keep my individual text thread and the family group text separate! She has gotten close a couple times but it’s luckily been unrelated conversation and she just ended it with three purple heart emojis, which I told her they will just think mean the three grandbabies. To help her I think I’m just going to reply to stuff in there for a while instead of initiating. She’s not great with technology and I know she’d be heartbroken if she accidentally shared our news before we were ready.
@darkrose88 that is so irritating. I would be petty and not tell her the sex, or let her hear it from some one else. It makes me so bad when people can’t respect boundaries.
At this point, my kids, mil, cousin, dad and aunt know- long with my sons class and teachers. Lol. I still have sooooo many people to tell. I’m thinking, my sister asked me to covid test before her sons birthday in a couple weeks, so I’m going to tell her I tested positive and send her a picture of a pregnancy test. Lol. But as for my mom, my grandma, all my other family- I really have no idea. It’s hard because winter + covid = we really never see each other. And I’d rather tell people in person.
@darkrose88 I'm sorry, that's so frustrating. My MIL did that our first pregnancy even though we explicitly said to keep it a secret, so now she's the last to know.
I told my sister a few days before my first appointment because I was feeling nervous and wanted to be able to talk to her about it. My FIL came to visit the night after that appointment, so dh told him (with my blessing). And we told my parents a few days later. I told them we had something to share with them but because of increased delivery times it would take about 7 months to arrive! I then asked how they felt about having a prime number of descendants (they'll have 19 including children and grandchildren and this LO).
We're planning to tell our kids soon and then it'll be pretty much open.
@geshem@maggiemadeit@paytonpedro thanks for the support ladies. DH is furious with her, but I thought maybe he was over reacting. I'm sort of used to my mom pushing the boundaries a little bit.
@paytonpedro my mom would freaking lose it if she found out the sex from someone else. When I go no contact with the outside world for a day or two (for mental health reasons), she assumes something is wrong. I have to warn her in advance because we generally talk daily.
So at think point, most of our immediate family knows, my work, and my sons whole school. Lol. Basically I just have to tell my grandma and aunt and uncle (&cousins) and mh has to tell his grandma and brother.
My mom knows who told my dad because he kept bugging her about me skipping some family events.
Question for those working moms out there, when did you tell your boss and coworkers? I'm an engineer and work from home, but I'm on call a lot because my projects are 24/7 operations. Meaning when I go on mat leave (4 months at my company), someone else is going to need to pick up the calls. Since it's going to be the summer, I hate to leave my team in a bind if a lot of people are also taking vacation at the same time.
@emilim821 I just told my boss last week at 9+a couple days because there was a covid outbreak and I didnt want to be exposed. Spoiler, I got covid that same day anyways and not from work. Merp. Only my supervisor and one other supervisor know currently.
@emilim821 I don’t have that issue now but when I did work while pregnant prior I told my employer once I was comfortable with anybody knowing. It was sometime in the second trimester when I felt more comfortable with being pregnant. On the other hand I have a friend with a similarly important job as to you and she told them very early.
@emilim821 I waited as long as I could both times. With my first I was a grad student and I had heard some horror stories about my advisor kicking a pregnant student out of the lab. I had no choice but to tell her at 14 weeks when she asked me to do an experiment using an infectious agent that is a big pregnancy no-no. With my second I was working remotely from the US for an EU company, and I told my boss at 15/16 weeks, right before I flew to the Amsterdam office, because I didn’t want to walk in all “surprise! I’m pregnant!” I stressed about it both times, and both times it turned out just fine.
A little side story: my EU colleagues were appalled that in the US 1) we only get 12 weeks of leave 2) we work up until the baby comes, and 3) a large part of leave would be unpaid. When I returned from my leave my boss gave me a bonus in the exact amount of the income I missed out on during unpaid leave. I still miss them and that job a lot ❤️
@emilim821 I am 10w tomorrow and planning on telling my business partners this upcoming week. We’re in the middle of launching a new company and have some big projects about to kick off so I kinda feel like they need to know sooner rather than later. After that, I’ll tell our one other employee so she’s not the only one in the dark, and that’s probably it until the second trimester.
I’m telling my boss this week at work only because he has to start making the schedule for fall and I need to tell him I can’t teach that semester. If it weren’t time-sensitive I’d wait until after the first trimester, which is what I did the first two times.
I’m dreading telling my boss because I'm sure it’ll stress her out. We’re a tiny company, there’s only 6 of us and I do community occupational therapy so it’s not something I can do remotely. Chances are we’re going to have to hire someone to fill in for me so I know I should tell her sooner than later because last time we needed help it took 4 months to fill the position.
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
Thanks all for the advice and sharing your stories! @paytonpedro sorry to hear about the COVID @maggiemadeit It's definitely crazy the discrepancy between EU and US wrt family leave - sounds like you had an awesome boss 2nd time around
Re: Who have you told?
TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017
BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018.
TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020
Due date was Nov 2020
DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma.
TTC: March 2021
IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN
IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP. MC Jan 2022
IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN
IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN
AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.
@paytonpedro that's a funny idea!
I told my sister a few days before my first appointment because I was feeling nervous and wanted to be able to talk to her about it. My FIL came to visit the night after that appointment, so dh told him (with my blessing). And we told my parents a few days later. I told them we had something to share with them but because of increased delivery times it would take about 7 months to arrive! I then asked how they felt about having a prime number of descendants (they'll have 19 including children and grandchildren and this LO).
We're planning to tell our kids soon and then it'll be pretty much open.
@paytonpedro my mom would freaking lose it if she found out the sex from someone else. When I go no contact with the outside world for a day or two (for mental health reasons), she assumes something is wrong. I have to warn her in advance because we generally talk daily.
Question for those working moms out there, when did you tell your boss and coworkers? I'm an engineer and work from home, but I'm on call a lot because my projects are 24/7 operations. Meaning when I go on mat leave (4 months at my company), someone else is going to need to pick up the calls. Since it's going to be the summer, I hate to leave my team in a bind if a lot of people are also taking vacation at the same time.
A little side story: my EU colleagues were appalled that in the US 1) we only get 12 weeks of leave 2) we work up until the baby comes, and 3) a large part of leave would be unpaid. When I returned from my leave my boss gave me a bonus in the exact amount of the income I missed out on during unpaid leave. I still miss them and that job a lot ❤️
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
@paytonpedro sorry to hear about the COVID
@maggiemadeit It's definitely crazy the discrepancy between EU and US wrt family leave - sounds like you had an awesome boss 2nd time around