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April 2021 Moms
kadeephd
member
STM(+) Birth Stories
kadeephd
member
I saw this on the Reddit bump group for April (which I occassionally stalk but don't participate in) and thought it would be fun to share here.
Re: STM(+) Birth Stories
I woke up on a Monday morning (39 + 3) and started having light contractions right away. They were space relatively far apart and were not intense. My husband went to work since we figured it could be a while. I spent the day going on walks and just hanging out at home while the contractions gradually got more intense and closer together. He came a bit early because I was in more serious pain aroun 3pm. I spent a lot of time bouncing on a ball and watching Muppet Christmas Carol (well, it was playing in the background anyway). The contractions were quite intense and getting close together, so we called my OB and they had us go to the hospital. We got there around 5:30. When they checked me, I was only 2cm dilated and maybe 50% effaced (I can't remember the exact effacement). I was super discouraged because I felt like I'd been having serious contractions for qutie a while and there was very little to show for it. They had me walk around for an hour (lots of screaming and holding onto walls) and checked again, no progress. They sent us home. My husband had left the car lights on or something and the battery died in the hospital parking lot! So we had to take an uber home. That poor uber driver. Luckily it took less than 10 minutes so I only had 3 or so contractions. We got home and I took a bath. I was in a lot of pain and having trouble managing it. I started vomiting frequently as well. I called my SIL (who is an OB) and she told us to go back to the hospital (we took our other car). I think we were home for less than an hour. When we got back to the hospital, I was 5cm dilated and fully effaced. This was probably around 8 or 9. They admitted me and asked if I wanted an epidural. I had hoped to avoid it so I said I would try for a while on my own, but I should have just said yes! I ended up wanting the epidural, and had to wait quite a while to get it. I think I finally got it around 11:30. After that things were much more relaxed. I was about 6.5 cm and was fully dilated around 5:30 or so am. They had me switching back and forth between sides with that thing between my legs. My husband napped but I was too amped up to sleep, though I could have with the pain relief. They did give me pitocin during this time because I wasn't progressing on my own very much. Once I was fully dilated, I pushed for maybe 15 minutes and my son was born at 6:01 am. He was 6 lbs 9 oz an 20.5 inches long.
ETA: One thing that surprised me was the fact that there was a monitor for my contractions and I could also see the one for the woman in the hospital room next to mine. The nurses in my room were resposnible for her so they had access to both. This was somewhat frustrating/discouraging for me because the woman in the next room was having these regular contractions, spaced apart pretty evenly, and mine were just coming one after another with what felt like no breaks. I remember demanding the nurse tell me why they lied to me about getting breaks between contractions and why the woman next door was getting breaks and I wasn't. This was before the epidural.
With my first I'd had zero braxton hicks except when walking/running so I woke up with contractions at 39+5 and new it was it (had been 0cm dilated at my appointment the previous day). They were pretty spaced out. We went for a walk in the early evening and things picked up. I jumped from 7mins apart to 5 mins quickly and called my OB. She said to wait until they've been 5 mins apart for an hour so we set up scrabble and I went to sit on a big exercise ball and my water broke. It must have been on the side, not the bottom, because my pants were soaked but nothing was on the floor. I quickly changed and more leaked the next contraction. I could see it was tinged brown which meant meconium. We had purchased puppy pads for this exact reason and I sat on them in the car. We got settled in at the hospital (I was 5cm) and they asked if I wanted an epidural. I said I could wait longer but they told me the anesthesiologist was free now but had a surgery soon so it could be 2+hrs before I could get it so I went for it. It was great to get to nap some. It was about 10pm and we both slept. I woke up around 4am and could feel some pain so the nurse had me push for more epidural meds and THEN checked me and and I was 10cm. In hindsight, I should have been able to feel that as I was going through transition and I think the extra meds weren't great. They thought baby was coming quickly but then I slowed down. Only every other contraction was strong so it took a bit longer. They had prepped me for 2-4hrs of pushing and it took 1.5hrs (so not as fast as kadeephd but still quick and I only pushed every other contraction). The cord was wrapped around her neck but the OB had that under control. There were about 10 ppl in the room (mostly nurses plus my OB) b/c of the meconium, I think. It's not super common, but the placenta actually came out at the same time as she did so I didn't have to deliver it separately. They had to take her to clean her up and clean out her airway (bedside so she didn't leave the room). DH got to cut the cord but we couldn't do delayed cord clamping. They brought her to me as soon as she was cleaned up.
