PGAL check in week of 12/8

gomillis · December 2019

This is a thread for anyone who has experienced a loss at any point during this journey. Hoping we can support each other. TW applies to the entire thread.

EDD/weeks+days?

Other children?

Previous losses?

Concerns or worries this week?

Any milestones coming up?

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down?

tyrion_ · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days? 5+1

Other children? 2 little ones (4 and 2)

Previous losses? Early loss in May

Concerns or worries this week? I am now officially past my loss milestone but am not quite as relieved as I was hoping to be. My lack of symptoms is really messing with me.

Any milestones coming up? None coming up but last Thursday was my loss milestone.

Edit:

@gomillis, I hope you don’t mind I added a GTKY

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down?

I’m meditating for a few minutes a day and praying every night. I also am still testing with cheapies every morning. I need a testing intervention.

gomillis · December 2019

@tyrion_ Great idea to add a GTKY! I’ll add it to the original post.

EDD/weeks+days? 6+1

Other children? 1 DS, almost 3 years old

Previous losses? A blighted ovum discovered at 10 weeks in Nov. ‘18 and an MC at 6 weeks this September.

Concerns or worries this week? This week I’m finally allowing myself to get excited about this pregnancy, but that makes me even more worried about getting my hear broken again.

Any milestones coming up? Tomorrow will be the milestone where I lost my pregnancy in September. On Thursday I’m getting my first US. I never got to the point of having a routine US with the past two pregnancies. I’m excited, but also terrified that we will discover another MC then.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down? Trying as much as possible to stay busy and focus on parenting and work.

winnie1122 · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days?
Estimated EDD Aug 13

Other children?
Two kids, ages 3 and 1

Previous losses?
4 previous losses (2013, two in 2014, and last one in 2015) They feel far away now but the first trimester anxiety is still strong since I lost them all before 10 weeks. No cause was ever determined so that doesn't help my anxiety!

Concerns or worries this week?
This sounds silly, but I'm worried that my boobs aren't sore! It's always my first noticeable symptom and since I have a history of low progesterone it's making me worried that my progesterone levels aren't high enough.

Any milestones coming up?
Thankfully my blood draw is tomorrow so I'll know all my betas by Tuesday.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down?
Trying not to think about it too much. I've been down this road enough to know that worrying makes no difference in the outcome so for now I'm just happy to be pregnant! Plus having two toddlers is pretty distracting!

tyrion_ · December 2019

@winnie1122 My boobs aren’t sore either and that is what freaks me out the most! I am telling myself that they’ve been through plenty at this point that nothing bothers them anymore 😂

winnie1122 · December 2019

@tyrion_ Haha I was telling myself the same thing!! I hope that's true!!

mina_honey · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days?
8/4 / 5 weeks 5 days

Other children?
1 DS - 18 months

Previous losses?
TFMR at 20 weeks due to T18

Concerns or worries this week?
Not enough symptoms! The nausea comes and goes, boobs aren't sore enough, etc

Any milestones coming up?
I'm looking forward to getting the NIPT which will relieve some anxiety but it's still a ways away. Dating ultrasound in a couple of weeks which, with my first pregnancy, gave the first red flag so I will be relieved if the baby is measuring on track.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down?
Remind myself that I'm doing everything I can and there are some things I cannot control.

jenjen8503 · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days?
8/7/ 5 weeks 4 days

Other children?
None

Previous losses?
MMC at 10 weeks in 2018

Concerns or worries this week?
My hcg blood tests have been a little on the low side compared to others.

Any milestones coming up?
My first ultrasound is Thursday at 5w 6d. I’m not expecting to see much but it will be a huge relief to know my embryo is implanted in the right place.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down. I found this mantra that I really like: this is a different pregnancy, a different baby and a different story with a different ending.

tyrion_ · December 2019

@jenjen8503 that mantra is really beautiful. I needed that today 💗

jenjen8503 · December 2019

@tyrion_ I say it twice a day.

babytimeagain · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days? Aug 18/4 weeks today!

Other children? DD- turning TWO this weekend!

