I don't hate Trump supporters necessarily. But
I do have a hard time identifying with them or even respecting them, especially
people who continue to support him after the last few years. I think part of my
issue is that the people in my life who I respect the most (those actively
involved in giving back to their communities, who advocate for
those less fortunate, etc) do not support Trump, and my racist, hate-filled
family members LOVE Trump (like go to the rallies and post pro-Trump craziness all
the time).
Also idgaf how long peoples’ shorts are. People wear stuff I wouldn’t wear but I don’t care. As a high school teacher I used to ask kids, especially girls, to cover up. Crop tops are super popular right now. I just don’t care anymore. It’s a fashion and self-expression thing and our culture is weirdly prude and ashamed of bodies. I also think girls who are thicker tend to get called out for short shorts/low cut shirts more than skinny girls and it really bothers me. Not saying anyone here is doing that, it’s just a bothersome trend I’ve noticed.
Ya know, I've been struggling with how much wardrobe policing is reasonable, and how much is anti-feminist and damages women's freedom.
I'll admit that the first thought that ran through my mind when I initially saw the really short shorts trend was that I'd have a really hard time letting my (possible future) daughter wear them. I guess that feeling comes from me not wanting any of my kids to be overtly sexualized at a young age. But at the same time, I agree that our culture is weirdly prude and makes sex and nudity into a taboo subject.
@stassischroeder girls are over-sexualized starting SO young. It’s actually terrifying having a girl who is growing up in our society. They’re expected to act/look older than they are and half the time it’s other girls making them feel that way. We all know men don’t mature until well into their 30s (only kind of kidding).
I very much police what my daughter wears. As much as I’d love for her to be able to express herself, I 100% do NOT want any boy/man looking at her in any sexual way. And unfortunately it’s actually difficult to find clothes. She’s almost 10, and there are clothing stores that carry crop tops and booty shorts for six year olds. She sees other kids wearing them and feels left out. I hope someday she will thank me. Probably not. But a girl can hope.
@varimama i wasn’t offended! My mom made me feel like garbage already ha but it’s only bc the truth hurts. You are sweet—no worries
and @dunder_mifflin aw thanks. I think the truth hurts and I do see the dirty burlap sack now so I love 2 photos without the “dirty sack” but I hate the others now ha. Oh well. DS is much cuter now than as a newborn anyway!
@silverhope if it makes you feel any better, burlap was super popular for weddings at one point and is still popular for country weddings! So that burlap sac is super trendy. It’s just such a mom thing to say. My mom was horrified at the thought of mismatched bridesmaids dresses 😂
@stassischroeder I hear you. My daughter is 3 so we really don’t have that issue yet but I know it will be something I think about. Right now she just only wants to wear dresses, which is kind of annoying in itself. I was not a girly girl and I don’t feel like I’m raising her to be one, but she definitely has a preference for dresses, wants to paint her nails and do “make up”, and loves anything sparkly. 🙄
Ooh! This week's UO is juicy and I love it. On wardrobe policing, I feel pretty torn. The feminist in me is 100% behind @kantobean on this one. Women and girls have been told by so many people in so many ways that they are not good enough or too fat or too ugly or too whatever. I so strongly believe in body positivity and self expression. I think girls and women should wear what makes them feel comfortable or sexy or beautiful or whatever they are going for. I also think that curvy girls are unfairly judged when it comes to dress code, especially in middle and high school. Buuuuuut, as a mom of (what will be) 2 girls, I have different feelings about what MY girls wear. The thought of them being sexualized by boys and men when they're young horrifies me.
On Trump supporters, I'm in the no excuses anymore category. His presidency has surfaced some of the ugliest parts of our country and I get with people who stand behind this.
@jenEP THANK YOU - it's a sex reveal, not a gender reveal and I get irrationally angry every time people mess this up. I get that "gender" sounds better than "sex" and the baby's gender will LIKELY match their private parts, but it doesn't always and it's inaccurate.
@jenEP I'm with you on gender reveals, and this was my UO a few weeks ago here. Totally on board.
The topic of dressing/sexualizing kids also reminds me that I hate so many baby/toddler clothes with stupid phrases on them, like "Little Stud Muffin." Ew.
@MrsVP614 yes baby clothes with dumb sayings are a pet peeve! I got a few as gifts (nothing too bad, usually just “happy” or something) but I will never buy baby clothes with words on them.
@kantobean My DD Is 3 (almost 4) and I discourage dresses because SHE CAN'T PLAY IN THEM! Of course if we go to a wedding or some event and she picks one out, I'm all in, but they are SO not convenient for preschool, biking, sports, or playgrounds haha.
@stassisschoreder, @miss.sally, on the short shorts thing.. I don't really care what other people wear in public, but when it comes to my 13 year old daughter.. she doesn't like wearing shorts, so I'm safe there - but if she did wear short shorts (with cheeks hanging out), I wouldn't allow it. I don't allow her to wear her leggings without a shirt long enough to cover her butt, and I nix low cut tops. While she is getting older and I do value self-expression.. I don't want men looking at my 13 year old like a sex object. I may loosen up the rules a bit as she gets older, just because it's her body, her choice, but.. for now I think she's too young to be making that choice on her own.
