@babytimeagain Thank you! Yay!! Congratulations on everything coming in low-risk... such a relief! Do not feel guilty for being a bit disappointed. Maybe if you tell YH in a cute way it will help bring on the excitement and make it feel more real? On the bright side, you'll get a mama's boy and get to experience the best of both worlds. I grew up with an older brother and although we did fight then, we are very close still.
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@babytimeagain (((hugs))) Congratulations on all low risk! I'm sure it's natural to have a certain vision in mind, and take some adjusting sometimes. I know there is a huge part of me that would love another girl to be a sister to DD as well, but another part of me that knows if it's a boy, that may be our family's only shot at a boy on DHs side ever. (SIL has two girls and is done, BIL is divorced and never had/wanted kids, and given our struggles, there is no guarantee of a third THB for us.) So I have decided for myself, I will be happy either way, (even if I don't get a chance to re-wear all DDs amazing girl-clothes lol). Ultimately, this baby is a PERSON. A whole, complex person. Not a doll to dress up, or a stereotype, and unfortunately, even having another girl alone does not even guarantee they would grow up to have a great relationship! At the end of the day, that sibling bond will be there no matter what, GG, GB, BB etc. Love is what makes a family, and I have no doubt your kids will both know plenty of THAT. <3
@ziggymama06 Just for funzies, I wanted to share the (awesome) format of my Claritest NIPT. That also came back very fast! Not sure if a person would ever really have the opportunity to choose, but there it is.
<div class="Spoiler"><img alt="" src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/xo/o3npjtohg21g.png"> I will say I was a bit confused by one thing, I didn't notice until now. The age at egg retrieval was actually incorrectly listed as my <i>current age</i>, not my age 2-3 years ago. So anyway, not sure where they got that information, or how it would appear with a non-IVF pregnancy, but anyway.</div>
@BusinessWife That is awesome!! I still cannot believe how fast your results came in and you were able to receive them electronically! Mine essentially looks the same as far as the format, except the pictures aren't as cute. The nurse actually left my full results taped to the door (in an envelope) - not sure that's HIPAA compliant, but whatever it worked out and I'm happy to see the full report. (Hubs and I did question for a moment if the nurse would actually write the correct gender on a paper since she had given me attitude about calling again... but the results were in!!) The Panorama tested for two additional abnormalities... perhaps that's why it took longer?! Anyways, planning on touring the two midwife facilities shortly. This entire debacle of them not answering the phone/not responding has sent me over the edge.
Me: 33 DH: 36 Dating 4/2008 Married 6/2016 TTC #1 9/2019 BFP 12/13/2019! EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@riatortillaxo thank you for the support and sharing your experience. I hope this disappointment passes fast so I can be excited to be pregnant again. I still have a long way to go!
@tyrion_ that brought tears to my eyes. Thank you. ❤️
@babytimeagain Congrats on everything low risk and on your sweet boy. I know you feel disappointment and that is valid, but I promise that when you see your sweet boy, you will be so in love you will wonder why you ever felt this way. Boys have a way of getting into their mama's hearts and never leaving. My sister has 4 girls and while she is happy, she always comments on how my boys always check in with me with a sweet kiss or a hug. She says she is a little jealous of that because her girls don't do that, even her toddlers. Hugs, hun. Your feelings are yours and they are valid. Find a special way to celebrate. You will get there.
@babytimeagain I definitely understand how u feel I went through gender disappointment with my last baby which was a boy and we were told he was a girl 1st then later found out he was a boy but I promise u it goes away and that sweet baby is gonna steal your heart Congratulations on your baby boy 💙
Hi everyone just popping by to say I had genetic testing Labs drawn on 2/5 and I had results yesterday on 2/11. I'm not sure how accurate the gender prediction is, but mine said that we are having a baby boy! My husband is super happy even though I told him there's a small chance for a girl still. Now we can happily worry about names for the next 6 months lol.
Does it say anywhere which test?@older1sttime_mom2b it should be pretty accurate (they kind of just have to say that.) There is fetal dna mixed in with mom's, so if they detect both X and Y sex chromosomes, they can tell it's a boy! I believe if they report girl (xx) there is a <i>slight</i> chance there just wasn't enough fetal dna in the sample to get an accurate read, and detect the presence of a Y sex chromosome. But if they found a Y sex chromosome in your blood, there's really only one explanation! Congrats!!! 💙💙💙
@BusinessWife I read your response here, and the only thing I could think was, "The only exes that I care about are in my f***ing chromosomes." PLEASE tell me there are some Lizzo fans here somewhere.
I'm wayyy behind....congrats to everyone who has found out what they are having!!!
@babytimeagain IDK if you read my post but I had some gender disappointment as well. I didn't tell anyone but the night we found out we were having another boy I cried hardcore....then cried some more because I felt SOOO guilty about how I was feeling about a perfectly healthy boy. Hormones are a bitch. Well, fast forward a week and DH and I are truly excited now!! We have a top contender for a name and everything is feeling more 'real' now. Just like the other ladies said, your feelings are valid (and I had to just keep reminding myself of that too). I hope that your bummer feelings pass soon!!!
