December 2019 Moms

PGAL Discussion June

1. How many weeks are you? 

2. Previous loss(es)? 

3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? 

4. Any appointment updates? 

5. Rants/Raves/Questions? 

6. Any milestones coming up? 

7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now? TV is how I relax and take my mind off things! 

Re: PGAL Discussion June

  • 1. How many weeks are you? 13w2d

    2. Previous loss(es)? MMC at 9 weeks in 2016 and a CP January 2019

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? I am feeling more positive after our good NT scan- still a little nervous about the NIPT results but trying to have a good head space about things. 

    4. Any appointment updates? I see the OB in 2 weeks for my monthly check up. 

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions? In the ultrasound appointment it said I have a posterior placenta this time which made me happy because my last pregnancy with my daughter I had an anterior placenta and it gave me so much anxiety that I didn't feel movement until like 22 weeks. 

    6. Any milestones coming up? After hopefully Low risk NIPT results- a good anatomy scan!

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now? TV is how I relax and take my mind off things! The Handmaid's Tale Season 3 and Big Little Lies Season 2 start this week. Need something to replace Game of Thrones which I've felt such a void from since it ended. 
  • 1. How many weeks are you? 14W4D

    2. Previous loss(es)? 1 blighted ovum 9/18.

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? I’m feeling pretty good- I was tested about a month ago with an ultrasound because I’m older and higher risk, and my next appointment isn’t for two more weeks!  Kind of nerve wracking.  I’m really tired- I have epilepsy and today my exhaustion got the better of me and I had a day of seizures.  Not fun 😝

    4. Any appointment updates?  My next appointment is just a check up on June 19th.  So far, no weird indicators yet, no bleeding, just exhaustion and some sickness still.  

     5. Rants/Raves/Questions? I really want to feel confident that everything is fine, I think I’ve got a few weeks left before I’ll feel that way.  Still wary that something could go wrong.  I really want to keep my health going, too, practicing yoga to stay strong and flexible.  

    6. Any milestones coming up? I’m in second trimester!  No movement feelings yet...

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now?  I love to watch Frasier and The Office!  I always need a good laugh!
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  • 1. How many weeks are you? 11.5

    2. Previous loss(es)? 14 weeks, molar pregnancy at 8 weeks, and several CP’s 

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically?   I feel a lot better this week after hearing the HB on Tuesday.  With my loss at 14 weeks, the baby had died at 9, so we in a way have made it farther. I am still not accepting the fact we might actually have a baby.  I keep feeling a sense of dread of how much more it will suck when we lose it farther and farther along.
      I have been mildly nauseous since the beginning, but now I am getting sick a lot more, so I guess MS is here to stay.  

    4. Any appointment updates?  I had my blood drawn for NIPT and should get the results around Tuesday.

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions?   I am going to my cousin’s house tomorrow to get baby stuff from them.  It makes everything feel more real and makes me feel like I am jinxing myself.  But I eventually need to accept that I am pregnant....

    6. Any milestones coming up?  In a way we surpassed one this week, but otherwise not for a few more weeks.

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now? TV is how I relax and take my mind off things!   We started Good omen this week, we aren’t very far in because DH is sick and keeps falling asleep.  I really want to watch Chernobyl.  (I canceled HBO once GOT ended, and I think I only have a few days left, so I need to binge watch it this weekend before I have to pay for another month!)
  • @spartanrd4, that’s great about your placenta.  I feel like I will feel a lot better with the pregnancy once I can feel movement.  
    @cpk3535 I am sorry you had a rough day, I hope you get some much needed rest!  
  • 1. How many weeks are you? 14

    2. Previous loss(es)? Tubal pregnancy 2015

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? Still pretty anxious. Physically everything seems ok except the spotting. I think I over did it today bc it has increased quite a bit tonight 

    4. Any appointment updates? I was seen last Friday for the spotting and have a regular appt tomorrow

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions? My round ligament pain literally feels like my muscles are ripping away from my pubic bone today, and I love it bc that lets me know baby is growing!

    6. Any milestones coming up? I finally hit second tri today!

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now? TV is how I relax and take my mind off things! Dance moms just started back and 90 Day Fiancé. Obviously I love some trashy reality tv haha
  • 1. How many weeks are you?  10 weeks

    2. Previous loss(es)?  MMC March 2018, I was about 12 weeks (baby stopped growing around 6-7).

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? Emotionally I feel pretty drained. I'm riding another anxiety wave right now, because my nausea has died down and my symptoms are pretty minimal. I felt comforted knowing that my wanting to puke every 27 seconds meant my body was doing it's thing and growing a baby.

