July 2020 Moms
meanjellybean
member
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March STM+ check in
meanjellybean
member
I always seem to be the one anxious to post this check-in because my child seems to be extra difficult at the beginning of every month!
EDD/Weeks + Days:
How old is/are your other kid(s)?
Any questions/concerns?
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
EDD/Weeks + Days:
How old is/are your other kid(s)?
Any questions/concerns?
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
Re: March STM+ check in
How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD will be 20 months next week
Any questions/concerns? We are trying to introduce the idea of a brother, and she just keeps saying “no no no” every time we bring it up. It is hilarious, but at the same time, I think I have given up on her having any concept that her brother is coming. Soooo not really a question or concern, more a statement.
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD will be 2 on Thursday!!!
Any questions/concerns? Good lord, I know we have discussed timing around potty training but I'm ready to do it now just because the diaper change battles have gotten so ridiculous! We don't even change her that often but I'm not willing to let her sit in her poop for hours (she doesn't care, she totally would) so she gets a rash. But it has devolved into whenever we have to change her, it's now a 15-20 minute battle with SO much crying/screaming/hitting. If we have nowhere to be, I let her tantrum it out and just tell her to let me know when she's ready. But when we have to get somewhere, like this morning, I feel like we have no choice but to hold her down which feels awful for everyone involved. And now it's not just diaper changes but doing anything she doesn't want to do (I know, this is all typical, developmentally appropriate toddler behavior). Like yesterday we were going to this place where she likes to play but we needed to get in the car to drive there. We walked outside (it was very cold), and she decided she wanted to go for a walk instead, so it turned into me standing there outside my car while she sat on the sidewalk and screamed and cried for 10 minutes before letting me get her in the car. Then she was fine lol. So no questions/concerns, just struggling with this behavior which I assume continues for at least another year, and I know adding a sibling will probably just ramp it up more.
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)? DD is definitely very sensitive, which I think she gets from her father. She has always needed a while to "warm up" to the room if it's more than just me and DH around. Then she becomes very social and silly, but she does it on her terms. She has these beautiful blue eyes which she gets from my side, although DH's eyes are green so it would be cool if this baby gets those! Also I have super straight hair and DD got that too. I know this is coming from someone who has never had to deal with curly hair, but I'd love for this baby to get some of the cute curls that DH had when he was little.
ETA that something DD has gotten from me, is that she is very observant. I mean, maybe she's just the regular level of observant but compared to DH, she is VERY observant lol. DH will ask "where are my keys?" When they are literally right in front of him. Or another example, I notice people's cars, kind of in a creepy way, like I'll see a car driving by and in my head be like "that's so and so's car" and it turns out to be them. DH could pass me in his car on the road and literally have no idea (it's happened several times before lol). Whereas DD will see a Jeep coming down the road and go "Jeep!" and get it right. How does she know?? She can't read!
How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD is now 16 months
Any questions/concerns? @meanjellybean solidarity on the diaper changing situ. She now hates getting her butt changed, I'm getting better at the standing diaper change, which is just not always practical, so the diaper changing frequency has decreased. She is also not the least bit concerned about having a dirty diaper. No solutions, only solidarity.
I'm still so tired, and I'm starting to wonder how I will survive with 2 humans under 2. I'm planning on taking an 18 month mat leave this time, so on weekday evenings when I only spend 2.5 hours with DD and am counting down the minutes for bedtime I think to myself "how will I make it through full days with 2 kids for a year and a half??!".
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
My DD is a ginger just like her dad. I was/ still am shocked that the red hair prevailed because there are absolutely no redheads anywhere in my family tree. I hope the next kid is a ginger too, but I'm not holding my breath lol. She is also a showboat like her dad. He was always the class clown (and still is, he's a teacher lol). She loves to be the center of attention, and will yell at strangers if they're not paying attention to her. I don't know if my husband's annoying qualities (not listening to me, squirreling things away as a clean up method, etc.) can be passed down, but I hope not lol.
How old is/are your other kid(s)? DD turns 2 in a few weeks!
Any questions/concerns? If you could only have one of these, which would you choose? An OB you love who has gone above and beyond with your care or a hospital you love that has a lot of support for the type of birth you're hoping for? I feel like that's what I'm having to choose between and it suuucks. I'm currently leaning toward the hospital making more of a difference in the overall birth experience (I mean... who even knows if my OB would be the one to deliver this baby), but I'm curious to hear what others think.
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
DD is definitely a leader and social butterfly, which she 100% gets from MH. I'm glad she inherited those traits of his, but she also is a huge book lover which is all me. Looks-wise, I think she's a pretty even mix of the two of us! I hope this baby (and DD) inherit my patience but not my anxious tendencies and MH's ability to make everyone feel like an instant friend but not his driving aggressiveness.
@meanjellybean ahhhh that diaper battle sounds awful. I'm sorry! I'm also having a mental battle about trying to just force PT on DD or wait for her to show some interest... I'm normally a "rip the bandaid off" type parent, but I feel like it could backfire in this instance. I'm not really interested in having to do laundry daily and take 5 pairs of underwear and pants everywhere we go. How about you try it and let me know how it goes
@mrsdrez lol I'm dying picturing a 16 month old yelling at strangers for not paying attention to her!
