@sweetteaandswingsmama you are so right about that “oh shit” moment. It was shortly before I started to push with DS1 I told them i wasn’t ready to be a mom and push him back in 🙈😂
My transition with DS2 was so short that I didn’t get that feeling until the midwife said to push when I was ready. I didn’t feel like I’d ever be ready!
@andromedacorrine2 I think it’s because I had a slow (though rapid in time) ramp up with DS2 whereas with DS1, I went from 0 to 100 within 5 minutes. I also had back labor with DS1, so no break in between contractions
I was due 9/12, and at that appointment my OB did a membrane sweep and assured me I'd have the baby within a day. No dice, so I kept coming back for appointments until we scheduled an induction for 9/22. I checked into the hospital at 5 PM on 9/21 to get a Foley catheter, which was not super fun. The next morning, we started the pitocin around 7 AM. I labored without pain meds until about 10:30, and then got an epidural so I could try to get some sleep. Unfortunately, the epi bag was leaking on the floor, so I wasn't really getting any relief. They brought me a new bag, but also gave me an IV painkiller for the interim. If I could do it again, I would have declined the IV drug because it made me really sick and sleepy.
Around 1 PM, I was dilated enough for my OB to break my water and start pushing. Because I had received a supplemental dose of epi meds, I was unable to move one leg, so DH had to hold it for me. Active labor was only 90 minutes, but I was so tired from the effort and the IV that I kept falling asleep between pushes. I ended up with an episiotomy in order to get him out, but at 3:23 I had my baby! Once DS was born (and we learned he was a he!), it was discovered that he had aspirated meconium in the womb because he was so late. He had a pneumothorax (air around lungs) and needed to be admitted to the NICU for oxygen. I was able to hold him for a few minutes while they did the admission prep, but then he was taken to his room. After being stitched up, the nurses wheeled me through the NICU to see where DS was on my way up to my room.
Recovery for DS was luckily very quick, but because he had been admitted, he needed to stay until all his x-rays came back clear and he passed his 48-hour antibiotics screening. It meant I was discharged a day before he was (although we didn't know that at the time) and that first night home without him was probably the worst night of my life. I am so in awe of people who do it for longer stretches, because it is so so hard. I was a little worried that we would have nursing trouble because DS had been given a pacifier and donated milk by bottle in the NICU before we'd ever had a chance to try latching, but luckily DS was a champion eater and never cared where his food came from.
I had infected stitches twice while healing, but everything healed up fine in the end. I'm pretty sure it was due to the dissolving stitches getting trapped and not actually oozing out. Overall, I am at peace with everything that happened, even though things didn't exactly go right.
I was walking around at 3.5 centimeters from 37 weeks
until 39 weeks having sporadic contractions. Finally, at 39 weeks, I went into
the hospital around 6:00 AM to have my water broken. We had prepared for a
natural labor with Bradley Method, but for some reason, I was surprised by the
pain.
Funny story…burning hot water in the shower nozzle
in the hospital bathroom pointed directly at my tummy helped with the contractions.
I was in there so long that my legs started to turn blue. DH said to the nurse,
“WE NEED HELP! HER LEGS ARE TURNING BLUE!” and the nurse responded, deadpan: “So?”
Anyway, around 5:30 PM later that day, our 8 pound,
12 ounce baby girl arrived! With a third degree tear. WORTH IT. Second Baby
I stayed up until around midnight watching Relation-shep the
night before. At 3:20AM, I woke up to a big contraction that lasted about
45 seconds. I began timing, and they were coming every 2-3 minutes and lasting
a minute. They weren't painful, so we sat around until about 6:30 and we went
into the hospital at 39 weeks, 5 days. The good news is that when I got
there, I was at 4 centimeters…but the bad news is that my doctor logged me at 4
centimeters at 38 weeks. So the contractions did nothing.
At 9 CM and around noon, I began feeling like I had to push
and something was coming out. Turns out, it was cervical prolapse and they gave
me the epidural to take away the need to push. After they placed the epidural,
they fiddled around in there (UGH!), told me to push, and an hour or so later,
baby was here! She was 9 pounds, 6 ounces....and this time, only a second degree tear!.
I tell those stories because I prepared the same way, ate the
same way, and had very similar pregnancies, for very different labors. And it
also soothed me to know that when an emergency struck, the doctors/nurses knew
what to do and everyone was safe and healthy.
I love reading these too! I felt like my labors we're terrible in how long they took. I hope this one doesnt!! Also I forgot to mention I had 3 stitches and 1 stitch, so hoping to stay on that trend 😂 I'm sure there's more details I left out but trying to write it all out was my main focus lol my suggestion going into a 3rd labor is have as fee extra people as possible 😂 With DS, I had all 3 SILs and only one was helpful, she rubbed my lower back/butt where the pain was the worst, my mom, my best friend, my little sister(who I think was traumatized, she keeps saying having a baby is not for her, which is good at 15 anyway😂), my grandma(who kept pushing at my Dr to give me a Csection cause it would be so much easier, since she had one), another friend swung by. With DD, we had our friends come for most of it and they helped SO not be bored since nothing happened til night 2 really. I had a friend come for a bit and my mom. This time round we're having a birth photographer and probably no one else til the baby is born, I just want some peace and quiet😂
I love reading these so much! I had a hard time keeping mine short - so many thoughts and feelings about these days of my life.
