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August 2022 Moms
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Who have you told?

starkettestarkette member
edited December 2021 in August 2022 Moms
Okay ladies, I know our SO's probably all know but what about other family or friends?

Since we got pregnant so close to Christmas (still amazed) are you doing anything special?

I told my best friend immediately. Texted her I peed on a stick and together we waited. Then I sent her a pic of my positive test. 

MH knows too but that's it.

I ordered some cute custom Christmas scratchers off Etsy for my parents, sister, and in-laws. We have a tradition of giving each other meaningful Christmas cards every year. So I thought I'd slip the scratchers in with them and see everyone's faces. Sadly, my in-laws will be in a different state. But I'm gonna send them cards and strict instructions not to open until Christmas day. Since this will be baby #3 I didn't want to do anything too elaborate and think this is perfect for us.

So! What are you gonna do? Have you thought about it yet? 
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Re: Who have you told?

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  • paytonpedropaytonpedro member
    @EmilyE13 your sisters reaction to #3 has me slightly worried. Lol. 😅

    Only mh knows so far. I want to see a heartbeat before I tell anyone.
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  • and_peggyand_peggy member
    Just my husband and 1 friend from another bump group. I don’t want to tell any family or friends officially until after 13 weeks (it’s a mind game after a loss, and I don’t think I’ll relax until I pass the d&c date). I won’t do an announcement until after 20 weeks, if at all. 
    Pregnancy Ticker

    5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
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  • and_peggyand_peggy member
    edited December 2021
    @paytonpedro fwiw, this will be baby 5 and my oldest will turn 6 in May. I can absolutely reassure you that going from 2-3 was really not bad like people say. I have had difficult babies and really strong personalities now, and I still think going from no kids to 1 was my hardest.

    Having more kids does require more planning and routine. I’m a very go with the flow mom but I don’t compromise on bedtimes, and their general routine. But honestly, don’t stress, you will be fine.
    Pregnancy Ticker

    5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
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  • EmilyE13EmilyE13 member
    @and_peggy I appreciate the reassurance! 
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  • paytonpedropaytonpedro member
    @and_peggy thank you for that reassurance! I think for me, going from 1 to 2 was harder than 0 to 1. But my first was an extremely easy baby and my second is…uh… very strong willed. I’m trying to keep with the mind set, “what’s one more” at this point and I’m not really super worried. Yet. Lol
    My oldest will be 6 in February and it blows my mind how quickly it’s gone by!
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  • and_peggyand_peggy member
    @paytonpedro I was sure I was done at 4 but of course our 4th has been super chill so yeah I’m definitely of the mindset - “what’s one more?” 😆
    Pregnancy Ticker

    5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
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  • darkrose88darkrose88 member
    @paytonpedro my one and only is very strong willed, so I'm keeping my FX that the second will be more chill and it won't be as challenging. But knowing my luck that probably won't be the case.  :D

    So I know it is super early to be telling people, but my parents, siblings, two close friends and my previous BMB group knows. I won't be telling anyone else probably until the 2nd trimester but I chose to tell the above people for emotional support if things don't end well. I'm also going on vacation with my family at the end of December, so they would have found out then anyway. I'm going to let DH decide when we tell his side of the family.
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  • ereyln608ereyln608 member
    We haven’t told anyone yet. We thought it would be fun to tell our kids Christmas morning, but we just found out my husband brother and sister in law will be in town and staying with us and they will be there Christmas morning, they’ve been married 16yrs and haven’t been able to have kids, and this will be our 6th, so I feel like it would be really insensitive to do that. But it’s still our house and our kids on Christmas morning, so maybe they will sleep in a little and we can surprise the kids before they get up? 
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  • geshemgeshem member
    @paytonpedro I also thought going from 1-2 was harder than 0-1, our first was a super chill baby and our second... not as much! But then again, now that they're older, our first has a lot of trouble with school/socializing, and our second has taken to it like a duck to water! Who knows what the 3rd will be like?