With #2 I was GBS+. I had so much braxton hicks I probably timed contractions a dozen different times but they were never consistent or progressed into anything. My induction was scheduled for 40+5. At 40+4 (our wedding anniversary) I woke up with contractions at 3am. Again, they were inconsistent but definitely stronger. I'd been walking around at 2cm dilated for almost 3 weeks. Since I was GBS+, I needed to make sure to get to the hospital with at least 4hrs before the birth to get IV antibiotics so I called the OB at 4pm. They said to go in which DH said he knew would happen but I had just been hoping for more guidance on what to do with the inconsistent contractions. We took our time but made our way over (the OB's office called them to tell them I was coming). They checked me and I was only 4cm (so some progress) and had me walk around for an hour. I got to 5cm so they admitted me and started the antibiotics. This was maybe 7pm? I then proceeded to not progress any further for 4hrs. I declined pitocin a few times (didn't want an anniversary baby). I got potocin at 1am. I'd said I wanted the epidural before potocin but the nurse said I'd be fine. I got it at a 2 (So very low) for 10 mins and my contractions became so intense they turned it off and I progressed quickly from there. Technically I had augmented labor, not an induction, which is probably why it took so quickly. I got the epidural and we tried to sleep but the baby's HR dropped with each contraction which I guess can be normal when they're super strong so it wasn't super concerning - but they came in at almost every contraction to check her. They checked my progrees pretty routinely, too, and 3hrs after the potocin I delivered. Baby would have come out in 2 contractions (4 pushes) but I had to stop to wait for the OB to finish washing her hands. She came on the first push on the next contraction. We did delayed cord clamping and she got to go right on my chest. Since she came pretty fast she apparently nicked a blood vessel and I had a vulvar hematoma which required surgery after her delivery. She was born around 4am and I had surgery at 8am. But that is a story for a different thread. Long story short, it's super rare, my OB had only seen that happen twice. They cut the hematoma open and drained it out which took about an hour. I had a catheter for a week and sat in a donut pillow for 2 weeks.
DD1 was due 7/27/14 and on 7/26 I had a constant backache. Nothing that felt like contractions, but my back hurt and it wrapped around to my belly every now and then. I called my OB that afternoon and she said I should go ahead and go in to the hospital so they could determine if I was having back labor. We went and it turned out I was in labor, but not enough to stay. They sent me home and said they’d probably see me later that night. We left and went through the drive through at McDonald’s and while we were in line, real labor contractions hit. We went home and I sat in the bath for a while, then got up to walk because it was starting to hurt too badly. Poor DH was like, shouldn’t we go back in? And I was like “IT HASN’T BEEN CONSISTENT FOR LONG ENOUGH YET, I’M NOT GETTING SENT HOME AGAIN” 😂 It was around 11:30 or so and he got in bed. I was like “what are you doing?! It’s time to go!” Again - poor guy. We got there at midnight and were admitted. I was given an epidural, slept off and on, and she was born shortly after 4 am after 20 minutes or so of pushing. My water didn’t break until right before I started pushing. So she was born on her due date, which happened to be a Sunday. DH was supposed to preach that day - the rest of the church staff was on a trip that he didn’t go on since it was over our due date. He had to call in a backup preacher, because of course the pastor’s kid was born early on Sunday morning!
With DD2, DH - once again - had a commitment at church. Her due date was 12/24/16, and we had a kid’s Christmas play on 12/11. He said “just don’t have her before the play, I have to be there.” So we made it through the play and as I was getting in bed that night, pretty much exactly at midnight, my water broke. I wasn’t entirely sure what was happening because I hadn’t experienced that with DD1, but when I felt like I was peeing myself and that it was entirely out of my control I figured that’s what it was. I wasn’t having contractions though, so when I called my OB she said to just hang out at home until my contractions became regular. They never did! I slept off and on that night too, and around 9:00 or so that morning we called again. Although my contractions weren’t becoming regular, they were getting stronger, so she said to go ahead in. I actually wasn’t packed yet so had to waddle around and pack right away. We were admitted since my water had in fact broken. We got in the room and I really just laid there because I didn’t feel like I was in labor. They did give me some sort of pain medicine through my IV because my contractions were so strong. It made me feel better, but also kind of like I was high so I didn’t love that. My parents arrived at the hospital and came in the room to say hi before settling in to the waiting room. My mom likes to say that her presence started my labor, because the second they stepped in the room contractions were coming fast and strong. They left as the anesthesiologist arrived to give me my epidural. The epidural was NOT working. I mentioned that to the nurse (this was all within a matter of minutes) so she checked me real quick and she said the epidural wasn’t going to work because the baby was starting to crown. I can still picture my OB running down the hallway towards our room just a minute later, putting on her coat and everything as she was running. So I inadvertently had an epidural-free birth with DD2. I only pushed a couple times and she was out! I think I only felt true labor with her for about an hour or so.
DD1’s labor was much calmer, but DD2 was so much easier to recover from. Since I didn’t have the epidural, I could get up and move and pee pretty soon after she was born. I also didn’t tear with her, and required stitches with DD1. I told DH today that I’ve actually considered going without the epidural on purpose with this one, but I’m afraid that this would be my one hard delivery and then I’d end up regretting it. So I’ll probably go with the epidural still.
DD1 FTM Due Date, June 21...Status 39w5d, Weds.
I'd gotten off work at Best Buy exhausted. I'd been on my feet all day. My back hurt. My head hurt. I was hot, it was 100 outside, and I was just done being pregnant. I had a total meltdown, crying I didn't want to be pregnant anymore!!! I showered, ate something, said good night to my parents, and passed out.
Thursday, June 29, 39w6d...About 4am, my back ache had gotten ridiculously worse. I got up to pee and take a couple of Tylenol, maybe a hot bath. When I wiped, I noticed pink. Bloody show. My back pain was labor. I went back to bed and dozed for a while. At 6am, I told my mom I was having contractions. We agreed she should go to work, and I'd call if it got regular. Hours upon hours later, when she got home from work, we went to the hospital. I was 3cm dilated, and 100% effaced. Except... I'd been 3cm dilated for 3 weeks. I got sent home with orders to walk.