Same here I love reading the stores, I'll eventually get to mine lol. I will say this, we actually have a theme song for the weekend our daughter was born. The day I got induced DH's bestie and I were sending each other memes and stuff and sent me this song "Epic Sax Guy", he coined it her theme song. So every year on her birthday we all play it and it brings me right back to that hospital room.
I feel like DS' birth story is a blur but I'm going to do my best to remember. From reading everyone else's story, mine feels like I forgot a lot:
My EDD was 9/8 so my last day of work was 9/5 (Friday). The plan from my OB (I had Kaiser Permanente) was that I would go the following week on Monday, Wednesday and Friday to the hospital for NSTs if labor didn't start over the weekend. Well, it definitely did not start so I went to all those appointments and nothing was mentioned to me. Our plan again on 9/12 then became scheduling induction for Monday the 15th if labor didn't start... So Monday comes and we call L&D and they say wait until noon to come in. We arrive in the afternoon and I believe they start Cervadil as I was maybe 1cm and not sure how effaced. I think I had 2-3 doses of that placed over the next 24 hours, as well as Pitocin started, but I was only up to about 2cm. Since I had wanted to try to go without an epidural for as long as possible, I only had IV meds up until that point. I wasn't in pain but I wasn't super comfortable. I believe they did a Foley bulb and that got me up to 4cm. At that point, I think I felt pressure from the nurses/doctor that my labor wasn't progressing, and I just was getting tired from being uncomfortable, so I opted to get the epidural (since if we had a get a C/S, I would need one anyways). At this point, I had the WORST nurse and I was so scared of needles that I was shaking and crying during the preparation for the epi, she decided to tell me something to the effect of, "you're a big girl, stop crying, you need to buck up" and I felt so little and small. After that was done, I felt some relief and I believe my body was able to really get labor going because I went from a 4 to a 9.5 in about 8 hours. I'm not sure I remember what the contractions felt like, but goodness, I'm dreading being checked and the darn catheter because those were the worst!! During that time, my water also broke on its own and we got ready to push. DS' heart rate during my labor had decels so they were very conscious during delivery and at one point, I think they were wanting to do the C/S but that dreadful nurse (from what MIL tells me) was on my side, saying that they could get the baby out safely. They did had to use the vacuum in the end and I had an episiotomy, but DS was born on 9/17 at 7:09am weighing 7lbs 9oz. He had a 99% percentile head, which in my own opinion, could be why labor was so long and maybe why I had to be induced (like, maybe he didn't descend). Since the cord was wrapped around his neck, they only let me hold him after delivery for a second, and then took him to the NICU, and I wasn't able to go to him for two hours (longest moments of my life) but when I got to see him again, they said he was just fine.
My goal for this labor is hopefully to not be induced, possibly med-free but go in with an open birth plan.
TTC #1: September 2013, BFP 01/01/14, DS 09/14 TTC #2: October 2018, BFP 02/02/19, EDD 10/14/19
@stephanie123456 ugh sorry about your nurse! I feel that plays such an important role during birth and can negatively impact progression! Hopefully this time around if you're not grooving with a nurse, you can kindly tell her to leave. I know I will be using my voice a lot more this time lol
@jal88144 I feel like I will be stronger this time for my own wants and needs because I sort-of know what to expect. A big part of me is really praying that the old-wives tale is true about second labors being easier, because I don't want to be in the hospital for almost a week again.
TTC #1: September 2013, BFP 01/01/14, DS 09/14 TTC #2: October 2018, BFP 02/02/19, EDD 10/14/19
6/28 (Wednesday) - started having mild contractions around 8pm. Decided not to time and just go to sleep. I figured if they were the real deal, they would wake me up. Slept ok that night.
6/29 (Thursday) - woke up still having consistent contractions (5-10 min apart) but they weren't super painful so I decided to go to work. Timed them all morning at work while I tried to wrap up any final lose ends. Around 1pm I decided to go home just in case. Contractions continued until around 8pm when it was like a light switch and they went from like a 2 on the pain scale to a 9. Timed for about an hour while packing (and had DH make me a steak lol). Around 9/930pm we called the OB and left for the hospital around 10. Got to the hospital and it was apparently the busiest they had ever been. They had no beds in triage or L&D so I was forced to labor in the waiting room for like an hour. Finally got a bed in triage around 11 and was only at a 3 so they wouldn't admit me.
6/30 (Friday) - An hour later I was still at at 3 and they tried to send me home (around midnight), saying to come back when they were more painful. At this point I was in tears telling DH that I didn't understand how they could possibly get more painful. Thank God, he was my advocate and said we were NOT leaving. They said I could labor there another hour or so and see if i progressed. Around 130 they checked me and I was at a 4.5ish (pretty sure they just wanted to get rid of me at this point lol) so they admitted me. Beds were still full in L&D so we had to wait a bit. Around 3 I got to my room and immediately got the epi. Around 4am DH and I were going to try to get some rest. The nurse came to check me first so that she could let me sleep for a bit and I was at a 10!! I ended up waiting a bit to push because my sister was supposed to take birth photos but we hadn't called her yet. She flew there as fast as she could. Pushed for about 30-45 min and DD arrived around 5:50am.
