My tech warned me that it WOULD be in the report, and not to look at the report if I didn't want to know! :# but then at my F/u me appointment, the AS didn't come up at all lol 🤷 Luckily one of the doctors called and went over it with me over the phone, so it was fine
@older1sttime_mom2b I’m sorry they found an abnormality. I don’t have any experience with that specific issue but wanted to send you some love. I hope it’s an easy fix or something that can resolve in it’s own time.
I have been hesitant to update because I don't want to cause anyone more worry than necessary. But anyway I might as well share in case someone else here may be impacted.
Corona related birthplan stuff <div class="Spoiler">So I was informed at Friday's appointment that my Hospital, which is normally very vbac friendly, is not doing vbacs at this time, due to coronavirus. With the caveat of course, that if I were to come in in active labor, and the baby is coming, then we would just proceed. But if I were to come in past my due date, they would be scheduling a section, rather than any other induction methods. The reasoning being that if they can just put in an epidural and do an uncomplicated section, that has a much lower risk of switching to an emergent situation where they have to put the mother under <i>general anesthesia</i>, which would create a much higher covid-19 for the staff if the mother were asymptomatic, let's say.
Now they still can't <i>force</i> you to have surgery, so you can of course decline the surgery. My midwife said she has had two mothers who went in in the same position, declined, and were still able to deliver vaginally, and two other mothers that still ended up getting the section, but it was fine. Now all that to say, a lot could change between now and August, but in the meantime, I have my vbac clearance appointment scheduled with the Ob three-ish weeks from now, as well as a consult with the Anesthesia Department chair, both by phone.</div> So the goal is still do everything we can at home to be in good shape to labor, and do all the natural induction methods at home that we can so that things start to happen on their own, but this just adds another layer to it. And it's frustrating to say the least, because I already switched practices and hospitals to a place where I felt would be more supportive of an intervention free labor and delivery, and now that could all be out the window over something completely out of my control. So for the time being, I'm trying just not to stress about it and figure out what I need to do at home to be as prepared as possible.
@BusinessWife I’m sorry... hopefully your plan goes smoothly and you still get your Vbac... Actually hopefully things are different in August and they’ll go back to being supportive of vbacs! I’ve really put off thinking about the actual birth because everyday is something new
@BusinessWife I'm on the edge of eligibility for VBAC, I was told if I showed up in good active labor they wouldn't stop me, but the moment things started to look a little questionably they would call it. I knew going into this that VBAC was slim for me even with the most positive outlooks so my heart has been just more open to section the whole way through. I'm still maybe slightly hoping something magical will happen and I'll just get to do this the ol' fashioned way, but I'm reminding myself that a healthy mommy and a healthy baby are the best birth outcomes and none of the other bits will matter in the end. I'll be thinking about you though and I'll have all my fingers crossed for you. I'm so jealous of my friends who have got to do this the "normal" way, and it makes me sad to think it's something I won't ever get to experience.
@BusinessWife I'm sorry you are going through this! I really hope that things change by August and this will all just be a moot point. Praying you'll get your VBAC that you have your heart set on.
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@fitandnerdy Sounds like you had a great experience! That’s awesome the sex wasn’t recorded. You were so brave to stare at the screen the whole time haha. She told me I definitely didn’t want to look right away since baby’s legs were splayed and she had a great view so I’m glad I didn’t see that. Then a couple times she went back on the screen to review the photos she’d taken and she told me to look away then as well (I’m guessing because she had labeled each photo and so some of the first photos must have been labeled with the sex or the body part). Yours sounds like my us with my second daughter. I so badly wanted to know the sex so my husband and I were staring at the screen the whole time and when we left neither of us thought she’d even looked at the sex. We hadn’t even noticed but the sex was in our report so obviously she had, just really quickly.
@BusinessWife yah, I really didn’t expect to be that nervous or uncomfortable in there but I was. Ugh. It’s too bad I wasn’t able to enjoy it BUT baby had all its fingers and toes and the one profile I saw of baby’s face was adorable I’m hoping they didn’t record the sex in my report... I have a midwife appointment today and it’s with a midwife I’ve never met before so I’m going to make sure she knows right away before opening the report that I don’t want to know. Yet another stress though, if it’s in the report and she sees it and slips up!
