IF Testing & Treatment w/o 6.22

keikilove · June 2020

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation.

Diagnosis (if you've been):

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):

How are things going?:

Any questions?:

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)?

emeraldduchess · June 2020

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained IF, unexplained RPL, AMA, ovaries like to pull shenanigans

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): OPKs, BBT, checking CM, HIO, progesterone post-O

How are things going?: Ok. I'll test at the end of the week, then call my RE to pay the embryo testing fee so we can get IVF rolling once AF arrives (if they're starting up with treatment again). They require that you pay the lab fee up front, then you pay per embryo (up to 8).

Any questions?: No, I think I'm good for now.

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)? I want to see Hever Castle in England (Anne Boleyn's home), Australia, and the Netherlands. Specifically I want to see the annex where Anne Frank hid with her family.

inthewoods23 · June 2020

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained, low morph

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): EOD bed squeaking until O, supplements, GF and DF diet

How are things going?: For once I can actually say things are going well. DH is loving me in this mood. Let's just hope it sticks. Hope they week flies by! AF is due on Friday, but we're crossing fingers she's late

Any questions?: What's a great way to get the mind off SS because that has been strong over the weekend

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)? My number 1 is always Iceland, but specifically the geothermal baths. When we were there we only stayed at one for about 2 hours due to our itinerary but I'd love to make it an all day thing. A revisit to the grand canyon would be cool, and I'd probably like to visit a couple national parks like Yellowstone or Redwood.

kpearse99 · June 2020

@inthewoods23 I LOVE your update this morning!!! Hearing that you're in a good mood lately, makes me so happy! You deserve so many happy days

@emeraldduchess No word yet on if they are doing treatments again??

Diagnosis (if you've been):

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW, I think... I really don't know!! haha CD45 and nothing!

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Trying on our own.

How are things going?: Ehhh.... better today but this weekend hit me hard. The wine didn't help, I'm sure! haha I broke down Saturday night and on our way home from our friends house I cried to DH (again, thanks wine) about how I just don't think or know if I want to keep trying anymore. I mean, if it happens great, but I am so so close to just wanting to go on living my life and not think about TTC anymore. Even if HR corrects the mistake they made with the insurance, I don't know how many more IUIs, if any, I want to do anymore. So I'm in a weird place, I guess, but I'm content being there... if that makes sense? I could go on and on but I'm sure you get the gist.

Any questions?: Nope

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)? Iceland, Italy and France!

inthewoods23 · June 2020

@emeraldduchess hope you can start treatment soon!

@kpearse99 are your cycles normally this long? Also why does the world have to be so cruel and make us go through the many stages of grief a million times!?! Glad you're doing better, but it's totally okay to be overly emotional! Feel your feelings for as long as you need to

My new mantra is basically "Always be kind"

Always Be Kind Images Stock Photos Vectors Shutterstock

gingermama29 · June 2020

@emeraldduchess I hope you hear soon about when treatments are starting up again (and hopefully it's very soon!).

@inthewoods23 glad to hear things are going well! I definitely hope it continues and AF stays far, far away!

@kpearse99 hugs friend. That has to be such a difficult place to be in. I'm sorry you're struggling.

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): benched until August

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Taking BCP to balance hormones

How are things going?: Not much to update in terms of what going on while benched. I'm so grateful to not have any of the side effects I experienced last month going on, especially nausea. But my one year TTC milestone hits this week which has had me pretty down lately. I know far too many of you here know that pain oh too well. ☹️

Any questions?: Nope

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)?
All of the UK, France, and Germany are my top 3. Honorable mentions are Italy, Greece, and Japan.

kpearse99 · June 2020

@inthewoods23 Honestly, I don't know how to answer your question haha This is my 3rd cycle since my cyst and the first two were both 35 days long, so I thought I was getting back on a regular schedule but then NOPE haha. After my first loss in Fall of 2018 I was regular every 30 days for 7 months and then once I started with the RE last June my cycles were weird like this one is. This is all part of the reason why I think I'm nearing the end of wanting to actively try.
And yes!! I LOVE that mantra and basically try to live by it every day!