@gsmomplus1 thank you for the support and solidarity. I hope I can accept this soon and feel excited. I’m struggling hard core today. I can’t even go there yet with planning for this baby- finalizing a name, etc. so good for you! That’s great you’re getting excited. ❤️
@BusinessWife I had the myriad prequel test done and I am super happy to hear we are low risk! We did elect to find out the gender but for my extended family it will be a surprise. It'll be my husband's 3rd child and his only boy (and my first). It's good to know that these tests are usually pretty accurate ☺️
We just got our results back today on Valentines Day ❤️ And It’s A Girl🎀 I’m so excited my husband doesn’t know yet we are having gender reveal today for him and the kids so he will find out then
@babytimeagain@gsmomplus1 Same disappointment boat as you two. I think that’s why I wasn’t mad about having to wait another 4 days to get the test results even though my dr had them- part of me was scared of the answer. We’re having another boy (everyone, and I mean everyone, who knew was hoping for a girl). I confess I goggled if the NIPT could ever be wrong. 🙈 While I know I’ll love this little boy just as much as my first (who is already so sweet and very protective of me even at 4 😂), it’s hard to let go of those girl mom dreams. On the bright side, for the last couple years I didn’t think we’d have another kid, so I am truly grateful this baby is healthy.
But if one more person says my severe morning sickness means it’s a girl, I may smack them. 😒
@babytimeagain gender disappointment is natural when you have a reality you want. It will take time but you're right, once baby is here you will love them to bits. My brother and I were super close growing up and still are if that helps
@babytimeagain Thank you, thinking of you as well. For what it’s worth, I have a brother and we are extremely close. We have always gotten along even through childhood and now as adults, we are still close. I was nervous about having a boy when I found out about my first, but we have some of the silliest most ridiculous fun together. I know you may not feel a bond now, but it’ll come in time. No need to rush it.
@kimbo262 I am in the same boat. I didn't want to find out what we are having until the end solely because I dont want to deal with everyone else for the next 6 months. DH wants to know so we can plan so we will find out. Everyone is telling me it's a girl, referring to the baby as a girl. I am planning for another boy (have since we found out I was pregnant). Everyone said it's a girl with DS1, we ended up with a boy. I know the first questions we will get are: so are you going to try again for a girl, are you disappointed, followed by the pity that I didn't get a girl this time. I know I just want a healthy baby no matter the gender but I just dont want to deal with other people. We would still get all those questions once the baby comes but I didn't want to deal with it while I am still pregnant, if that makes sense.
@pengy16 The best response I ever heard to the "aren't you disappointed / are you going to try again for a X" question was from a mom of two boys. She simply said no and no. I wanted to raise two different children, and my boys are their own unique humans in every way.
The boy/girl divide feels so significant right now because it's the one with a clear answer, but there are so many other questions that will have an even more profound impact on how these babies turn out and our ultimate relationship with them -- introvert or extrovert? athletic and/or bookish? early riser or night owl? adventurer or homebody? dog or cat person? This is just the starting line
I wanted a girl, we are having a girl, and yet I still have gender disappointment. It seems crazy, but I think especially if you are planning for this to be your last, it makes sense to mourn the other babies you will never have. I hope I get a nephew at some point, though, so I can still have a baby boy in my life without having to be pregnant again.
Just got NIPT results- all is well and we are having a little girl! Very surprised as I was almost certain it was a boy- we had a name picked out and everything! I understand the gender disappointment- it’s a little like mourning a person who will never be, as this will be our only child due to my age. Still, super excited and relieved about the test results.
@andreaaaaaaaaaa congratulations on the healthy NIPT results and having a girl! I’m finding that picking out a boy name and buying a few cute outfits is helping me start to bond and deal positively with the gender disappointment I’m experiencing. It’s definitely hard to readjust expectations and totally normal to mourn what wasn’t meant to be. Thinking of you.
Do we have a poll somewhere? I also follow the July BMB because my due date is so early august and they have a poll which is nice to see the spread! Anyways, add me to the girl group! Long post on the weekly randoms thread about finding out early than expected.
Re: I'm here for the SEX!!!
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@ziggymama06 Just for funzies, I wanted to share the (awesome) format of my Claritest NIPT. That also came back very fast! Not sure if a person would ever really have the opportunity to choose, but there it is.
<div class="Spoiler"><img alt="" src="https://us.v-cdn.net/5020794/uploads/editor/xo/o3npjtohg21g.png">
I will say I was a bit confused by one thing, I didn't notice until now. The age at egg retrieval was actually incorrectly listed as my <i>current age</i>, not my age 2-3 years ago. So anyway, not sure where they got that information, or how it would appear with a non-IVF pregnancy, but anyway.</div>
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@babytimeagain IDK if you read my post but I had some gender disappointment as well. I didn't tell anyone but the night we found out we were having another boy I cried hardcore....then cried some more because I felt SOOO guilty about how I was feeling about a perfectly healthy boy. Hormones are a bitch. Well, fast forward a week and DH and I are truly excited now!! We have a top contender for a name and everything is feeling more 'real' now. Just like the other ladies said, your feelings are valid (and I had to just keep reminding myself of that too). I hope that your bummer feelings pass soon!!!
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@kimbo262 I’m sorry you’re going through this too. It’s so hard to let go of the dream you envisioned. I’m thinking of you.
@thefords2020 congratulations on your baby girl!
@babytimeagain gender disappointment is natural when you have a reality you want. It will take time but you're right, once baby is here you will love them to bits. My brother and I were super close growing up and still are if that helps
The boy/girl divide feels so significant right now because it's the one with a clear answer, but there are so many other questions that will have an even more profound impact on how these babies turn out and our ultimate relationship with them -- introvert or extrovert? athletic and/or bookish? early riser or night owl? adventurer or homebody? dog or cat person? This is just the starting line
Anyways, add me to the girl group! Long post on the weekly randoms thread about finding out early than expected.