IF Testing & Treatment w/o 8.3

keikilove · August 2020

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation.

Diagnosis (if you've been):

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):

How are things going?:

Any questions?:

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery?

legallykate · August 2020

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA, DOR

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO technically

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): HSG on Wednesday, wish me luck!

How are things going?: Pretty good, I took the entire day off from work yesterday, it was the first day I have billed absolutely 0 time since April 25! It felt pretty good, although I didn't really take advantage to do anything special or fun. I am trying to eat as healthy as possible again leading up to FET next month after being lax for a couple weeks since ER, and going back to just one caffeinated coffee a day is kicking my butt a bit. Hoping to have a really busy month work-wise to keep me distracted though. I asked MH if he wanted to bother trying naturally this month and he looked at me like I was crazy so I guess we are self-benched for this cycle.

Any questions?: For those who have done HSG, did you take any type of OTC pain med in advance? The woman who scheduled it for me seemed to think that was okay, but maybe I should call my RE nurse to confirm? Or just try to go without?

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? I will sometimes throw $20 at it when the jackpot gets close to a billion, but I am not a regular player. Not that I couldn't use like $1 million or $10 million, lol.

inthewoods23 · August 2020

@legallykate for an HSG it should be fine to take some pain meds. Is there a reason they're doing that over a saline sono?

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained, low morph

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): naturally trying and tracking, 2nd opinion on the 20th

How are things going?: Was feeling good this weekend! DH was organizing some areas of the house while I was gone at my parents and let me tell you, it's amazing how much roomier everything is when you can see the floor haha. Since we have our Robomow service we haven't been using the lawn mower so DH tried to move that to our barn shed in the back but since that's in the wooded area there's not a clear path to it for the mower. We need to cut some stuff down. I'd like to eventually make a gravel path or maybe use large stepping stones so that we don't have to worry about weeds coming up in the middle of the path. But BOY does it seem like we also have a spacious garage without that lawn mower in the corner

I'm feeling really good even with doing some minor house stuff for 2 weekends in a row. Sadly there are still plenty of devil weeds to pull up!

Any questions?: I should probably come up with some questions for our 2nd opinion with the other RE, but idk what to ask. Any ideas? Can someone remind me later this week to get all the paperwork stuff I need to get done before the appointment?? I feel like I'm going to forget.

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? I've never bought tickets for the Powerball or anything, but I dabble in the scratchers occasionally. Mostly because my parents buy us 5 $5 scratchers as stocking stuffers at Christmas (plus the large $15 dollar one that's sort of an advent calendar scratcher). We get to keep whatever we win. So far no one has won anything real big, but I did with $50 on the $15 scratcher the first year they bought them for us. It's just a fun silly little thing. And then that cash we win sits in my wallet for months because I never use cash for purchases lol. It's been good for emergencies though!

akoros · August 2020

Diagnosis (if you've been): AMA, unexplained RPL (TFMR for T21; MMC in 2nd trimester, so far unexplained)

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): Post-D&C bleeding seems to have stopped (yay), so now just waiting for my first period so I can figure out what my cycles are doing

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Testing, had my first appointment on Friday with the MFM genetic counselor. Was definitely more emotional than I'd hoped (have mostly been doing well, but she's the same counselor from my pre-TFMR testing and is super nice, which tends to make me cry...I do better when things are "all business"). Going to try and get blood taken at my OB/GYN follow-up this week and then have a follow up with the MFM when the results come back.

How are things going?: Ok? I hesitate to say "good", but seems like more positive moments than bad ones. On Friday the counselor said that our son's karyotype came back completely normal. I know this is good news, but the first thing that popped in my head was "he was fine," and just broke my heart. My medical and our family history, plus these results, indicate that it's highly unlikely that we're carriers for genetic defects, and there also aren't any indications of anatomical abnormalities, so going to focus on testing for various hormonal issues, APA, and infections. Increasingly likely that they won't find any clear reason for the miscarriage, which is technically good but still really frustrating.

Any questions?: Nope

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? Occasionally, but not frequently. Mostly around Christmas some relatives or friends will buy some scratchers as small gifts just for fun.

emeraldduchess · August 2020

Good morning, ladies! Have to post and run, but I'll be back for tags later.

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained IF, unexplained RPL, possible hormone issues?

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFAF. She's taking her time this month. Before I started IF treatments, my LP would be about 12 days, with spotting starting as early as 9dpo. Now I am about 15 dpo and nothin'.

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IVF

How are things going?: OK. Very frustrated over the job search, but I won't complain about that anymore. Went in for an ultrasound this morning. I don't recommend a 7:00 am date with the u/s wand! The tech was having some issues with the computer keyboard, so that was awkward! She said there was evidence I O'ed (yay!) and that I have some follies that look ready for stims, so FX! Other than the usual, I am doing OK. Just ready to start with the stims as soon as they give us the green light!

Any questions?: If I start stims this week, should I do anything like ice the skin at the injection site? Alternate injection sites?

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? If the Powerball jackpot was really, really high, my coworkers and I would sometimes go in on a bunch of tickets. But other than that and the scratch tickets we get at Christmas, I don't. My grandmother and my aunt both had season tickets for the lottery, which I didn't even know was a thing.

bbrahmbhatt · August 2020

@legallykate GL with HSG this week!

@inthewoods23 yay for organizing and having more room! I love how it feels after organizing/purging around the house; it's a general feeling of "ahhh".

@akoros I'm so sorry you are going through this. Yes, I know what you mean about that being good, but also frustrating and heartbreaking. Sending you virtual hugs.

@emeraldduchess sorry the job search is still ongoing. FX for something amazing soon! Yay for O and good follies! I hope you are ok'ed to proceed soon!