Also, @BusinessWife, regarding your vbac post, my hospital’s latest policy is if you are going for a vbac it is very strongly recommended that you get an epidural to reduce the chances of needing to be intubated during an emergency c section. I hope you get your vbac!!!
@BusinessWife I am so sorry that this madness may impact your birth plans. I will be praying that everything falls just right for you and that you’re able to have the vbac you desire.
I’m growing increasingly more frustrated with the long lasting damage that is being done to mothers during this pandemic. I wholeheartedly believe we should protect our medical staff to the full extent of our abilities but some of these things are crossing lines that can’t be uncrossed.
The unpreparedness by seemingly every last line of defense (hospitals, local officials, our government, etc) is absolutely unforgivable. I’m so mad for everyone.
Maybe I should have saved this rant for WTF Wednesday 😝 sorry, ladies, I’m just so heartbroken.
@laur84ns, honestly, no. I've never given it a thought. Typically, they tell us not to look when they first find the baby because they don't know the position, and then again when they look at the urinary tract and such. I've never noticed them slip. It's never included in the report if you elect not to find out, so my midwives don't even know. But, I frequently don't even know what I'm looking at. I posted this once before, but with this baby, I asked, "oh, is that the head?" "No, that's your cervix." The randos who post crotch shots and "uh, is my doctor wrong?" I literally have no idea. If you hadn't told me I was looking at the crotch, I wouldn't have been able to tell. And even if it's kind of clear that, ok, those are legs so obviously, there's a penis or vagina where those two legs meet, I can't tell. At all. I've had people describe what a penis vs. vagina looks like on an ultrasound or tell me what to look for, and I just can't see it when looking at a picture. So I think I could watch the whole ultrasound and never figure it out.
ETA: also, I wouldn't be surprised if they train ultrasound techs to speak about the baby like "the baby's head" or "the arm" rather than "his/her arm" regardless of if the parents find out or not so they'll have that habit just in case.
I'm sorry, @businesswife. That's horrible, and I will pray you will get your VBAC.
tyrion_, I completely agree.
Ugh, I was upset about the way we handle labor and delivery in the US and much of the developed world before covid, and I'm even moreso now.
@BusinessWife This hits so hard for me as I hope and pray for my second VBAC. So far, my facility hasn't mentioned anything like this, but if they do, I will be heartbroken. I really don't want to labor at home for long this time, since that all worked out so well with DD, but I also don't want to be given an ultimatum upon arrival. It almost seems like a punishment for being pregnant. Like a let's-just-get-this-done-and-over-with-because-you're-wasting-my-time kind of mentality. Ugh. What a frustrating time to be pregnant.
I'm sorry for this news, and I will remain hopeful that you get your VBAC experience. I seriously don't know why we're so surgery happy in this country. I recognize there are life and death situations, but damn. Birth is not generally an emergency.
Try to keep your chin up, girl. We can only pray that the clouds will part by August, but at this point, I'm not incredibly optimistic. 😔
This treatment of mothers I just can't understand the logic. Like disallowing any birth partners. Maybe someone who has had a hospital birth can enlighten me. Are you ever left alone during labor? At my birth center, I am never left alone. The midwives will leave for half an hour or an hour so it's just my H and I, but if he needed to go grab some food from the fridge, he is supposed to call for them, not just leave me for 5 minutes. I can't imagine leaving a laboring woman alone. So wouldn't that mean more staff time and thus more staff to attend and be exposed to the mother when you disallow a partner?
I legitimately can't understand requiring a CS. Statistically, a significant majority of women who do try for a VBAC are successful. Some statistics have it as high as 80%. A CS means a longer hospital stay and thus fewer beds for sick people and more staff needed to attend to the mother for that longer length of time. Considering how successful it usually is, I don't see how a VBAC isn't preferred. I don't see how those numbers wouldn't balance out - a guaranteed hospital stay that is three times as long vs. a shorter hospital stay as much as 80% of the time and occasionally that longer stay (ETA: and additional people exposed in an unplanned CS) when the VBAC isn't successful.
And for some women, this is a huuuuuge issue that essentially boils down to doctors dictating to women how big their families can be since the number of CS you can have is usually limited, and VBA2C are even rarer than VBACs.
