Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
surrenderdorothy
member
Re: Randoms- 3/8
TW- child abuse and sexual abuse mentioned in the context of a documentary.
In related/unrelated news- my very smart, movie watching, comedy reading husband had no clue who Woody Allen is. He looked at me like I had two heads when I explained what I was watching.
@BourbonBiscuits let me keno when you watch it so we can discuss!
Speaking of shows... Sister Wives is (I'm embarrassed to admit) one of my recent guilty pleasures. Anyone else watch it?
@mrspants0809 yessss please watch so we can discuss! I am one episode behind but will be caught up in the next day or so. (I watch in my iPad with headphones while I do housework... this is my pandemic "me" time strategy that is a holdover.) If you hate Kody this season does not do him any favors. I also can't stand Meri- I think she is so entitled. Can't wait to discuss!
Random: has anyone watched the Meghan Markle interview? I have thoughts and need to discuss them!
ETA- hit enter too soon. We got our cabinets refinished. They look great however the fumes from the finish are making me so sick. My husband can’t smell them but I’ve had the windows open and ceiling fans cranked since 3pm and it is still giving me a headache and making me nauseous.
Tomorrow I will year my car apart but I clearly remember having it in my hand. When I went to go into the lab I couldn't find it.
I'm really hoping it just slid somewhere in my car
I will fully admit that I have most likely been a victim of the smear-campaign that has been launched against her since the beginning, because I have never been a fan. I am also weirdly obsessed with royal family and have always LOVED William/Kate/Harry. Not so much the older generation. So, let me preface my thoughts with those admissions.
That being said, I was horrified by the things she had to say. Namely the "concerns" that members of the royal family (I'm placing bets that it was Charles) had about Archie's potential "skin color" (honestly, it makes me sick to even type that out). All of the mental health struggles she had (and were ignored). How her son was denied a title and security. Like, honestly, it all makes me SO MAD for them. And if it's all true, I can completely understand why they left. And freaking applaud them for it.
BUT...then the other side of me (that weirdly loyal side) was analyzing every word that came out of her mouth. And questioning her sincerity. And getting upset that she would DARE to malign Kate (ridiculous, I know!).
WHY do I have so much energy over this entire thing? DH is getting annoyed that I have SO MUCH to say about it all! He keeps asking, "why do you even care about this?" I never follow celebrity ANYTHING, so it's a valid question. But, like I said...weirdly obsessed!
All that being said, politically I'm against the monarchy and overall I think it'd be for the best if it just disappeared tomorrow. But I totally know what you mean about it being weirdly compelling to follow them! It's not even like they are that glamorous, compared to many American celebrities and rich people... it's just like, fascinating to think about what it'd be like in their shoes, with all that privilege but all those constraints.
Luckily I just have one cc in there and my ID. I've set up alerts for my card just in case but I'm holding out hope that it's somewhere weird in my house
@the_most_happy, I think that's where I'm at too. Nothing about the whole situation is black and white. It doesn't have to be "Team Kate" or "Team Meghan." They're both human and therefore flawed. And while I don't think MM is entirely sincere, that doesn't mean that she wasn't treated horribly.
@claireloSC, yeah...NOT a fan of Charles. I love royal history, but the contemporary royal family has probably worn out its welcome!
Anyways, thanks everyone for entertaining my weird investment in this whole saga!
I think he’s having a midlife crisis because it seems like none of the wives want to have more kids and he can’t stop wanting more.