@gingermama29 I'm so happy to hear you don't have those gross side effects this time around! I'm sorry you're approaching the 1 year mark

I hope you can do something kind for yourself this week.

misshelen86 · June 2020

@emeraldduchess Glad you are ready to move to IVF but holding on to hope for you for your test this week! Are you doing PGS testing or something else? I like the idea of paying per embryo.. at our clinic it’s a set fee no matter how many embryos and it’s very expensive, so doesn’t really seem fair for those that get less embryos. I loved the Netherlands but we were only there for 1 day and we didn’t make it to Anne Frank’s house but definitely want to go back to see it.

@inthewoods23 So happy to hear you are in a good place! Keeping everything crossed for no AF. For me, physical activity is the best way to keep my mind from spinning out of control. Going for a long walk and listening to music, or doing yoga. And definitely staying away from the google rabbit hole. Ohh Iceland is on my list too!

@kpearse99 Sorry to hear that you had a break down. It’s a hard place to be in for sure and I can relate to just not wanting to go through this anymore.. it’s so painful. Whatever you decide will be the right thing

Sending hugs your way

@gingermama29 Glad you aren’t having side effects anymore. The one year milestone is such a punch in the gut. So excited you are getting close to being off the bench! August will be here before you know it.

Diagnosis (if you've been): MFI

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): Trying on our own.. hopefully IUI in July or August

How are things going?: So frustrated guys! We were supposed to go in today to sign our consent forms for IUI and our appointment was cancelled and re-scheduled for 2 weeks from today. There hasn’t been much over the last few months that brought me to tears, but this did. It’s not a big deal and 2 weeks isn’t that far away, it’s just the fact that I feel like there’s always obstacles and waiting has been the hardest part of this journey for me.. so it just really triggered some heavy emotions for me.

Any questions?: For anyone who has done natural IUI, how many did you try before you moved on to medicated?

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)? So many places! Italy, Greece and Australia are pretty high on my list though

emeraldduchess · June 2020

@kpearse99 so many hugs to you, my friend. I have meltdowns like that too where I'm ready to say "F this, I'm done". Feel all the feels. I know that whatever you choose will be the best for you and your family.

@inthewoods23 I'm glad you feel like you're in such a good place! I know you were feeling blah/meh for quite a while. Your travel list reminded me that there's a lot here in the USA that I have yet to see!

@misshelen86 OH NO! I am so sorry your appointment got cancelled. That sucks so much. I know 2 weeks is a short amount of time, but it definitely doesn't feel that way when your body is on a cycle. A 2 week delay can mean waiting another 2 weeks for the procedure. Hugs to you, friend.
We are doing the PGS testing. Because I'm AMA with 2 early losses, my RE strongly recommended it. They charge $2500 for lab fees then you pay per embryo. We had the option of a flat-fee for up to 8, though. We decided to pay per embryo because of my losses and the fact that we're just shy of 2 years TTC, I don't think more than 3 or 4 will make it to freeze and testing. My ovaries may respond well like they did on letrozole, but we need quality, not quantity.

@gingermama29 glad the side effects are gone! I'm sorry you're about to hit the 1 year mark. It sucks so much. Hugs to you, too.

inthewoods23 · June 2020

@gingermama29 yay for no side effects! Sorry to hear about the 1 year milestone

@kpearse99 ugh, bodies are so weird. I remember getting so excited after my 2nd cycle off BC because both were 33 days so the 29 day cycle that followed was so rude! haha. But cycles do have a slight wave pattern to them so I've always had some idea of how long they would be. Like when I'd have a 33 day cycle, I knew the next one would be a little shorter. The Flo app has bars representing cycle lengths and you can see the wave pattern. I'm curious to see how things will fluctuate now after being on and now off all those fertility meds.

@misshelen86 I really need to get my butt back into yoga! All last week I didn't do it at all but the week prior I had practiced 3 or 4 times. I'm just not consistent with it and I don't know why. Does the 2 week appointment delay also delay the IUI?

@emeraldduchess as much as I would love to basically have written Europe for my list, it's kind of nice to think of places that are "nearby". I'm in the Midwest so Yellowstone and Redwood would be TRIPS. DH and I have kind of considered one day driving out to visit our aunts who live in CO and then visiting my brother in AZ. That's a shit ton of driving though haha.

thegirlwhowaited_ · June 2020

@kpearse99 I had a similar moment this weekend. My sister-in-law made me feel like sh** this weekend I broke down crying to MH later that I'm not sure I can do IVF because of how bad my headaches get with hormones and because of the cost. I like what @inthewoods23 said. This process is all about different feelings to me and that is normal and healthy.

