My UO is I don’t cut out anything but alcohol when pregnant. Tw* I’ve been pregnant 8 times and nothing I’ve cut out or added in has changed the outcome to any of them end tw*. I don’t go overboard and I always eat from trusted sources but I like my ham sandwiches and my coffee and I’m not stopping.
@kbrown2385 - Same. My OB told me I needed to heat my deli meat and I accidentally rolled my eyes a little. He asked why, and I said that last time I was pregnant, there was a listeria outbreak in cantaloupe, and the most recent ones have been in lettuce, but I'm not going to stop eating my fruit and veggies, nor am I going to stop eat my cold deli meat. He shrugged.
@marebear15 exactly! In the last 5 years of getting pregnant I have not heard of one listeria outbreak in lunchmeat. I like mine cold and that’s how I’m going to eat it.
I also eat sushi to some degree as well. I eat it from reputable places and I find it delicious. Sorrynotsorry.
My hubby was shocked when I ordered sushi the other night but I trust the chef completely. I just stared at him and I was like do you think that Japanese women stop eating sushi for their pregnancies? On top of that the roll I ordered was cooked fish.
Oooh, sushi sounds so good right now! I never get the raw stuff anyways, but if I did, I probably wouldn't stop eating it. I also don't stop taking hot baths.
@marebear15 omg my husband is like "maybe you should tone down the hot showers" I'm like... I'm giving up wine, I'm giving up sushi, you can't take my dang scalding hot showers away from me too. Humph
Hot showers are making me SO nauseous. These early weeks are when I wonder to myself..was having another realllly that great of an idea? My three children are wild right now with the newness of summer break.
@crf4 i'm feeling that even though I have no kids yet LOL. We believed all the stories of "o it'll take months after getting of BC to get preggers." Nope. Apparently, we are super fertile. And all these symptoms have me reeling a bit because I've never gone through this before. I did some reading beforehand, but I feel like no amount of reading can prepare you for how crappy you feel.
Hot showers is a thing!? I didn't know that was a thing but I'm not stopping.
I've had raw fish already this pregnancy. It was from a really nice restaurant that we trust a lot. No regrets! I have cut back my coffee but I was having very excessive amounts before. I never like deli meat so that one's easy! I'm just trying to keep life as normal as possible.
I think quality sushi and deli meats are safer to eat than buffet food or food trucks in terms of likelihood of getting an infection!
I also think the society norm should be that women talk about/ announce their pregnancies in the first trimester. Sometimes we need support for morning sickness or heaven forbid, the emotional and physical trauma of a miscarriage. It’s weird that the norm is to hide our pregnancies until we are confident they will work out.. and be ashamed if a pregnancy doesn’t result in a birth.
@somewhereinnyc from personal experience, I don’t share my pregnancies until the 2nd trimester due to lack of support. People don’t know what to do or say when someone has a miscarriage. They say stupid, offensive things and end up being not helpful. I’ve never been ashamed of my losses as I know there’s nothing that could have changed it, but I don’t want to listen to “it’s gods will” or “it wasn’t meant to be”. To me that’s not comforting or helpful.
@somewhereinnyc - I agree with @kbrown2385 . In my experience, it was very painful to tell people I had lost my baby, even my supportive family. I did end up "announcing" my miscarriage on social media, but it was several months later after healing had started. I can't imagine having all the "how are you feeling" questions and having to relive telling people over and over again.
@somewhereinnyc I'd like to see earlier announcing become more socially acceptable for those that wish to, but not expected for those that don't wish to. I have told many people already about this pregnancy and some have said things like, "oh, so early!" or otherwise implied that I broke a rule in some way. But I also feel like women who never want to make a formal announcement or discuss it much beyond their immediate family need that respected as well.
