Labor and Delivery Questions Thread

keeksie84 · December 2019

A few of us have already started talking, so I thought I would make an official thread for all things labor and delivery! Please post questions, concerns, past experiences - really anything!

chichiphin · December 2019

EEEEP! okay I have one.

so I am going to be in a major hospital setting for my L&D but will be attempting to have limited interventions & pain management when possible (recognizing I can't control everything). One thing that is important to me is that I get to be in comfortable clothes. I have seen these laboring gowns on amazon and other places that are soft cotton, look like dresses, but have all of the necessary snaps in the right places for monitors etc. Should I ask my OB if it is okay to show up with one of these and wear? Who's call is it that I get to wear this? Should I call the L&D unit at my hospital?

kailanae · December 2019

@chichiphin I would think you could ask your OB if it is allowed and see if they know - I would suspect if they've delivered at the hospital before that this has likely come up. While the OB might not set the rules, they should likely know whether or not it is allowed.

Though FWIW I thought the hospital provided gowns were comfortable enough as well, if they tell you no. I brought clothes to change into after labor but the gowns were easy to nurse in so I ended up wearing them more than my own clothes during my stay. Plus things are pretty messy those first few days so it was nice not having to worry about bringing home extra laundry.

chichiphin · December 2019

true @kailanae she has delivered a lot of babies at this hospital so she may know. I'll be honest I wasn't planning on bringing it home haha

keeksie84 · December 2019

I'm with @kailanae on this one! I think your OB should know the rules; I'd ask her. I packed so much stuff and made my poor husband drag it all over the hospital. I ended up wearing the hospital gown they provided. It was super soft and comfortable and they brought me a fresh one whenever I needed it. I wore it until I changed into leggings and a sweatshirt to go home.

miss.sally · December 2019

@chichiphin I’m pretty sure they can’t force you to wear the hospital provided gown. BUT. I will add to what @kailanae said. The hospital ones aren’t so bad, and it’s definitely nice to just toss it after because it gets so gross. I brought clothes to change into for right after I was done and cleaned up. That was definitely nice. But while I labored I didn’t even notice what I was wearing. There is a lot of other stuff going on. Lol.

As far as the less intervention goes... that’s solely based on your OB and not the hospital itself. At least in my experience. As long as s/he is in tune with your wishes, that’s what really matters.

stassischroeder · December 2019

@chichiphin I actually say ask the L&D team. The OBs are on that floor for a minimal amount of time (just to catch babies and do quick rounds), but those L&D nurses LIVE there. You can also ask for a tour of the L&D floor and ask all of your questions at that time

treetop19 · December 2019

@chichiphin, agree with asking the L&D nurses... I wouldn't think they would have a problem with you wanting to wear your own gown, especially if it wasn't a high risk situation. once labor gets started, you probably aren't going to notice or care what you're wearing, as @miss.sally said. I know I didn't, and that's mainly because labor gets so intense it's really the only thing you focus on at the time. The funny thing is I'm normally a modest person, but once labor started, all of that went out the window and I could have been wandering around the room stark naked and not have noticed.

one thing to consider, if your hospital has a tub, shower, or birthing pool, you may spend a lot of time in that (I spent a lot of time in the tub.) If that is the case, then you won't need to worry about a gown for most of labor. I have heard of people wanting to bring bikini tops or something similar for the tub/shower, though, because they feel better being covered up when sitting there. I ended up just wearing my regular bra.

stassischroeder · December 2019

FWIW, I totally did the L&D tour, asked them about limited intervention and every imaginable type of med-free-friendly tools (birthing balls, etc). Then I proceeded to BEG for an epidural about 30 minutes after arriving when I was in labor

I didn't, however, do ANY med-free labor prep so I wasn't really set up for success LOL.