    4. Any appointment updates? Next appt is on the 20th! I cannot wait to see this little peanut and hopefully get reassurance that all is well.

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions? 

    6. Any milestones coming up? 

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now? TV is how I relax and take my mind off things! Just watched the first 3 episodes of the newest season of Handmaid's Tale. Currently looking for other binge-worthy shows. I run a small shop out of the house and I rely on Netflix/Hulu to keep me occupied while filling orders.
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Married to DH for 6 years (together for 16)
    DS born 12.13.14
    DD born 10.15.16
    BFP 1.24.18, MC 3.13.18
    <3 BFP 4.25.19, EDD 12.31.19  <3


  • @holly321 I know how you feel about jinxing things....I bought some maternity clothes yesterday and still keeping the tags on for a bit "just in case". You definitely need to check out Chernobyl, it was so good! 
  • 1. How many weeks are you? 13w5d

    2. Previous loss(es)? 5 weeks 2016, 7 weeks (at 10 weeks)2018, and 5 weeks 2018

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? Pretty good. only nauseous in the morning if I don't eat breakfast right away. Still need a nap in the afternoon or I drag all evening. 

    4. Any appointment updates? Last appointment was 5/28. U/S was great. Switching practices though, so next appointment will be sometime in late June probably.

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions? 

    6. Any milestones coming up? Sunday starts the second Trimester for me and I can stop taking progesterone. 

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now?  Not much since Game of Thrones ended. 
    Me: 32 DH: 31 Married since 2010
    MC January 2016
    BFP February 2016 Baby Girl born 11/2016
    BFP 8/16/2018 EDD 4/29/2019 MMC 10/3/2018
    BFP 12/16/2018 EDD 08/26/2019 MC/CP 12/20/2018
    BFP 03/28/2019 EDD 12/07/2019 Hoping for our rainbow


  • @holly321 I totally hear you and needing to accept that I'm pregnant but also still thinking how much it will suck if/when I lose this pregnancy.  PGAL is cruel.  I finally had to take the tags off some new maternity clothes because I need to wear them!

    @spartanrd4 I'm hoping I have a posterior placenta this time too.  I've had two posterior, and two anterior, and being able to feel that movement is so reassuring!

    I hope you both get good NIPT results quickly.

    @cpk3535 I hope you're feeling better!  That sounds really rough. 

    @Megz1902 You must be looking forward to stopping the progesterone!  I hated that stuff, so gross!

    1. How many weeks are you? 13w2d

    2. Previous loss(es)? 1 MMC, 2 CPs, and a 16 week T-18 loss in January

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? Emotionally, I'm back and forth, but maybe finally believing that I'm going to bring home a baby this time.  The kids know, so that was a huge step for us.  Having a Doppler at home has given me some reassurance.  Physically, I'm feeling a bit better and can stay awake past 7:30 now!

    4. Any appointment updates? Nothing until June 25

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions? It's finally warm here!  We actually got out sunblock and t-shirts yesterday!

    6. Any milestones coming up? The baby being born healthy?  I think getting past the anatomy scan will be a big one.

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now? I binged Lucifer recently.  Now I'm watching season 2 of Good Girls, and trying to like The Umbrella Academy. 

  • @bakerstreetboys how often do you use your Doppler? A friend said I could borrow hers now that her baby is moving but I’ve heard mixed reviews on the safety/frequency of use. I think it would help my anxiety tremendously.
  • @k_mama91 I have the Sonoline B, and I use it a couple of times a week, which was approved by my OB.  It takes me less than two minutes to find the heartbeat, and as soon as I hear it, I'm finished.  I find it so reassuring to be able to check in on him because I'm not feeling any movement yet.
  • @k_mama91 I use my doppler every other day/every day sometimes. Its quick, I know where to find the heartbeat now, so it takes a couple of seconds to find. Once I hear it for a good section I am finished with it. It definitely keeps my piece of mind.


    1. How many weeks are you?  12 w 6 d

    2. Previous loss(es)? June 18 CP, August 18' CP, Nov. 18 BO 9 weeks

    3. How are you feeling? Emotionally and physically? I have been fine, but today I am having a lot of anxiety. My friend who was pregnant due the same month as my with my BO had her baby last night. I am elated for her, but it just makes me so sad. I am pretty much an emotional wreck these days with this pregnancy though. 

    4. Any appointment updates?  Next appt is June 18. I had a partial previa last pregnancy that moved up with growth, so I am just hoping not to have to deal with that stress this time around.

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions?  I love having a doppler. It keeps me in check ad we all love to listen to the baby! 