@stephanie123456 I feel like the pushing part of my second labor was much better, it literally took 8 minutes to push her out. The induction part, hers was longer. The pain was more manageable because I knew what to expect. I had only one nurse I couldn't stand. It was with DS, she got huffy with me at 4 am when DS wouldn't stay latched and kept crying and crying. She came in and said "please tell me what's wrong now?" I had called the LC before once after he was born for latch help. All of my other nurses both times were so amazing. I actually had 2 of the same ones with both labors! They both were like Oh you're back! I hate needles with a passion(I nearly pass out at the blood draws) and aside from anything including needles, all my nurses always said I was a good patient. With DS I had one stay over an hour after shift change cause she was determined to see that baby born. She helped catch him 😊 definitely use your voice. Don't let anyone be rude or overbearing, you already have a lot going on ❤️
not birth related but I had my appendix out at 18 cause it almost burst and my blood clotted, so they couldn't run the tests properly. The nurse came back and said they needed more and I was nearly out already from freaking. The ER nurse YELLED at me for clenching my veins(I didn't know you could do that?) Cause I was so scared, all alone in the room cause they wouldn't let my mom and boyfriend at the time back and I was upset. She threatened to take it out of my toe and I instantly went limp when she said that. I hate mean nurses like that.
I had a great team of L&D nurses both times. But I had a recovery nurse with my daughter who in hindsight I should've reported. But I was a bleary eyed new mom, no longer sure of anything, and I just assumed she was doing her job.
I'm pretty sure I already shared DS2's birth story, but here are both for comparison because they were massively different and both traumatic in their own ways. DS1: EDD was 6/12, birthday is 5/31, team blue... My water broke in a slow leak around 5pm on a Saturday evening. I didn't know this was my water breaking. It felt like one drop of liquid/pee every few minutes. (I now know that colorless and odorless is your water breaking, FYI) We had recently moved to a new neighborhood and a friend was hosting a welcome party for us, so since I didn't know my water was breaking, we still went to the party. Fast forward to the end of the night and literally this leak is still consistently happening every few min. DH convinces me to call the on call number just in case, and the doctor says, "Yep! Sounds like it's your water. Just come in for a check." So we pack some bags and drive to the hospital in disbelief truly believing we are about to be sent home. Arrive at 1am, and on the elevator up to L&D my water DOES break in a huge gush. Feels like water pouring out like you're peeing, only you can't stop it. Since I'm soaking wet, I am ushered to a room right away, and the OB comes in within 10 min and says, "Well you're definitely here to stay since your water broke." Contractions start around 2:30am and I'm all "this isn't THAT terrible." I decide to wait for the epidural until they are worse. About 30 min later I am hating life. My incredible nurse had read my mind, ordered my epi, and the anesthesiologist was there right away. So I literally only had 30 min of contractions. We gets some naps, wake up around 6am, and I'm at an 8! Easiest labor ever, right?! I start pushing at 8:30am and this is when the trauma starts... ugh... DS1 was sunny side up (head down, but face up). I push for three and half hours! I am a pretty fit person and it is mind boggling to me that I cannot get him out. After three hours, DS1's heart rate is dropping, I am freaking out crying and they put me on oxygen. I have no idea how this baby is going to get the eff out. OB goes into super coach mode. (PS. The entire time I was pushing I didn't know DS1 was sunny side up.) Finally, one big push and he's just out at 11:53am. OB says "you can be very proud of yourself because I almost always have to do a C for sunny side up babies." (Not that those who had a C shouldn't be proud, I would have absolutely done a C right away if that's what it came to!) I had a standard 2nd degree tear and pretty bad hemorrhoids from pushing so hard for so long (DH said I didn't poop though! LOL) I literally looked like I was beaten with a baseball bat--popped a blood vessel in one eye, face was kind of swollen. DS1 was also swollen and red and looked like he'd had a rough journey. For months, I was pretty traumatized from pushing for 3.5 hours. I didn't think I could do childbirth again. Pregnancy had been easy, but childbirth was so. damn. hard. Due to his being sunny side up, my doctors all kept saying, "well, he paved the way for the next one..." DS2: EDD 7/8, birthday is 6/25, team green... We had a wedding on Saturday night 6/24. It was a family wedding on DH's side. I was the driver for basically anyone who could fit in our car. On the drive home as I am being entertained by all the tipsy conversations, I feel that same slow leak as I did with DS1. Only this time it's followed by a tiny gas bubble feeling. It happens every 5-10 min. I drop off ILs at home and as I'm pulling out of the neighborhood I casually say to DH, "I'm kinda feeling the same way I did the night DS1 was born." He gives me a you're-kidding look. We pull into our driveway at exactly midnight on the dot. When I step out of the car my water breaks in a massive gush (at least I was outside this time). Get to the hospital at 12:30am (we live 5 min away) and it's crowded. Registration is fast and easy, but I can tell they don't want to have to admit me. Everything goes downhill from here. I get assigned the worst nurse in triage who basically doesn't believe me that my water broke because she can't see water dripping off my legs. Ummm, seriously? It happened 45 min ago, I have since dried myself off thank you. Triage is basically full so we have to go into a bathroom together (!!!) for me to lift my dress for her to see...I don't even know what. Finally, she rubs this pH paper on a wet spot on my dress and is convinced. We get the last room in triage. It's about 12:50am now and my contractions really start--6 min apart and painful. I keep asking when the doctor is going to come see me and she just says "soon." I tell her I have no birth plan other than I want an epidural. We're in triage for an hour. The doctor never comes, I am never checked to see how far dilated I am. DH is pissed and anytime someone walks by he asks for help. Finally, Bad Nurse comes back and says I am next on the list for a L&D room b/c it's my second and b/c my water has broken. Contractions are 1 min apart and I literally think I am going to have this baby in triage. We are moved to a room just before 2am. My epi is ordered, but there is absolutely no relief between contractions now. They are boom, boom, boom one behind the other. The OB on call FINALLY comes in to see me. This is the first time I have seen him all night (the first time I have met him ever). He says, "I can see you're in the middle of a contraction so I'll come back in a few." And I scream, "Do Not Leave! As soon as this one is done there is another one right behind it." He steps to the side, says something to Bad Nurse and a moment later asks if I feel pressure and the urge to push. I scream YES. He calmly tells me there won't be time for the epidural. But I don't even care at this point. Stirrups go up, paper gown goes on, extra nurses flood the room, and two pushes later DS2 is here, sans epidural, at 2:19am. Exactly 2 hours and 19 min from when my water broke. It was such chaos that I completely forgot we were team green. DH starts saying "It's a boy! It's a boy!" which was an exciting moment and brought me back to reality. In the end, not having an epidural made for an incredibly fast recovery. I was up and around my recovery room that same day. A little sore, but nothing compared to DS1. That said, I definitely plan to have an epidural with #3 if there is time. The contractions are absolutely unbearable (to me). Wow, that was so long. For all you FTMs, you can do ANYTHING!