Friday, June 21, 40w0d...At midnight, my contractions were 7m apart, and really strong. We went back to the hospital. I was.... 3cm dilated and 100% effaced. The on call doctor noticed I was severely dehydrated, so she had me drink Gatorade. The charge nurse sent me home with seconal after being rehydrated to help me sleep. At this point, I'd been in labor for 30 hours, and awake for 24. I went home, and crashed out. 8 had these bizarre dreams of being on a roller coaster. Each contraction was a hill... And the hills got bigger and bigger, and the breaks between smaller and smaller. I woke suddenly. I was pretty sure I should go to the hospital, but there was NO WAY IN HELL I WAS BEING SENT HOME AGAIN, so I waited until my mom got up.
She took one look at me and called out. She got dressed, took my sister to school, ate breakfast... She was brushing her teeth when I said, Ow...felt a pop, like a balloon breaking, and a huge WOOSH of fluid. I said, I think my water broke. My mother freaked out. I'm trying to clean up her bed, and she's like WHO CARES ABOUT THE BED!!! WE HAVE TO GO.
The rest is a blur. What I didn't know then, but she did, was that I had just entered transitional labor. She drove like a mad man to the hospital xwhich was luckily about 5 miles away. She dropped me off up front and went to park. I walked in, took one look at the slow elevator, and WALKED UP THE STAIRS. My contractions were on top of each other by this point. I stopped for a particularly nasty one to push. At the moment, a doc came out of L&D and saw me and about freaked out. I smiled and walked into L&D. I was ushered into a room, got my pants off. The Doc said, she's complete!!! CROWNING!!! MOVE MOVE MOVE. They barely got the IV into me. My mom comes stumbling in as they wheel me down the hall. I get into Delivery and three pushes and she's out. 7lbs15oz, 19in long. I spent the rest of the day being an example of what NOT to do with a woman in Active labor who's dehydrated.
Much simpler. I got to the hospital on the morning of May 29, and started the pitocion drip. I'd been walking around at 4-5cm for 5 weeks, so it didn't take much to kick off my labor. The pitocion was turned off after just an hour, and my labor progressed naturally after that. DS was Sunny Side Up, and my labor kind of halted at 6cm, as he navigated a nasty turn. I got an epidural at the advice of the nurse. While it never erased the pain, it did relax me. 45min later, I complained it wasn't working at ALL. The nurse came in, hit the button to dose me and went.... Ohhhhhh. It hurt so bad because I was in transitional labor, and now that I was completely numb, ready to deliver.
I needed help to push, but he was still out in 3 pushes. I had major tearing, with a 3rd degree episiotomy... Again, he was Sunny Side Up, meaning coming out face first instead of crown first. Recovery was long and hard. The damage was bad enough I was treated like a cesarean patient, and had all the same restrictions. I needed them.
We got to the hospital on Jan 20 and checked in. I was GBS+, as well as AMA, Hypertensive, and GD... So, yeah, I was staying. They started the drip, but things were going very, very slowly. My OB started pushing me for an epidural, but after DS1, I wanted to do this naturally. Eventually, tho, DS2 started having decels during contractions. I decided to get the epidural in case we needed to move fast, that was already done.
I fell asleep and woke abiut 45m later to intense pressure. I mentioned it to the nurse, who said she'd check me shortly. The pressure got worse and worse, and I kept mentioning it. I was feeling the pain, too. Strong. Sharp. Nonstop. Then, it shifted and I felt the pressure in my rectum. Great, now I have to poo. Lucky me. I didn't. On the next contraction... I push. And feel DS2 shift into position. I tell the nurse I NEED TO PUSH. She finally decided to check me. 10cm, complete, and crowning. She freaks out, goes to find the oncall OB while the other nurse calls my OB. The oncall is conveniently standing outside my room.
He gets in position, ready to catch, just as my OB bursts through the door. I push... She gets dressed...i push again, she sits down, his head is out with his hand next to it STOP PUSHING, sweetie. I know it hurts. DS2 has his cord in his hand. She pries his fingers free, OK honey, push. He's out... 6lbs8oz and 21.5in.
The epidural had barely lasted. It took me to transition and wore off. I was up and walking around as soon as they removed the catheter. I felt everything. It was a great experience. And, I'll ask for the epidural this time x onky using it to get through the 4 to 6cm part.
Anyway, they got me into L&D and I changed into a johnny and she checked me. I remember the surprised look on her face when she said, "You're fully dilated, bulging sac! You're going to meet your baby soon!" I croaked out a request for an epidural and she told me it was too late to have anything at all. I must have looked frightened because she said, "You just went through labor in your sleep. You're going to be fine." Her vote of confidence really helped me and I remembered all the things I had read in Mindful Birthing and it's true: I was fine. I'm not going to say it didn't hurt and it wasn't intense, but the pain wasn't absolutely constant and if you relax and listen to your body, it floods with feel-good hormones between contractions and there are times when you get to take a break from activity and just rest. It took awhile for DD to descend, so I ended up pushing for 1.5 hours. They acted like that was a long time, but it didn't feel crazy to me. I just took it one contraction at a time. Maybe they thought it would be faster since my labor was so fast. Birth was uneventful with just a second degree tear (again, pretty normal) and she was born at 5:05am at 6lbs,8oz, 5 hours after I woke up in pain.
DD was 12 days late and it was torture, but partly brought on by my own stubbornness. I wanted a med-free, no intervention birth so I refused induction for as long as possible. I ended up having contractions eventually but my water never broke and I finally gave in to the pitocin and epidural after being in labor (painful contractions with little break, throwing up, etc.) for about 30 hours. Even after the pitocin and epidural, it took a while before DD was born. I narrowly escaped a c-section, largely because of the doula we used.