    No one knows except me and DH, and it will stay that way until at least we hear a heartbeat. DH is very close with his father and probably won't want to wait too long to tell, but I know as soon as we tell his parents we'll have told the whole world... from past experience 🙁 If it didn't feel hypocritical, I'd tell my big sister right away, but it wouldn't feel fair while not telling his parents, so I'll wait.

    @msspoon12 congratulations! My birthday is in February too :smile:
    Pregnancy Ticker Lilypie Maternity tickers
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  • becks105becks105 member
    @geshem lol that scares me! For the most part, my daughter has been an easy baby and toddler. She’s always slept great, however nutrition was always a struggle. She’s always been in the 1st or 2nd percentile, and had a milk allergy so it’s been hard getting her to gain weight. We still go to the ped every three months for weight checks. Maybe this next baby will be a chunk!
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  • lily855lily855 member
    Hello everyone, I'm a bit scared myself. I got a positive in September of this year and I told the 2 people that I thought would be happy for me, they acted happy then I took another test and it was negative I guess it was a chemical pregnancy and those 2 people were relieved telling me I already have too many kids. So this time I'm not telling anyone just yet. My husband knows and you guys and soon my Dr. I will probably say something on my second trimester. Congratulations everyone that is expecting, and good luck to those still trying. I hope we all have healthy pregnancy and healthy babies 🥰💖
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  • lmaplejclmaplejc member
    Besides my H, my first BMB group knows.  I also told one of my best friends yesterday who lives across the country and will be discreet.  I’m waiting until the first scan to tell my parents and MIL.  My mom is so high anxiety and will be filled with worry so I may even wait a bit longer to tell her 😅
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  • darkrose88darkrose88 member
    @lily855 wow I can't imagine how hurt you must have felt by those 2 people's reactions. I'd be very upset if someone told me that. I'm so sorry. 
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  • starkettestarkette member
    @lily855 wow, people really need to be careful with their reactions to that kind of thing. Talk about insensitive. :( It's not really their business how many kids other people have. I'm sorry you have to deal with that. 
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  • lily855lily855 member
    @darkrose88 and @starkette thank you so much, and yes I felt heartbroken I thought they were really being supportive. Now I just feel alone, I know I have my husband and he incredible and I also have my other kids. It's not the same sometimes you need that friend or family member, I just need to get through my head that not everyone is genuine.
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  • becks105becks105 member
    @lily855 so sorry you had that experience. What an awful thing to say. And I promise here, you’ll be greeted by so many supportive women who will build you up and help you to not feel so alone. We’re all thrilled to have you here!
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  • adcc43adcc43 member
    We told my mom and sister so far.  We are waiting after the first appointment to let my 3 kids know about their new sibling.  We hope to tell them on the beach during our winter vacation.  The rest of the family we will tell at the end of January.  I am going to have my youngest wear a big bro tshirt during a party we are planning to have.  

     

     

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     

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  • andrea3oandrea3o member
    edited December 2021
    I am having my second baby, my first with my current partner. It’s a surprise pregnancy for us and we are very grateful and excited! 

    I have primary custody of my DD (4 in February) and co-parent with her dad. It’s been good but frustrating as he is not consistently reliable. This baby will help bring some much needed reality I think to him because he has told me recently that he doesn’t understand why we are not still together… after o almost three years apart.