@inthewoods23 I'm glad you're in a good mood.

@emeraldduchess I found out today that my RE's office requires us to pay for the entire IVF cycle upfront. Including embryo cryopreservation.

@gingermama29 *creepy virtual hugs* I know this is easier said than done, but try to find something new to help take your mind off the milestone.

@misshelen86 I'm sorry your appointment got pushed out! I completely understand how it is to feel like you're always waiting for something. When we first went through testing before my RE's office would let us do our first IUI seemed like a million years.

Diagnosis (if you've been): Unexplained, suspected endometriosis

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IUI w/ 150mg Clomid, trigger (Ovidrel), and progesterone suppositories. Insemination was today.

How are things going?: Fine. Super crampy since Saturday, even before I did the trigger shot. I was really upset Saturday after my ultrasound and there was only 1 follicle because we were hoping to see 2 or 3. *TW* Then I found out my sister-in-law was announcing another pregnancy this weekend. I was even more pissed when she kept gloating about how they only tried 1 month and got KU. Not going to lie, I wanted to throat punch her all weekend. *end TW* So because of the 1 foli and my sister-in-law I'm not feeling too great/optimistic about this cycle. We also finally got the insurance breakdown for IVF. I know I should be grateful that our insurance has IF coverage, but it's still a lot of money all at once up front.

Any questions?: Not at the moment

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)?
Domestically, I'd love to see the Grand Canyon, Golden Gate Bridge, and the monuments in DC.
Internationally, I'd love to go to Ireland, Iceland, and Spain

inthewoods23 · June 2020

@thegirlwhowaited_ omg can I slap your SIL for you? WHO TF gloats about something like that?? RUDE

thegirlwhowaited_ · June 2020

@inthewoods23 be my guest. Now my mean thoughts feel justified.

gingermama29 · June 2020

@misshelen86 I'm sorry things got delayed. That's so frustrating! I hope these next two weeks fly by for you. Hugs friend.

@thegirlwhowaited_ ugh wtf to your SIL. You'd be more than justified in giving her a throat punch. Sorry she was so insensitive and braggy.

kpearse99 · June 2020

@misshelen86 ugh, oh man!!! Can't they email you the forms to sign electronically?!

@thegirlwhowaited_ oh geez, that is a stinger for sure from your SIL with her just gloating like that and carrying on. Does she know that you guys are having trouble? Not that it makes it any better, but it would certainly be worse if she did know and still kept throwing that in your face!

misshelen86 · June 2020

@emeraldduchess It definitely makes sense to do the testing. If we end up going through IVF we will be doing PGS as well and are also expected to get 3-4 embryos.

@inthewoods23 It’s amazing how much better I feel when I stay on top of my yoga practice. I’m hoping this won’t delay us doing IUI next month.. I’ll most likely be right at the end of my current cycle.

@thegirlwhowaited_ FX for this IUI. Hopefully it’s a really good quality follie and you will have success. As to your SIL, she deserves a throat punch for sure. You are so justified in your feelings. Does she know what you’re going through? If so, I would call her out on it so she is more aware in the future of what she says in front of you. So sorry you had to deal with that.

emeraldduchess · June 2020

@thegirlwhowaited_ a massive WTF and major side-eye to your SIL. That's awful she treated you like that. Lots of hugs to you. That's also crazy that you have to pay for the ENTIRE IVF cycle up front. Do they give you back any $$ if the embryos don't make it to freeze or if there is any other kind of failure with the cycle?

thegirlwhowaited_ · June 2020

@kpearse99 @misshelen86 She knows the entire story of our TTC and that we'd just had an ultrasound that morning. She is the baby and the favorite of MH's 5 siblings. I think she did it to be in the spotlight and not me. As though going through fertility treatments is a spotlight you want.