With DS, I was so stupid. I did not hire the doula again and thought it would be fine. Well, 40 weeks rolled around and no signs of anything happening, so I scheduled my induction for 41 weeks. Because it was not emergent, I was bumped for a full day. When I was finally admitted, I started the pitocin and got an epidural a few hours later, but failed to progress and ended up with an emergency c-section. There were some issues with the c-section and it took nearly double the "normal" amount of time, and I ended up having bladder issues and a catheter for 2+ weeks after we were discharged.
Since I had such difficult labors with both previous pregnancies, I am planning for a scheduled c-section this time. I very much hope that by avoiding the trauma of a 36+ hour L&D experience, or a failed induction resulting in emergency CS, my experience this time will be much less traumatic and my recovery will be smoother.
Anyways, so I was 37+3 and blissfully enjoying my maternity leave. For all of 2 days, which I’m still bitter about. It was the best I had felt my whole pregnancy, and I was ready to relax and mentally prepped to be overdue because I was a FTM. No. My water broke around 3am, and even though I wasn’t having contractions I could feel they wanted me to come in. I had been to the doctor the previous day and was 3cm dialated. I showered and took our dogs to the dog sitters and got to the hospital around 6am. They had been wondering where I was, but honestly I wasn’t in a rush since I still didn’t have any contractions. They got me in a room but I delayed pitocin, assuming since my water broke this baby must be ready. Nope. 12 hours later I finally started pitocin and by that evening, maybe 8ish, I was finally feeling pain and wanted my epidural. It was a very long miserable night. DH slept through it all. I had this constant pain in my side and they kept telling me to sleep but I couldn’t through the pain. Contractions are supposed to come and go but it was constant. Finally, the next morning they checked me (for the first time since my doctors appointment two days prior) and they said I was ready to push. I couldn’t feel anything but the pain in my side, so pushing didn’t go well. 3.5 hours into pushing and they mentally prepare me for a vacuum attempt but that it likely won’t work so it’ll be a c-section. Literally a minute after they said that the pain in my side completely disappeared and on the next push I actually got somewhere. So 4 hours total pushing and he was born at 10:23am on Thanksgiving day.
Due date: 11/7/2016. Status: 38W7D
Monday night my husband and I had an apt with my OBGYN to check dilation. I was 1 cm dilated and definitely not in labor. He told me not to walk too much since he didn't want me to induce labor. That very night my husband and I walked from our apartment to get pastor tacos (we were living in Merida, Yucatan, Mexico). We actually ended up walking more than expected and got home at around 10PM. I had been having BH for the past month or so. After getting home I decided to finally write up my birth plan: we were to have a natural water birth with a doula. It took over an hour to write up since I had to translate everything in Spanish and look up medical jargon that wasn't already in my vocab. At around 11:00PM I was exhausted and felt a lot of intense BH (I now realize it was early labor) so I decided to go to bed. It took a while to fall asleep since I was trying to ignore contractions but I did end up drifting off. I woke up to some weird dreams of ocean waves at around 2:00 AM. I felt tons of pressure as though I had to pee so I went to the bathroom and was trying to pee, nothing came out. I then sat on the bed and though I pee'd the bed but it was actually my water braking. Told my OBGYN and he ordered us to get to the hospital.
Got to the hospital at 3:00 AM, contractions started feeling real but still very manageable. Doc checked me and I was just 2cm. He expected the birth to be long (delivery predicted to be at noon) but checked us in since my water broke. The hospital was pleasantly empty and my MIL showed up. DH left to get snacks and water and I spent what felt like eternity laboring with my MIL. Contractions got worse and the only thing I could do is take off my clothes and writhe my body in cat and cow. My MIL tried to be comforting and rub my back but it was kinda awkward since I was naked and gyrating. DH finally got back and I decided to take a shower. My contractions were really intense at this point and I remember sitting down in a chair under the shower in between my contractions and having to stand up and grab the shower walls during contractions. DH made sure I didn't slip. I came out after an hour and they checked me, I was 8 cm, and it was 7:00AM Halloween morning.
They decided to take me to the delivery room next door and let me in the tub. The hospital policy was that you had to wait until you are at least 6 cm to get into the delivery tub. Since my labor was faster than predicted, they just started to fill the tub, and the guy that was filling it had the water scalding. I dipped a toe in and screeched since the tub was my only saving grace at the moment. He looked at me like I was being possessed. I started to freak out as I went into transition and couldn't get in the tub yet since the water was too low and too hot. My doula had arrived as my worst contraction came on. I started screaming and cursing but she told me to calm down and not panic. Sometimes all you need is a reality check. I felt like I had to poo and realized that it was time. They got me into the tub and I immediately relaxed. My doula told me to take short quick exhales to avoid pushing since the urge was so strong and my OBGYN hadn't arrived yet. Doc finally arrived and I was fully dilated. It took about 20 mins of pushing to deliver DD1 at 8:00AM on the dot. I remember the ring of fire feeling when her body came out. I held her for about 30 minutes and then I had to get out of the bath to deliver the placenta and get stitched up.
We spent the next 24 hours in the hospital resting with DD1. I had no issues getting up an walking after birth since I was lucky enough to not need meds. I did bleed for more than a month after birth though.