"Contractions start around 2:30am and I'm all "this isn't THAT terrible." I decide to wait for the epidural until they are worse. About 30 min later I am hating life."
STUCK IN THE BOX I laughed when I read this part because I felt the same way when contractions started with my first. I was like "this is what all the fuss is about? I've totally got this." Which after a few hours became "THIS is what all the fuss is about. I don't think I can do this."
(Note to FTMs: With my second I had done more mental preparation though, and handled them a lot better.)
Speaking of mentally preparing for #2 (or any subsequent birth), what are you STM+ moms doing, or going to do? Or you just will know from last time once it happens?
I’m a STM but I’m trying to figure out how to mentally prepare again, and be ready for anything as we know how quickly birth “plans” can go out the window. I feel like this is going so fast and I almost haven’t wrapped my head around the fact that in ~19 weeks it’s all happening again. This may be something to go back to my therapist about but I feel like the reality isn’t hitting me yet 😳
@melanier26 My hospital does a “refresher course” on labor comfort measures for STMs. The FTM course was something like 12 hours over 2-3 days. This one is something like 2 hours. I’m planning to take that in 3rd trimester.
@jal88144 I’m worried #3 will be what Bad Nurse called a “stop n drop” ...when you get to the lobby and the baby basically comes out right there. 🙊 @cmbt2 I delivered both while on my back in a bed, though I know this seems like an patriarchal method. The stirrups help for leverage though. @ineedsixeggs Right! Which is why going into it with DS2 I was certain I’d get the epi immediately. No such luck. @melanier26 I’m not ready to mentally prepare yet. Lol. But when I get closer I’ll just keep telling myself that whatever happens I can do anything for a day or two. The payoff is greater than the pain.
@stephanie123456 wow you’ve had some doozy of nurses in your experiences. I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with so much of that. I swear we’re not all like that and try to be a comfort to a nervous patient.
@melanier26 I read a lot about hypnobirthing and just having a positive mindset (I didn't actually take the course because of the cost). The contractions were waves pushing the baby closer and all that jazz. I accepted them and moved with them instead of bracing myself against them.
@melanier26 with DD, I got really bad anxiety right before induction and I look back and wish desperately I had done something to prepare again. Since I was little, labor has always terrified me. Even having been through it twice now, I'm still a little worried in the back of my head. But honestly the 2nd time went so much smoother because I knew what to expect mostly and had a better pain management plan. It also helped to have some of the same nurses there still 😊
Being a FTM I really didn't understand enough of what was going on with me, my body or DS. Unfortunately I was one who didn't take any classes thinking it's just breathe deep, right? Looking back though, I don't think they would have covered some of the things that scared me anyway. We did do a L&D tour though that our hospital gives and that gave me most of our instruction, such as when to come in.
DS was due 10/20. I believe I stopped working one week prior so I was home and staying up late that last week due to third tri pregsomnia. The night of 10/22, SO had gone to bed already and it was around midnight, I was up watching tv and started to get mild cramps. The only thing that tipped me off to this being contractions starting was that I started to notice them being regular. So I Googled it and yup, they were starting but they were spaced at about 7 minutes. I don't remember how long they lasted. The L&D nurse on tour had said to not worry about them until they got to five minutes or less in between so I decided to go to bed thinking it might be the last rest I get for a while. I was able to fall asleep but only for a few hours before the cramps woke me back up, around 4, I think. So this time when I timed them, they had dropped to four and a half minutes. I forgot to mention that for the several weeks before this, I was genuinely scared of trying to get the baby out. You really don't think about it much until that last month if pregnancy, and then it's like oh s#@t, I don't know if I wanna do this anymore. So instead of waking SO I kind of putzed around, getting things ready and delaying as much as I could. I also wanted to let him sleep as long as possible. Around about 5 though, contractions were 4 minutes apart and I started to throw up with each one. That's when I finally woke up SO and said I think it's time to go. He was not at all happy that I waited and would barely even give me time to get a grocery bag from the pantry to catch vomit on the ride. (My cats used to jump into the pile of them and knead their paws so I was looking for one without holes.) Instead I just grabbed a second bag and we left. Hospital is a 50 minute drive for us and for me the contractions were still manageable but I was still getting sick every time, and it was the roll your eyes back in your head, hold on to something, toxemia type of nausea, like your worst hangover pain, that's what was getting me. Got to the hospital right before 6 and now contractions are almost 3 minutes and finally getting painful, taking my breath, and making me stop bent over in my tracks for the duration, around 30 seconds, so they admit me right away. Luckily the vomiting had slowed by now to every few contractions, but as soon as they got me a room I had to run straight to the toilet because now I was getting sick from both ends.