@emeraldduchess they'll credit back any cost not spent on monitoring appointments (like if I only need 4 instead of 5) and the freeze if we don't have any that need to be preserved. If we need a second round all the $ credited will roll over towards the next expenses. The freeze alone is $1,500 because it's excluded from insurance. Not sure how that compares to where you ladies are in the world.

emeraldduchess · June 2020

@thegirlwhowaited_ that makes me so angry that your SIL knows what you're going through and still said that. She needed the focus on her so badly that she was willing to be so hurtful? SMH.
That's good that you'll get credit towards another cycle if needed. I've found that coverage varies widely by state here in the US. Some of the ladies here have zero coverage and others have almost 100% (and even then the meds and copays are steep). I really hope that the lawmakers wake the heck up on this. IF is a medical condition that needs treatment. There's no excuse for zero coverage.

manillabar · June 2020

@inthewoods23 I'm glad you've been in a great mood lately! I definitely giggled at the "bed squeaking" lolol

@kpearse99 I am sending so much love your way. What a difficult crossroads you find yourself at. I'm hoping you can make a decision that feels right for you and brings you the most peace!

@gingermama29 glad this month is way better in terms of side effects. You're about halfway through the three months, right?

@misshelen86 ugh sorry that your appointment was postponed. I definitely understand your frustration. I would probably have cried too! Two weeks objectively isn't necessarily a long period of time but in the TTC world it sure does feel like it, especially when timing is crucial for everything.

@thegirlwhowaited_ ugh what a b*tchy thing for your SIL to do, especially knowing what you've been going through. Hope your IUI went well yesterday and that this is your month! It's frustrating to go through all of that and end up with one follicle, but hopefully it's a good one!

@emeraldduchess I hope your clinic is ready to start treatments back up again soon, but even more so, I hope you don't need it! my fingers are crossed for you!

manillabar · June 2020

Diagnosis (if you've been): high(ish) TSH, low morph, DOR

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): follistim + ovidrel+ IUI+prometrium

How are things going?: Well, I'm back on the progesterone, and now just waiting for beta next tuesday. Other than that, still trudging along in my regular life. I took this friday off so I'm looking forward to that. Plus, since next friday is the day off for 4th of july, I basically have two back to back three day weekends, which is nice!

Any questions?:

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)? I would love to see the northern lights, so wherever I can go for that - Alaska, Iceland, etc (I'm counting this as one destination); Italy, and Hawaii

mvt2003 · June 2020

Hi friends,

I'm not doing a full post this week, just wanted to update you all that beta came back as another CP. I'm sad and upset, since this is pretty much reliving the experience of last February, except this time no beta hell. Beta came back at 1, so I'm already out. I haven't spoken to the nurse yet, I've been stalking my patient portal all day.

I knew over the weekend the way this was headed, so I've had some time to prepare. I got a too-light positive FRER on Saturday, and it didn't get darker on Sunday and faded on Monday. I have my WTF appointment next week, and I've got a list of questions. I want to ask when we start more invasive testing on me, and if she says she thinks it was just another genetically abnormal embryo MH and I would like to transfer two next time.

Thank you all for all of your love and support throughout this transfer cycle. I'm going to take a couple of days not thinking about TTC to regroup, but I'll be back.

thegirlwhowaited_ · June 2020

@mvt2003 I'm so sorry, so many hugs for you.

misshelen86 · June 2020

@mvt2003 So sorry my friend. I’m so sad for you.. sending you lots of hugs

Take whatever time you need, feel all the feelings and we will be here when you are ready. I know it won’t fix things, but I hope you find something nice to do for yourself right now (I just indulged in a massage and a chocolate milkshake).

kpearse99 · June 2020

@mvt2003 oh girl, I am giving you so many hugs from afar!! You know my heart just breaks for you but I know that you are so strong and powerful and you will keep doing what you need to do to get your THB, which will be soon. I just know it. 💕💕💕💕

AFM - you all know i was pushing HR about the change in insurance and how they said coverage was the same but then that it didn’t cover fertility treatments at all. Well, I got amazing news today!!!! See the spoiler for the update!

Image: https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/l4/vfch0zuky6ei.jpeg

I don’t know what the coverage will be just yet but at least it’s something!!! Look at me winning today!!! Haha

thegirlwhowaited_ · June 2020

@kpearse99 that’s awesome! FX it’s good coverage!

legallykate · June 2020

I haven't posted here yet this week but @mvt2003 just want to say how sorry I am and send you

bluetickgal · June 2020

Diagnosis (if you've been): PCOS and Unexplained RPL

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO - CD1 over here.