Not that this will be anyone else's experience, just a funny anecdote.

vrstrawn · December 2019

@stassischroeder I feel like this will be me

I am prepping for a med-free labor and I really feel like I can do it...but then I also can see myself just asking for an epidural stat. We will see what happens!

kantobean · December 2019

@stassischroeder ha, same! I wasn’t set on going med-free, but I wanted to try. Shortly after arriving I asked if it was too late for the epi (I was already 8cm!) and was SO GLAD I could get one. Although it still hurt like hell to push so I’m not sure it was 100% effective.

treetop19 · December 2019

@kantobean, I had a similar experience with my epidural birth - pushing still hurt with the epidural. I'm not sure why that is, but maybe it's because they turn it down just enough so you can feel the sensation of pushing? actually that was the only thing that matched in experience with my med-free birth - pushing pain was pretty equal with both of them, but with med-free, I felt more pain/pressure in my back than with the epi.

@stassischroeder, that sounds like me at my first birth.. I really wanted to go intervention-free, but it didn't quite work out. I asked 'all the questions' too! I'm sure the staff were thinking.. yeah right lady, you will be begging for the epidural like everyone else.

@vrstrawn , being prepared is definitely your best friend going unmedicated. I did a lot of research/reading beforehand, but I think what helped me the most when it came right down to it was my DH - he applied counter-pressure during contractions and was encouraging me while the nurses/midwife really were not much help, and were MIA most of the labor. I think either having a supportive birth partner or a doula would be pretty much a necessity if you're in an environment where the nurses are less than helpful.

EmilyLove25 · December 2019

@stassischroeder @kantobean This was me too with DS. With DD I was induced and needed an epidural after 20+ hours. With DS, I was SCREAMING for one from the first "real" contraction until I got it. Hahaha. He was posterior, so I think that made it even HARDER for me, and as others have said, I didn't have a plan for pain management, so I went into "OMFG OUCH" mode asap.

Malidocious · December 2019

Oh I love this thread!

I like the idea of going natural (epi-free) but I don't think I'm strong enough for that. I don't handle pain the greatest and I'm very into the idea of an epidural. I did the tour of the L&D like @stassischroeder suggested and it was pretty informative. They basically said I could bring anything I wanted (including a birthing ball, whatever clothes I wanted, etc.) so that was nice. I hadn't thought of bringing a bikini top @treetop19 but that's a really good idea. I'm definitely not opposed to just wearing my regular bra, though!

@EmilyLove25 I feel like I'm going to go into the OMFG OUCH mode immediately

stassischroeder · December 2019

@vrstrawn @EmilyLove25 @kantobean I did ok laboring on my own for the first 6ish hours (including 1.5 hrs in the car - ZERO STARS. DO NOT RECOMMEND), but once I got to triage I started throwing up from the pain. To be fair, I had gnarly back labor and probably some issues from my previous pelvic/sacral/pubic bone fracture. Oh, and cervical scar tissue that my OB warned me would probably make early labor more intense.

I guess that's a good PSA:

If you have had any procedures on your cervix in the past (like a LEEP or cone biopsy), be sure to ask your OB or midwife if you have any cervical scar tissue. I'm SO GLAD I asked my OB. She was so nonchalant and like "eh, I'm sure you don't have any scar tiss --- OH WOW, yeah you DO have some pretty serious scar tissue!" when she examined me. It's not the end of the world, but can cause early labor to be REALLY intense and may cause you to not dilate. I've had friends who were given arguably unnecessary c-sections because they weren't dilating due to cervical scar tissue, but, usually scar tissue can be manually broken up during a cervix check. Although, breaking up the scar tissue isn't something they usually do without an epidural.

So, luckily my OB was aware of my scar tissue and told me that I would probably go into labor and not dilate, so the nurses would probably try to send me home. THANK GOD she instructed me to have the nursing team call her so that she could explain the situation. Right after the nurses talked to my OB they admitted me and gave me my epidural.

silverhope · December 2019

@kantobean oh wow! I couldn’t feel a dang thing with the epidural. They had to tell me to push bc I had no feeling that it was time ha. I know you are spsd to feel it a little to know to push, but I didn’t want to feel anything, so I kept hitting the epidural button any time I could feel a twinge of pain ha.