@Xstatic3333 the hot showers isn't a thing because your body isn't submerged directly in the water. Hot baths are though. I was reading that anything above 100 degrees is too hot for the embryo and can cause brain and spinal damage. My husband just thinks I'm crazy for taking as hot as possible showers. I'm sorry, I don't have this internal furnace like some people do to keep me warm. (that some people is my husband who will always complain that he's too hot)
My UO is that I don’t look forward to announcing my pregnancy. I actually dread it and find it awkward. This is my fourth pregnancy, so you think I’d be used to it by now, but nope- still dreading telling people. Can I just wait until I have the baby and be all “Guess what everyone?”, lol?
@Xstatic3333@marebear15@kbrown2385 Ah I see where you are coming from and of course each person should share what they are comfortable with. If more people were exposed to the news of miscarriages, there would perhaps be more sensitive and understanding responses- and perhaps women would have more support in turn. After mine a few months ago, a lot of people I didn’t originally tell were curious why I was away from work etc. when I said I had a miscarriage, no one knew how to react- probably because they don’t hear about it often.
An older relative told me that she had lost a baby in her second trimester and said she was “mortified.” That description stuck with me.. as well as the feeling (based on how awkward some of my male friends were) that many people weren’t comfortable with me sharing the fact that I was going through a miscarriage when asked certain questions.
My UO is that I think it's ridiculous when pet owners refer to themselves as their pets' mom or dad and I don't like when the vet refers to me as my cats' mom. I'm their owner, I didn't birth them. Same goes for those pet owners who refer to their dog or cat as their actual children's sibling. Don't get me wrong, I adore my cats and they are spoiled and loved on, and I agree that pets are part of the family, but in no way do I equate them to human children. I hope I don't get flamed too hard here. My best friend got really upset with me when I rolled my eyes at her insisting her dog is basically her daughter. Um, no, she's not your daughter. Maybe have a daughter first and then tell me you see your dog the same way. And while we're at it, I'm also in total disagreement of the whole "I like animals more than people" thing that so many people say. But for the record, I AM an animal lover, I just don't think they're better than my own species. 🤷♀️
My UO is that I don’t look forward to announcing my pregnancy. I actually dread it and find it awkward. This is my fourth pregnancy, so you think I’d be used to it by now, but nope- still dreading telling people. Can I just wait until I have the baby and be all “Guess what everyone?”, lol?
Oh my gosh, yes!! I dread even telling my family. I don't care for it to spread by word of mouth because well, my 3 girls will tell everyone and their brothers, but there won't be a big social media announcement this time. I didn't even want to do it with my 3rd. HAHA
@peppyj9 so much this! Even before I has a child of my own this made me crazy! I lived with my aunt for a while in my 20s (she was only 10 years older than me so like roommates) & she had a cat who she would refer to as my sister! Firstly, I have a sister, who is an actual human being so thats just insulting to her. & secondly, surely by your theory, she would be my cousin. Either way, WRONG!!
@leprechaunlady glad someone agrees! That is hilarious about your aunt! Well, actually, annoying. It boggles my mind how many people think this about their pets! And as a side, I don't think disliking cats is as unpopular as you might think. And it's not really a surprise. I adore my cats, but as a rule, cats are a**holes.
I've done a horrible job avoiding things we arent supposed to eat. Hotdogs, queso cheese, lunch meat. Most of the time I don't even realize I "shouldn't" be eating it until I'm already eating it and then it's obviously too late to stop.
My UO is that I'm not a fan of sushi. I'll eat the veggie and cooked chicken kind but I dislike cooked fish let alone raw fish. Fish is nasty.
Edited to add- @leprechaunlady I have 2 cats. I also dislike them 😆. I'm just kidding. But they are 100% a**holes like @peppyj9 said. I hated cats until I owned one.
@dumbledoredies omg, me too! I keep forgetting there's all kinds of food stuff I'm supposed to avoid. I eat 2 eggs over easy on wheat toast pretty much every morning and it didn't even occur to me until last week that I'm not supposed to! So now I've been making them scrambled, but it's not the same. I miss my runny yolks! Thankfully seeing some stuff from STMs about what they do anyway despite the "rules" makes me feel better that I'm not seriously damaging my unborn baby. I'm really trying to do everything right but there's so much to remember! Also, disagree about sushi. I LOVE sushi! And apparently I can't eat that either for the next 9 months 😩 Edit: had more to add
@peppyj9@leprechaunlady - I agree! I really dislike the ones that use dogs or cats in their baby announcement like "My dad and mom are getting me a sibling" or "My parents are having a human baby." Just no. I've also known several couples to have to get rid of their "fur baby" after having a real one because of incompatibility or too much responsibility. An animal does not = baby.