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?): IUI#3...I asked this morning if I could up my Letrozole dose to 7.5mg, and they said yes!

How are things going?: I’ve been better, but I’m at least feeling better than I was on Monday after the BFN! I got really bummed out with it and needed to take some time away...I’m just so tired of failure after failure! This will be our last IUI...so I’m hoping it’s a success! DH and I have been talking a lot about our long term plan...we’ve got some big decisions to make if this next cycle is not a success, more on that later though.

Any questions?: None right now.

GTKY: In keeping with our recent travel topics: which top 3 destinations would you like to go to (countries or landmarks)? England, Ireland, and Italy! Would also love to see the Grand Canyon and just do more traveling within the US in general!

@emeraldduchess I hope you get a wonderful surprise today or tomorrow!! If not, I hope your clinic is open back up for treatment and you can move forward with IVF!

@inthewoods23 I’m so happy to hear that you are still in such a good mood! I’m hoping with everything in me that AF stays away and that good mood of yours gets even better!!! 🤞🏻

@kpearse99 I hate that you had a rough weekend...but I’m beyond excited that HR corrected the IF coverage issue! Just knowing you have the option for treatment again has to be a relief! I hope your cycle gets it’s act together soon!!

@gingermama29 I’m so glad you aren’t having the side-effects from the BC this month! I’m so sorry you are about to hit the 1-year milestone though...it’s sucks! Sending hugs your way! 💜 Hoping the next month flies by and you’ll be back off the bench!

@misshelen86 ugh friend...I’m so sorry for that delay!! Sounds like it was short notice with little explanation too, and that’s just not right!! I totally feel ya...this whole process is full of waiting, and it stinks that you have to wait even 2 more weeks...especially if that delays things even more depending on where you are in your cycle by then! I’m hoping they can get things straightened out and there won’t be a delay!

@thegirlwhowaited_ I’m so sorry for that news this weekend...and your SIL’s gloating!! Everything crossed that the 1 follie is all you need and that this cycle is a success!!

@manillabar enjoy those back-to-back 3-day weekends!! Everything possible crossed that you get the best news on Tuesday!! 🤞🏻

@mvt2003 friend...this is so freaking unfair, I’m so sorry and hurt for you!! Sending you all the 💜!! Take whatever time you need, and know that we are here for you when you are ready!!

kpearse99 · June 2020

@bluetickgal oh girl, I am SO happy you asked again about upping your dose and even happier they said yes! At this point you've been on the 5mg dose for awhile with no results, so it's good that you're able to switch it up a bit. I responded the best to 7.5mg of letrozole over any other dose and over clomid!

emeraldduchess · June 2020

@mvt2003 I am so, so sorry my sweet friend. Even when your gut tells you what's likely to happen, it's still awful and a terrible blow. Sending you all the hugs and love.

Image: https://media.giphy.com/media/3o7TKu8D1d12Eo9wSQ/giphy.gif

inthewoods23 · June 2020

@mvt2003 ugh nooo! I'm so sorry for another failed transfer 😢😢😢😢 take care and be good to yourself while you regroup ❤️❤️

SesshomaruMom · June 2020

@mvt2003 So sorry to hear about the failed transfer. Take the time you need to feel the feels.
@thegirlwhowaited_ WTF to your SIL! Wanting the spotlight or not, that was just rude.

Diagnosis: Unexplained IF
TWW/WTO/TTA: TWW
What we're doing this cycle: clomid, ovidrel, IUI
How are things going: Got two more days until the big test. Broke down yesterday, BFN. That really bummed me out. I've turned into a symptom spotting special snowflake; my mind is obsessing over every twinge.

gingermama29 · June 2020

@mvt2003 I haven't been able to post for a couple days cause TB is crazy glitchy but I wanted to say I'm so sorry friend. Sending hugs. 💕

keikilove · June 2020

I haven’t been able to take part in TTGP all week due to workload, but just couldn’t let time go by without saying @mvt2003 I have been thinking of and praying for you this week. I am so so sorry about the outcome of this last transfer. Having another chemical pregnancy is so heartbreaking. I am sending you light & positivity.💗 Take all the time you need to grieve and eventually regroup. Sending you hugs & comfort. ❤️🙏🏽😘

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