***General TW that this thread might contain discussions mentioning MC and loss.***
Welcome to Waiting Room Wednesday! You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on not TTC and connect with others who are in the same boat. TTC can be a long journey, and having to wait makes it feel even longer -- even if it is for a good reason.
I invite you to resurrect this thread at any point in the month if you have something to say. Treat this like an ongoing conversation.
Benched = involuntarily not NTNP/TTC and "out of the game," usually due to medical reasons TTA = avoiding pregnancy by using protection or FAM, usually for non-health-related reasons
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When do you think you will start TTC?
What brings you to WRW?
Any R/R?
GTKY: What is your most fond family summer memory as a child? (a family tradition, a specific vacation/experience)
Re: WRW - May 2019
I'm back! (looking @ you @jackie_dunny). Hesitantly for now, but I've been gone for a few months! Sorry for all of you I don't know, I'll try to catch up. I got real frustrated when the threads kept getting deleted for a while because of drama and I peaced out for a few months!
Anyways.
When do you think you will start TTC? IF we decide to have a third, I want to start trying in August of this year. We have a destination wedding to go to in Iceland in Feb. 2020, and I really want to go (last babymoon opportunity), and that will put me at about the 6 month mark. I'd hopefully feel comfortable to go since last 2 babies were 40 weeks on the dot.
What brings you to WRW Well, I've been gone from here for a few months. I got laid off from my job, unemployed, got a new job, started in March, but in order to get FMLA I need to wait a minimum of 3 months before TTGP so I'll have been at my new job for a year. So here I am, still completely lost as to if we should have a third, and 6 months has gone by and I'm still stuck in my own head about it.
Any R/R?
Rant: My oldest (Q) - 2 yrs 9 months - has been acting up recently and I'm trying all these ways to get him to listen to me and all I can say is that I'm NOT a toddler whisperer, and I hope this is a short phase.
Rave: My DH has been hard at work in a sunroom renovation over the last month, and it's finally at a point that it's safe for the kids to play in! which means all the toys can get out of my every day living area! woohoo!
GTKY: My favorite memories as a child were family vacations in our travel trailer. I didn't often get along with my brother, but for some reason when we were on vacation and away from our house we did, so I have great memories of bike rides, fishing, and swimming at campgrounds up and down the east coast. We're doing our first family camping trip next month and I'm so hopeful DS1 and DS2 will enjoy it as much as I did!
P.S. What is protocol these days w/r/t mention of existing kids? Happy to TW if that's preference.
When do you think you will start TTC? Soon. Hopefully. DS will be one year in early July, and we'd originally planned to start TTC around now, but I'm still waiting on my period.
What brings you to WRW? That darn MIA period... oh and as for why today specifically, the ladies from by BMB last go-round were randomly talking about their old bump names in our facebook group today, and it made me nostalgic.
Any R/R? Weather has been beautiful here, and we're trying to spend as much time as possible outside before the mosquitoes and humidity set in and ruin it all.
GTKY: Until age 9, our backyard backed up to the local YMCA and we pretty much lived at the pool all summer. We'd walk home late afternoon and have ice cream sandwiches on the porch and it was glorious.
@mamaqdubu I'm jealous of your Iceland wedding and also very impressed that you're going to brave camping with two little ones! Will it be just a weekend trip or something longer?
As far as TW, I don't know. I just usually *TW* at the beginning of mine just in case, but they are so much of my life I end up doing it for every single post.
That's awesome that you lived next to a YMCA! and how fun that you got to live at the pool with lots of other people/friends too!
We're only camping for 2 nights, and we're going with our friends who own a camper and have a 3 month old. It's definitely not going to be relaxing, but it will be worth it to see the look on their faces when they eat their first s'more!
Hello everyone! Sounds like we have all participated in the bump before. I participated in the TTGP board in 2016, but wasn't as active in my baby month board because it was just too hard for me to keep up with. I now have a son born July 2017, and we are getting ready to try for #2. I also need to learn the new TW rules - I was lurking on some of the boards and it looks like things have gotten stricter with more hidden text? Not saying it's a bad thing but just need to make sure I understand before I move over.
