Birth. Birthing-day. B-day, if you will. It is in all of our futures!
This is a safe place to share your past birthing stories, if you'd like to share with the group. It can be helpful and enlightening to read other's experiences with birth, no matter how many times you done this whole pregnancy thing.
As a courtesy to all of the mamas of varying backgrounds here, PLEASE be considerate and put a *Trigger Warning* on your story if warranted. We are all coming to this thread from different places in life and past experience, and this allows mamas who may have had difficult birth histories of their own or anxiety to not read stories that would be difficult for them.
That being said, please come and share. We love birth stories of all kinds - unmedicated, medicated, c-sections, home births... come one, come all!
Re: Birth Stories GTKY
*TW* I was induced at 39+3 because my blood pressure had risen a ton in the last week and it was turning to pre-e. Started with cervidil then pitocin. After 30 hours my water broke on its own and 2 hours later I got the epidural. Went from 2cm (after 30 hours) to 10 over the next 10 hours. In that time, they gave me some pain killers that made me feel like I was dying. I even told DH not to let me fall asleep because I didn't think I'd wake up. The nurse said I was just high and to enjoy it. Hint: I wasn't high. An hour after i got to 10cm, they had me start pushing. *Super TW part* I pushed for 45 minutes before my heart stopped, and the baby's heart stopped. DH said they pushed the baby back in (she was crowning) as they wheeled me to the OR. He wasn't allowed in for the birth or about 8 minutes after while they did CPR and shocked me. *End super TW* next thing I remember was apologizing to DH for not being successful. He gave me a kiss, the doctor held the baby up, then DH and the baby went to the nicu to be evaluated. 2 hours later we were reunited. All in all, labor was about 42 hours then the c section.
Second baby was a planned c section. Showed up at 4am, wheeled to OR at 7am, baby born at 721am. I had pretty major issues with the pitocin after the c section and had the shakes so bad that I wasn't comfortable holding the baby for a few hours. But beyond that, it was calm and smooth. DH was in the room and definitely appreciated the trauma of a c section after he saw it and never once brushed off the pain afterwards (he had done some of that after number 1). Recovery was harder than the first for some reason, but it wasn't terrible.
*TW* when evaluating whether or not to get pregnant again, my cardiac specialist looked over my records and said it's likely the reason I had such a hard time with the first one is that I am not supposed to have pitocin or the pain killer they gave me because it can cause cardiac arrest in people with my condition. We just didn't know. The shorter amount of pitocin after the second kid wasn't good for me, but since it was such a short duration (compared to the first time) that it didn't affect my heart too much. But I need to avoid it at all costs this time, which my MFM is fully aware of. I had some PTSD after DD1 was born, but my heart stopped so that's kinda to be expected. DH also struggled for a while letting me out of his sight. I don't think he even allowed me to shower without him in the bathroom for the first month he was so scared. *End TW*
Sorry to be such a bummer!
When I was 39w4d pregnant with DD I started experiencing extreme pain in my back, I could not time it though and there was nothing in the front so I waited it out. DH came home from work at 10 and right then our entire city lost power so we decided to go for a drive. The pain kept getting more intense but still not timeable and all in my back so we decided to head to the hospital just in case. I spent a few hours hooked up to monitors and they were contractions (all back labor) but 5-7 minutes apart so I was sent home. We headed to bed around 5 am to hopefully get some rest and the contractions stopped.
I woke up at 11 a.m. and stood up to go to the bathroom. Immediately I felt a gush and knew my water broke. Oddly enough my contractions were gone so I woke up DH, called family, took a shower and then we headed to Jimmy John's where we ate inside the restaurant...shout out to some heavy duty pads. At a little after 1 we casually walked into the hospital, still no contractions. They confirmed my water broke and started pitocin to get contractions going. I was given the chance to get an epidural then or wait and because of my fear of pitocin I went for it right away. It took many many hours for me to go from 2cm to 5 cm, somewhere in there my epidural failed and they needed to do it again.
Thankfully I went from 5cm to 10cm very quickly. Oddly though DD was not dropping, she was high in the birth canal and I had no urge to push. At 11:30 p.m. I was determined to get her out so I decided to start pushing. After 2 hours of hard pushing I was struggling to get her out (and MIL who was NOT welcome kept making comments about how all of SILs babies were out after a few pushes). Somewhere in there my epidural wore off or was turned off so I felt everything. *start TW* When I was finally getting close the doctors and nurses got very serious and told me I needed to stop pushing, we knew something was not right but the team did a grest job keeping everyone calm. Some manuevers were done and we had her out not long after at 1:41 a.m. They quickly cut the cord and wisked her off for vitals. I later found out she had shoulder dystocia, the cord was around her neck and she was sunny side up. They had the OR prepped and ready for us but thankfully got her out safely without a csection. *End TW*
***Feel good DS birth story***
At 2:30 a.m. when I was 39w0d I woke up with extreme pain in my abdomen, oh hey that is what a normal contraction feels like! I walked to the bathroom and felt the familiar gush, so I knew my water broke. This time was different though, my contractions were already 2-3 minutes apart. I quickly slapped DH awake and said we need to go NOW! During the 45 minutes it took for his dad to get to our house (Dh forgot to call him at first then had to deal with a freak ice storm in April), I was dealing with constant contractions along with vomiting, that part sucked. No desire to eat this time.
