Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: UO 1/16
AFM, I've never watched any of the Bachelor franchise, and I'm perfectly okay with that.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
@mrsvp614 it's SO BAD. I watched it intermittently 10-15 years ago... but I just CAN'T these days. So cringey.
*Formerly LuND*
Me: 35 | DH: 37
TTC: 7/2016
Low AMH, mild MFI
BFP 7/29/17
EDD: 4/5/18
BFP #2 7/2/19
EDD 3/13/20
AFM, I'm SO over taking my family's feelings into consideration for this baby. That sounds so harsh, but I'm nervous about this flu/RSV season and my family (and DH's family) is constantly pushing back on us not wanting people kissing the baby. Initially, we thought we wouldn't mind having immediate family kiss the baby but one of the nurses at our hospital class said she really doesn't recommend anyone but mom and dad kissing baby this season, which makes me feel better since I can say it was nurse recommended, lol. It's the first grandchild so I totally get it but our families are making it seem like I have no free will in deciding what I want for my child. Thank you for coming to my TED talk, lol.
DD1 EDD 9/29/2015, Born 9/24/2015
DS1 EDD 1/3/2018, Born 12/26/2017
BFP #3 3/21/2019, EDD 11/29/2019, MMC/D&C 5/7/2019
BFP #4 6/28/2019, EDD 3/12/2020
@mrsvp614 I’ve never seen any bachelor franchise shows either! It’s just not my thing
@lemonlove86 good for you! It’s your baby not theirs. Do you think they’ll listen if you are clear with your intentions and say that’s what the doctor recommends? If not make sure they understand the rules or make it clear that if they break them they won’t get to see the baby! I told my mom not to kiss DS on the face last time and she told me that she wouldn’t comply and made a big show of kissing him on his face. We had other issues going on too but that was a big straw that led to us not even talking for over a year. Now I still don’t have a good relationship with her and my relationship with my dad has suffered too.
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
@lemonlove86 Stand your ground! They will have baby’s whole life to kiss him or her. The least they can do is be safety-conscious in that first month or two when flu is still a concern. They can show love to baby in SO many other ways.
@varimama I’m shocked your mom would act that way! That’s horrible.
There's a ton of TV out there--esp. trash reality TV--that I've never watched. I watched one season of Bachelorette, never Jersey Shore (& I'm from NJ), no RH... I can get into competition reality TV more than Real Life reality TV. We don't have cable? So that contributes a lot to what I watch/don't watch. Well, right now we have access to my roommate's cable, but I digress. Normally, it's antennae TV & streaming services for me!
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
**TW**
IF DX January 2016- Me: Right sided hydrosalpinx
Right tube removed: February 2016
Acupuncture + TCM: March 2016
BFP: July 4, 2016 | DS: March 2017 (39w 2d)
TTC #2: April 2019
BFP #2: April 2019 | CP: April 30, 2019 (4w 2d)
BFP #3: July 15, 2019
EDD: March 23, 2020
@lemonlove86 @mrsvp614 I'll let yall know if I like season 2 any better!
DS2 10/2017
DS3 due 03/2020
The only “food” I want mint in is a mojito🍹
@lemonlove86 omg I can totally relate with you on this right now. I am so so stressed about all things cold/flu season. As well as just having to deal with visitors in general when I’m dealing with a newborn. My mom never gets the flu shot, and so I told her not only does she need to get the flu shot but also needs to get the TDAP vaccine. And I don’t think she’s taking me seriously when I say she can’t come visit if she doesn’t. At one point, when I was mentioning we might be regulating on hospital visitors, she told me I “can’t not let her visit.” Let’s get one thing straight real quick: My baby, my rules.
So this may be a little crazy and over the top, but I’ve decided to send out an e-mail to my mom, mother in law, sis in law, and aunt with a list of “visitor rules” for both hospital and home. And you know what, the in-laws are going to talk major ish on me for it and my mom will probably get pissed at all my rules but I need to think about my sanity and my baby and blasting one quick e-mail is way easier than having to repeat myself over and over again once baby is here and I’m already dealing with enough stress. I may be shooting myself in the foot bc I know it “takes a village” but I don’t want that villages help if they can’t follow the rules.