When do you think you will start TTC? Probably won't start trying until October. We recently did a PCS move to Germany for my civilian job with DoD. We got here last November, and it's taken awhile to get settled in. DH has started a new job that he would like to get a little more established in first. We also have some travel plans, and family visiting us this summer. I want to hold off on pregnancy a bit so that I can enjoy those experiences, and get a little more comfortable with our new life here first. I'm pretty nervous about having a baby overseas, but we don't want to wait to try until we get back (Nov 2021). I really don't want to have that big of an age gap between kids, and we would ideally hope to have 3 total someday.
I want to try to be more active in this online community since I will be away from family and friends this go around.
What brings you to WRW? Just to help pass the time a bit! Hopefully get to know some of you.
Any R/R? I'm finally getting my hair colored/cut today for the first time since October. I've been too scared to try a German salon. I don't know what to expect... - wish me luck!
GTKY: Disneyland! That place is still so magical to me. My Dad would take us a lot when we had our summers with him (parents are divorced). Looking forward to taking DS to Disneyland Paris since it's only 4.5 hour drive from us, although he's too young to really get to do a whole lot there. It will still be a fun family trip!
@mamaqdubu I am no toddler whisperer either. My son's behavior has gotten kind of nuts too, and we are fighting with getting him to listen all the time. I struggle with being able to tell how much if it is because he can't communicate what he wants to us all the time yet (22 months) and I should give him a "pass" vs. he knows exactly what is going on and is choosing to do differently.
@emiliadkay I grew up pretty close to a community pool and tennis court - it was paradise!
I really also need to learn the TW's. I think it sounds pretty safe between the three of us to let it flow freely, but if others join we'll need to make sure to be sensitive.
As far as the 22 month thing, I was there last year with my first. It took him until about 26-28 months before he was more easily able to communicate his needs (it's SO much easier now, he just doesn't like to listen and is learning a lot more independence). I found Janet Lansbury's podcasts "Unruffled Respectful Parenting" to be incredibly helpful insight into the toddler mind. Specifically for tantrums, I just listened to one recently about the 3 types of tantrums, when to give in to them and when not to. It also is helpful in making me feel not crazy / alone when I'm at my limit!
@emiliadkay Welcome! You're late afternoon summer with ice cream sandwiches on the porch made my heart skip a beat because I totally have similar memories...ahh to be a kid agian.
@CrystalPDX welome! Wow! You're in Germany for quite a long time. I'm also overseas but I'm here permantently and I'm in the UK. I'm aslo very excited to go to Disneyland Paris! Have you been before? We plan on going for my birthday in November. I also agreewith mamaq and would love to hear the different places you've been! Good luck with the hair cut today! Do you have an idea of what you want done?
As for the TW, I am childless but they don't bother me. I think it's just a courtesy thing. Like, you never know who's lurking and all that.
What brings you to WRW? The community and to get things off my chest like the above.
ETA: forgot my rave!
Due: 6 Nov 2021
When do you think you will start TTC? Looking to start in one month... that means one more period and I'm beginning to freak out. My DH laughs that I would think of it this way, but I suppose he's not really affected much until later in pregnancy lol. We are going away early June to celebrate our anniversary and my cycle is lining up that we will try when we are away
What brings you to WRW? Since we've decided to start TTC in June a few months ago, I haven't stopped thinking about it!
Any R/R?
Rant: I've been using a tracking app and just started tracking via OPK Clearblue Digital yesterday. I've been ready for a while but now I'm getting nervous as it is getting closer! Does everyone get cold feet as it gets closer? I'm a bit of a worrier and tend to give myself anxiety over nothing.
Rave: DH and I are heading down the shore this weekend to relax and unwind. My friend has a grooming shop there so our shih tzu mix will get a fresh cut and we will hang on the boardwalk until he is ready to pick up. Things have been a bit hectic with us hosting Easter and doing work on the house... looking forward to doing nothing this weekend!