@EmilyLove25 my DD loved dresses and we had tons of play dresses. She just always wore bike shorts under them (she’s 9 and still does). They make these things and for the life of me I cannot remember the name, but they’re underwear that are shorts to wear under dresses! DD lived in them from 2-5. Best invention.
@silverhope My sister did a newborn photo shoot with the staged photos of my nephew decked out in a burlap sack (basically) and we all ADORE the pictures still. He's almost 3 now. Sure, we joke now that some of the poses are a little bizarre/uncomfortable looking and some of the outfits are ridiculous, but it was fun. It was the first baby in the family after 20 years, and we still have some of those pictures framed of him sleeping during the shoot. No regrets! :-P
I'm torn on the wardrobe debate. I think half of the time, girls (teenagers and young adults) are trying to go out of their way to look sexual all the time and that really rubs me the wrong way. It is like they don't understand that you can be attractive and beautiful without having to wear sexy or skimpy clothes constantly. On the other hand, I value self-expression and I think everyone should be allowed to look and dress the way they prefer. The younger the girls are, the less I care about self-expression and the more I care about covering them up simply because men are disgusting (not all men, I understand) and the idea of sexualizing a minor makes my blood boil.
I don't get many opportunities to get to my laptop at work lately, so all my posts are going to have a lag, and be long, but I love all of these!! @varimama I like the lifestyle newborn shoots, but the posed shoots would be unnatural for me as most of the props and bows and such are just not my personality. But I think they are still cute for those that are into them!! DD was also in NICU for one week and then we didn't do a photoshoot with her, so while I have a ton of pictures of her sleeping, any that have me with her are of me in no makeup and most often pajamas. We also found a photographer that is really reasonably priced for a lifestyle shoot with DS, but not sure if I would spring for it at some photography pricing I've seen!! @MrsVP614 and @stassischroeder Sooooo glad you guys said this about cussing, because I just cannot curb it, it's ingrained in me haha. I think in fact parenthood has increased it some to be honest, not like at the kids of course, but a ton of muttering under my breath at the never-ending messes in my life and times I can't get a carseat to cooperate or whatever. @miss.sally This one is tough for me, because I don't know all the policy and practice facts, but going to echo some of the other ladies that it's not entirely about the politics in this case, but Trump's mere existence is just...obscene, to me. So while I wouldn't unfriend anyone for supporting him as it inevitably happens here in Oklahoma, mostly among my high school friends and as long as they're not pushing it on me, I do knock them down quite a few pegs in my mental assumption of their IQ, and morals. @stassischroeder I have worn some short shorts back in my 'prime' (lol) but cheeks showing just seems unsanitary and impractical to me!! @kantobean I get that some people can be prude, and I say rock that thong at the pool...where there is chlorine. Maybe it's working in a restaurant, I'm over analyzing, but did they sit or hover when they used the bathroom and then sat the same cheeks onto my stool or booth? Makes me want to wear pants everywhere, and I'm not a germaphobe by any means, I don't even hover, but maybe those germs should stay in the bathroom!!
It's interesting to hear everyone's responses about the way girls dress!
Since I am seeing these girls at my job (school nurse at a public HS) I find it inappropriate because they are in a learning environment. I'm all for girls feeling sexy and comfortable, plus size girls included (i'm one myself) but I don't think Algebra is the place for that. I have actually found myself saying "honey that dress is great for a party, but wayyy too low/tight/short/etc for school."
I will say that while I don't love the short shorts with a tube top belly shirt look anywhere, it is much more tolerable out at a mall then it is when they walk into my office @ 8am on Monday morning.
@laurenm2123 I agree with every single word you wrote! I worked for an insurance company that had to put out a memo one year to remind girls that this is an office that follows business casual attire, not a club and not their bedroom.
@laurenm2123 that makes total sense to me. Similar to how you wouldn’t show up to a job (well hopefully) in a tube top and shorts that show your cheeks you also shouldn’t show up to school in them. If I have a daughter perhaps I’ll use that example with her and if she wants to dress differently otherwise idk we’ll have to see. I’m all for self expression and I don’t want to make her follow the rules like my mom had (shorts down to your fingertips, tank top straps 4 fingers wide, etc...) but I also hate how disgusting some people are and don’t really want to go to jail for stabbing some guy who sexualizes my teenage daughter 🤣
Me: 33 | DH: 34 Married: October, 19, 2015 EDD 2/22/17 DS1 born on 3/2/17 EDD 3/8/20 DS2 born on 3/10/20 EDD 11/24/23 (Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)
@laurenm2123, I failed to consider/mention your point in my post and I think it's stuck a great one! There is totally a time and a place for tube tops and short shorts, but my food lab is not one of them.