Diagnosis (if you've been): unknown (workup ongoing)

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): This is our first Clomid cycle

How are things going?: Ok. I am pretty sure O is going to be any day, based on my CM (FINALLY getting some EWCM) and right lower quadrant pain.

Any questions?: Does anyone know if it is normal for Clomid to only affect one ovary? I can't seem to find much on the interwebs about that specific question. I've been having R sided discomfort/fullness for a few days, but now it feels like its getting closer to my usual ovulation pain, with nothing happening on the left.

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? Not really. I have dabbled in the scratchers here and there but only a few times.

kpearse99 · August 2020

@legallykate That's so great that you took a day off for yourself yesterday! Who cares if you didn't do anything special or go anywhere crazy. You gave yourself a day off and a break and that's the best kind of day off, if you ask me! FX that Wednesday goes super smoothly for you!

@inthewoods23 I LOVE cleaning things out and then feeling so much better about life when I realize how much more space and organization I have! Clutter really stresses me out!

@emeraldduchess Great news that you Od friend!! woohoo!

@akoros Keep trying to focus on those positive and good days. They will become more and more frequent and those are the days that will get you through the bad days.

@bbrahmbhatt From what I've learned is that even on medicated cycles it's typical and common for your body to switch sides as to which one will release an egg. Based on my ultrasounds when I was doing medicated cycles my body always switched from right side to left side every month.

Diagnosis (if you've been): Secondary Unexplained IF

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFAF - the girls have started to become sore so I'm expecting AF by the end of the week (finally...ugh another somewhat long cycle!)

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Trying not to think about TTC

How are things going?: Pretty good, I guess! I can't remember if I mentioned this last week but work confirmed that we are WFH for the rest of the year (at least!) So that's exciting. As far as TTC goes, it's going.

**TW in spoiler for mention of LO**

I apologize for mentioning DS in here, you all know I normally don't but it does really pertain to how I am doing this week as far as TTC goes.
I will remove this though if I make anyone uncomfortable so please just let me know!
I was doing great and perfectly content with our decision to just "stop trying and see what happens". But then this weekend DS (who is 8) says "I just feel like we are never going to get our baby, mommy. It's just been too long." Sigh.... talk about a dagger straight through the heart. I told him that sometimes some people have a harder time and need help and that's why mommy was seeing the doctor and I told him that we can't give up hope and all we can do is just keep praying and wishing and hoping, but that if it doesn't end up happening for us that we would all be fine and would be okay. And he said "Not me! I'd still be all alone."

I didn't know what else to say other than us just trying to keep positive wishes going. Part of me was so close to talking to him about the 2 losses we had these past 2 years of trying, I'm not even really sure why to be honest... just so he could maybe understand how hard TTC really is, but I talked myself out of that conversation. I was in a hazy fog the rest of the weekend because of this conversation. Every single time I start to be OK with how things are going it's like he senses it and says something to rub salt in the open wound (I know he doesn't mean to or know anything about the struggles) but he is honestly the hardest part about all of these failed months, because of how badly he wants to be a big brother.

Any questions?: n/a

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? We play scratch offs and occasionally will play the powerball if it's a big pot of money haha DH's family plays like everyday or every week though!

**Edited to fix a stupid mistake I made with @akoros

akoros · August 2020

@kpearse99 What does "LO" stand for? (I looked on the guide thread but didn't see it). I thought that referred to "little one" and only applied to current pregnancies or living children, neither of which I have. Is it that we shouldn't reference the gender of our losses?

kpearse99 · August 2020

@akoros OMG I am so so sorry!!!! Please forgive me! I thought you were talking about a living child (LO stands for loved one or little one). Ugh again, I am so very sorry!! I struggle to remember what everyone has gone through and I totally forgot that you recently mentioned your loss and getting the testing done. I can't apologize enough!!

This is me putting my foot in my mouth!

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/4a9czjWQtayOWIfLEt/giphy.gif

akoros · August 2020

@kpearse99 No worries! I didn't take it personally, just wanted to be sure that I wasn't inadvertently breaking any rules. We all have a lot of challenges and it can be easy to miss what is hurtful to someone else

inthewoods23 · August 2020

@akoros sending lots of hugs

I don't have experience with losses, but I have a friend who had a 2nd tri loss so I've heard a bit from her how awful it all is to go in to the doctor thinking everything is wonderful only to hear awful news. I hope that bloodwork helps provide some answers for you.

@emeraldduchess come oooonnnnn stims!! I was always itching for AF to show to get the show on the road. Do you have a tentative ER date?

@bbrahmbhatt it's funny how you think you need a bigger house/more room for XYZ but in reality you just need to get your shit together and organized and then all of a sudden a room will seem so barren haha

@kpearse99 yes! DH is understanding a bit more now how much clutter and messes keep my anxiety up so al this clean up/organizing makes home feel so much more welcome and homey. Your story breaks my heart

I can't even imagine being in your shoes.

thegirlwhowaited_ · August 2020

Sorry I've been absent for a while, I needed a break from the digital world and social media.

@legallykate fx for your HSG! I remember being so nervous for mine, but once it's done it's done. My RE did mine and she had told me before I could take some Tylenol before the appointment. I did, but honestly I'm not sure it helped at all. But I'd recommend calling/emailing your RE's nurse and ask what they recommend.

@emeraldduchess Yay for O! Do you know when you might get the green light?

@bbrahmbhatt I've had cycles on Clomid where both ovaries responded and some where just one side responded. I think it can vary. Although my left side tends to have the most reaction. I think it's body specific.

@kpearse99 Yay for WFH, DH and I are WFH until at least the end of Jan 2021, maybe longer.