Now here's the kicker, the big joke my body was playing on me that I still don't understand. All these cues had me believing we're pretty close, but the nurse goes to check me once I'm in the bed, rolls her eyes and says, "1 cm dilated". Ahhh! I'm still vomiting a bit at this point, but now only bile so they gave me a little hospital baggie and hooked me up to the monitors. DS's heart rate decelerated with each contraction (I lost track of how far between at this point). Doc came in at this point, around half hour after being hooked up, and after a bit of consultation with the nurses said he wanted to go in for a C/S. I could have asked what was going on and why, but I didn't. I've had this doctor for years as it's my GYN doc and I just adore and trust him so I went right along with it. I could tell he was concerned, and though I can only guess right now since I didn't ask at the time, I think we went that way because there was no way I was getting to 10cm any time soon, and with the decels it probably couldn't wait that long. I was in the operating room within half hour. My doc had me sit up and he just gave me this big warm hug, I almost didn't feel the epi go in. He laid me out on the table and DS was out in 15 minutes. (Ugh I could feel the tugging of him being taken out, it was so weird!) Born @ 8:27 on 10/23. I only got to see him quickly before they took him away to the NICU due to both breathing in and swallowing meconium. Sadly he did have a 4 day stay there, the last day because they were concerned he wouldn't take enough food down. That last 2 days of feeding him I remember just begging him to eat more, eat more, or they won't let you come home with us (I got released a day earlier). So all in all it went somewhat quickly for me, albeit confusing, but to be honest I was glad for the C/S. Not knowing how much DS was at risk the longer he stayed in me, and just the plain fact that I didn't have to walk up and down the halls with my IV for 2 days as I saw other women do. Maybe I'm a bit of a wimp for that, but oh well. I'm going to attempt a VBAC for this little one if conditions allow, but I'll be honest, I'm already super nervous at the thought.
Me: 41 / Fiance: 35 + One DS, one dog & two kitties...
First BFP: 1/17/16 = EDD 9/21/16 (MMC)
Second BFP: 6/24/16 (CP)
Third BFP: 2/7/17 = EDD 10/20/17 🌈 *** BORN 10/23 *** 🌈
@cooaladolly you’re so right about the “oh shit” moment. For some reason it hit me late with DD1 and not sure at all with DD2...but when I found out I was pregnant this time... it was immediately. It still crosses my mind and i have to stop myself from panicking ℓσℓ I’m sorry that everything felt so traumatic. You’re right that taking classes prior may not have changed your outcome. It likely may have helped with your nerves and understanding what was going on.
I wish all Dr’s would be more forthcoming with info. Not in a million years should you be put through a scary situation without some sort of explanation even if it’s while you’re being wheeled into surgery. Thankfully he was a dr you knew and trusted 💜
DD#1 December '12
DD#2 New Year's Baby '15
Married 07/09
@melanier26 I read a lot about hypnobirthing and just having a positive mindset (I didn't actually take the course because of the cost). The contractions were waves pushing the baby closer and all that jazz. I accepted them and moved with them instead of bracing myself against them.
Agree with this! I also focused on my DH's face during the worst of them and had him count out loud. The worst ones lasted, at most, 90 seconds so it was comforting to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I kept thinking, "Only 30 more seconds...", "Only 15 more seconds.." and usually, they would stop earlier.
My birth stories are pretty unspectacular. With DD1 she'd gone over by a week and the hospital induces at 1 week over EDD, so we had an appointment for an induction that day at 6pm. Well I woke up at 6am with crampy feelings and tried to make them go away with a bath and stuff like that. Nope, they got worse. Contractions. We drove up to the hospital and the nurse who checked me didn't tell me what she was going to do so when she did a manual check of my cervix they practically had to peel me off the ceiling.
The midwives put us in a delivery room and more or less left us alone for the next 6 hours, with nothing much happening besides contractions. Labor wasn't progressing so they gave me something via IV (not an epidural) to lessen the pain a bit. Didn't work and I was still at like, what 4 cm? No idea. Finally after another 6 hours my water broke and it had meconium in it, so that, coupled with the fact that DD1 was still waaaaay up there and hadn't traveled down one bit, made the Dr go for a CS. DD1 was out 4 minutes later (advantage of a large birth hospital).
Personally, the CS was great. No more pain, recovery was in like 3 days, I don't mind the scar.
So when I was pregnant with DD2 I said I'd try to go for a VBAC, but this was mostly because I knew we wanted three kids and three CS was maybe not quite the way to go. The midwife at the birthing class for STM+ pretty bluntly told me the midwives shouldn't have let me lay around during labor for DD1 and should have sent me up and down the stairs to get DD1's head down into the birth canal. Firmly believing this, when 2 days post EDD my waters broke in bed at 6am (it was like a popping sound and when I got out of bed I proceeded to soak the floor), I told my SO I'd simply have to move a lot more this time around and I'd get my VBAC.
