August 2019 Moms

Weekly Questions 4/29

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Re: Weekly Questions 4/29

  • @Allycat11 My plan is to have tubes tied at a minimum (removed if blood vessels are not too engorged). The removal reduces the risk of ovarian cancer later in life. I’m 1000% sure this is my last, so I like the finality of it and will do anything to avoid being on hormonal birth control again. I’m also a repeat c-section, so it’s kind of a no brainer since it won’t add to recovery time. 
  • @Allycat11 - Like @thirdtimesacharm2019 stated, if we do decide we are *definitely* done between now and then, I would opt to get my tubes removed. Everything I've heard is tying of tubes can lead to some heavier bleeding and cramps for long after the procedure is completed. Just another thing to consider.
    **History in Spoiler**
    Me-35, DH-36 - TTC since 08/10
    Me - anovulatory, non-Insulin PCOS, DH - low end of "normal" sperm count
       IUI#1   - 02/15 - Cancelled due to scrubbed sperm count <1MM
       IVF#1  - 08/15 - 13x5-day blastocysts (ranging from AA-BB, most are 5 or 6), not PGS, on ice
       FET#1 - 10/15 - 1 emb - BFP (DD 07/16) (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#2 - 07/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#3 - 08/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#4 - 10/17 - 2 emb - BFN (changed to estrace + prometrium because of allergic reaction to PIO sesame oil)
    ERA Testing - 12/17 - window moved (-1 day)
       FET#5 - 03/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
    Karyotype Testing - 04/18 - Negative (we're ok)
       FET#6 - 06/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#7 - 10/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#8 - 11/18 - 2 emb - BFP; looks like one baby is going to make it, DD is due 8/16 (though likely to be 8/9)


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  • Thank you all for the feedback on what you would do, I definitely am going to do a ton of research. The plan has always been for DH to have a vasectomy because I do not like being on birth control and hate condoms. Today the doctor caught me off guard when she asked. We also have spent our entire marriage TTC or raising babies so it is really really hard for me to grasp that we are planning to be done after this one. None of my siblings have started having kids yet so I think it will be even harder when that day comes. 
    11/2010 Diagnosed with PCOS 
    10/31/11 M/C at 9 weeks
    1/12/13 DD was born
    4/9/16 DS was born 
    9/17 CP 
    6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19 

  • DH will likely be getting a vasectomy - his one attempt at BC for the 15 years we have been together 😂
    BabyFruit Ticker}
  • jrm_14jrm_14 member
    @avrilmai I think we will also be trapped spending Mother’s Day w/ at least MIL. I’m pretty sure 4 of 5 have been with her. However, I’m also holding out hope next year is our own celebration as a family of 3. 
  • @allycat11 if I end up needing a csection I'll get my tubes tied. If I have another vaginal delivery DH will get a vasectomy. We thought, and planned to be done after #3. But it never felt quite right to me. I even made a consultation and an actual appoinntment for a tubal. And I backed out like three days prior. This time we are really really sure it's the last. I would say if you aren't 100% sure then don't do it. It's a big decision and you don't have to make it right now 
  • @Allycat11, I wouldn’t do it. My reason is so morbid but I’d want to make sure everything is fine with baby before deciding to be permanently done. 

    Ive also heard of side effects from a tubal (heavier periods, fibroids). But of course this doesn’t impact everyone. 

    *Live, Love, Laugh, Learn*

  • @AKuzReve I said the same thing last night! I told DH that I sound like a terrible person but God forbid if something were to happen to that baby in the first year or so I think I would have another. I did a bunch of research on tying tubes or removing them last night and it doesn't seem like the right option for me. Back to the plan of DH getting a vasectomy. 
    11/2010 Diagnosed with PCOS 
    10/31/11 M/C at 9 weeks
    1/12/13 DD was born
    4/9/16 DS was born 
    9/17 CP 
    6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19 

  • @AKuzReve along the lines of morbidity, I'm having DH wait until this baby is about 6 months old before he gets fixed. 

    We'll be pretty sexless until then! 
    DD1 5/23/14, DD2 12/5/16   Baby #3 on the way!


  • I've definitely ruled out ligation for those reasons (painful, heavy periods, etc). I'm either going to get my tubes removed during my c-section or give us a small window to TTC (with zero expectations, given my two angels are IVF babies - and hard-fought ones, at that), where DH will get a vasectomy. I do plan on having a partial anyway, given my proclivity for uterine polyps. I'm just going to wait a few years and plan for it to coincide with a breast reduction+lift. If the planets align and we do get #3, then I'll have them take my tubes at that time.
    **History in Spoiler**
    Me-35, DH-36 - TTC since 08/10
    Me - anovulatory, non-Insulin PCOS, DH - low end of "normal" sperm count
       IUI#1   - 02/15 - Cancelled due to scrubbed sperm count <1MM
       IVF#1  - 08/15 - 13x5-day blastocysts (ranging from AA-BB, most are 5 or 6), not PGS, on ice
       FET#1 - 10/15 - 1 emb - BFP (DD 07/16) (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#2 - 07/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#3 - 08/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#4 - 10/17 - 2 emb - BFN (changed to estrace + prometrium because of allergic reaction to PIO sesame oil)
    ERA Testing - 12/17 - window moved (-1 day)
       FET#5 - 03/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
    Karyotype Testing - 04/18 - Negative (we're ok)
       FET#6 - 06/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#7 - 10/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#8 - 11/18 - 2 emb - BFP; looks like one baby is going to make it, DD is due 8/16 (though likely to be 8/9)