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Hoping for a miracle, trying on our own since we hit the RE's recommendation for number of IUIs.

How are things going?: Fine I guess for as good it could be. We honestly haven't done much this cycle. We were planning an appointment with my RE tomorrow, but I canceled it because I'm just not sure I'm ready for IVF. So we weren't really trying much this time. Only HO twice and I didn't do any BBT. I've just kept notice of my CM. It's CD 28 and I've had a small amount of spotting yesterday and today. I can't help but think "maybe it happened" but more than likely AF will show up tomorrow or Wednesday. It's hard to not get my hopes up.

Any questions?: nope.

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? We play occasionally, but not regularly or very often. Maybe a few tickets a year. I honestly can't ever remember to buy them.

legallykate · August 2020

@inthewoods23 I’m always so impressed by all your housework/yardwork! My yard is a complete disaster but MH still wants to wait and make sure we don’t need to budget for another retrieval before moving forward with our artificial lawn so every time I look out back it’s like a messy reminder that I don’t really have any control over this process. I think for the second opinion you will probably just want to feel them out as to what if anything they would recommend different from what your current RE is saying, right? I think ultimately you will just get a feel for which path you should take between the two.

@akoros Glad the bleeding has stopped but sorry you had an emotional appointment and didn’t really get any great answers. Hope the additional testing can provide some answers or alternately some reassurance for moving forward.

@emeraldduchess Hoping AF hurries up so you can start stims. Yay for everything looking good to start! I didn’t use any ice other than afterwards with the Cetrotide when it itched. If you really focus on pinching and stabbing and then releasing and injecting slowly, it really doesn’t hurt too bad. I did alternate sites along my abdomen though.

@bbrahmbhatt I think it is normal in general for ovaries to respond differently. One of mine was wayyy slower to respond to stims than the other one but I think played some good catch up toward the end.

@kpearse99 Big hugs re: your spoiler. That must be super hard to hear on top of everything else. Hang in there, friend. And yay for WFH for the foreseeable future, I am in the same boat and its pretty surreal but I’m overall super happy about it.

@thegirlwhowaited_ FX hard for you having a miracle cycle. I’m sorry your RE is sticking to her guns about IUI cycles. I know I don’t have the most experience of the group, but I am always happy to answer any questions about my personal experience with IVF if that could be helpful at all moving forward (but seriously FX you won’t need to think about it).

bbrahmbhatt · August 2020

@kpearse99 sending you big *hugs*. I can't imagine how hard that is for you to hear; its awful enough to live it but to be reminded of it is just that much worse.

@thegirlwhowaited_ that is really tough. I'm hoping so hard for you that you won't have to go that route at all.

@inthewoods23 lol I know exactly what you mean! I tend to hang on to things more than MH, so sometimes I'll be like "we need more organizational totes" and he suggests we go through stuff first, and then I purge and we no longer need more stuff to hold the excess stuff. XD

@legallykate that is good to hear. Hopefully everything is going as it should in there.

kpearse99 · August 2020

Thanks ladies 💕💕💕

@thegirlwhowaited_ it IS so hard not to get your hopes up, right?! I think that if your gut is telling you that you’re not ready for IVF yet than you did the right think by canceling your appointment. Always listen to your gut!

acleverusername · August 2020

@legallykate I'm glad you got a day off; it sounds like you needed to do absolutely nothing with it. As for HSG, my RE prescribed Toradol 10mg to take 30 min before procedure. I think any NSAID would do the trick though. Did it work? Maybe... it wasn't as uncomfortable as I thought it would be. Also lol @ YH's reaction to trying naturally.

@inthewoods23 Ideas for 2nd opinion meeting: is there anything about your current RE that you don't like? Have you heard (here or elsewhere) of something being done differently that you want to try? Otherwise, I think just seeing what they propose to you and how comfortable you are with the doctor / clinic.

@akoros I am sorry the meeting with the counselor was so emotional; it's okay to feel that way and to let your emotions out. Healthier than keeping them in. Good luck with the rest of testing; maybe something will turn up.

@emeraldduchess please continue to update us on the job search so that we can celebrate when you find the perfect one! Also, super excited for you to start your stim cycle! I hope you get the green light in the next few days. Do you have your protocol already?

@bbrahmbhatt C'mon O! So much for your OB saying you'll O on Day 14. *eye roll*

@kpearse99 *hugs* that sounds like a really tough situation. I probably would have reacted the same way (i.e. contemplating whether to say something about the losses or not). Yay for WFH though. Hopefully you have a good routine going and are enjoying the extra time not spent getting ready / commuting (I know I certainly am!)

@thegirlwhowaited_ what is the max # of IUI's that your RE recommends? Either way, I am sorry you find yourself at the end of that line. I agree w/ @kpearse99 ... listen to your gut; it took me many years, but I've finally learned to listen to mine and it's given me all sorts of wisdom.

AFM...

Diagnosis (if you've been): LPD, PCOS, AMA, probably other stuff...

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): MH and I are finishing up all the tests ordered by RE and the NaPro OB before finalizing our path forward. Sent off our genetic carrier screening this morning. Had my HSG last week, and it was all clear. Next is a pelvic MRI scheduled for 8/11. At this point, I'm pretty sure we're going to proceed with the RE since going with NaPro requires a longer term commitment and I'm not sure I have the patience to try when 37 is just around the corner. Either way, I am happy with the extensive testing that the NaPro has ordered; it'll be good to have some sort of diagnosis from her before moving to ART.

How are things going?: I'm really looking forward to having our plan finalized and getting things started next cycle. Although, I'm sure my body is going to make me wait for my next cycle since last cycle was only 24 days. I've been tracking my period since 2014, and just had a look at what my cycles were when I was off BC between 2013-2017 and they were ALL. OVER. THE. PLACE. 23 days, 28 days, 37 days, 30 days, even an 18-day cycle 🙄.