Haha. Those contractions came on really quickly, really hard and I was pretty much crouched over the toilet bowl while SO had to bring a sobbing DD1 to DC (my parents, who were supposed to be on kid duty, weren't answering their phones...argh). When he came back I stuffed a diaper in my underwear and we walked to the hospital (we live right across the st). The midwives tried to get me onto a bed but even in between contractions it really hurt, so they were worried about a potential rupture along the previous CS scar. They checked and I was already at an 8 or 9, I think? But the baby was, once again, nowhere near the exit. Cue CS#2. Wheeled into the OR and presto, baby in my arms 30 minutes after checking into the hospital. SO was breathing with me and counting the lenght of the contractions while they were prepping the OR and the midwives were all "good for you mr skittle" and I wanted to snarl at them that I'd been doing the same fricking thing but nobody gave ME a cookie for counting.
So there. Apparently my hips are plenty wide but the birth canal isn't so babies like to get stuck up there. Fun.
Re: Birth Stories from the STMs+
you are so right about that “oh shit” moment. It was shortly before I started to push with DS1 I told them i wasn’t ready to be a mom and push him back in 🙈😂
My transition with DS2 was so short that I didn’t get that feeling until the midwife said to push when I was ready. I didn’t feel like I’d ever be ready!
@andromedacorrine2 I think it’s because I had a slow (though rapid in time) ramp up with DS2 whereas with DS1, I went from 0 to 100 within 5 minutes. I also had back labor with DS1, so no break in between contractions
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BFP #2 5/4/14, EDD 1/15/15, DS1 1/19/15
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Around 1 PM, I was dilated enough for my OB to break my water and start pushing. Because I had received a supplemental dose of epi meds, I was unable to move one leg, so DH had to hold it for me. Active labor was only 90 minutes, but I was so tired from the effort and the IV that I kept falling asleep between pushes. I ended up with an episiotomy in order to get him out, but at 3:23 I had my baby! Once DS was born (and we learned he was a he!), it was discovered that he had aspirated meconium in the womb because he was so late. He had a pneumothorax (air around lungs) and needed to be admitted to the NICU for oxygen. I was able to hold him for a few minutes while they did the admission prep, but then he was taken to his room. After being stitched up, the nurses wheeled me through the NICU to see where DS was on my way up to my room.
Recovery for DS was luckily very quick, but because he had been admitted, he needed to stay until all his x-rays came back clear and he passed his 48-hour antibiotics screening. It meant I was discharged a day before he was (although we didn't know that at the time) and that first night home without him was probably the worst night of my life. I am so in awe of people who do it for longer stretches, because it is so so hard. I was a little worried that we would have nursing trouble because DS had been given a pacifier and donated milk by bottle in the NICU before we'd ever had a chance to try latching, but luckily DS was a champion eater and never cared where his food came from.
I had infected stitches twice while healing, but everything healed up fine in the end. I'm pretty sure it was due to the dissolving stitches getting trapped and not actually oozing out. Overall, I am at peace with everything that happened, even though things didn't exactly go right.
I LOVE THESE.
First Baby
I was walking around at 3.5 centimeters from 37 weeks until 39 weeks having sporadic contractions. Finally, at 39 weeks, I went into the hospital around 6:00 AM to have my water broken. We had prepared for a natural labor with Bradley Method, but for some reason, I was surprised by the pain.
Funny story…burning hot water in the shower nozzle in the hospital bathroom pointed directly at my tummy helped with the contractions. I was in there so long that my legs started to turn blue. DH said to the nurse, “WE NEED HELP! HER LEGS ARE TURNING BLUE!” and the nurse responded, deadpan: “So?”
Anyway, around 5:30 PM later that day, our 8 pound, 12 ounce baby girl arrived! With a third degree tear. WORTH IT.
Second Baby
I stayed up until around midnight watching Relation-shep the night before. At 3:20AM, I woke up to a big contraction that lasted about 45 seconds. I began timing, and they were coming every 2-3 minutes and lasting a minute. They weren't painful, so we sat around until about 6:30 and we went into the hospital at 39 weeks, 5 days. The good news is that when I got there, I was at 4 centimeters…but the bad news is that my doctor logged me at 4 centimeters at 38 weeks. So the contractions did nothing.
At 9 CM and around noon, I began feeling like I had to push and something was coming out. Turns out, it was cervical prolapse and they gave me the epidural to take away the need to push. After they placed the epidural, they fiddled around in there (UGH!), told me to push, and an hour or so later, baby was here! She was 9 pounds, 6 ounces....and this time, only a second degree tear!.
I tell those stories because I prepared the same way, ate the same way, and had very similar pregnancies, for very different labors. And it also soothed me to know that when an emergency struck, the doctors/nurses knew what to do and everyone was safe and healthy.