Thank you @lachnessmomster ❤️ good news is, I think in your case my hospital would be favorable. She actually used the term, "proven pelvis" 🤦 but anyway since you have had one successful vbac, they would not be so concerned. Woot?
@coldlife2 I know, it's maddening. We talked about the hypothetical vba2c and of course that's like another animal. She mentioned the <i>plausible</i> difference between someone who had had the second C due to a situation like this, vs. someone who had the baby get stuck in her pelvis (twice). Or say with the first, the difference between having baby present breech, vs. having stalled or gotten stuck. So in theory they say they can have a more balanced thought process, but to me, it's all a bunch of happy hoo-ha, if when the rubber meets the road, the mother still ends up steamrolled. 😡
I had my appointment yesterday and all is doing well! Blood results were mostly in range but I have to get monthly blood work anyway. Ultrasound was great baby has amazing blood flow (I have a blood antibody that can attack babies so they closely monitor the both of us) Still considered too high risk for virtual appointments since I get blood work at all visits. Next appointment at 28 weeks will include my GD test but they will allow me to wait in an exam room instead of the lobby so I have less exposure risk and the hospital the office is at is under strict regulation to have no ER patients with covid or flu like symptoms So I actually feel safe going in. Also had another talk about the chances of a bigger baby and was reassured they will keep a close eye on our measurements so I don't have as much damage as the first time around.
I had a brief in person midwife appointment yesterday and we went over my anatomy scan results. They had included the sex on there, but fortunately since I asked right away if it was in there, the receptionist who printed the copy off was able to scratch it out with a jiffy marker. Phew. Another close call haha. Anyways, the important thing is everything looked normal and my blood test results for trisomies and Down syndrome all came back low risk too. What a relief.
However I had a more in depth phone appointment with the midwife today (yesterday was really for checking blood pressure and hearing baby’s heartbeat) and she went over the bloodwork that my family dr had ordered in my first trimester. He had told me all my results were normal but upon the midwife’s review, that wasn’t the case. My iron levels are too low and my thyroid level is out of control! I am so annoyed, mad, stressed.... I have a sluggish thyroid and am on medication for it which is why my dr checked it in my first trimester, to make sure it was still ok. He told me over the phone that it was normal but my midwife gave me the actual value (this was from early Jan) and it was nearly double the highest recommended level! Ugh. So it’s likely been out of control the whole first half of my pregnancy. Very upsetting. Going to get my thyroid and iron levels rechecked tomorrow and get this all sorted.
Also my midwife told me they are no longer offering the glucose tolerance test for gestational diabetes (the sweet drink) due to the coronavirus. Our health authority doesn’t want pregnant moms sitting around for an hour at a blood collection lab. Apparently they’re offering a series of two blood tests instead but my midwife only found out a couple days ago, has never heard of these tests as a replacement for the GTT and doesn’t know how accurate they are. So when I get to 28 weeks I’ll check back in and decide if I even want to bother with the blood tests or just decline it all. Interesting. I’ve always done the GTT in the past but have always been negative. Has anyone else heard of this??
@BusinessWife I'm so sorry about what you were told re: VBAC. I know we are all trying to roll with the punches and behind these rules there is usually some science and logic (key word: some), but they get applied in situations where they can hurt rather than help and I understand all the disappointment and frustration. To clarify, would they schedule the CS right at/after 40 weeks or will you have some grace period beyond that to (hopefully!) go into labor on your own? I know 2nd babies generally come a bit sooner, but I like your odds even better if they'll let you push it to 41+ weeks or so.
Just got the call to confirm my anatomy scan for tomorrow. They indicated they were "reminding" me that no guests would be allowed, but of course this is the first time they're communicating that. I knew to expect it (and we have no one to watch DS anyway), but I also know there are probably moms out there that don't have friends going through this and aren't already aware, and how crushing to find that out the day before!
I took the morning off so I could go get a takeout croissant and coffee afterward and hopefully make this special in a small way. I feel a little bad because DH will be stuck here taking care of DS all morning, but this may very well be the last time I see the LO before arrival day and it needs to be an occasion!
I had another ultrasound as a follow up for the AS a couple of weeks ago. I am 23 weeks and 2 days today - they told me everything is measuring great and just on target. I was also relieved to find out I only gained 3 lbs in the last four weeks - I was expecting more like 10 lbs or so.