Due date: 4/14/19 Status: 38 weeks 6 days
Went in for my 36 week birth plan appointment which also included an ultrasound to confirm that my placenta had moved away from the cervix, which it had. They noticed that DD was very small..so they brought me back for another scan at 38 weeks to confirm that she was at least growing along her own growth chart. I go into the appointment (alone) assuming everything would be fine, and turns out she had now fallen below the 10th percentile and off the growth chart. My OB said to go home, eat a good meal, pack up and head to the hospital that evening to be induced in order to get her out and to start feeding her on the outside. I was in shock - and not ready at all. I was 100% expecting to go past my due date, as is typical for so many FTM's. I was nervous to be induced when my body wasn't ready (I was barely 1cm and 0% effaced), and was so scared for a failed induction and need for a C section. My OB made it clear that this was medically necessary for the safety of the baby, and made me call DH from the OB's office to tell him the news so she could fill out the induction order for the hospital.
I spent the next few hours telling work that it would be my last day, trying to tie up loose ends and finish packing my hospital bag. We check into the hospital around 6pm and I got my IV at 7pm. It was a strange feeling to be in the triage room with laboring women while I felt and looked perfectly fine. I mention getting the IV because it was a somewhat traumatic experience....a nursing student did it and it wasn't the smoothest job, as she cheerfully exclaimed "that was my first one!" as I glanced down to bloody towels everywhere while DH ran around the room looking for more towels. I had a vasovagal reaction and the next thing i knew the resident OB and a few other nurses were in the room trying to stabilize my blood pressure. I for sure thought I would never make it through labor & delivery if I couldn't even handle the IV..!!
After the IV incident was behind me, I had a Foley Catheter inserted into my cervix to induce labor (this is a method used when you are basically not ready at all - 0cm and 0% effaced). They gave me some drugs thru my IV to make me loopy to better tolerate the insertion - which was pretty uncomfortable they warned me, and it was - but not painful or unbearable. Just awkward. Once in, they taped it to my leg and said they'd leave it in until I reached about 4/5cm, likely around 1am. Around 11:30 I started having contractions but nothing terrible, just like really bad period cramps. They came in to check me around 1:30am, and I was about 4cm so they removed the catheter and said they'd start pitocin. My water broke while they were removing my catheter - which was a bit painful but quick. They started Pitocin but weirdly my body didn't have a reaction, and my contractions stopped. I tried to sleep but the nurse kept coming in to make me turnover and switch sides, which I thought was too frequent / odd. Around 730am they came in to tell me both that I wasn't progressing on the pitocin, and that the baby's heartbeat kept dipping which is why they kept making me change positions. They stopped the Pitocin to give my body a break. Oddly enough, when they stopped the pitocin I started having my own manageable contractions again, but baby's heartbeat was still dipping. Around 10am the resident midwife and the OB on call came in to talk about the baby's heartbeat and my potential for needing a C section. I remember my eyes welling up with tears, but wanting to do whatever was best and safest for the baby. I remember even asking if they could just wheel me in for a Csection right then and there! They said they would wait a little while longer, but that I should get the epidural now instead of getting put on the anesthesiologists list and potentially having to knock me out for an emergency C if I didn't get it in time. The anesthesiologist came in right away and quickly administered the epidural, which was a sharp pain going in (i imagine that was the needle) but then felt fine and I couldn't feel my legs. They started pitocin again and used a peanut ball in between my legs and had me move from side to side over the next couple of hours. I felt absolutely nothing and I think the peanut ball did wonders because what felt like only an hour or so later, the OB came in to check on me and I was complete! And baby's heartbeat had fully stabilized, so it was time to push. I pushed 3x for 15 mins and she was here! 4lbs 12 oz and all vitals checked out. Perfectly healthy, just tiny. I had a 1st degree tear and got a couple stitches, but physically walked out of the hospital so think my recovery was pretty good. Besides the standard 6 weeks in diapers!
All in all, there were some scary heartbeat complications while being induced but my OB said it was typical of smaller babies so i can't for sure blame that on the induction. And aside from the uncomfortable IV and Foley Catheter insertions, I didn't feel any real contractions like what I thought I would have (as seen in movies..) and had the chillest 15 mins of childbirth, talking about baby names and hair colors with the delivering OB in between pushes.
My OB does a pitocin drip during recovery. It has been shown to reduce the risk of post partum hemorrhage.The downside is the cramping is on par with the mild to moderate labor you'd just been through... And your brain knows it. I'd cringe every time I nursed and the cramping hit. It also meant heavier bleeding for those first 48 hours, but... By day 4, I could wear a normal pad, like Always Infinity, albeit it super. I'd definitely ask your OB about it.
@aisukurimsarang Interesting -- I hadn't heard of that!
Did anyone try perineal stretching or a warm compress during labor to minimize tearing? I had a second degree tear, which I gather is pretty common, but I was seriously so uncomfortable for weeks. I would love to have less damage down there and avoid stitches this time if possible.
My current hospital uses the Pitocin drip after delivery and before the placenta leaves to reduce PPH, they said it was standard practice. Since I wasn't hooked up to an IV for my first birth the OB just gave me a Pitocin injection before delivering the placenta to reduce PPH. This is what most midwives use. If anyone doesn't like IVs I would ask your provider about the possibility of avoiding the IV and just using a Pitocin injection rather than a drip.
Most hospitals mandate IVs during labor so this time around I will be doing the Pitocin drip, and am sure it is going to be fine!