GTKY: I loved going down the shore to Wildwood in the summer as a kid with my family and eating ice cream for dinner... this little shop had great coconut ice cream. I grew up with an older brother and would always fight at home too, but rarely while we were away!
@mamaqdubu your Iceland trip sounds amazing! Have you traveled while pregnant previously? I'd love to do a babymoon! Also, we are renovating our sunroom too! It sounds like your project is coming along nicely! Have you been working on it long?
@emiliadkay That sounds just like a movie that your house backed up to the community pool... how cool!!
@CrystalPDX I'm jealous of you moving to Germany, that is awesome! I would love to travel Europe! And I totally understand the hesitation of getting your hair done by a new stylist! Fortunately, my step-sister is a stylist, but I'll drive any distance to have an appointment with her lol. Good luck! Let us know how it turns out.
@jackie_dunny That is rough 2 hour bus ride each way, ugh! I used to work in NYC and took the bus and it was roughly 1.5 hours each way.. sometimes more on the way home. The only thing I miss is just vegging out on your own and not worrying about having to pay attention and drive - just listen to an audiobook or watch some netflix. Yay for three day weekend!! Enjoy the BBQ! I haven't had a salmon burger, how are they? I'm picking up some turkey burgers on my lunch break today to bring down the shore this weekend.
I'm not offended and enjoy hearing about your children I do think it is more to be mindful of those who may be lurking as jackie mentioned.
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@mamaqdubu Speaking of podcasts, officially writing down your Janet Lansbury recommendation for future reference. Thank you! Also, yes, multiple BMBs feels like it would be a lot to keep up with. Our BMB seemed divided into two main camps (first time moms and everyone else) for a long time. The whole pregnancy experience was just - understandably - so different. But some things (like amazon flash sales on winkels) cross the divide
@ziggymama06 I think cold feet as you get closer to TTC "for real" is totally normal. Or at least it was my experience as well. I was sooo impatient to start, then felt totally unprepared, and it wasn't until the test came back negative that first month that I knew I was really, truly ready for all this. Next month is officially so soon!
@crystalPDX Disney was my dream when I was little. I ordered their promotional video at age 7 and would watch the VHS on like a weekly basis. Didn't end up going until I was a teenager, but I want my kids to have the childhood memories of the place it sounds like you have!
What brings you to WRW? Comuity and pepole to talk to.
GTKY: What is your most fond family summer memory as a child? (a family tradition, a specific vacation/experience)
Anytime spent with my siblings, I have fond memories of 4th of july or going to the county fair.
@jackie_dunny I haven't been to Disnelyland Paris yet, but we plan to go in October for my bday! Pretty similar to your plans. I hear it's not the same as some of the other parks, but I think it will still be really fun. We've only lived in the states and Germany, but since we moved here we have been to The Netherlands (Holland & Amsterdam), Munich and Cologne. I've been to Venice for work, and have some more work travel coming up to Romania, and Belgium. Trying to cram as much in before we TTC.
Your commute! OMG! I used to commute 45 mins each way and it got so old. I did enjoy having time to read, but my bus was also very crowded and you couldn't always get a seat. The worst is when you have to pee. I sympathize with you big time.
@ziggymama06 - my hair turned it out TERRIBLE. I should post the pics. I wanted my highlights touched up. She did them with a peroxide combination, she didn't use any kind of toner, and her foils were all over the place. She burned my scalp, and portions of my hair completely broke off. I have zebra stripe orange hair with chunky, 1999 highlights. She's giving me a full refund but I have to go stop by to pick it up this week, which I am dreading because I hate confrontational awkward situations like this. And on top of it, there is a cultural barrier so it makes it all the more painful. I'm trying to find someplace else to go to have it corrected but I'm thinking that hair coloring as we know it in the states isn't a thing here? I'm also limited because I have to find someone that speaks English.
@emiliadkay that is so cute you would watch the promo video! I had a Disney Silly Songs VHS - It was just kids running around doing song and dance routines in Disneyland. I think I burnt the VHS up.