Previous losses? MMC in July at 8.5 weeks (baby stopped growing at 6 weeks)

Concerns or worries this week? I just got the first result back from beta HCG testing- my level
was 71 at 3w+6. Now anxiously awaiting my next blood draw tomorrow and the results from that to make sure my numbers are riding appropriately. Due to my previous loss, they’re micromanaging me a bit and will give me an early ultrasound. Thank goodness.

Any milestones coming up? Nope!

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down? Repeating to myself to think positive and that no matter what happens tomorrow, this baby deserves to be loved and celebrated. I don’t want to look back with regrets. I already feel more attached than last pregnancy, so that’s good. I’m reminding myself that it’s still going to hurt like hell if something happens- there’s no way to truly guard my heart. I want to be thankful and grateful every day I’m pregnant. DH and I created life, and that’s pretty amazing.

wildrainbow · December 2019

Hey, y'all I'm jumping in.

EDD/weeks+days?
Aug 16/ 4+2

Other children?
2 kiddos 3 and 13mo, both boys

Previous losses?
I've had 5 previous losses. Both kids are rainbows, I lost 3 before my oldest was born and 2 before my second. One was ectopic, one was a BO, and th others were CPs.

Concerns or worries this week?
Had my first appt today. Due my history, I have an early u/s to confirm uterine pregnancy. Today's showed a lovely sac nestled snuggly in my ute. This was a surprise pregnancy. H and I weren't trying and actively preventing. So it was a HUGE shock.

Any milestones coming up?
Last week was a milestone, none until April.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down? I'm breathing. Unfortunately, these r
Early weeks are riddled with anxious thoughts, so I take a moment to practice deep breathing. I also repeat the mantra Today I am pregnant, and I love my baby.

cornichonmam · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days? 5w

Other children? DS 14 months

Previous losses? MC at 7w in 2017 before conceiving my son.

Concerns or worries this week? I'm trying not to worry but I know I won't start to relax about it until I see my little one on an ultrasound at 8w. I have PCOS so I have higher rick of MC but I'm trying to focus on the changes I have made to my life since my first loss. I've lost over 50lb, I eat better, exercise regularly and recently ran a 10k obstacle/ endurance race (simmilar to Tough Mudder). My body is in a good place to have a baby and with PCOS that is really the only thing you can do is try and be as healthy as you can.

Any milestones coming up? The mile stone of my first loss will be on Christmas Eve so hopefully that will distract me.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down? With my last pregnancy right from the very fist week I started keeping a box of mementos of the pregnancy. I fond having something physical to look at in these difficult few weeks was helpful so I think I'll be doing that again.

beenabee · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days? 8/14 - 4+4

Other children? 3 and 1.5

Previous losses? I had a BO right before my first son and then a miscarriage, at 10 weeks, 6 months prior to conceiving my second son.

Concerns or worries this week? My due date for my miscarriage was August 23rd so I just keep thinking what happened with that one is going to happen this time. We went in for our ultrasound and saw a baby and heartbeat but small sac, went in a week later and no more heartbeat.

Any milestones coming up? No. I have my first appointment December 23rd so I’m holding my breath until then.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down? Analyzing all my symptoms like a crazy person and peeing on sticks every couple days to make sure the line is getting darker. I don’t think my line can get darker than the last test I took a couple days ago so that one’s out now. I also keep telling myself that whatever happens is meant to happen and if I end up miscarrying this one, worrying about it right now is just putting myself through it twice.

tara4910 · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days?
August 18/4+1

Other children?
3.5 daughter

Previous losses?
3 chemical pregnancies (1 in 2014, 2 in 2019) all before 5 weeks

Concerns or worries this week?
Taking progesterone suppositories. I was taking one at bedtime since 3dpo but yesterday had the tiniest bit of pink/brown spotting and started taking them twice a day (AM and PM). No spotting since so hoping it does the trick. Had a beta HCG and progesterone level drawn yesterday too, hopefully will hear back today.

Any milestones coming up?
Getting to 5 weeks will give me some relief. Getting to U/S #1 and seeing a heartbeat will feel great too.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down?
Taking more tests which is just giving me more anxiety. I need to remember that the tests really can’t get any darker at this point and they are designed to tell me I AM pregnant, not HOW pregnant I am. Thanks for giving me some mantras to use!

wildrainbow · December 2019

@tara4910 Are you doing oral or vaginal progesterone? I am on vaginal progesterone and I always spot with it. Hugs, I know it's scary to see

psychobutthead · December 2019

EDD/weeks+days?
Well according to my calculations I'm 4 weeks. The doctors office said Im 5 weeks. But I don't have 28 days cycles mine are 31 days. Have been for 6 years so I should be due August 17th. But I'm going to wait for a doctor confirmation.