    6. Any milestones coming up? Hit 2nd tri this week and felt a weight off my chest. 

    7. GTKY: What TV show(s) are you watching right now? TV is how I relax and take my mind off things!  Dead to Me, Bold Type, finishing up shadow hunters. 
  • @klmcguire Ooh, Dead to me was so good!  I hope they make a season 2!  I’m sorry you’re having a rough time. My due date for my most recent loss is this month and I’m dreading it. I’ll be exactly one day less pregnant than I was when we lost him. It’s going to be hard. 
  • @bakerstreetboys They renewed for another season this week!! 
    I will be thinking of you as this time approaches. Its rough, but we will get through it and have babies to hold close on the other side. 

  • @bakerstreetboys @klmcguire any tips on Doppler? My friend gave me her Sonoline and I can’t find the HB when I’ve tried. 
  • @anniemarie887 Have you watched youtube videos? I have no real advice, H is a nurse practitioner he was finding the HB at like 9 weeks lol. I do know its still really low where what I would consider at 13 weeks. Also, I find it easier when I use a lot of gel.

  • I am jealous you all can find the HB so early- I have a tipped uterus so can't hear it until later, my OB didn't even try with my last baby until 14 weeks. 
  • @klmcguire I’ll have to give that a try. @Spartanrd4 I also have a tipped uterus, definitely took the MA at my last appt a few minutes. She was funny, “baby don’t make me chase you all over this uterus!” I guess that might be part of my issue 🤷🏻‍♀️
  • @anniemarie887 Go lower than you expect to :)  Basically just over your pubic bone, and try angling it down.  I have always been able to find it by about 9 1/2 weeks, but I don't have a tilted uterus, so that probably makes a difference.  Don't move it around too much, and go slowly.  Definitely check out a youtube video!
  • @anniemarie887 yeah I tried to find it the day before my NT scan (12w5d) and didn't find anything. Next day baby HR beating away at 161. Stupid Ute!! 😒
  • Thank you all for the input. I had an appointment today and asked about using one, I got the all clear. My next appointment is 3 weeks away and it’s the longest I’ve gone between scans so the Doppler will be much appreciated.
  • Spartanrd4Spartanrd4 member
    edited June 2019
    Ugh going down the rabbit hole- DH convinced me to try my doppler yesterday (I was 13w5d) and still can't find the HB. I looked back in my chart from my pregnancy with DD and my OB was able to find the HB on his doppler at 14w2d at my doctor's visit. I never used a home doppler this early in pregnancy- I bought it with my daughter later in the 2nd tri. I know that the doppler the OB uses is much more high tech and higher quality so I shouldn't compare both situations but its just so hard. I was feeling great after last weeks NT scan and now PGAL brain has gotten ahold of me again. I am going to be so nervous before my next OB appointment on Monday- I am still waiting on my NIPT results also :( Please ladies, talk me off a ledge! 
  • @Spartanrd4 I know how you feel. I've been keeping most of my anxiety at bay by the fact that my DH and in-laws have just assuming everything is normal so I have been riding their energy for a bit. I've also been chanting "happy and healthy" everytime my thoughts start to spiral. Helps me a bit. Sending good thoughts your way!!
  • @Spartanrd4 I know what you're going through, too!  I haven't been inspected by the doctor's office since early May, and everything looked pretty good at 10 weeks.  Now I'm over 15 weeks, still not showing much, and I have to admit I'm a bit freaked out.  My next appointment isn't for about 10 more days...why so far apart, docs?? 

    I agree with what @jandawg suggested- meditation and trying to settle myself with yoga or some exercise really seems to help.  Even just taking a few minutes to sit and meditate by just placing your hands on your belly, or one hand on the belly and the other on the heart, is pretty calming.  It's tough though, I haven't been sleeping great either, which has been leading to some weird, unsettling dreams.  Hopefully we all can feel a little more settled soon! 

    I've also heard the doppler doesn't work perfectly for everybody (tilted uterus for example), hence I haven't tried to pick one up for myself.  It actually takes me back to the self-induced panic I was in a couple of months prior to getting pregnant this time, where I was trying to test my ovulation with two separate tests every freaking day for two months, and somehow still didn't get pregnant.  When I decided that it was just making me more stressed out than it was worth, I stopped testing, and bam, we got pregnant the next month.  I think psychological issues can have huge effects on a person physically (I absolutely know this from my epilepsy), so trying to keep yourself as mentally and emotionally balanced as possible in this delicate time is key.  Sorry, long-winded!  Sending good thoughts to all of you ladies!!   <3
  • Spartanrd4Spartanrd4 member
    edited June 2019
    @cpk3535 I do have a tilted uterus so I know that is a factor....that is why I'm kicking myself for even trying to listen to the HB myself this early. DH is so positive and always thinks everything will be okay and I'm Miss doom and gloom. I did go to therapy after my last loss, maybe I should go back if I keep having these issues with anxiety because I know it's not healthy! I just need to chill out, thank you for the support, thanks to you also @jandawg
  • @Spartanrd4 I've been finding the depression group on here really helpful and supportive.  I would say I suffer more from anxiety than depression, but it's been really nice to talk to some members of that little community.  
  • cpk3535cpk3535 member
    edited June 2019
    I just posted this in the depression group, but thought this group would have a good take on it as well...