@chichiphin during delivery I wore a sports bra to try to feel modest and I wanted to rip it off my body. It was just a hindrance. I was totally fine with the provided gown for the birth and wish I had been fully naked underneath. However, I wore a robe I brought for the two days I was in the hospital post-birth and I loved it. When my in laws came to visit baby, I felt slightly more covered up and put together in my store bought robe instead of a hospital gown. I actually kept the robe since I didn’t use it during labor/birth, so it was pretty clean (yay hospital diapers for mom) and just needed to be laundered when I got home. I’ll def bring it for this time around too.

kailanae · December 2019

To add some more anecdotes of my two prior birth experiences - I had decided with both kids to go as far as I could on my own and be open to doing the epidural if it felt right. For both, I labored at home until I started getting nauseated. My contractions were always 10+ mins apart so I was not able to use the the timing to determine when to go to the hospital, so for me pressure and nausea are apparently my signs that I'm getting close. DH had to force me to go to the hospital with DS1 because I was convinced I wasn't progressing due to my contraction spacing. Both times when I went into the hospital for triage, they saw how far apart my contractions were, tried to comfort me that it might not be time yet, then checked dilation and saw I was around 7cm.

For both kids, the waves of nausea that came with late stage contractions were my reasoning for getting the epidural moreso than the pain. With DS1, I was dehydrated due to not drinking while in labor (tip - definitely keep hydrated while in labor) so I had to get a bag of IV fluids in me before they would let me get the epidural. With DS2, I was 7-8cm when I got to the hospital so they were able to put me in a room and basically get my epidural right away. They ended up setting my epidural to be a bit too strong with DS2 and I passed out soon after it was in place for a few moments until the anesthesiologist rushed back in and lowered the dosage.

For DS1, I pushed for over 2 hours but felt no pain during the process. For DS2, he came out on the first push, also with no pain because of the epidural. Hopefully DS3 doesn't just fall out of me before I get to the hospital

My "plan" for DS3 is to basically do the same thing as my first two births if no major complications - labor at home until it feels right, then go in and likely get an epidural. I'm thankful I live 5 minutes from the hospital!

varimama · December 2019

I planned on playing it by ear with the epidural too. I was induced with a ripening agent and then my water broke and real contractions started. DS was sunny side up so I had bad back labor. I made it about 8 hrs with the jacuzzi and ball but then found out I was only half a cm dilated and they were going to start Pitocin. My current contractions were all I could handle and I’ve heard Pitocin is worse so I told them I wanted an epidural first. My epidural was great! I couldn’t feel any pain but did feel pressure during pushing so I knew when to push. I was able to walk fine after they got me stitched up. Though they monitored me for a bit, like when I went to the bathroom the first time.

miss.sally · December 2019

I really wanted a med free birth with DD but ended up getting induced at 38weeks because of pre-e. I made it about 16 hours without the epi but decided to get one because the pitocin was really strong. I think my body just was NOT ready and it caused issues. With DS I went in very open minded, but I got induced again. That time everything happened REALLY fast and intense so I got an epi pretty quickly. From the time we arrived at the hospital to the time he was born was only 5 hours. Which is pretty unheard of for an induction. Buuuuut I was already 3cm dilated for two weeks before that and I’d had prodromal labor for almost 6 weeks. So my body just needed a little kick in the a**.

I’d love to go into labor naturally this time if possible. And I’d also love to labor naturally as long as possible, but I had such good experiences with recovery post-epidural that I’m not super scared to get one again if need-be. And I’m a total wimp when it comes to pain sooo I won’t be surprised.

keeksie84 · December 2019

I was also team "play it by ear." I went in with an open mind...i actually kind of freaked out when I had to fill out the birth plan worksheet. I had no idea what to expect pain wise so I didn't feel like I could make an informed plan about how I wanted things to go. My water broke around 6 am and by 8 when we arrived, I was already about 5cm dilated. At around noon, the midwife said I either needed an epidural or I needed to get ready to push. I was in quite a bit of pain, but managing ok. I got scared to start pushing so soon so I opted for the epidural. I really lucked out with mine because I could still move both legs, but it really took the edge off the pain. I could also feel contractions, so I knew when to push. I'm totally team epi now and will probably end up getting another. I'm a little scared of running out of time for one this time because my first labor went relatively quickly for a FTM.

momoftoddlers · December 2019

@miss.sally Your DS birth story was exactly mine for DD1. The quick labor was a dream but the prodromal labor was so frustrating/anxiety inducing.