That being said I have to go in for another ultrasound in two weeks. They were able to measure almost all points with the heart today, with the exception of two. So I am scheduled for 5/6 to come in again and they will try to get that with the ultrasound before the rib cage is hardening too much and they wouldn't see it anymore.
I was honestly so relieved that everything seemed okay, that it didn't register that they still were not able to get all images. Do I need to be concerned? Or is this more common that it takes several attempts to get the heart fully measured?
@strawberryfields82, I don't know that it's super common (I've never needed a follow-up with any of my pregnancies), but I also don't think it's super rare. I've definitely heard of it happening, and I don't think it's a red flag.
@strawberryfields82 I would be alarmed if they were having you come back because the measurements weren’t lining up or were concerning. I think and hope it sounds like you just have a stubborn little one who doesn’t want to give the right views. I’m sure they would tell you if it was otherwise. Hopefully they can get whAt they need. I understand your concern though, I’d likely be the same.
TTC1: May 2015
Primary IF May 2016; Failed HSG; Scheduled Lap Sept. 2016
@laur84ns that’s surprising to me about the GTT. My MD has me drink it at home and then come in just in time for the blood test. I’m sorry you’re stressed about your thyroid. I have thyroid issues and my MD is always chasing my TSH around while pregnant by changing my dose. I’ve found my endocrinologist is much better than my OB or primary MD. Try not to stress too much about it, if things look good on the ultrasound at this point then there likely wasn’t any negative impact.
@strawberryfields82 I had to go back for another scan at 22 weeks because they couldn’t get clear shots of my baby’s heart. I’ll be going back again for another scan in a couple weeks to check my baby’s kidney. I panicked when my doctor told me I had to go back for extra scans. She assured me not to worry. I found being asked to go back for more measurements after having an anatomy scan is quite common.
@laur84ns my MW does the same as @tara4910 I have it already at home, ready to take an hour before my 28w appointment.
@emiliadkay Thanks, yeah I'm not sure. I guess that's a good conversation to have if we start to get closer and things haven't changed. I went to 41+4 with DD, so I hope this one comes before then! I thought under normal circumstances they would prefer to let me go on my own, but not sure when they would typically be booking an induction, being a new (to me) practice. Good question tho!
@strawberryfields82 I had to get several scans with ds2 because he would never cooperate. I wouldn't stress too much, especially if they haven't mentioned anything wrong.
@BusinessWife can you tell your OB you plan to have at least 4 babies? I've heard they typically won't recommend more than 3 CS because it weakens your uterus each time, so maybe they will give an exception in that case and let you try for the VBAC.
@emiliadkay I also took myself out for coffee and pastries after my A/S! It was my first time out of the house in weeks so I went a little overboard and got one of everything.
@tara4910@BusinessWife that’s so interesting, when my midwife told me they were no longer doing the GTT because of the hour wait at the lab, I asked why we couldn’t just take the drink home and come in around the 1 hour mark. Then I said oh wait, I know why - they want to take blood right before, have you drink the drink and then take your blood an hour later. She said that was part of it but mostly it’s because the point of the test is to see what your body goes with all that glucose when your body is at rest. When you do it at the lab you’re always instructed to sit around rather than get your and move/walk. She said by taking it at home, walking around your home for an hour, getting in the car, walking into the lab from the parking lot, etc that your body would naturally burn all the glucose anyway and it would defeat the purpose of the test. Did either of your dr’s mention that to you?! So strange. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that different places do it differently but I still kind of am. Haha.
@BusinessWife I'm sorry that is the line that your hospital is currently
taking. I'm also desperately hoping for a VBAC. I've got my VBAC clinic appointment
in two weeks, so I guess I'll find out then. I really can’t understand some of
the decisions that are being made at the moment and I don’t know how the
complete lack of care and disregard for pregnant mothers can be justified.
@laura84ns I don't understand why they are recording the sex
if you said you didn't want to find out. Quite frankly it's none of their business.
