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July 2019 Moms
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GTKY 3/6: Crazy Co-Worker Edition
hestia-is-wearie
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Stolen from @nomangos23 September '19. Tell us about the craziest boss, current coworker, or former coworker you've ever had!
I couldn't resist stealing this because I got an update today from an old coworker I'm going to refer to as The Oaf. We were the same age and worked in similar functions for a few years, then when my new boss started, she reworked our positions so we'd have the same job title and duties. I knew it was going to be bad before we even started. On our first phone call together to a customer, The Oaf needlessly gave verbal instructions over my shoulder ("Now, you click on that." "I know."), rephrased my statements as "What she means is..." ("That's exactly what I said," I replied), and laughed his head off when I asked the customer a question. I told our boss what happened but explained I didn't think he was trying to be sexist--he really was that clueless. He was studying for a business analytics MBA but couldn't calculate a rate of change formula, so his report showed that our customer's sales decreased by 400%, or down to 0 and into the negatives four times over. (It was actually more like an 18% decrease.) His excuse was "Well, no one ever taught me that." My boss and I had to proofread nine drafts of his report before it was complete...and then my boss asked him where the prior month report was. He hadn't started it at all because he'd put it off for six weeks. The worst was when the three of us went on a business trip together: we sat at dinner and I mentioned that my pre-DH college crush was blind, to which The Oaf said, "Ooo, scandalous!" (Uh, what is so "scandalous" about being attracted to someone with a disability?) Then he piped in with how "most of the girls he dated in college were virgins" but "only did the deed with one of them." Somehow my boss changed the subject to potato chips.
The Oaf found a new job about a month after we got back from that trip/the six-weeks-late report incident. There were even more gaffes going around that I knew he was trying to escape before he got fired. I checked his LinkedIn today just to see how he was doing and it shows he is not working anywhere right now. He didn't even last nine months at the new place that he moved all the way across the country for. Petty, yes, but I am definitely basking in schadenfreude over here.
I couldn't resist stealing this because I got an update today from an old coworker I'm going to refer to as The Oaf. We were the same age and worked in similar functions for a few years, then when my new boss started, she reworked our positions so we'd have the same job title and duties. I knew it was going to be bad before we even started. On our first phone call together to a customer, The Oaf needlessly gave verbal instructions over my shoulder ("Now, you click on that." "I know."), rephrased my statements as "What she means is..." ("That's exactly what I said," I replied), and laughed his head off when I asked the customer a question. I told our boss what happened but explained I didn't think he was trying to be sexist--he really was that clueless. He was studying for a business analytics MBA but couldn't calculate a rate of change formula, so his report showed that our customer's sales decreased by 400%, or down to 0 and into the negatives four times over. (It was actually more like an 18% decrease.) His excuse was "Well, no one ever taught me that." My boss and I had to proofread nine drafts of his report before it was complete...and then my boss asked him where the prior month report was. He hadn't started it at all because he'd put it off for six weeks. The worst was when the three of us went on a business trip together: we sat at dinner and I mentioned that my pre-DH college crush was blind, to which The Oaf said, "Ooo, scandalous!" (Uh, what is so "scandalous" about being attracted to someone with a disability?) Then he piped in with how "most of the girls he dated in college were virgins" but "only did the deed with one of them." Somehow my boss changed the subject to potato chips.
The Oaf found a new job about a month after we got back from that trip/the six-weeks-late report incident. There were even more gaffes going around that I knew he was trying to escape before he got fired. I checked his LinkedIn today just to see how he was doing and it shows he is not working anywhere right now. He didn't even last nine months at the new place that he moved all the way across the country for. Petty, yes, but I am definitely basking in schadenfreude over here.
Re: GTKY 3/6: Crazy Co-Worker Edition
One of my first jobs in high school, there was an older pizza delivery guy that would take pictures of my butt while I was on the line. My boyfriend (now husband) worked there with me.... he was not happy when he caught him doing it red handed.
The same place from above (pizza place) a new manager came in. He acted like he was above all. His wife didn’t have a job and apparently they didn’t have a house either. He would flirt with everyone in there and talk mad crap about his own wife. Turns out, his wife stayed in the car every. Single. Day. With their dog while he was working. He kept saying that they are broke because she took all of his money and gambled it so now living in the car & staying there all day is her punishment.
Also had a guy at the pizza place try to pull moves on me in the walk in freezer. And again, my boyfriend (now husband) worked there too.
Also, tons of delievery drivers instead of getting tipped will get invited inside to smoke a bowl or blunt then return back to work.
If you want crazy coworker stories. Work at a pizza place. 😂 that’s where most of my crazy coworkers are from.
This is same engineer referred a friend to our division. This engineer isn’t producing. My boss has tasked me to evaluating him on one of the systems I specialize in. I have tested him 3 times and he has failed each time. He’s been with us for 8 months and this is the system he’s supposed to specialize in!
so basically they both are getting canned within the next 3 weeks and I’ve been tasked in evaluating and documenting.
@bartonolivia I totally believe that pizza carriers get asked to smoke pot with their customers. I worked at a Subway and my coworkers used to smoke bowls in their cars on slow nights.
@mama_bear19 o_0 ...on purpose?!
It was a lovely email calling me a "know-it-all". It was not the nicest email. The worst part was that she didn't own up to it and tried to play it off like it was about someone else. But it was right after I had told her off for something. My biggest pet peeve is not owning up to your mistakes. It is an absolute lack of honesty and integrity and that is everything to me.
My situation is interesting because I write process and document policy. A big part of my job is working with people to identify where they are not following a process, so I often have to work with managers to follow up on issues they have with their staff. It can be really hard. It just brings all the crazy out of the woodwork.
We had one lady who literally sat on a call with myself and the Process Manager, where we were trying to help her with a systems change. (She was the only one who needed one on one assistance with the system change, it was an upgrade to the UI on Salesforce, so not really a change.) And she literally says, "I just don't do change. I still use the computer I bought 13 years ago because I don't want to learn a new system." And I was so shocked because I couldn't believe she would say that while she was on the call with us. She didn't last much longer. But not because of us.
Once my husband recovered from his injuries and surgery, I just walked out one day.
Two incidents happened in the course of a month. The first incident, I worked over 50 hours in a week (from Mon-Thurs) when my boss was on PTO. I left at 12 pm on Friday for my engagement photos. She made me take a 1/2 day PTO, even though my boss had approved the schedule change.
Then a few weeks later she came into my department freaking out that a civil rights group was going to sue us because one of our current clients had a case open with them. The case had nothing to do with us. She started demanding I work insane hours and send all paperwork to her. I googled the group. They were doing great work. They had an opening. I applied. Now I work for them.