I went hiking on Saturday with a friend/my former housemate this w/e and she asked how our baby-making was going so I gave her to full update including starting convos with the RE. She asked me how I was feeling about all of that and I told her honestly that I was optimistic. Of course it would have been nice if we'd succeeded in conceiving naturally, but given my menstrual history and PCOS diagnosis back in 2009, I was mentally prepared to end up here. I'm not a pessimistic individual, but I am 💯a realist and a planner.

Any questions?: has anyone else had a pelvic MRI before? The RE has ordered it because of a previous ultrasound that suspected adenomyosis since it's the only conclusive way to diagnose. That said, she also stated that it would not alter the tentative plan we had discussed (superovulation + IUI) so this would be for diagnosis only. It seems like a worthwhile thing to do either way; the only issue is cost, but I think this is going to be an expensive medical year anyway, so might as well pack it all in so we can get some tax refunds.

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? I will very occasionally buy a scratch ticket or a powerball ticket... maybe 2x a year? And it's usually a "by the seat of my pants" kind of decision since – as @legallykate
pointed out – I will take any and all the moneys I win from lottery. My ex was addicted to sports betting and also lottery so it totally turned me off gambling of any kind. I'll take my chances in the stock market instead.

thegirlwhowaited_ · August 2020

@acleverusername She is only allowing me to do 3, which we've done. My OB even called her and suggested another with Letrozole instead of Clomid and she just wants to move to IVF. Which is great for her and those who can afford it, but for us it means we're stuck until probably next year. My OB won't refer me to another RE, and I'm honestly not sure what the other options would be here without driving to Austin.

kpearse99 · August 2020

@acleverusername I think it's great that you were able to open up IRL to a friend! She sounds very supportive and interested in how YOU are doing and how YOU are feeling about everything, and that's a great kind of friend!

legallykate · August 2020

@acleverusername I think it’s so great that you’ve had so much testing done, and I think even if you move forward with the RE that will be invaluable. I think the realist attitude is also super helpful in this IF journey. Hope your cycle is a short one so you can move forward soon with whatever you decide!

@thegirlwhowaited_ YGPM.

bbrahmbhatt · August 2020

@acleverusername lol I know! When day 14 came and went I was internally eye rolling, but I like my OB so we'll see. I'm glad you're close to the end of the round of tests. I haven't had a pelvic MRI, but I would think it would be less involved than the HSG. I think its great you're optimistic, but also realistic; that attitude will be invaluable in what MH calls "this marathon".

@thegirlwhowaited_ is there a specific reason she only wants to do 3? I agree with what some of the others have said, its always good to listen to your gut.

acleverusername · August 2020

@thegirlwhowaited_ hmmm, that sounds like an arbitrarily low limit for IUI's. Did she give an explanation as to why only 3? In our initial conversation with our RE, she mentioned trying IUI 4-5 times. That said, I've heard from friends who've gone through the process that each successive IUI is less likely to succeed.

@kpearse99 I have been really lucky to have made a few really great friends in the 2 years since I moved from Canada to the US; she is definitely one of them. I've actually been deliberately forthcoming about my fertility journey with many friends, even some males ones. I find it therapeutic to be able to talk about it. It's also allowed many of my friends who've already had kids to open up about their past struggles to conceive.

@legallykate Thank you. 🤗

thegirlwhowaited_ · August 2020

@bbrahmbhatt Their practice feels it can be a waist of the life-time max that can be used towards IF treatments and that it would be better to increase the odds by using IVF since there is only a 10% chance with IUI. I think I'm at a point of just wanting to lose some weight and focus on me right now. I told DH that we can save and if we use it for IVF that's fine, if not then we have that for something for the house. So at least for a few months I'm trying to just think about my health and maybe in the meantime I'll see what other RE options I have here.

For those who previously asked about my RE not wanting to do a scope for endometriosis, my OB said she'd do it if I want her to. So that is something else I'm considering as each cycle the pain seems to be increasing again.

kpearse99 · August 2020

@acleverusername I have actually had the same experience as you when it comes to sharing my infertility struggles. I have learned SO MUCH from others and I found it so eye opening how many of them struggled too, even though on social media it seemed so easy for them. Struggling with IF has really made me realize how little it's talked about and how many people out there really do struggle, in one way or another, and it's made me feel less alone.

keikilove · August 2020

I will be back in a couple hours for tags & a full update. But right now having some anxiety because we are headed to our baseline ultrasound for IVF (round 2 of this appointment). I’m nervous because I’ve been having some left-sided ovulation pain twinges for the past 4 days, and they’re still there this morning. I had them very strong last time, which led to the treatment plan getting cancelled. Praying the twinges are nothing this time & that we can move forward today!!🙏🏽🤞🏽 Just had to get this off my chest, been worrying about if for days without expressing it. Thanks for listening!

bbrahmbhatt · August 2020

@keikilove good luck! Fingers crossed so hard you can move forward!

emeraldduchess · August 2020

@keikilove thinking of you, friend! FX that you get the all clear at your baseline. Update us as soon as you can!!

@acleverusername I don't have a protocol yet for ER. I just have all the meds and needles ready to go! I assume they will give me a protocol once I FINALLY get my period. I'm so happy you have an IRL friend to open up to. That's so important!

@thegirlwhowaited_ I agree that you made the right choice cancelling your appointment if you're not ready to move to IVF yet. It's a huge, emotionally charged decision and you can NOT dive in if you're not prepared. DH really struggled with making that decision, too.