  • DH is adamant we will only have 2. And that as soon as the second is old enough, he's getting snipped. I told him that's not how it works, and we have to have a discussion after #2 to make sure we are both done. THEN he can get fixed lol
  • I want 2 kids so if we’re fortunate enough to have our other embryo implant too, then I’ll have my tubes removed shortly after her birth.  If the transfer doesn’t work, I don’t know how long I’d wait before having them removed but I know I couldn’t mentally handle too long.  *TW* the paranoia after my ectopic was insane and that’s with all the IVF monitoring.  I don’t know how I would handle the paranoia without it**end TW**
  • When we are done, DH volunteered to get snipped. He said I have to have the babies, he can be in charge of not having the babies. LOL. But, we will wait probably at least a year after our last is born, just to be sure. I know several couples who got snipped too soon and then got it reversed to have another. 
    Rainbow baby Dean is due 2/17/17!
  • I agree with @olivemomma; you just never know!! And @WinchesterGirl - definitely him and definitely sometime around that 1 year mark. I still go back and forth, but am pretty sure I want to leave the (remote) possibility out there for a third, buuuuut I'm also sticking to my "no wiping butts after 40" so we'd have to be really lucky and it happen really fast.

    *TW* even with the loss of one of the twins this time, I immediately felt the need to want a third - but it's going to be up to the Universe this time - we're out of embryos and I'd rather go through a thousand labors than go through another round of IVF, those who do multiple rounds are truly superheroes! *TW end*
    **History in Spoiler**
    Me-35, DH-36 - TTC since 08/10
    Me - anovulatory, non-Insulin PCOS, DH - low end of "normal" sperm count
       IUI#1   - 02/15 - Cancelled due to scrubbed sperm count <1MM
       IVF#1  - 08/15 - 13x5-day blastocysts (ranging from AA-BB, most are 5 or 6), not PGS, on ice
       FET#1 - 10/15 - 1 emb - BFP (DD 07/16) (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#2 - 07/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#3 - 08/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#4 - 10/17 - 2 emb - BFN (changed to estrace + prometrium because of allergic reaction to PIO sesame oil)
    ERA Testing - 12/17 - window moved (-1 day)
       FET#5 - 03/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
    Karyotype Testing - 04/18 - Negative (we're ok)
       FET#6 - 06/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#7 - 10/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#8 - 11/18 - 2 emb - BFP; looks like one baby is going to make it, DD is due 8/16 (though likely to be 8/9)


  • When we found out about this bonus baby, I teased DH that my Christmas gift for him was a vasectomy. I have absolutely no desire to go on BC. He's game, we've just been waiting to make sure all is well with this baby to schedule things....
    *TW*
    TTC 1/2012
    Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
    6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
    TTC #3 5/2016
    Restarted Fertility tx
    IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17

  • @olivemama exactly! That is what I keep telling him. For all we know, after 2, I will be the one who is done, and HE will be the one wanting more 😂. It's a convo that needs to happen after we get to that point. We are still working on giving birth to the first one....cross the snipping bridge when we get to it....
    (That being said, this pregnancy has been so tough and such a rollercoaster, and so expensive and painful already, that it's totally feasible that  I won't want to do it more than once more. But also possible I will forget aaaaaall the difficulties as soon as I hold this tiny little human of mine!)
  • @chillycanadian You will forget the bad parts, not completely and not right away, but the good will start to outweigh the bad. It’s how nature tricks us into having more babies!
  • I agree with @thirdtimesacharm2019; once that sweet baby hits the sweet spot around 6 months, it is entirely likely you may catch the fever again. It's amazing what the mind/body forget.
    **History in Spoiler**
    Me-35, DH-36 - TTC since 08/10
    Me - anovulatory, non-Insulin PCOS, DH - low end of "normal" sperm count
       IUI#1   - 02/15 - Cancelled due to scrubbed sperm count <1MM
       IVF#1  - 08/15 - 13x5-day blastocysts (ranging from AA-BB, most are 5 or 6), not PGS, on ice
       FET#1 - 10/15 - 1 emb - BFP (DD 07/16) (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#2 - 07/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#3 - 08/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#4 - 10/17 - 2 emb - BFN (changed to estrace + prometrium because of allergic reaction to PIO sesame oil)
    ERA Testing - 12/17 - window moved (-1 day)
       FET#5 - 03/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
    Karyotype Testing - 04/18 - Negative (we're ok)
       FET#6 - 06/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#7 - 10/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#8 - 11/18 - 2 emb - BFP; looks like one baby is going to make it, DD is due 8/16 (though likely to be 8/9)


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