@chinadoll2522 congrats to your DH! August will be here before you know it!
@emiliadkay yes, daily commute It's true that DH and I need to appreciate the little things (like sleeping in) as well before LOs come along.
@chinadoll2522 OMG! So excited for you! You have a date/month! Congrats to YH as well on the new job. Hopefully you can start to just relax a little just the two of you in your new house and just enjoy it all now.
@CrystalPDX I've heard the same thing about it not being the same as the other Disney parks which makes me a little nervous for it but it's still Disney so I know I'll love it. Plus, since my expectations are low, I'm sure it'll just make it that much better. OMG! I can't believe about your hair! I agree with @mamaqdubu about asking for some opinions. Is there anyone you work with that could recommend somewhere as well?
Also, I've been on this board since November and I've never seen it so poppin'. Finally!
Due: 6 Nov 2021
@CrystalPDX I'll bet one of the stylist recommendations you got works out and you're amazed how well they put you back together. I hate confrontational situations, too, and I somehow always end up thanking the person who butchered my head and telling them I love it. So props to you for saying something and getting your money back!
As far as signatures...I dunno. It looks like they may still be a thing (I still see references to signature themes/contests in a few places in TTGP) but more often placed in spoilers than they used to be? I need to update mine!
Also @jackie_dunny I never learned how to GIF. when you do it, does it automatically go into a spoiler/hide situation? or do you have to do something special.
I need to learn all the things I guess
@mamaqdubu I always do a quick google search of what I want, copy the image, and then I add a spoiler as always on here and put it in the grey box. If you press the paragraph button (the backwards P) and choose spoiler, it'll come up. I always put it in a spoiler in case it's too big of an image
Due: 6 Nov 2021
Maybe in a year or two
What brings you to WRW?
Passing the time with people like me
Any R/R?
Rant- lately when I mention my baby fever to people with children they say “You can take mine for a while, that should make it go away” but I’ve been working with children of all ages (teaching, nanny, tutor, mentor) for the last 9 years and I love it. If anything it contributes to the want for children. It’s also frustrating because people close to me know that most of my career has involved children so it’s like wtf I love kids?!
Rave- My SO picked up a coffee mug the other day that said “Best Mom” or something of the like and said “Soon this will be for you” it was super validating and comforting that he has BOTB as much as I do. I’ve been doing some diy projects lately and actually finishing some! It’s really gratifying and empowering to make things.
GTKY: I have dreadlocks that I’ve been growing for almost a year. This is the third time I’ve locked my hair and I really like the way they turned out. I’m hoping that I can resist the urge to cut my hair (one of my fave things to do when stressed or excited) so I can have super long hair like all of my hair inspiration on Pinterest.
Any tips on keeping up with replies or comments? I’m having trouble navigating to app and I want to respond to people and not just post about myself.
Due: 6 Nov 2021
*TW kids and loss*
Semi-new, I also used to hang on here a few years ago with @emiliadkay while TTC. With DD1 I was on the Jan 16 BMB, I was briefly on the July 18 BMB but had a loss at 9 weeks. Then went on to be in the Oct 18 BMB with DD2.
When do you think you will start TTC?
We're on the fence about #3 (which is technically #4 since I have a 6yr old SD). DH and I talk about it and go back and forth all the time. I briefly had an IUD (couldn't take the side effects and didn't have it too long) after DD2 was born and when I told DH we were good for 5 years he immediately blurted out "I want another one!". The biggest obstacle for us is paying for daycare, and age... I'll be 37 in July.
What brings you to WRW? My Oct BMB moved to FB and I don't do FB so I'm looking for some support and people to talk to with similar thoughts
Any R/R?
GTKY: What is your most fond family summer memory as a child? (a family tradition, a specific vacation/experience) My parents brought my brother and I to Maine for our first family vacation and now Maine has a special place in my heart. We've only been on a couple family vacations since my parents didn't have much for disposable income, so I think that makes me appreciate it even more
@xwhyandz People saying that to you is super annoying, I'm not a kid person at all and it's so different when it's your own!