Re: UO Thursday
I don't hate Trump supporters necessarily. But I do have a hard time identifying with them or even respecting them, especially people who continue to support him after the last few years. I think part of my issue is that the people in my life who I respect the most (those actively involved in giving back to their communities, who advocate for those less fortunate, etc) do not support Trump, and my racist, hate-filled family members LOVE Trump (like go to the rallies and post pro-Trump craziness all the time).
I'll admit that the first thought that ran through my mind when I initially saw the really short shorts trend was that I'd have a really hard time letting my (possible future) daughter wear them. I guess that feeling comes from me not wanting any of my kids to be overtly sexualized at a young age. But at the same time, I agree that our culture is weirdly prude and makes sex and nudity into a taboo subject.
*Formerly LuND*
Me: 35 | DH: 37
TTC: 7/2016
Low AMH, mild MFI
BFP 7/29/17
EDD: 4/5/18
BFP #2 7/2/19
EDD 3/13/20
I very much police what my daughter wears. As much as I’d love for her to be able to express herself, I 100% do NOT want any boy/man looking at her in any sexual way. And unfortunately it’s actually difficult to find clothes. She’s almost 10, and there are clothing stores that carry crop tops and booty shorts for six year olds. She sees other kids wearing them and feels left out. I hope someday she will thank me. Probably not. But a girl can hope.
and @dunder_mifflin aw thanks. I think the truth hurts and I do see the dirty burlap sack now so I love 2 photos without the “dirty sack” but I hate the others now ha. Oh well. DS is much cuter now than as a newborn anyway!
Married: 8/22/15
BFP #1: 8/22/17 | DS: 4/20/18
BFP #2: 7/14/19 | EDD: 3/18/20
On Trump supporters, I'm in the no excuses anymore category. His presidency has surfaced some of the ugliest parts of our country and I get with people who stand behind this.
@jenEP THANK YOU - it's a sex reveal, not a gender reveal and I get irrationally angry every time people mess this up. I get that "gender" sounds better than "sex" and the baby's gender will LIKELY match their private parts, but it doesn't always and it's inaccurate.
The topic of dressing/sexualizing kids also reminds me that I hate so many baby/toddler clothes with stupid phrases on them, like "Little Stud Muffin." Ew.
Married: 10.15.16
DS BD: 8.20.17
TTC #2 1.1.19
BFP #2 7.3.19
EDD #2 3.13.20
DD1 EDD 9/29/2015, Born 9/24/2015
DS1 EDD 1/3/2018, Born 12/26/2017
BFP #3 3/21/2019, EDD 11/29/2019, MMC/D&C 5/7/2019
BFP #4 6/28/2019, EDD 3/12/2020
@varimama I like the lifestyle newborn shoots, but the posed shoots would be unnatural for me as most of the props and bows and such are just not my personality. But I think they are still cute for those that are into them!! DD was also in NICU for one week and then we didn't do a photoshoot with her, so while I have a ton of pictures of her sleeping, any that have me with her are of me in no makeup and most often pajamas. We also found a photographer that is really reasonably priced for a lifestyle shoot with DS, but not sure if I would spring for it at some photography pricing I've seen!!
@MrsVP614 and @stassischroeder Sooooo glad you guys said this about cussing, because I just cannot curb it, it's ingrained in me haha. I think in fact parenthood has increased it some to be honest, not like at the kids of course, but a ton of muttering under my breath at the never-ending messes in my life and times I can't get a carseat to cooperate or whatever.
@miss.sally This one is tough for me, because I don't know all the policy and practice facts, but going to echo some of the other ladies that it's not entirely about the politics in this case, but Trump's mere existence is just...obscene, to me. So while I wouldn't unfriend anyone for supporting him as it inevitably happens here in Oklahoma, mostly among my high school friends and as long as they're not pushing it on me, I do knock them down quite a few pegs in my mental assumption of their IQ, and morals.
@stassischroeder I have worn some short shorts back in my 'prime' (lol) but cheeks showing just seems unsanitary and impractical to me!! @kantobean I get that some people can be prude, and I say rock that thong at the pool...where there is chlorine. Maybe it's working in a restaurant, I'm over analyzing, but did they sit or hover when they used the bathroom and then sat the same cheeks onto my stool or booth? Makes me want to wear pants everywhere, and I'm not a germaphobe by any means, I don't even hover, but maybe those germs should stay in the bathroom!!
Since I am seeing these girls at my job (school nurse at a public HS) I find it inappropriate because they are in a learning environment. I'm all for girls feeling sexy and comfortable, plus size girls included (i'm one myself) but I don't think Algebra is the place for that. I have actually found myself saying "honey that dress is great for a party, but wayyy too low/tight/short/etc for school."
I will say that while I don't love the short shorts with a tube top belly shirt look anywhere, it is much more tolerable out at a mall then it is when they walk into my office @ 8am on Monday morning.
Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
Married: October, 19, 2015
EDD 2/22/17
EDD 3/8/20
EDD 11/24/23
(Formerly Marriedhamstermom Feb ‘17)