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 3yo
Any questions/concerns? none right now!
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
From a looks perspective, I think DD is probably a good mix of both of us? I was very long and lean as a baby/toddler and so is she... so maybe she'll have my body-shape? From a personality perspective, she's all DH. I was a social butterfly and just generally a chill, easy, kid. DD is very shy... like, she's reserved around anyone but us and my mom at first. She's also very cautious. It took her until 15mo to take steps because she was just too timid. When she finally walked, she was immediately proficient at it lol. It's great for us because we don't really have to worry about her hurting herself... but also, it would be nice if she'd just jump right in with new friends to play (so we could hang with their parents) and didn't need hand holding with so much stuff. But, I hope this means she'll grow up to be as cool headed as he is.
For the new baby, I hope he's outgoing! I hope he loves new people and, even if it means more stress for us, I hope he's a little less reserved than DD. I hope he loves sleep (just like DD and DH). If I could end up with another baby that sleeps in until 2 in the afternoon, I wouldn't hate it lol.
@meanjellybean ugh... girl. The most unfortunate part of the timing for you (with the big tantrums and such) is that you can't have wine.
@stlbuckeye132 I'd go with the hospital as long as you feel confident in the doctor's clinical ability. To your point, it's likely that your OB won't deliver the baby and, unless you had some reason to be really special during pregnancy last time, I bet you'll just have the normal, boring, visits this time too. The hospital staff is where it's at. They're going to be the ones to help you advocate for yourself (or not) during labor... when advocating is harder.
@stlbuckeye132 I agree with what @blaf322 says about hospital staff. That's so true and would probably be the deciding factor for me too. Good luck with your decision!
How old is/are your other kid(s)? Ds1 will be 6 in June, DS2 will be 4 in May; we also care for my niece who will be 8 in May
Any questions/concerns? not today. But I'm sure tomorrow
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
Both my boys are negotiators, which I love. They get this from their father and its awesome. However, it's gone a bit far with my niece, who likes to argue with you like a peer. So while I love the trait my husband's family brings to the mix, I think I would be okay having one kid who is more laid back like me.
@stlbuckeye132 I agree with the others, I prioritize hospital over dr. Legitimately switched drs when I found out I was expecting with my first because I wanted private rooms and free wifi. This time I choose a hospital with the above and was known for being celiac safe (just so happens to be the same hospital)
How old is/are your other kid(s)? 2 next week! 😭
Any questions/concerns? None DS related at the moment
GTKY: What's a quality that your kid(s) have gotten from you or their father that you love? Any that you don't necessarily love? What qualities are you hoping this baby inherits from you or your SO and are there any that you'd love to skip a generation (or two)?
In terms of traits I want my baby to inherit... okay, I feel bad saying this, but part of me has always wanted a boy (just found out we're having a boy!) to see what kind of athlete he can be. I'm equally excited to see what my girls can do, but kind of wanted the chance to see it on both sides. I've always been really coordinated and a pretty fast long-distance runner. My husband is amazingly fast (when he's injury-free, which is not right now unfortunately) and comes from a family of insane athletes (there are newspaper clippings on like everyone in the family from some point in their life regarding their athletic accomplishments). So I'm eager to see what my kids can do there! While also recognizing that they might all devote their lives to non-athletic endeavors, like theatre, science, watching tv all day and eating cheetos...
On the flip side, my husband couldn't read a book to save his life (he reads a lot, but doesn't have the focus / patience for that kind of thing)... so I'm hopeful that my kids are more into that kind of thing. So far DD1 is obsessed with reading, so I have high hopes for that.
But I don't like to dwell too much on this stuff, because I figure they're just going to turn out how they're going to turn out, and not much I can do about it in most capacities.
This meme is my life.
Saturday was SO bad with DD. I decided I'm done with her shit. She had privileges taken away for poor behavior/not listening and was sent to/put in her room when she was pitching a fit so badly we couldn't even speak to her about her behavior. I wasn't willing to be around her while she acted like that. Sunday was SO much better because she knew we were serious and, although we had to give a warnings here and there, she checked herself and her behavior was exactly what I'd expect from a normal, well behaved toddler. Thank goodness... I was at my wits end! Hope you get there soon!!
Also, that meme
All your bed talk made me laugh... all of you are being normal and planning to move your toddlers to regular beds at normal times. Meanwhile, I'm over here with my 3.5yo still in a crib. BUT, she told DH, "I need a bed that's down right here" (meaning, without the crib rail on the side) while I was out of town because the character in one of her books crawled into bed and she realized he didn't have to climb over the rail like she does (she'll climb into her bed, with us standing behind her, but is too afraid to climb out
We're kind of hoping she forgets about it because we have it too good with her contained in a crib. She can't get out if she's pitching a fit about bedtime and she'll wake up then fall back asleep after reading a little on weekend mornings... allowing us to sleep in some (until 9am on Saturday!) If she doesn't forget, though, we're going to have to set up something for her to earn her big girl bed.... like good bedtimes for x amount of time or something lol.