@CrystalPDX Sorry about your hair! I've been thinking about trying a new salon closer to my home since my current one is amazing but about a 30 min drive without traffic and reading about your hair is cementing the decision to just still with my current one!
edit bc I guess I forgot how to tag!
@CrystalPDX I’ve had a few hair dressers and have been let down by all of them in the long run, I hope your hair is back to the way you love soon.
@jackie_dunny thanks for the tip, it’s deff becoming a part of my routine to check in, after all how else will I tend this baby fever lol
Exciting news though! I’ve been doing a lot of meditation and focusing on how to be more present in life so that I can be happier now instead of waiting to be happy in the future. For now that might mean putting college on hold, which was causing me a minor identity crisis because of the peer pressure/ societal expectation to just do it even if it sucks. I’m already working in my dream career and I’m thinking of getting certified to be a doula, so I’m finally starting to make peace with life taking a different route. All that being said, I’ve been sharing these ideas with my SO and now we’re talking about ttc as soon as I get my IUD removed which is much sooner than I anticipated as I was planning to just get more birth control. As soon as we finished talking I was like “ I have to update the group!” I’m really excited that it looks like my wait is getting shorter
@KFrob nice to meet you! I’m in the same boat going back and forth about #3. I finally just made an appt in July to get my IUD removed and we will either go for it or decide not to. I needed to give myself a deadline.
Due: 6 Nov 2021
When do you think you will start TTC? DH wants to stat, but I’m feeling wishy washy. Sometimes I think we should just go for it because I don’t want to regret not having another. Other times, I feel like our family is in a good place right now and am nervous about shaking things up.
What brings you to WRW? The desire to connect with women who may be in similar situations.
GTKY: What is your most fond family summer memory as a child? (a family tradition, a specific vacation/experience) I really don’t have one... my family is nuts and I have successfully blocked out most of my childhood.
I am so late in the game here with the May WRW that I don’t feel like I could possibly comment on all of the news being shared (you all are so, so good at reading several comments at once and giving thoughtful responses)... but just wanted to say that I’m excited for @xwhyandz the TTC update is obviously exciting, but so is all of the other life stuff! Feeling like you are free to be who you are and don’t have to fit into anybody else’s idea of who you should be is exciting stuff.
@mamaqdubu and @kfrob I am also trying to decide on #3. It isn’t easy. I have a 3.5 year old and a 24 month old. And things are just starting to mellow out, but I don’t want a huge age gap either so, I feel like I have to zig or zag in the next month or so.
@x@xwhyandz I think for some reason my brain processed it as Oct 2019 so I was like, whoa! She's leaving a lot sooner than we thought!
Due: 6 Nov 2021
@mamaqdubu please! I would be posting on that bad boy everyday. I also don’t want to discuss it with those that I am close with.
What brings you to WRW? I’m sure a new one of these is going to happen next week, but I wanted to pop in here and say hi as well.
Any R/R?
eh? I could devote an entire novel into a rant about my 3y/o, but I will refrain... Emotions are rough man!
Have y’all tried the Reese’s peanut butter and chocolate shake at steak and shake? That’s an amazing shake
GTKY: What is your most fond family summer memory as a child? We went to WDW a lot growing up. My parents met each other working there and my grandparents both retired from there, so it’s pretty much in my blood. We now are annual pass holders and it’s pretty awesome to be able to experience “Disney Magic” through their eyes.
Due: 6 Nov 2021
Nice to meet you @doodleoodle and @ivyvines6 and see you all next week for a new WRW!
Due: 6 Nov 2021
i missed you guys and I’m excited to see so many updates. I know I’m a month behind but I just wanted to reply here since this is where it all started for me
I would love to invest in a Disney pass, I’ve actually never been. I’m glad we figured out the dates thing. Also, grateful to be in this community because the rules as you progress on your journey get really intense imo. I’m going to read the June wrw and chime in on July when it posts! Hope everyone has a great day!