With DS, I had all 3 SILs and only one was helpful, she rubbed my lower back/butt where the pain was the worst, my mom, my best friend, my little sister(who I think was traumatized, she keeps saying having a baby is not for her, which is good at 15 anyway😂), my grandma(who kept pushing at my Dr to give me a Csection cause it would be so much easier, since she had one), another friend swung by. With DD, we had our friends come for most of it and they helped SO not be bored since nothing happened til night 2 really. I had a friend come for a bit and my mom. This time round we're having a birth photographer and probably no one else til the baby is born, I just want some peace and quiet😂
My EDD was 9/8 so my last day of work was 9/5 (Friday). The plan from my OB (I had Kaiser Permanente) was that I would go the following week on Monday, Wednesday and Friday to the hospital for NSTs if labor didn't start over the weekend. Well, it definitely did not start so I went to all those appointments and nothing was mentioned to me. Our plan again on 9/12 then became scheduling induction for Monday the 15th if labor didn't start... So Monday comes and we call L&D and they say wait until noon to come in. We arrive in the afternoon and I believe they start Cervadil as I was maybe 1cm and not sure how effaced. I think I had 2-3 doses of that placed over the next 24 hours, as well as Pitocin started, but I was only up to about 2cm. Since I had wanted to try to go without an epidural for as long as possible, I only had IV meds up until that point. I wasn't in pain but I wasn't super comfortable. I believe they did a Foley bulb and that got me up to 4cm. At that point, I think I felt pressure from the nurses/doctor that my labor wasn't progressing, and I just was getting tired from being uncomfortable, so I opted to get the epidural (since if we had a get a C/S, I would need one anyways). At this point, I had the WORST nurse and I was so scared of needles that I was shaking and crying during the preparation for the epi, she decided to tell me something to the effect of, "you're a big girl, stop crying, you need to buck up" and I felt so little and small. After that was done, I felt some relief and I believe my body was able to really get labor going because I went from a 4 to a 9.5 in about 8 hours. I'm not sure I remember what the contractions felt like, but goodness, I'm dreading being checked and the darn catheter because those were the worst!! During that time, my water also broke on its own and we got ready to push. DS' heart rate during my labor had decels so they were very conscious during delivery and at one point, I think they were wanting to do the C/S but that dreadful nurse (from what MIL tells me) was on my side, saying that they could get the baby out safely. They did had to use the vacuum in the end and I had an episiotomy, but DS was born on 9/17 at 7:09am weighing 7lbs 9oz. He had a 99% percentile head, which in my own opinion, could be why labor was so long and maybe why I had to be induced (like, maybe he didn't descend). Since the cord was wrapped around his neck, they only let me hold him after delivery for a second, and then took him to the NICU, and I wasn't able to go to him for two hours (longest moments of my life) but when I got to see him again, they said he was just fine.
My goal for this labor is hopefully to not be induced, possibly med-free but go in with an open birth plan.
TTC #2: October 2018, BFP 02/02/19, EDD 10/14/19
TTC #2: October 2018, BFP 02/02/19, EDD 10/14/19
6/28 (Wednesday) - started having mild contractions around 8pm. Decided not to time and just go to sleep. I figured if they were the real deal, they would wake me up. Slept ok that night.
6/29 (Thursday) - woke up still having consistent contractions (5-10 min apart) but they weren't super painful so I decided to go to work. Timed them all morning at work while I tried to wrap up any final lose ends. Around 1pm I decided to go home just in case. Contractions continued until around 8pm when it was like a light switch and they went from like a 2 on the pain scale to a 9. Timed for about an hour while packing (and had DH make me a steak lol). Around 9/930pm we called the OB and left for the hospital around 10. Got to the hospital and it was apparently the busiest they had ever been. They had no beds in triage or L&D so I was forced to labor in the waiting room for like an hour. Finally got a bed in triage around 11 and was only at a 3 so they wouldn't admit me.
6/30 (Friday) - An hour later I was still at at 3 and they tried to send me home (around midnight), saying to come back when they were more painful. At this point I was in tears telling DH that I didn't understand how they could possibly get more painful. Thank God, he was my advocate and said we were NOT leaving. They said I could labor there another hour or so and see if i progressed. Around 130 they checked me and I was at a 4.5ish (pretty sure they just wanted to get rid of me at this point lol) so they admitted me. Beds were still full in L&D so we had to wait a bit. Around 3 I got to my room and immediately got the epi. Around 4am DH and I were going to try to get some rest. The nurse came to check me first so that she could let me sleep for a bit and I was at a 10!! I ended up waiting a bit to push because my sister was supposed to take birth photos but we hadn't called her yet. She flew there as fast as she could. Pushed for about 30-45 min and DD arrived around 5:50am.
not birth related but I had my appendix out at 18 cause it almost burst and my blood clotted, so they couldn't run the tests properly. The nurse came back and said they needed more and I was nearly out already from freaking. The ER nurse YELLED at me for clenching my veins(I didn't know you could do that?) Cause I was so scared, all alone in the room cause they wouldn't let my mom and boyfriend at the time back and I was upset. She threatened to take it out of my toe and I instantly went limp when she said that. I hate mean nurses like that.
DS1: EDD was 6/12, birthday is 5/31, team blue... My water broke in a slow leak around 5pm on a Saturday evening. I didn't know this was my water breaking. It felt like one drop of liquid/pee every few minutes. (I now know that colorless and odorless is your water breaking, FYI) We had recently moved to a new neighborhood and a friend was hosting a welcome party for us, so since I didn't know my water was breaking, we still went to the party. Fast forward to the end of the night and literally this leak is still consistently happening every few min. DH convinces me to call the on call number just in case, and the doctor says, "Yep! Sounds like it's your water. Just come in for a check." So we pack some bags and drive to the hospital in disbelief truly believing we are about to be sent home. Arrive at 1am, and on the elevator up to L&D my water DOES break in a huge gush. Feels like water pouring out like you're peeing, only you can't stop it. Since I'm soaking wet, I am ushered to a room right away, and the OB comes in within 10 min and says, "Well you're definitely here to stay since your water broke." Contractions start around 2:30am and I'm all "this isn't THAT terrible." I decide to wait for the epidural until they are worse. About 30 min later I am hating life. My incredible nurse had read my mind, ordered my epi, and the anesthesiologist was there right away. So I literally only had 30 min of contractions. We gets some naps, wake up around 6am, and I'm at an 8! Easiest labor ever, right?! I start pushing at 8:30am and this is when the trauma starts... ugh... DS1 was sunny side up (head down, but face up). I push for three and half hours! I am a pretty fit person and it is mind boggling to me that I cannot get him out. After three hours, DS1's heart rate is dropping, I am freaking out crying and they put me on oxygen. I have no idea how this baby is going to get the eff out. OB goes into super coach mode. (PS. The entire time I was pushing I didn't know DS1 was sunny side up.) Finally, one big push and he's just out at 11:53am. OB says "you can be very proud of yourself because I almost always have to do a C for sunny side up babies." (Not that those who had a C shouldn't be proud, I would have absolutely done a C right away if that's what it came to!) I had a standard 2nd degree tear and pretty bad hemorrhoids from pushing so hard for so long (DH said I didn't poop though! LOL) I literally looked like I was beaten with a baseball bat--popped a blood vessel in one eye, face was kind of swollen. DS1 was also swollen and red and looked like he'd had a rough journey. For months, I was pretty traumatized from pushing for 3.5 hours. I didn't think I could do childbirth again. Pregnancy had been easy, but childbirth was so. damn. hard. Due to his being sunny side up, my doctors all kept saying, "well, he paved the way for the next one..."