@kpearse99 my heart hurts for you, hearing those words. I'll put the rest in a spoiler here because it mentions your LC.

I am an only child too, so I do understand where he is coming from. I didn't like being an only child, and my mom struggled with secondary IF. Like you said, he definitely is not rubbing salt in the wound on purpose. I was about the same age as your DS and I truly couldn't understand why my mom going to the doctor didn't magically result in me getting a sibling. Most kids' thought process is that you go to the doctor and the doctor fixes what is wrong. As hard as it is to hear what he is saying, it's important for him to talk about how he feels. I think you are handling this with him perfectly and when he is older, you can tell him more. IF sucks for everyone in the family, but hearing others voice how hard it is on them definitely adds another layer of hurt.

@bbrahmbhatt yay for O! Let's go, ovaries!

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/3o72ww78zTL1UB0Sxq/giphy.gif

@akoros I'm glad that you have a nice counselor. I'm sure it helps to have someone compassionate, even though sometimes you prefer "all business". I feel like I have a good mix of that at my RE's office. My RE is very business-y, while the nurses are super sweet.

@inthewoods23 I don't have a possible ER date yet. I am worried about it conflicting with possible job interviews (I know, what the heck is wrong with me), but I figure interviews can be rescheduled. I CAN'T put this on hold just because someone *might* call me! That's awesome that you're getting things cleaned up/cleaned out. I need to get on that in some parts of my house!

@legallykate good luck with your HSG tomorrow! I took ibuprofen before mine. You can always double check with the RE's office about what you can/can't take. They recommended I take ibuprofen 30 minutes before. LOL about your DH's reaction to trying naturally. I think mine would react the same way. The meds are in the fridge, we already paid the lab fees for PGS, and we signed all the paper work. We're all in on this, dammit!

AFM, I am STILL waiting for my period to start. Looks like my rogue ovaries have been a bad influence on my uterus. Get it together, reproductive system!

If it doesn't start today, I have to go in for blood work tomorrow morning. The nurse told me yesterday that if AF doesn't show, "don't worry, WE HAVE A PLAN!" I love those ladies.

bluetickgal · August 2020

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS and Unexplained RPL

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Injectables with IUI

How are things going?: Going really well! Monitoring appointment yesterday showed two follicles at 15 mm and one at 14 mm (there was another one that was smaller but he didn’t give me exact size, just said that hopefully it won’t grow...3 is enough! Haha). He had me do one more Follistim injection last night, I’ll trigger tonight, and IUI is on Thursday! Eek!! I’m just in awe that I have 3 mature follicles and will be doing the IUI on CD13...the earliest I ever ovulated with Letrozole was CD15, and the previous two IUI’s were on CD18! DH and I are both super hopeful about this cycle...and just the new treatment in general!! I know we will be devastated if this cycle doesn’t work out, but we will give it probably two more shots if not and hopefully one will be a success!

Any questions?: None right now.

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? I have gone in on coworker pools when the Powerball gets really high, they always got me with the peer pressure of “do you want to be the only one left in the office if we all win and quit?” Haha. I think I bought one on my own several years ago, but that’s it.

@legallykate hoping your HSG goes smoothly tomorrow!! Good for you for taking the day off...that’s a long time without a break! Hopefully you can get back into the healthy habits leading up to your FET! I do half caff (or less) and don’t notice a difference in taste at all. Could you do that and then maybe allow yourself 2 in a day that way?

@inthewoods23 glad you are feeling good after a productive weekend!! We cleared our garage of some clutter (by moving it to our shed) recently, and ours feels so much more spacious too! I’m glad you are getting the second opinion! Will they have all the info from your first RE, or will it be like you are starting from scratch with testing and everything?

@akoros sending so many hugs your way!!💜 I hope the additional testing gives you some answers...unexplained can be hard, but that is a positive thing that you aren’t carriers for any genetic issues!!

@emeraldduchess boo to the 7am ultrasound...but that’s great that it looks like you O’d and there are follies ready for stims!! I hope AF shows today, but that’s great that they have a plan if not!! Can’t wait for you to get this ER cycle going!

@bbrahmbhatt yay, glad O seems to be right around the corner! Like others have said, it’s typical for your body to switch up the side it O’s from whether it’s a natural or medicated cycle. I typically O from my left side...but all the mature follicles this cycle are on my right. I think our bodies just like to keep us on our toe! Haha.

@kpearse99 friend, sending so many hugs your way!! 💜 My heart broke for you as I read your update!! I think you are doing the right thing by telling him that it’s harder for some people and to just keep being hopeful/positive! I am hoping with everything in me that you will make him a big brother soon, but I know that he is so loved and will not truly be alone no matter what!!

@thegirlwhowaited_ hoping so hard that the spotting was a good sign! It is so difficult not to get your hopes up, but I will be hopeful for you too! I think that’s good that you cancelled the appointment if you aren’t ready for IVF and you know that’s what your RE is going to recommend! Maybe you could search around and see if there are any RE’s nearby to get a second opinion...maybe ones that don’t require a referral? If so, you could possibly switch to Letrozole and do a couple more IUI’s with that, or maybe even consider injectables before moving on to IVF. Still hoping none of this is necessary though and this cycle was a success!!

@acleverusername I’m so glad you are nearing the end of your testing and getting your plan finalized!! I love your approach of being optimistic but also a realist! It’s hard not to get your hopes up too far sometimes, but that hope/optimism is also what drives us to keep going! That’s great you have opened up to a friend that was really supportive!

@keikilove sending all the positive vibes your way, friend!! 💜 Hoping you get a great update at your US and you can move forward with this cycle!!!

inthewoods23 · August 2020

@thegirlwhowaited_ go for IVF when you're ready. I know that was a really tough call for us as well. They had me on BC for about a month and a half before the actual ER date so while that felt like forever, it gave my mind the time it needed to feel good about moving forward.