I’ll say it, I’m team #furbaby, #dogmom, and all that jazz. It’s not hurting anybody. I love my fluffy boy. He’s not above my actual human child, of course, but I see no harm in these terms if people want to use them.
I do hate cats though. This is not an unpopular opinion in my field (environmental science) since they cause a huge amount of ecological damage.
@peppyj9 - i'm missing sushi too!! omg. A mom friend of mine said after her births she had sushi as her first meal. I was like... Imma steal that idea and have my hubby go out and get me 3 spicy scallop rolls to devour right after giving birth.
@Xstatic3333 ha, you do you. And honestly, I don't so much mind the TERM "furbaby" or "dogmom". It's more the extreme. People saying they're "mom" not "DOGmom" or referring to animals as their son or daughter or sibling. It seems to me that these people DO put their pets on equal levels as human children, and that's what disturbs me the most. But in the end, to each their own!
I'm also not a fan of the furbaby term either, but I'm definitely not as passionately opposed it like I used to. It's just not worth my time or energy to be so against it. I do see why people adopt the idea (like my friend who is unable to have children). I do see similarities of having pets and raising kids. They take a lot of work, make a lot messes, it's stressful when they aren't healthy or not getting along with others, etc. You need a break from them occasionally. You're concerned for their safety and phsycial and emotional well being. However with a child there is just so much more responsibilities and things to worry about such about finding the right preschool, keeping them clothed, help with school projects & homework, getting them involved in extracurricular activities, bullying, worrying about them making friends & reaching appropriate milestones in a timely manner, peer pressure, teaching them to drive, encouraging them contributing members of society, teaching them to be independent on so many different levels, etc. Also if you need to make a quick trip to the store you, you can leave an animal at home; you can't do that with children even if you wanted to. However,I am grateful that I don't have to take my child for walks everyday (including in the rain & snow) like some people with dogs. I also will not always have to worry about my child's poop for the rest of the time he lives with me like people who have animals.
Also pet adoption is not the same as adopting a child. Adopting a child is intense! You have to have home studies, criminal background checks, and psych evaluations done among many other time consuming things. It can be crazy expensive! It can be so emotionally draining as you waiting to find a match.
I will say that my BIL & SIL have furbabies. When they come with their animals, I am very careful about teaching my son to be respectful of them. I don't just let him pull on tails or chase after them. I teach him to pet them softly and not to shout or scream at them (even if it's out of excitement, he loves them). I check in with my SIL and ask if we need to give these animals a break from DS. I realize that these animals are very important to them and want to treat them as such. However, I do not be refer to their dog and cat as DS's cousins. I share the same opinion as @leprechaunlady .
Now, I don't have a pet right now, so I could change my tune about the whole furbaby mentality. I don't plan on having a dog until we are done having kids mainly for the reason what @marebear15 said. I don't want to have to give my dog away because I feel like it's all too much. The other reason is that the previous owner's of our house had a black lab. We found dog hair around our house for 6 months after we moved in. It got all over DS as he wasn't walking yet. We thoroughly cleaned (including having the carpets cleaned) before moving in and we still found all of this hair!
I’ve still been enjoying sushi, but just veggie rolls and California rolls. Same with soft cheeses. I’ve been craving Gorgonzola and bleu cheese and have still been enjoying it. As long as it says “pasteurized” I feel like it’s not too risky.
@peppyj9 there were some guidelines published here a few years ago which said we’re good to eat runny yolk eggs aslong as theyre from irish or british farms which im thankful for as I dont like a hard yolk.