Other children?
Yep 2 others. A boy and a girl.

Previous losses?
2 previous losses

Concerns or worries this week?
Honestly I'm terrified. I dont feel like their is a safe point or a milestone I will feel ok. I was almost in 2nd trimester witg the last pregnancy before I learned it was a missed miscarriage that really ended at 9 weeks and I just didnt know.
I had ultrasounds and heard its heart beat.i still have the recording. I dont think I want to listen if theres a heartbeat this time.

Any milestones coming up?

Just waiting for my first ob appointment on January 10th. Made the appointment this morning and the nurse it suppossed to call me tomorrow on what I can and can't do.

GTKY: What are you doing to try to keep your anxiety down?

Stay distracted. My kids keep me busy so that should be easy. I'm going to try to hide this as long as possible from my kids.

tara4910 · December 2019

@wildrainbow thanks. I am taking them vaginally, and I didn’t even consider that the suppositories could be the reason for the spotting. It’s gone for now so I feel a little better about things.

@psychobutthead I’m so sorry you don’t feel like there is any milestone that will make you feel less anxious. I definitely feel that way sometimes. It’s so hard.

psychobutthead · December 2019

It is. Last pregnancy I didnt at any point think anything was wrong. But with my pregnancy with my son before that I was on edge nonstop.
I know other ladies here probably are too.

I'm hoping some days will be better than others.

winnie1122 · December 2019

Got my beta hcg and progesterone results back this week and feeling much better. My progesterone was on the low side like it always is but on the higher end of low so I'm not too worried. Started progesterone supplements and baby aspirin last night. Hcg more than doubled so I am hopeful that we're on a good track. My OB scared me to death last night though because she left me a message after hours saying she saw my first beta and was looking forward to seeing my 48hr number (which I had gotten drawn that morning so I thought maybe she was calling about that result). In her message she said a number that didn't sound right and when I tried to call back I got the office closed message and I spent the entire night convinced it was bad news. I was shocked when the nurse called this morning with great numbers. PGAL brain is a beast

tyrion_ · December 2019

@winnie1122 I am so sorry for such a stressful night over miscommunication. I’m happy it went the other way for you, though 💗

gomillis · December 2019

Had my first ultrasound today at 6+5 and saw the heartbeat! I am so relieved and excited. We are getting another scan at 9 weeks just to check the progress, given my history.

BUT, talking to the midwife was very odd. She said she’d had a lot of miscarriages and kept naming things I might be concerned about at this point in a very unhelpful way. She also started crying. My heart went out to her because it must be so hard to be a midwife in her situation. However it was not a very reassuring experience.

babytimeagain · December 2019

Update: I got my results back from my beta HCG tests and all is good! Levels are rising appropriately. First ultrasound scheduled for Jan. 2, when I’ll be a little over seven weeks pregnant. Stick baby, stick!

babytimeagain · December 2019

@gomillis hooray for the reassuring ultrasound! Amazing news. That’s unfortunate your midwife unloaded all that on you- not necessary or professional. Probably put you in a really weird spot.

maureenbioni · December 2019

I had a loss before my son. And now I’m nervous because my one friend I told at work told everyone. So I’m just sooo nervous now that somethings going to happen.

gomillis · December 2019

@babytimeagain So happy to hear about your levels rising! Wishing you a great ultrasound.

[Deleted User] · December 2019

I am struggling today. Went into the city for a show last night, and now I can't shake the thought that I may have overdone it and now I don't "feel" pregnant today. 😔 Second beta results cannot come soon enough.

mc2727 · December 2019

I feel ya. I take a pregnancy test every other day just to make sure I still am. It sets my mind at ease. I know it’s weird. Don’t worry you’ll be fine

tyrion_ · December 2019

@BusinessWife praying for good betas and that this next round of numbers brings you peace. I am also having one of those days where I’m sure something’s not right. While I am thrilled to be pregnant this anxiety is for the birds.

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