(For background, my husband was flying to Europe for work 6 days after my EDD. I was convinced I would go after my EDD like most FTMs, so I was doing everything I could to try and coax the baby out (mostly sex, pumping, and a membrane sweep)).
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At 38&6 I had my first cervical check and requested to have my membranes swept. I was 1cm, 50% effaced and -2 and the sweep went smoothly. “I give you a 50/50 shot of you going into labor!” my nurse practitioner said excitedly. I told her the baby was very comfortable and I’d be pregnant for two more weeks. I went home, dry pumped, bounced on my exercise ball, and made plans for the long Labor Day weekend with my husband. A few minutes after laying down for the night, I felt a small pop with a gush and ran to the bathroom to confirm that it was baby time!
My husband packed his bags and took the dogs out, while I portioned their meds and meals and searched for a dog sitter on rover who was available on a holiday weekend with no notice. By 9:30pm, we made it to triage. I was having regular contractions, 5 min apart, but not feeling much. I had not progressed since my afternoon appointment that day; however, the resident OB agreed to let me labor naturally initially, with a repeat check at 2am and possible Pitocin then to augment labor.
Around 11:30pm, the nurse came into my room to notify me that my contractions were more irregular and the doctors recommended we start a low dose of pit now. I agreed and also asked for Benadryl to try and sleep through early labor; however, once the Pitocin started, the pain intensified fairly quickly. I tried bouncing on the labor ball, walking, and changing positions without success and requested IV medications. These made me instantly feel loopy and sedated but did little to manage the pain of contractions. My nurse also brought in nitrous oxide, which did exactly nothing. My husband and I labored through the night together, trying to conserve our energy as things seemed to be moving quite slowly; I wanted to progress as much as possible before requesting an epidural and remaining bed-bound thereafter. By 6am, I was only 3cm dilated, exhausted, and ready. After an hour and a half, the anesthesia team appeared and I got my sweet, sweet relief. It was also shift change and I met my favorite L&D nurse, Jessica. As soon as the the epidural took effect, I was out like a light. Jessica set me up with a peanut ball to keep my pelvis open and religiously turned me every hour. My husband and I slept on and off throughout the morning and early afternoon, and I continued to enjoy light fluids orally and a few bites of dried mango and my husband’s lunch. I felt great! By 3pm, I was 10cm dilated, 100% effaced and 0 station. I labored down to a +1. Jessica set up the room for baby and excitedly told me she thought I’d deliver before her shift change at 7pm. I played my meditation music and we started pushing around 4pm.
The OBs soon came in to check on progress and, after a manual exam and bedside ultrasound, notified me that they thought his head was positioned in a way that would make pushing difficult (and had already resulted in swelling on his scalp), but they were optimistic I would have a vaginal delivery. I continued to labor with Jessica and my husband, and by 5:45pm, my husband could see our son’s head with each push (and I have a video of his reaction that makes me sob). My epidural continued to provide excellent pain relief and, with time, allowed for increasing mobility of my legs, so we tried using a birthing bar and I eventually was able to labor on all fours and in the squatting position. As the hours went by, I noticed a slight sense of urgency in the tone of communication between providers in the room. First, we passed the 24 hour mark for premature rupture of membranes but I was assured that baby and I were doing well and would be allowed to continue. Then, we drew closer to the four hour mark of pushing and I could feel my energy and trust in the process slowly fade. With the 7pm shift change, I was introduced to a new L&D nurse who took a much more passive approach to labor. While Jessica provided cheerful counting, positive feedback, and touch cues for pushing, my new nurse seemed somewhat of a passive participant. Luckily my husband jumped right in and did his best to imitate Jessica’s work, monitoring my contractions on the screen and coaching me when and how long to push. I considered for a moment dismissing the nurse from our room but decided against unassisted pushing while they reshuffled staff. Each time the OB team came to check on me, my energy and hope replenished. One resident, in particular, was great at providing feedback on pushing and completed several manual rotations to help move baby to a more optimal birthing position. Each time, he would descend during the push only to return to the +1 station he was in prior to our start. The talk began to shift to options - continuing to labor, considering vacuum assistance, or cesarean - and my anxiety mounted. I pushed with every ounce of my being; stripped completely naked with my eyelids swollen shut and my husband standing quietly at my side. After over four hours of pushing, I sobbed and declared that I was done. The OBs returned to talk me through my options. A vacuum could be attempted but was no guarantee for a vaginal delivery and carried its own risk, including a brain bleed for baby. I could continue to labor as I was until baby showed signs of distress, but no one could clearly visualize the end in sight, or if continued labor would ultimately result in an emergent delivery. I could opt for a cesarean, the number one intervention I had been counseled to avoid by maternal fetal medicine. Since before conception, I had my heart set on a vaginal delivery. I had an extensive abdominal and pelvic surgery with scarring throughout. This was my first baby. We want more. More scar tissue = greater risk for complications. This wasn’t supposed to happen. “What is better for the baby, vacuum or c-section?” I asked the attending. “What does your gut tell you?” she asked me. I had no idea. I was scared and exhausted and just wanted to rewind four hours in time. “I don’t have a gut feeling either way about the vacuum,” she explained. “I don’t want to put him through the stress of a vacuum assist if we are going to end up with a cesarean anyways,” I said. And my decision was made. I asked questions - would I need general anesthesia? No. Could we do skin to skin? Yes. Could I pick up and hold my baby afterwards? Yes. Could I drive him to his appointments? Not for several weeks, particularly if I remained on narcotics. Could I see the baby be born? Yes, through a clear drape. Would I be a candidate for a VBAC in the future? Maybe. Depending on what they found. I was asked if they wanted to follow my previous vertical scar or create a new horizontal scar. “Whichever is less invasive,” I replied. The attending paused and put her hand on mine. “You are so strong. You pushed so hard and did such a great job.” Hot tears streamed down my face, and off we went.