@cornichonmam where I delivered my first, the MFM sat in on the anatomy scans. He said everything was recorded on their records so that if anything was wrong (baby came out with issues) they can go back and review if it was a mistake on their anatomy scan or truly unknown. 🤷♀️
TTC1: May 2015
Primary IF May 2016; Failed HSG; Scheduled Lap Sept. 2016
@sarah0985@cornichonmam Hmm it’s an interesting point... I’ve never really thought about it because I wanted to know the sex with my two daughters. When my midwife told me this time around that we could ask them not to report the fetal sex I got excited. She said there was no real reason for them to report it in the first place but that they usually do (even when asked not to). I guess I don’t see why they couldn’t just write “normal genitalia” or something, to indicate they looked, and that everything appeared normal, without writing what the sex is. KWIM?
@laur84ns so interesting that it’s different! For the 1 hour GTT they don’t test my glucose before drinking the beverage, only at the 1 hr point. As for burning off the glucose, I never really thought about that. I plan to just drink it and drive over like 30 mins later because the office isn’t super close to my house so I guess I won’t be that active. 🤷🏼♀️
I had a midwife appt yesterday and all is well with baby boy! I love getting to hear the heartbeat via Doppler. Next appt (and glucose testing) will be in five weeks.
@BusinessWife 41+4! You're a trooper. I went to 41+2 with DS and snuck him in two days before my scheduled induction, which I had to fight pretty hard to hold off that long. FX this next baby gets the show on the road a little sooner (and that it's the start of a lifetime of him or her taking things easy on you!).
At my ultrasound, the sex is recorded and the sonographer and radiologist know, it's just not in the report and transmitted to my midwives.
They said it's for a couple of reasons. Certain conditions are more common in boys or more common in girls. So if they suspect your baby has a condition that is almost never found in girls, and you're having a girl, they can almost entirely rule out that condition. Also,
death and maybe grossness TW
they said they've once or twice had it where a baby has died in utero and the baby had decomposed enough by the time the woman's next appointment rolled around that they could not tell the sex. And the parents then wanted to know what their baby was.
@laur84ns It's weird how different things are at different practices. With DD, my Dr had me drink it at home an hour before my appointment and then come in for the draw and didn't say anything about restricting my activity. My current practice normally has you drink the glucose at the office and then sends you off to the hospital lab (next door) for the draw. Because of COVID-19 concerns now they just have someone do the blood draw in the office and later transfer it to the lab.
@strawberryfields82 I had to go back for them to get additional scans of DD's heart because she wasn't cooperating. I think that's pretty normal! She's totally healthy FWIW.
@BusinessWife It seems so crazy to me that they won't allow VBACs currently! I feel like people who are pregnant right now have already had to give up so much during this crisis. It seems like hospitals are kind of making things up as they go along since this is uncharted territory. I hope things ease up in time for you to have the birth plan you want!
I had my GD test last week and the results were good. But being in the doctor's office was a huge anxiety inducer for me.
Covid related reasons:
During the hour I had to wait to get my blood drawn they kept bringing people right past me who were coughing and I believe were being tested for the Coronavirus. This whole situation was just too much for me to handle. I didn't know what to do at the time and afterwards I just had a breakdown. Just thinking that I'm there for a simple test but I am putting my baby at so much risk was just overwhelming. The whole ordeal just put me in a funk for the next few days.
Re: April appointments
Corona related birthplan stuff
<div class="Spoiler">So I was informed at Friday's appointment that my Hospital, which is normally very vbac friendly, is not doing vbacs at this time, due to coronavirus. With the caveat of course, that if I were to come in in active labor, and the baby is coming, then we would just proceed. But if I were to come in past my due date, they would be scheduling a section, rather than any other induction methods. The reasoning being that if they can just put in an epidural and do an uncomplicated section, that has a much lower risk of switching to an emergent situation where they have to put the mother under <i>general anesthesia</i>, which would create a much higher covid-19 for the staff if the mother were asymptomatic, let's say.
Now they still can't <i>force</i> you to have surgery, so you can of course decline the surgery. My midwife said she has had two mothers who went in in the same position, declined, and were still able to deliver vaginally, and two other mothers that still ended up getting the section, but it was fine. Now all that to say, a lot could change between now and August, but in the meantime, I have my vbac clearance appointment scheduled with the Ob three-ish weeks from now, as well as a consult with the Anesthesia Department chair, both by phone.</div>
So the goal is still do everything we can at home to be in good shape to labor, and do all the natural induction methods at home that we can so that things start to happen on their own, but this just adds another layer to it. And it's frustrating to say the least, because I already switched practices and hospitals to a place where I felt would be more supportive of an intervention free labor and delivery, and now that could all be out the window over something completely out of my control. So for the time being, I'm trying just not to stress about it and figure out what I need to do at home to be as prepared as possible.