It was almost unfair to have such a quick first birth because it set me up to feel like I was failing with DD2. For her my water broke in a trickle at 38 weeks, they didn’t even believe it was broken until the lab test. I was GBS positive so they insisted on admitting me. Then they started pitocin, which made me need the epidural, but they wouldn’t finish breaking my water. I labored for 33 hours stuck in the bed. I didn’t advocate properly for myself.

So, that’s why this time around I would like to labor at home longer, and delay the epidural longer, and that’s why I switched to the midwives because I know they will advocate for me.

treetop19 · December 2019

@varimama, @miss.sally, pitocin contractions are definitely worse.. I think an epidural is almost necessary to get through them. I was induced with my first, and the pitocin contractions felt almost like intense muscle spasms.. I felt like my body was just out of control and I was panicking. The epidural was pretty much the only thing that allowed me to settle down and relax enough to dilate. so for anyone looking to do unmedicated.. I wouldn't recommend it if you're induced/on pitocin... though I know some ladies have done it. I found that natural contractions felt different - they were intense, yes, but they didn't feel like out-of-control spasms to me, and they were just more predictable/came on more gradually.

@momoftoddlers, that sucks that you had to labor so long in bed.

I really don't like when hospitals get so pushy. it's hard to advocate for yourself when you're in such a vulnerable state already. I don't blame you for wanting to stay away as long as possible. I had this problem with my second.. I had wanted to birth sitting or standing (where I felt most comfortable) and I really think it would have been less painful for me under the circumstances (I had back labor with a posterior baby, unmedicated), but they forced me into bed on my back to push, in spite of me yelling at them that laying on my back was almost unbearable. it is annoying that they didn't listen or even try to help me out. I don't really know what I'm going to do about it this time around, apparently 'lying on the back' is protocol for them, despite the fact that they claim 'you can push in whatever position you want to' during the hospital tour. I wish I could join one of those tours and stand in the back, saying 'they're lying, they'll force you onto your back no matter what.' lol.

mrsc918 · December 2019

SIGN ME UP FOR THE EPIDURAL STAT! I ain’t about that bravery business - me and pain don’t get along! So I commend all of you for even trying to stick it out hahaha

Also...it seems we have a lot of vaginal delivery STM+ in here. Any c-section mamas?? Would love to hear some of those experiences too! My mom and all the women in her family had c-sections, so I won’t be surprised if I end up having a c-section.

varimama · December 2019

@mrsc918 I was worried about that too last time bc my whole family and DH’s had c-sections. However I think for our mom’s generation doctors may have pushed c-sections harder for some reason, similar to how they pushed formula over breastfeeding. Most doctors want to try vaginal first now and I was able to have a vaginal birth.

miss.sally · December 2019

@momoftoddlers that’s why I’m wanting to switch to midwives also!!! It’s making me feel good that other mamas are in the same situation. I think hospitals are so “set in their ways” that they often forget that all women are different and so are all labors! Ugh.

miss.sally · December 2019

@mrsc918 I second what @varimama said. C-sections used to be pushed WAY more than they are now. So many were/are unnecessary and it’s definitely important to talk to your OB about their beliefs on that. My first pregnancy, my OB tried to push me into one because I had been in labor so long but I was adamant about not wanting one unless the baby or I were in danger, so I resisted and it was fine. You just really have to stand up for what you want. If you start researching cesarean rates in hospitals you’ll come to find a ton of really scary and insane stats about it all. It’s crazy.

mrsc918 · December 2019

@miss.sally @varimama yeah definitely, they don’t want you to have a c-section unless it’s necessary at Kaiser so it’s def different than back in the day. I’ve known a lot of women who actually preferred c-sections and requested it, but they wouldn’t let them.

But no point in talking to my OB about it bc she won’t be the one delivering. Kaiser changed it a few years ago to where there are outpatient OB’s that see you for appointments and then there are inpatient OB’s that deliver, so you pretty much just get who you get based on who’s working and available that day.

I am hoping as long as baby isn’t breach, I’m able to have vaginal. But I don’t have “child bearing” hips so if she doesn’t turn before it’s too late, I’ll probably be out of luck. And I’m not going to do the aversion thing - again, me and pain don’t get along.

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