My husband and I were separated briefly while the anesthesiologist prepped my epi for surgery. The room was freezing and the lights were so bright - a far cry from my dimly lit L&D room with LED candles and meditation music. I shook uncontrollably on the table. My husband appeared, dressed and prepped for a surgical birth. He stood behind me. I felt intense pressure. They explained they needed to push him back out of my pelvis and I felt like my whole body could burst. I tried to visualize what was happening and to connect to my body and the birth. I waited anxiously for someone to lift the blue curtain, staring straight ahead. And finally, they did. And at 10:25pm, this small pink, wriggly person was lifted from my body. He wailed and I felt a sense of instant relief. My husband shouted out — I can’t even remember what he said — but I remember the joy and disbelief in his voice, and I was so grateful to have him there. I heard the team shout out APGARS - 8 and 9 — and felt relief. “Why did he miss points?” I asked. “Color,” replied the anesthesiologist. “It’s totally normal.” After a few minutes, my husband was invited to cut the cord and hold his son; he walked him over to me and one of the providers helped him position our son on my chest for skin to skin. I was shaking so uncontrollably and afraid to hold him alone, so I asked for her to stay there, and she did. I suddenly didn’t feel ready to be his mama.
I heard the team tell the anesthesiologist to push a drug that sounded unfamiliar to me. “Is that for hemorrhaging?” I asked. He told me it was, but everything was under control. I closed my eyes and waited for them to finish.
After several minutes, the surgery was over. I had done well; there were several uterine adhesions from my prior surgery, but each time they tried to clip them, I bled more. They were able to stop the bleeding with a special foam. Baby was well.
I was relieved and ready for sleep. “We have to take you to recovery now,” my nurse explained. “We have to watch you for two hours, and I need to massage your uterus every 15 minutes.” My brand new baby was placed in my arms and I felt like he would slide right off if I didn’t concentrate to stay awake. I asked my husband to hold him. And then the "massage" began, which immediately sent waves of pain that far exceeded any contraction I had felt. I slowly detached from my body and the experience. I felt broken.
After the massage ended, the nurse disappeared for an extended period. My husband and I sat with our new baby unsure of what would come next. When she reappeared, she explained that the post partum unit could not take me with an epidural in place. And since I had a previous reaction to morphine, no one knew how to control my pain. The epidural was discontinued and I was given a dose of fentanyl, which was minimally effective. “My back is still killing me,” I told my nurse. “It’s because you’re in an uncomfortable position,” she stated, without an offer to attempt to help with pain relief or assist in repositioning. By 3am, nearly 4.5 hours after the birth of my son, I was finally wheeled to my post partum room. They played a nursery song on the speakers to announce the arrival of a new baby, but all I wanted to do was cry from pain and sadness. I remember nothing else from the night of his birth. My husband tells me the nurses attempted to assist with breast feeding but we couldn’t latch.
The next morning, my daytime nurse introduced herself. “We have to get this pain under control. I have no idea why they have not offered you oxy.” She called anesthesiology and swiftly orchestrated a pain management plan that was far superior to the prior. I could sit or lay without excruciating pain, which meant I could hold my baby and really start to get to know him. I still couldn’t sit upright without shooting pain and standing was unbearable. I could not imagine how I would care for my son, or how my husband would return to work later in the week as planned.
In the days that followed, I began to slowly feel like myself and regain confidence in my ability to care for my baby. Standing became smoother, and then walking and bending to lift. And finally I was ready to shower. I went from feeling like an observer as my husband did it all, to jumping in and washing pump parts after middle of the night feeds. On my final morning, the OB attending came by for daily rounds. I was rolling my IV pole around the room (the hospital was able to give me my remicade infusion as an inpatient so I wouldn’t have to take my four day old to an infusion center) and packing our bags.
We chatted logistics and she reviewed my precautions. “Any questions?” She asked me. “Yes, Can I hug you?” My son was here. He was healthy, and so was I. I didn’t have the birth I originally wanted, but I had the birth he needed. And I was allowed the space and the time to make these decisions without pressure.
He’s now eight days old and eating like a champ. We’ve established breast feeding after a sluggish start with SNS and finger feeds, and the last of his scalp abrasions are fading away. His bruises are gone. And I’m a mom.
I do think I'd like to go for a vbac but under certain conditions. If my water breaks at home before onset of labor (making everything that much more painful and harder to turn baby without any cushioning) and my baby is sunny side up again, I'm not interested in repeating history. If I go into labor on my own at home and stay in a calm environment / use my hypnobirthing methods I've learned this pregnancy and show up to the hospital only in active labor, I'd like to go for a med free vaginal birth (I loved the relief from the epidural, but I don't love that I couldn't feel my contractions for most of my labor / when I had the most energy to push). But I'm also not interested in risking an emergency C and ending up under general because there's no time to place an epi... so I guess I want to see if we can place an epi but not use it, assuming I arrive in active labor.
So many conditions. Haha.