Re: UO (Unpopular Opinion) Thursday 5/30
I’m too tired to figure out my UO right now 😂
I also eat sushi to some degree as well. I eat it from reputable places and I find it delicious. Sorrynotsorry.
I also don't stop taking hot baths.
PG #2: EDD 8/15/23 Miscarried 9w1d 1/11/23
PG #3: EDD 12/15/23
PG #2: EDD 8/15/23 Miscarried 9w1d 1/11/23
PG #3: EDD 12/15/23
PG #2: EDD 8/15/23 Miscarried 9w1d 1/11/23
PG #3: EDD 12/15/23
I've had raw fish already this pregnancy. It was from a really nice restaurant that we trust a lot. No regrets! I have cut back my coffee but I was having very excessive amounts before. I never like deli meat so that one's easy! I'm just trying to keep life as normal as possible.
I also think the society norm should be that women talk about/ announce their pregnancies in the first trimester. Sometimes we need support for morning sickness or heaven forbid, the emotional and physical trauma of a miscarriage. It’s weird that the norm is to hide our pregnancies until we are confident they will work out.. and be ashamed if a pregnancy doesn’t result in a birth.
PG #2: EDD 8/15/23 Miscarried 9w1d 1/11/23
PG #3: EDD 12/15/23
An older relative told me that she had lost a baby in her second trimester and said she was “mortified.” That description stuck with me.. as well as the feeling (based on how awkward some of my male friends were) that many people weren’t comfortable with me sharing the fact that I was going through a miscarriage when asked certain questions.
I lived with my aunt for a while in my 20s (she was only 10 years older than me so like roommates) & she had a cat who she would refer to as my sister! Firstly, I have a sister, who is an actual human being so thats just insulting to her. & secondly, surely by your theory, she would be my cousin. Either way, WRONG!!
another UO for me - I dislike cats intensely.
And as a side, I don't think disliking cats is as unpopular as you might think. And it's not really a surprise. I adore my cats, but as a rule, cats are a**holes.
My UO is that I'm not a fan of sushi. I'll eat the veggie and cooked chicken kind but I dislike cooked fish let alone raw fish. Fish is nasty.
Edited to add- @leprechaunlady I have 2 cats. I also dislike them 😆. I'm just kidding. But they are 100% a**holes like @peppyj9 said. I hated cats until I owned one.
Also, disagree about sushi. I LOVE sushi! And apparently I can't eat that either for the next 9 months 😩
Edit: had more to add
Another UO of mine is I hate when people call me mama (“you got this mama”). The only person that should be calling me mama/mommy is my 4 year old.
also sushi would be the best to battle my nausea now but I’m staying away for now
I’m also not a fan of cats but that’s just because I’m allergic and I’ve had a dog my whole life
I do hate cats though. This is not an unpopular opinion in my field (environmental science) since they cause a huge amount of ecological damage.
PG #2: EDD 8/15/23 Miscarried 9w1d 1/11/23
PG #3: EDD 12/15/23
Also pet adoption is not the same as adopting a child. Adopting a child is intense! You have to have home studies, criminal background checks, and psych evaluations done among many other time consuming things. It can be crazy expensive! It can be so emotionally draining as you waiting to find a match.
I will say that my BIL & SIL have furbabies. When they come with their animals, I am very careful about teaching my son to be respectful of them. I don't just let him pull on tails or chase after them. I teach him to pet them softly and not to shout or scream at them (even if it's out of excitement, he loves them). I check in with my SIL and ask if we need to give these animals a break from DS. I realize that these animals are very important to them and want to treat them as such. However, I do not be refer to their dog and cat as DS's cousins. I share the same opinion as @leprechaunlady .
Now, I don't have a pet right now, so I could change my tune about the whole furbaby mentality. I don't plan on having a dog until we are done having kids mainly for the reason what @marebear15 said. I don't want to have to give my dog away because I feel like it's all too much. The other reason is that the previous owner's of our house had a black lab. We found dog hair around our house for 6 months after we moved in. It got all over DS as he wasn't walking yet. We thoroughly cleaned (including having the carpets cleaned) before moving in and we still found all of this hair!