    My boyfriend is so nervous in an adorable, endearing way. He is presently fixated on the new car we will need to fit us, two car seats, and our 60 lbs dog!
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  • andrea3oandrea3o member
    @starkette  Wow, that’s a lot to process. My first thoughts are I’m sorry for your miscarriage 💛 and how awesome that you have done the hard work of getting healthy for you and now, your baby 💗 Go, mama!
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  • starkettestarkette member
    @andrea3o thanks <3 yea my history with pregnancy is all over the place. Definitely considered high risk, but I feel like I'm in a good place this time. Really hoping for things to be different this time. My first pregnancy was pretty normal until I got preeclampsia at 38 weeks, but at least she was full term. Then I got preeclampsia again with my second at 23 weeks. Crossing fingers I avoid it this time completely.
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  • leahrnmomleahrnmom member
    The scratchers are cute! I'm not sure if I want to tell my family on Thanksgiving. My h knows, my mom, my best friend, my sister, and I posted iy on my FB group of tbjan17.
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  • darkrose88darkrose88 member
    @andrea3o we are having the exact same thoughts around a new car! We've got an almost 4yo and a 100lbs dog and both of us are like, yeah, our little cars aren't going to work for road trips with an additional car seat.  
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  • starkettestarkette member
    @andrea3o and @darkrose88 oh dang it, we should probably get a new car even though we just got one over the summer. It's a chevy equinox though (small SUV) and can't fit three kids. We'll need something to fit a toddler carseat, a baby car seat, and my oldest's booster. Plus, pets occasionally and plenty of space for luggage and such. Our parents live far away and we do road trips often to see them. Definitely need a big enough storage space. 
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  • returning_bump_memberreturning_bump_member member
    @starkette my dad just rented a 2021 Yukon XL for a family roadtrip and it fit 5 adults, an 80 lb dog who was recovering from surgery in the 3 rows. And in the trunk... a full Thanksgiving dinner, dessert, a side table, and 4' diameter Christmas wreath with space to spare in the trunk. 

    I'm not a salesperson, I swear. Just super in love with the vehicle. If we didn't just pay off my durango, I'd convince my husband we need one. 
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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  • darkrose88darkrose88 member
    @starkette ugh, that's unfortunate you just bought a new car! But I 100% get where you're coming from. No way could we fit 3 car seats in my honda civic. It is just too small!
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  • grayceeemae021321grayceeemae021321 member
    This is my first time. I’ve told my SO and then I’ve told my core team at work- I work in a high stress and physical environment and needed to be clear about my change in approach to some things. I’m only four weeks and already stressed that too many people know. I really wanna tell our immediate families for Christmas. I’m notorious for not being about keep secrets from my mother, so I know I need to tell them sooner rather than later. Does anyone have an clever ideas on how to tell them? This is all so stressful.
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  • starkettestarkette member
    @daffodil_shoe that's so exciting! I bet the dad's are over the moon! Is there a possibility for twins? 

    @darkrose88 tell me about it, super aggravating especially since we really like our new car and can't afford two large monthly car payments. I won't worry about it until later, though. For now, we can survive with the small SUV and sedan, at least for a while after baby is born, I think.

    @grayceeemae021321 Here are the two ways I told my family before: I gave my dad a present the day before his major surgery (triple bypass) with a onesie inside that said "worth the wait". My dad was clueless but my mom and sister gasped so loudly and then cried. Finally, my mom was like "Ed! She's pregnant! That's a baby onesie." And he was VERY happy about having his first grandchild. 

    The second time, I got a photo of the first ultrasound and copied it like 5 times (my parents, my in-laws, and my sister) then got small frames from the dollar store and metallic paint pens and wrote "Baby Stark #2 Coming January 2019" around the frame. Then I wrapped them individually and gave it to them during a special family dinner we had. The pretense was "Nova (my daughter) wanted to give you all a special present" they don't question things when my daughter is involved.

    This time I'm doing Christmas themed scratchers and the last one at the bottom says "Jingle Bells Baby #3 Due August '22" 
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  • daffodil_shoedaffodil_shoe member
    @starkette only if the embryo splits 😉 I was very firm that I would only ever do a single embryo transfer, and it’s something we agreed on in our contract. I work in L&D and I see the added risks of multiples, for pregnant person and babies, on a weekly basis. I have no desire to do that to myself, babies, or the dads!
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  • starkettestarkette member
    @daffodil_shoe that makes sense! Yea I am considered high risk and the idea of twins is really scary for me. I definitely understand.
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  • daffodil_shoedaffodil_shoe member
    @starkette I’m getting to know everyone here, are you the one I saw that had a 23 weeker?
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  • starkettestarkette member
    @daffodil_shoe yup! It was an experience. She's doing great, though.
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  • daffodil_shoedaffodil_shoe member
    @starkette that is honestly amazing
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  • becks105becks105 member
    @darkrose88 I traded my civic in for a VW Atlas in April! I’m obsessed with it. Anyone looking for mom car advice should check out The Car Mom on Instagram!!! She demos all kinds of cars and reviews them for all the features for moms with Littles 
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