DS2: EDD 7/8, birthday is 6/25, team green... We had a wedding on Saturday night 6/24. It was a family wedding on DH's side. I was the driver for basically anyone who could fit in our car. On the drive home as I am being entertained by all the tipsy conversations, I feel that same slow leak as I did with DS1. Only this time it's followed by a tiny gas bubble feeling. It happens every 5-10 min. I drop off ILs at home and as I'm pulling out of the neighborhood I casually say to DH, "I'm kinda feeling the same way I did the night DS1 was born." He gives me a you're-kidding look. We pull into our driveway at exactly midnight on the dot. When I step out of the car my water breaks in a massive gush (at least I was outside this time). Get to the hospital at 12:30am (we live 5 min away) and it's crowded. Registration is fast and easy, but I can tell they don't want to have to admit me. Everything goes downhill from here. I get assigned the worst nurse in triage who basically doesn't believe me that my water broke because she can't see water dripping off my legs. Ummm, seriously? It happened 45 min ago, I have since dried myself off thank you. Triage is basically full so we have to go into a bathroom together (!!!) for me to lift my dress for her to see...I don't even know what. Finally, she rubs this pH paper on a wet spot on my dress and is convinced. We get the last room in triage. It's about 12:50am now and my contractions really start--6 min apart and painful. I keep asking when the doctor is going to come see me and she just says "soon." I tell her I have no birth plan other than I want an epidural. We're in triage for an hour. The doctor never comes, I am never checked to see how far dilated I am. DH is pissed and anytime someone walks by he asks for help. Finally, Bad Nurse comes back and says I am next on the list for a L&D room b/c it's my second and b/c my water has broken. Contractions are 1 min apart and I literally think I am going to have this baby in triage. We are moved to a room just before 2am. My epi is ordered, but there is absolutely no relief between contractions now. They are boom, boom, boom one behind the other. The OB on call FINALLY comes in to see me. This is the first time I have seen him all night (the first time I have met him ever). He says, "I can see you're in the middle of a contraction so I'll come back in a few." And I scream, "Do Not Leave! As soon as this one is done there is another one right behind it." He steps to the side, says something to Bad Nurse and a moment later asks if I feel pressure and the urge to push. I scream YES. He calmly tells me there won't be time for the epidural. But I don't even care at this point. Stirrups go up, paper gown goes on, extra nurses flood the room, and two pushes later DS2 is here, sans epidural, at 2:19am. Exactly 2 hours and 19 min from when my water broke. It was such chaos that I completely forgot we were team green. DH starts saying "It's a boy! It's a boy!" which was an exciting moment and brought me back to reality. In the end, not having an epidural made for an incredibly fast recovery. I was up and around my recovery room that same day. A little sore, but nothing compared to DS1. That said, I definitely plan to have an epidural with #3 if there is time. The contractions are absolutely unbearable (to me).
Wow, that was so long. For all you FTMs, you can do ANYTHING!
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BFP #2 5/4/14, EDD 1/15/15, DS1 1/19/15
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I’m a STM but I’m trying to figure out how to mentally prepare again, and be ready for anything as we know how quickly birth “plans” can go out the window. I feel like this is going so fast and I almost haven’t wrapped my head around the fact that in ~19 weeks it’s all happening again. This may be something to go back to my therapist about but I feel like the reality isn’t hitting me yet 😳
@cmbt2 I delivered both while on my back in a bed, though I know this seems like an patriarchal method. The stirrups help for leverage though.
@ineedsixeggs Right! Which is why going into it with DS2 I was certain I’d get the epi immediately. No such luck.
@melanier26 I’m not ready to mentally prepare yet. Lol. But when I get closer I’ll just keep telling myself that whatever happens I can do anything for a day or two. The payoff is greater than the pain.
HX
DSD: 17
DS: 4(Nov'14)
MMC:8/17
MMC: 1/18
BFP: 2/7/19 EDD:10/16/19
Tickers
I’m sorry that everything felt so traumatic. You’re right that taking classes prior may not have changed your outcome. It likely may have helped with your nerves and understanding what was going on.
I wish all Dr’s would be more forthcoming with info. Not in a million years should you be put through a scary situation without some sort of explanation even if it’s while you’re being wheeled into surgery. Thankfully he was a dr you knew and trusted 💜
DD#1 December '12
DD#2 New Year's Baby '15
Married 07/09