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
ETA: also, I wouldn't be surprised if they train ultrasound techs to speak about the baby like "the baby's head" or "the arm" rather than "his/her arm" regardless of if the parents find out or not so they'll have that habit just in case.
I'm sorry, @businesswife. That's horrible, and I will pray you will get your VBAC.
tyrion_, I completely agree.
Ugh, I was upset about the way we handle labor and delivery in the US and much of the developed world before covid, and I'm even moreso now.
I'm sorry for this news, and I will remain hopeful that you get your VBAC experience. I seriously don't know why we're so surgery happy in this country. I recognize there are life and death situations, but damn. Birth is not generally an emergency.
Try to keep your chin up, girl. We can only pray that the clouds will part by August, but at this point, I'm not incredibly optimistic. 😔
I legitimately can't understand requiring a CS. Statistically, a significant majority of women who do try for a VBAC are successful. Some statistics have it as high as 80%. A CS means a longer hospital stay and thus fewer beds for sick people and more staff needed to attend to the mother for that longer length of time. Considering how successful it usually is, I don't see how a VBAC isn't preferred. I don't see how those numbers wouldn't balance out - a guaranteed hospital stay that is three times as long vs. a shorter hospital stay as much as 80% of the time and occasionally that longer stay (ETA: and additional people exposed in an unplanned CS) when the VBAC isn't successful.
And for some women, this is a huuuuuge issue that essentially boils down to doctors dictating to women how big their families can be since the number of CS you can have is usually limited, and VBA2C are even rarer than VBACs.
@coldlife2 I know, it's maddening. We talked about the hypothetical vba2c and of course that's like another animal. She mentioned the <i>plausible</i> difference between someone who had had the second C due to a situation like this, vs. someone who had the baby get stuck in her pelvis (twice). Or say with the first, the difference between having baby present breech, vs. having stalled or gotten stuck. So in theory they say they can have a more balanced thought process, but to me, it's all a bunch of happy hoo-ha, if when the rubber meets the road, the mother still ends up steamrolled. 😡
Just got the call to confirm my anatomy scan for tomorrow. They indicated they were "reminding" me that no guests would be allowed, but of course this is the first time they're communicating that. I knew to expect it (and we have no one to watch DS anyway), but I also know there are probably moms out there that don't have friends going through this and aren't already aware, and how crushing to find that out the day before!
I took the morning off so I could go get a takeout croissant and coffee afterward and hopefully make this special in a small way. I feel a little bad because DH will be stuck here taking care of DS all morning, but this may very well be the last time I see the LO before arrival day and it needs to be an occasion!
That being said I have to go in for another ultrasound in two weeks. They were able to measure almost all points with the heart today, with the exception of two. So I am scheduled for 5/6 to come in again and they will try to get that with the ultrasound before the rib cage is hardening too much and they wouldn't see it anymore.
I was honestly so relieved that everything seemed okay, that it didn't register that they still were not able to get all images. Do I need to be concerned? Or is this more common that it takes several attempts to get the heart fully measured?
@emiliadkay Thanks, yeah I'm not sure. I guess that's a good conversation to have if we start to get closer and things haven't changed. I went to 41+4 with DD, so I hope this one comes before then! I thought under normal circumstances they would prefer to let me go on my own, but not sure when they would typically be booking an induction, being a new (to me) practice. Good question tho!
@emiliadkay I also took myself out for coffee and pastries after my A/S! It was my first time out of the house in weeks so I went a little overboard and got one of everything.
@laura84ns I don't understand why they are recording the sex if you said you didn't want to find out. Quite frankly it's none of their business.
They said it's for a couple of reasons. Certain conditions are more common in boys or more common in girls. So if they suspect your baby has a condition that is almost never found in girls, and you're having a girl, they can almost entirely rule out that condition. Also,
death and maybe grossness TW
Covid related reasons:
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