@emeraldduchess I'm so sorry you had a rough week. Re: puppy name... I told my husband to come up with some puppy name ideas after he shot mine down, and he has shockingly come up with zero ideas of his own. So I'll just wait until we pick her up and name her what I want. I really like the name Dahlia. It's pretty, and there was a pup named Dahlia at the humane society I volunteer at who I fell in love with. I would have adopted her if I didn't already have a dog at the time.
**TW**
Me: 35 | H: 40 Married Sept. 2013 DS1: Nov 11, 2016 MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d) CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d) BFP! 8/24/19 DS2: May 10, 2020
@marebear15 I am so sorry you had to deal with that girl. To claim a miscarriage like that and then complain/broadcast it for attention...I have no words. So many hugs to you. 💚 @kagesstarshroom that's wonderful that your friend has been so supportive of you. I have thought about seeing a counselor but convincing DH is hard. He doesn't like the idea of a third party knowing all our emotional business. Plus he has a phobia of doctors/medical professionals in general. (I am sure that all my venting about him has you guys thinking he's a big jerk. He's not, it's been a very emotional journey for both of us and we both have very different ways of dealing with anger and sadness. ) Edit: apparently I can't spell today...
@marebear15 I cannot believe some people, that story is insane. Just seeking attention for what, one of the saddest moments in someone's life? Sorry you had to deal with that and good for you for holding it together!
Appointment update: my doctor has decided to refer me to a leading fertility doctor based in toronto. The wait time will take a minimum of 3 months so my dr figures it's best to get a head start on this. Also this doctor's main focus is just on repeated loss within his clinic and though in general it is classified as 3 repeated losses, he will accept once it's 2 losses. Happy that my doctor was proactive on this since I did not expect that, she said that no matter what situation I am in when they call me, it would only do good.
@c1kc1kpol1cn1kIn one of the books I read, it said that 2 confirmed losses is becoming more prevalent rather than 3, (thought it specified they had to be, um... oo I forget the language, but they had to be confirmed via ultrasound). Anyway, so I'm glad the Dr. there is seeing you after 2. I would hope that means he is on top of his current research, etc.!
@emeraldduchessI don't want to get too involved in any decision about seeing or not seeing someone to talk about this stuff w/ bc it's not my place, but I will say if you think counseling will help you, you should see someone. There is, like, dr/patient confidentiality, so your therapist/counselor is sort of like--part of YOU rather than a separate person? Is that a good argument? Haha. Just trying to help in case now or in the future you feel strongly enough about it to bring it up with him again. I also understand though how it feels to have a super loving awesome DH who you vent about to the point that ppl might throw up some question marks about your marriage lol and you're like "nono, most of the time we are totally on the same page and everything is great, i just need to get these things that don't happen as often off my chest!"
<Cross-posted in the IF thread too> Hey friends, I said I’d come back for tags but couldn’t, I’m sorry. I’ve lost my place after being mostly offline for 2 days & could only lurk/lovetit. Anyway, I read this really interesting article and thought it might be of interest to some of you. It’s about the impact/difference between Folic acid (man-made, has to be broken down through a methylation process before it can be absorbed, not everyone’s bodies can do this) and Folate (occurs naturally in foods, easily absorbed, & can be bought in special pre-methylated prenatals/Folate pills). The only issue I saw w the article is that they use the two words interchangeably, which is common & unfortunate.
TL;DR “Studies have shown that some cases of prematureovarianfailure may be due to abnormal methylation, and patients should be evaluated not only with an Anti-Müllerian hormone level and ultrasound, but for MTHFR mutations as well. The MTHFR SNPs induce strong chromosomal anomalies as early as the preimplantation stages of development [7]. Hypomethylation during trophoblastic development due to this defective enzyme is another reason believed to contribute to recurrentearlyfetalloss [2]. Male partners should also be tested for MTHFR, as this mutation can affect not only sperm morphology and DNA quality but contribute to oligo-asthenospermia. In our Georgia centre, 22 patients with recurrent miscarriages, failed IUI and/or IVF attempts were noted and tested for MTHFR mutations. They tested positive, either homozygous or heterozygous for the MTHFR mutations, and were started on 800mcg QD of 5-methyl THF [folate]. Upon follow up, 100% of these patients conceived successfully, many within only 2-3 months of starting the supplement. Another study out of France looked at 30 couples with infertility lasting 3-5 years, where at least one member was a carrier of one main isoforms (C677T and A1298C [MTHFR mutations]), who were treated with 500-800mcg QD of 5-methyl THF [folate] for 2-4 months. Of this group, 12 conceived spontaneously and 15 others with the help of assisted reproductive therapy, with the remaining still under treatment [8].”