@legallykate I want to say it's not that much house/yardwork but at the same time we're nowhere near done

but a good amount is so I should be proud of that! It's just made worse with the previous owner not really living in the house for the last 3 years he owned it so I used to have to deal with 3ft call thistle weeds. Those were not pleasant to pull up!

@bbrahmbhatt yes I'd love to buy a bunch of totes/bins/etc but we should trash stuff first!

@acleverusername I like all your points. I think I would be interested to see how she would have gone about our treatment and get her thoughts on the diet. And also whether or not we should repeat anything. I don't want to go back to my first RE for a transfer unless I get some pretty strong opinions that it's our only way to go. Glad you have a friend to talk to about what you're going through. I have a friend (who is the complete opposite in terms of fertility ha) who has been great to talk to.

@keikilove hope everything looks good for the appointment!

@emeraldduchess hopefully you get a date soon so you can at least notify interviewers of when you can interview as well as bad dates/times to call you for follow ups or offers! And hurry the F up AF!

@bluetickgal not gonna lie, having follicles ready early in my cycles was the best part of IUI

my first one was at the usual time of trigger on CD17 or something, but the other 2 were all ready at CD12 and I loved how quickly the time would go. Too bad we can't make the TWW shorter! Yes, I'm supposed to fax over all my previous records before my appointment on the 20th. Gotta find a good day to submit that. I'm not sure if I have to call and tell them to fax it or if I can do it online. I would think just because of how long it's been that we'd redo my BW and DH's SA but we'll see. DH's SA was before he was ever taking any kind of supplement or vitamin so I would think we'd get new info by having that repeated to see what we're dealing with. My hope would be that it would show that we could find success with no more than IUIs. We'll see! I'm feeling good about getting the 2nd opinion but I'm also feeling good about this cycle being successful on its own!

keikilove · August 2020

@legallykate Congrats on taking your first full day off! That’s huge, I hope you enjoyed doing nothing! And LOL @YH looking at you crazy. 😜 Too funny. Sending you good energy for a painless HSG tomorrow💓

@inthewoods23 Yay for all the house/yard projects you’ve been getting done! So good to hear that it’s helping your mental health too. There’s nothing like that clean organized feeling to make a house feel like home. Re: your 2nd opinion: I wonder if you want to ask them about the possibility of PCOS? Didn’t you have tons of eggs at last retrieval? I wonder if that’s connected to anything, and if so, what they might do about it...Also possibly ask what their thoughts are about priming for implantation, like do they do an HCG wash, use embryo glue, etc? Could help you find out how different they are from your current RE practice.

@akoros I’m glad you’re having more good moments than bad ones. I totally get what you’re feeling when you say “Oh, he was just fine” and it’s heartbreaking. It is so incredibly hard to know that & wonder “what happened then”? I so hope you get answers. But be aware that MFMs aren’t necessarily aware of even common issues. I was shocked when I found out I had MTHFR (they dismissed it) and PAI-1, a fairly common blood-clotting disorder that the MFM & geneticist were totally unfamiliar with. I found that unacceptable & will switch MFMs in the future. The last thing is that you *could* ask your doctor to run the “Chicago bloods” or “Chicago tests”. Tons of vials of blood are shipped to Rosalind Franklin University Lab in Chicago from all over the world for women with histories like yours. My Reproductive Immunologist helps run that lab. They test for & uncover lots of things that regular labs don’t. They found an additional blood-clotting disorder in me, as well as the elevated natural killer cells & cytokines. Countries without reproductive immunologists send their patients’ tests there.

@emeraldduchess Yay for having follies ready for stims! Remind me, are you doing a natural IVF cycle? Do you know approximately what day of a new cycle that you will start injections? I heard Dr.Kiltz @CNY Fertility say that stims can start anytime, no need to wait for AF. I thought that was interesting...

@bbrahmbhatt Yay for O day! I hope it all works out. No insight on the Clomid, but I frequently have intense feelings on one ovary or the other. I hope it worked it’s magic on you! And thanks for the well wishes today💗

@kpearse99 Hooray for WFH through the remainder of 2020! That’s amazing. Also, hope AF shows up soon for you. Re: your spoiler, I am so so sorry it’s been so tough. I really feel for you (the rest in spoiler, LC mentioned):

I remember when your son was 6, and now he’s 8. I totally relate to everything you shared & I’m SO sorry you’ve been going through it. I never mention it anymore, but I also have secondary IF & I have a LO who does the same thing as your son. It is absolutely heartbreaking. I don’t ever participate in TFAS because I can barely keep a steady presence w these threads, let alone adding one more! But also because my posts would mostly be about how devastating it is to hear my LO spend her birthday wishes, dandelion wishes, and goodnight prayers on asking for a baby sister.😭 She was 2 when we first started all this, now she’s about to be 5....It is so scary to think about what might happen if we can’t fulfill the communal family wish.... Hoping for the best for ALL of us. Sending virtual Hugs to you!💗💗💗

@thegirlwhowaited_ Welcome back! Sorry you had to cancel the RE appointment, but you definitely have to go with your gut. It’s such a commitment, as others have said. I’m a proponent of IUIs because they are so inexpensive & fairly non-invasive. My RE said that 4-6 IUI have the chance of one IVF cycle, but so much cheaper. I’ve done many IUI. Spoiler for sensitive info:

We did 4 unmedicated (all worked at first, then failed as chemical pregnancies), then we just did a 5th IUI recently w Letrozole &..... nada. So here we are at IVF. If I didn’t have an implantation problem we might’ve gotten a happy ending with an IUI that cost less than $500. That’s why I encourage people to try them until they’re sure it’s not the right path anymore. I hope you can continue them if that’s what you feel in your gut may be the right move right now.