    When does this (pregnancy) start getting really, truly happy?  I feel like I’m still holding on to a few things- a fear that not everything is going great (not helped by the fact that my last doctor’s appointment and my upcoming appointment will be more than 6 weeks apart) and some weird issue I’ve had all of my life with happily accepting gifts of any sort.  What is that?  This even applies at Christmas and birthdays- I frequently don’t convey genuine joy for gifts, leading some people to think I don’t like what they gave me or whatever.  I think it’s a fear of coming off too proud, bragging, spoiled, I’m not sure.  Now I feel like I’m kind of in that position with very early developing baby, not really openly joyful.  I want to be, and I know I’ll love this kid so much when she’s here, but at the moment, I’m still not really feeling like a happy mommy to this baby growing inside of me.  

    I also have this thing with when the baby truly becomes a little person.  While I know that her body is developing and doing amazing things, I subscribe to this yoga philosophy that a baby’s soul doesn’t enter their body until 120 days (about 19 weeks) after conception.  This helped me tremendously when I had my MC last fall, because we were long off of from that.  Now I’m getting close to that number (15W3D) and I’m waiting to feel a little soul in there before I start having a more motherly feeling, maybe for fear that I still have a chance to loose her.  

    Did this make sense to anybody else? Sorry for rambling on.  Lots of love, I hope you’re all doing well.
  • @cpk3535 That definitely makes sense. I do not feel as attached to this baby yet as I did my daughter at this stage. I'm not making any big plans, for fear this baby won't happen and the planning will have been wasted. I think it is a very common feeling for PGAL moms.  


    Me: 32 DH: 31 Married since 2010
    MC January 2016
    BFP February 2016 Baby Girl born 11/2016
    BFP 8/16/2018 EDD 4/29/2019 MMC 10/3/2018
    BFP 12/16/2018 EDD 08/26/2019 MC/CP 12/20/2018
    BFP 03/28/2019 EDD 12/07/2019 Hoping for our rainbow


  • lilyrheaslilyrheas member
    edited June 2019
    Sorry didn't know all the acronyms used across posting boards
  • Hi @hnbrady sorry you’re struggling with things - this discussion is geared as a check in for women who have experienced a pregnancy loss. You’ll probably get a better response and connection if you look for your due date group :wink:
  • KTZ17KTZ17 member
    edited June 2019
    Sorry, wrote a post and then realized I didn’t follow the right structure.

    1. How many weeks are you?  14 weeks 2 days

    2. Previous loss: I had a complete molar pregnancy in August 2017.  I had some bleeding at 7 weeks and went in for an ultrasound and there was nothing there.  They did a d&c two days later and when we received the pathology we found out it was a complete molar.  Then I started bleeding heavily and passing large clots (like really big) and ended up in the ER.  They couldn’t control the bleeding so I had a uterine artery embolization.  They told me it was that or a hysterectomy.  Two weeks later the same thing happened again and I was readmitted to the hospital and had another embolization.  That finally controlled the bleeding, but then I had 5 months of methotrexate treatment (a form of chemo) because my pregnancy had become gestational trophoblastic disease.  Once treatment was over we had to wait a year to try again and due to the embolizations we didn’t know if my body could sustain a pregnancy.  But now here I am and all is well so far.  Thanks for reading my novel if you got this far.

    3. How are you feeling?  I am super anxious and worried and obsess a lot, so I am glad this group exists.

    4. Next appt is June 28 for early gestational diabetes testing since I had it with my daughter.

    5. Rants/Raves/Questions: none at the moment 

    6. Milestones: just reached second trimester 

    7. GTKY: my husband and I are watching Breaking Bad for the first time and I’ve also been watching New Girl on my own.  I also watch terrible reality shows like Teen Mom 🙊

    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
    imageimage
  • @KTZ17 - I'm so sorry for what you've been through and I'm so glad that all has been well for you so far this time around.  I totally relate to the anxiousness and worry and I wish you happiness and health! I've shared this previously and it may not be your jam, but I pretty much repeat "happy and healthy" whenever those obsessive thoughts take over and it's really helped me. 
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