I belong to a few groups on FB that focus on MTHFR & lesser-known blood-clotting disorders, hidden infections, & reproductive immunology. I’ve learned so much, it’s helped me immensely. Please please message me if you want to learn more. (Nothing is being sold in any of these groups—just in case this sounds like a bait & switch!) I just want to help.
Saw a piece on pregnancy loss on the today show this morning. Nice to see major news outlets talking about it and hopefully helping to normalize it a little.
@keikilove Thanks for sharing this article! The book It Starts With the Egg I read does a whole thing on the difference between the two. The prenatals I bought that just came today have folate, but since the ones I bought before I read that part of the book didn't, I've been taking a folate supplement with them.
Just got another *brand new* bill from my d&c for anesthesiology, not to mention the others sitting on my desk unpaid from my ob, labs, & surgery hospital bc emotions, but guess I'm gonna have to get on top of this on Monday now that it's 4 bills, 3 overdue. UGHhhhhh. I know I should have done this sooner, but I just....didn't. Really not happy about this. So much money for.... pain, anger, grief, blah & how the bills just stupidly bring all that back & make me regret, like, trying again bc what if all this for just grief expenditure again. I'll be okay, but really not happy about my own financial misery and stupidity and the way these bills just poke at all that.
Re: TTCAL w/o 4/1
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@kagesstarshroom that's wonderful that your friend has been so supportive of you. I have thought about seeing a counselor but convincing DH is hard. He doesn't like the idea of a third party knowing all our emotional business. Plus he has a phobia of doctors/medical professionals in general. (I am sure that all my venting about him has you guys thinking he's a big jerk. He's not, it's been a very emotional journey for both of us and we both have very different ways of dealing with anger and sadness. )
Edit: apparently I can't spell today...
Also still waiting on hcg etc.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@emeraldduchessI don't want to get too involved in any decision about seeing or not seeing someone to talk about this stuff w/ bc it's not my place, but I will say if you think counseling will help you, you should see someone. There is, like, dr/patient confidentiality, so your therapist/counselor is sort of like--part of YOU rather than a separate person? Is that a good argument? Haha. Just trying to help in case now or in the future you feel strongly enough about it to bring it up with him again. I also understand though how it feels to have a super loving awesome DH who you vent about to the point that ppl might throw up some question marks about your marriage lol and you're like "nono, most of the time we are totally on the same page and everything is great, i just need to get these things that don't happen as often off my chest!"
https://www.oatext.com/the-hazards-of-excessive-folic-acid-intake-in-mthfr-gene-mutation-carriers-an-obstetric-and-gynecological-perspective.php
TL;DR “Studies have shown that some cases of premature ovarian failure may be due to abnormal methylation, and patients should be evaluated not only with an Anti-Müllerian hormone level and ultrasound, but for MTHFR mutations as well. The MTHFR SNPs induce strong chromosomal anomalies as early as the preimplantation stages of development [7]. Hypomethylation during trophoblastic development due to this defective enzyme is another reason believed to contribute to recurrent early fetal loss [2]. Male partners should also be tested for MTHFR, as this mutation can affect not only sperm morphology and DNA quality but contribute to oligo-asthenospermia. In our Georgia centre, 22 patients with recurrent miscarriages, failed IUI and/or IVF attempts were noted and tested for MTHFR mutations. They tested positive, either homozygous or heterozygous for the MTHFR mutations, and were started on 800mcg QD of 5-methyl THF [folate]. Upon follow up, 100% of these patients conceived successfully, many within only 2-3 months of starting the supplement. Another study out of France looked at 30 couples with infertility lasting 3-5 years, where at least one member was a carrier of one main isoforms (C677T and A1298C [MTHFR mutations]), who were treated with 500-800mcg QD of 5-methyl THF [folate] for 2-4 months. Of this group, 12 conceived spontaneously and 15 others with the help of assisted reproductive therapy, with the remaining still under treatment [8].”
I belong to a few groups on FB that focus on MTHFR & lesser-known blood-clotting disorders, hidden infections, & reproductive immunology. I’ve learned so much, it’s helped me immensely. Please please message me if you want to learn more. (Nothing is being sold in any of these groups—just in case this sounds like a bait & switch!) I just want to help.
@keikilove Thanks for sharing this article! The book It Starts With the Egg I read does a whole thing on the difference between the two. The prenatals I bought that just came today have folate, but since the ones I bought before I read that part of the book didn't, I've been taking a folate supplement with them.