@acleverusername Congrats on getting most of the testing finished! You’ve been so thorough. I’ve had almost everything you’ve had done (except NaPro doc)— except it took me 15 months to accomplish! I’ve had a uterine MRI. I did get diagnosed with questionable adenomyosis from that combined with a hysteroscopy. I don’t talk about it because there’s basically nothing they can do about it besides the usual diet changes & antibiotics, ‘so why give it any energy?’ is my attitude. I have to answer a question from you from last week, I think, but I wanted to get these fresh tags finished first. Will be back after my appointment to catch up fully.

inthewoods23 · August 2020

@keikilove you know, that's something I've wondered for the longest time. My cycles are regular, predictable, and within the usual length so I think on the surface it looks like everything is normal. I can only recall 1 particular cycle in which my cramps were so bad I skipped class, but that was in college and I was on BC at the time so... doesn't really make sense. However yes, my AFC was over 30 total and we did end up retrieving 24 eggs (17 mature, but that was with a half dose of the trigger shot instead of the full one) from my ER last year. AMH was around 4.5 which depending on the source says it's an indicator of PCOS or could possibly just mean my egg quality is above average for my age - no idea how true that is *shrug*. I definitely do think I want to bring that up.

akoros · August 2020

@keikilove Fascinating, I'll keep all of that in mind. We'll see how these come back, and if they don't find anything will ask. It's all confusing to me, so far I know I'm being tested for APA, thyroid, thrombophilia, and Factor V (along with hemoglobin and various infections).

ramzlau · August 2020

Ha. I checked this thread this morning and was like oh 18 comments only! Great I can catch up this week. Now a few hours later...double the comments. I will get through them all though!

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained (secondary?)

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WFAF

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Got my AMH results back, it was 4.5 so well above the 1.5 mark my RE wanted to see. H is doing a repeat SA, and I will start with monitoring the next cycle.

How are things going?: Good! It is good to be off the bench and doing something again. Hard not to get hopeful again though.

Any questions?: NATM

GTKY: Do you/will you ever play the lottery? Maybe a handful of times in my life. I don't feel that lucky when it comes to winning drawings etc.

ramzlau · August 2020

Ah I did remember the question I had. Is anyone on metaformin for PCOS? My RE has said in the past she suspects that I might be borderline PCOS, and I have gone down a rabbit hole about being insulin resistant and PCOS being a symptom of it. Just curious what anyones experience has been if you aren't diabetic but on it for IF treatments.

@legallykate I took some right after mine, but I think the doctor had said I could take before. Good luck with your HSG!

@inthewoods23 Yay for getting house projects done! I am not sure what I would ask a second opinion beyond what I would ask in the first RE appointment. Usually mine goes something like, this has been our experience, what do you think?

@akoros Sounds like such a tough emotional week. I hope you give yourself time and space to heal. Lots of TLC while you wait on answers.

@emeraldduchess Hope you find a job lead soon! Unemployment is so taxing. Hope AF showed for you today!

@bbrahmbhatt I usually only produces follies on one side when we are doing meds for IUIs (including Clomid), so unless your RE is intentionally trying to up the count, one side would be normal. Are you getting monitoring?

@kpearse99 Hugs friend, because I understand and that is so hard. It is hard enough to get yourself to a good place to be okay with the outcome, but to also have someone else dependent on you can be so hard. I am in the same boat. Feel free to PM to vent.

@thegirlwhowaited_ Some obgyns in my area will do medicated IUIs, have you shopped around at that level if your obgyn doesn't offer? It's too bad you don't have another RE option in the area.

@acleverusername It is such a relief to have someone IRL to unload the burden of IF on. It is good that you have someone who is caring and a thoughtful listener.

@keikilove How did the baseline go?

@bluetickgal FX so hard for your IUI this cycle! Hope those 2 great follies and the swimmers get real cozy!

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/ob/p5da15wxi2rj.gif

acleverusername · August 2020

@thegirlwhowaited_ losing weight / focusing on yourself is very important too so if you can achieve those things while you contemplate next steps, it ought to be a win-win. Good luck!

@emeraldduchess huh... how did you know how much medication you'll need without the protocol? Or was all of that arranged by the clinic?

@bluetickgal Congrats on your 3 decently sized follies! Good luck with trigger and insemination! Sending all of the positive energy that I can muster to help this be your cycle!!! It sounds like you have a really good attitude though, and that's got to count for something!

@inthewoods23 Good luck! I hope you'll get a different take with this clinic / doctor.

@keikilove Anxiously awaiting update on how your u/s went!!! (And thank you for remembering about my question from last week; whenever you get a chance.)

@ramzlau 4.5 for AMH is really good; I hope YH SA comes back good. Was is normal for your IUI's?

@legallykate Good luck with HSG tomorrow! I hope yours will be like mine: only mildly uncomfortable and all clear.

akoros · August 2020

@ramzlau Thank you! As rough as it is, this is actually not that "bad" of a week, considering. I'm not sure if I listed out all the stuff that's been going on, but... **TW Loss**

May -- My parents come home from Florida to find that multiple pipes have burst, destroying parts of their house. Insurance will cover some of it, but they're not in a great place financially so it's rough. And also my dad came down with shingles, so it's all on my mom. Plus pandemic stress, as between them they have a ton of high risk conditions (GBS, diabetes, heart issues, high blood pressure, asthma, etc.)