I'm curious to see what she says - we honestly haven't discussed birth up until this point (other than running the vbac calculator and her telling me she'd support me either way) because there's been so much going on with my crohn's, covid work accommodations, the covid vaccine, etc. But we're certainly getting closer to April!
And, after 8 hours of NO PROGRESS, and the drip so high my contractions were 60s apart and off the chart, he was born 45m after getting the epidural WITH a lower pitocin amount. I went from 4cm to delivering that fast. My experience has been natural - no drugs. Induced/augmented - get the epidural.
With DS1, 16 years later, episiotomies had fallen out of favor. Had my OB chosen not to give me one, I'd have torn through my rectum. She saw the tear and redirected it. The recovery was painful and long, but I believe it would have been worse without it. And again, I had several skids.
DS2, things happened so fast, no one had time for it. I ended up with a tiny, natural INTERNAL 1st degree tear. That was minor and nothing, but took longer to heal for some reason. No skids, thankfully.
SITZ BATH. PERIBOTTLE. WASH WASH WASH WASH EVERY TIME.
@theblondebump I'm so similar with the needing to know whats going on, even if its bad/negative/scary, or my anxiety will take me down a dark rabbit hole. Ask your nurses ALL the questions while in labor, and tell them you need to know whats going on. I spoke up to mine and it made all the difference, especially when things took a bad turn during delivery. I seriously hope I get nurses as exceptional as my previous ones were.
Much like @aisukurimsarang said, an episiotomy isn't as scary as it seems. No one really *wants* one, but sometimes it saves you from further damage and often clean cuts of an episiotomy are easier to stitch than tears. I had both an episiotomy and a tear and I have so much confidence in my doctor's decision to cut. I did discuss with my OB what my feelings were on episiotomies prior to my induction, so we were definitely on the same page. Aftercare is really what made all the difference for me. I was in SO much pain until I finally called my OB's nurse and got better aftercare instructions than the generic ones I got at discharge.
DD FTM Birth Story:
Due date: 8/1/2010 Status: 41+1
Born: 8/9/10 7lbs 4oz 21in 4:26am
Total Labor:31hrs
Sat. 8/7 I went to bed early, feeling miserable and crampy. I was 19, married to a selfish loser, and had gone to the hospital once already about 4 days prior but they sent me home for not being dilated. Dr. would induce if I hit 42w and still hadn’t gone into labor but otherwise told to walk and rest up.
We finally get to the hospital around 8am, pissed off then husband about his hat drops me at the door to go park and I hobble in to check in. I’d been here days prior and didn’t think to call ahead back then so we play the questions game of how I think it’s different this time and yada ya. They take me back to check if I’m dilating and find I’m only at a 2 but also had a temperature so Dr decided to admit me and start pitocin. Then husband is told I’m staying til we have a baby and goes out to make some phone calls. I don’t see him again until almost 9pm.
DS STM Birth Story:
Due Date: 11/11/2013 Status: 39+1
Born: 11/5/13 7lbs 0oz 19in 8:41pm
Total Labor: 31hrs
Do you have access to a birthing class? It really gave me comfort to know what was going to happen. There was also a really good video I watched that I'm trying to find for you but I'm not having any luck right now!! If I find it, I will let you know the name of it.
I had attended two hospital births, listened to and read hundreds of birth stories, taken an in person birth class, watched birth videos, and it still was entirely different than I expected. I think you do the best you can to educate/inform yourself on the logistics, assemble a good support system/team to assist you through your birth, and then give up the idea of controlling it further (which is kind of freeing in a way!).
I was induced at 36+6 for all 3 due to cholestasis of pregnancy. My first took almost two full days and I had cervidil, Foley bulb, and pitocin. I started out at basically half a centimeter if that so my body was def not ready! The Foley bulb was extremely painful, but it did do the trick. It was my only one where my water broke on its own. The other two I started out at 1-2cm. Had cervidil overnight and started pitocin in the morning. They broke my water once I reached 4cm (which took most of the day both times). Things went quickly after that. I opted for an epidural all 3 times which for me was exactly what my body needed to relax. I reallyyyy wanted a natural birth but am coming to realize it just might not be in the cards for my body. After the epidural was placed with babies 2 and 3 I delivered within 1-2 hours and less than 5 min pushing.
Hopefully this makes sense. If you find yourself in an early induction situation my greatest advice is to be very patient with your body. Prepare to be bored at the hospital for a good bit and for it to take a while.... up to two or even three days! Of course a c-section is sometimes needed but if you have patient providers and stay patient with yourself it is 100% possible to have a successful induction even if your body isn't quite ready!
I'm also just as scared of L&D with this baby as I was the first go round. I have no idea what to expect.
I was at a very horrible hospital. They failed putting in the epidural 3 times and gave up. My husband and I were alone most of the time I was pushing with the very occasional nurse visit. The doctor wouldn't come see me, because she was finishing up her paperwork for the day. My daughter was in the birth canal for hours while we waited, her head was sticking out we could see it for literal hours. I wanted to strangle the nurse everytime she mentioned "all of her long hair" because they wouldn't actually help me deliver her. I needed an episiotomy, and once I had one she came right out. I still have tons of scarring and my daughter was born with a ton of health issues.
I was so traumatized that I went to a midwife for my next pregnancy, but that resulted in a loss at 12 weeks and she handled it horribly. So this time I'm at a different hospital that seems way better. It's a much smaller population here so the doctors care way more about each patient.