June -- Husband's grandfather comes down in pneumonia, which at first we're told wasn't COVID-related, but then it is (his facility was full of it). Mid-month my dad is diagnosed with chronic myeloid leukemia (CML). As leukemias go it's a "good" one to get, as it's highly treatable if caught early (it was), but it's still cancer. Their house is also still a mess and insurance is being the typical hassle. The next week my husband's grandfather died of COVID. Because of COVID we have no idea when or if there will be a funeral, my MIL is still figuring it out.

July -- The week after Grandpa died my dad went into the hospital with uncontrolled bleeding (the CML medications plus medications for his a-fib thinned his blood too much). The week after that I went to my 16-week appointment to find out that there's no heartbeat. I have a D&E the following week, which is now two weeks ago.

So...it's been quiet for a couple of weeks, aside from picking up the pieces after our most recent loss. Not to minimize that at all, I'm just glad that nothing else is falling apart right now. Really hoping August sees things turn around, we basically had a year's-worth of personal tragedies in a little over a month between mid-June and mid-/late July.

kpearse99 · August 2020

@emeraldduchess thank you so much for the encouraging words. It means a lot

@bluetickgal Oh dear friend, I am so excited for this cycle for you!!! I think my hopes are just as high for you as yours are haha FX so hard that this does the magic trick!!

@keikilove YGPM!!!

@ramzlau I always forget, what should AMH be at? You are SO right... it is hard enough to get myself and my own heart in a good place, and so much harder to keep it together for him.

I know you get it

bbrahmbhatt · August 2020

@thegirlwhowaited_ Taking some time to focus on yourself is a great use of this time. Hopefully it will give you some space to figure out how you feel about everything and allow you to figure out how you want to proceed.

@kpearse99 it does help so much to have some support who know what you're going through. My husband and I know one couple who have struggled, but she and I don't regularly talk. None of my other IRL friends have struggled, so for me it has been so helpful to find you lovelies. It helps to know that you're not alone, and that we can support and encourage each other throughout this process.

@emeraldduchess thank you for the cheer! Are you going in for labs today? I'm so glad that your RE has a plan!

@bluetickgal yay for such great follies! FX so hard for you that this is the magic cycle!

@keikilove How did the baseline go? That is fascinating, and a little scary. My OB has said there's no other testing to be done for me at the time being. I assume the RE will order a bunch of labs? Are there things at this stage I should be asking for? I'm a pathology resident, so I sometimes struggle to advocate for myself and ask for tests when I am in the patient role, but MH has volunteered to be the mouthpiece if necessary.

@inthewoods23 I have wondered if I could have PCOS too. My cycles are regular, I get positive OPKs, my periods are pretty light and my TVUS only showed "physiologic follicles". I don't know if that rules it out for me though. It seems like there's a fair bit of contradictory information as far as what you use to diagnose it. I would be interested to hear the new RE's take on your status.

@akoros that is a really rough month. I'm glad you're having more good days than bad, but I think after going through all of that any and every emotion you have is valid. Sending you virtual *hugs*.

inthewoods23 · August 2020

@bbrahmbhatt I was looking up all sorts of uncommon signs of PCOS and anxiety and depression were mentioned. So that had me going all HMMMM now that I'm seeing a therapist. She's never suggested going on meds, but sometimes I wonder if it would be beneficial for me, even just for mental reasons and not so much reproductive. I did lose weight fairly quickly when I switched to gluten and dairy free so that doesn't really match as I believe it's more difficult to lose weight with PCOS. My periods has somewhat heavy for a day, maybe 2 but they are totally manageable so it's so hard to know. Basically it sounds like everyone is a little different in the symptoms they do have!

ramzlau · August 2020

@akoros That is a lot going on. 2020 has been a rough year here too. Hope you get a time of relief and rest.

@kpearse99 I never remember what AMH is supposed to be either. She just wanted above 1.5 if we wanted to try for unmedicated cycles, since we are running low on medicated options. (But a part of me wonders if the high AMH for my age is just another indicator of PCOS). Our Covid testing here is a bit insane with IUIs though, I have to be tested before we start treatment each cycle and H has to be tested not more than 2 days and not less than 24 hours before the IUI, so we are probably going for medicated so timing can be better controlled.

@acleverusername Hs count is always good for IUIs, but with the last SA almost a year ago his morphology was an 8. Still above the 5 mark that would be concerning, but retesting since it has almost been a year. And we retested my AMH because it has almost been a year for that as well and we have done 4 medicated cycles, so we wanted to confirm that it hadn't hit the cliff where it drops.

acleverusername · August 2020

@inthewoods23 & @bbrahmbhatt regarding PCOS, I'd picked up a pretty good book called "8 Ways to Reverse Your PCOS" which has a chapter with checklist that might indicate you have PCOS (it comes in SO many shapes and forms). That said, @bbrahmbhatt, why might you be thinking PCOS if your cycles are regular / you get positive OPKs?

Also @inthewoods23, definitely ask the RE about PCOS, but your egg yield from first retrieval seems on par for your age if your AMH is normal, so I wouldn't worry about it unless you have other symptoms (male pattern hair growth, u/s with evidence of pearl-string-like structure, irregular periods). Unfortunately there isn't a lot of data on egg retrieval only (data is usually mixed with live births from ER). However, I'm in another fertility forum (Modern Fertility) and there's an egg freezing channel there so I see a decent amount of ladies in late 20's / early 30's with normal AMH reporting 20-30 eggs per ER.

bbrahmbhatt · August 2020

@acleverusername I don't have any specific reasons for thinking PCOS, other than I am overweight. I have been working on that though and have recently lost 10% of my body weight, so hopefully that will help if it is an issue. My OB hasn't mentioned it, so I guess she's not that concerned either. I am a planner and I like to have all the possible information, which I realize may or may not be useful.

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