We got to the hospital around 3:30 or 4 and despite my plan to hold off for as long as possible on the epidural I said I wanted one asap. Crappy small town hospital had to call in an anesthesiologist in the middle of the night to do it. It worked perfectly and I was able to rest for an hour or so. A little after 7 when the day nurse came in she checked me and said, okay time to push. I was annoyed because I did not feel the need to push yet and given my previous labor I did not want to waste all of that enegy. DS was born in 5 pushes at 7:37 a.m and honestly I totally half assed the first couple pushes. We were able to delay the cord clamping and do immediate skin to skin and nursing. The OB who delivered DS had been pushing me to have a c-section since first tri given DDs birth story. She even kept telling me he would be 10lbs and there was no way I could deliver vaginally. I was really happy that I stuck to my guns and delivered my perfect 8lb0oz beautiful baby boy with no issue whatsoever.
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
Fast forward six years and DS2 was scheduled C-section for 39 weeks. I had the option for VBAC, but since my first delivery was such a breeze, why tempt fate? This child was on his own program (still is) and I went into labor at 36w4d. After slow progression to around three centimeters I delivered by non-emergency C-section at 36w6d. He was 9lb 4oz, so it’s highly likely the dating was a little off. Due to fluid in his lungs he went straight to the special care nursery and stayed for five days.
I had to get out of bed and into a wheelchair to see my baby. With DS1 I didn’t get out bed until the next day. Three days later I went home without my baby. At least it was only for two days, some babies stay much longer.
Baby #3 will be a scheduled C-section unless it has other plans like #2. I know some people are horrified of C-sections, but honestly it wasn’t that bad in a non-emergency situation. Pushing another human through my hoohaa sounds like a horror story if you ask me.
Takeaway #1: If you have a C-section get up and move as early as the doctor will let you. It makes for an easier recovery.
Takeaway #2: Even planned births don’t go as planned, so be flexible and enjoy the moment.
I was 4 days passed my due date and my contractions started just after 1 am. I decided to go down to the couch after about an hour so that DH could sleep (spoiler, he didn’t). At about 10 am we decided to head to the hospital since I had been at 4-1-1.
When we got to the triage, they assessed me and I was barely dilated so they decided to send me home. I had no intention of actually going home because if it wasn’t then, how would I know when it was time and I didn’t want to be far away. So I was going to just go down to the cafeteria. But, as soon as I stood up, my water broke. They must have accidentally punctured it during the exam. So at that point they had to admit me. The nurse let me eat lunch first, which was really nice.
They started me on pitocin since I was on the 24 hour clock and only about 2cm. I asked for the epidural too early, and they convinced me to go with a morphine first, which was a mistake. I’d only taken codeine before, but I did not do well on it, but I thought it’d be different, it wasn’t. I instantly felt like I had one too many drinks and should have gone home 2 hours earlier. I immediately said that I didn’t want anymore of that. I got really nauseous and was throwing up and couldn’t stay awake. After sleeping for hours, I finally sobered up enough that I got the epidural. I also slept with that.
I pretty much slept through my entire labor. They woke me up at 10:30 pm to check me and I was fully dilated. They told me to let them know when I felt the need to push. At 11 I told them I did, but I didn’t, I just felt like I could keep sleeping forever and I wanted to move on the next phase. The doctor had gone home to sleep so we had to wait for him to come back, which pretty much determined my daughters birthday as the 19th over the 18th.
At just passed midnight the doctor had arrived and they let me push. I pushed for 40 minutes and then she came out in one push. I didn’t even know she was out, I asked if I should push again. But there she was. Tiny thing at 19 inches and 6 pounds 9 oz. I did “rip a bit”, they didn’t tell me how much, apparently that’s something people are usually told.
ETA: we were able to do delayed clamping and immediate skin to skin
We did have some problems afterwards where I wasn’t producing enough breastmilk, which caused her not to poop out the meconium enough and led her to being jaundice and needed to do the bili lights for 24 hours, so we had to stay a day later. She lost more than the normal weight so we had to go to the pediatrician a bit more at first for weight checks and I had to supplement the whole time because I was never able to produce enough.
But overall, a very healthy delivery and baby.
TTC #1 5/13 BFP #3 5/2/14 DD born 1/19/15
NTNP #2 8/17 BFP 12/13/18 ED 8/21/19
I was scheduled for induction at 39w, and went to a regular appointment at the MFM doctor at 36w4d. At the appointment, my fluid was measuring very low, so they sent me straight to the hospital to be induced. It was the ONLY appointment DH had not been to because he was at home with strep throat. I called DH, told him to pack a bag and get to the hospital.
That evening at the hospital they started me on cervadil, and at some point gave me an ambien so I could sleep. I slept some with no contractions. The next morning at 8am they started me on pitocin. At 2cm dilated they asked if I wanted an epidural. They explained that there was one anesthesiologist on staff and he was about to go into surgery and they could not guarantee I would be able to get one if I didn’t get it then. I chose to get it then.
They day day was great. We had family visit and I napped most of time. I woke up and told my husband something was wrong, I was feeling pain, and told him to call the nurse. That was about 7:30pm. She came in and checked me and I was 9.5 cm. The epidural had quit working and she had me labor down. I did that for about 30 minutes before I told her to call the doctor. She checked me and told me to stop pushing but my body couldn’t stop. The doctor got there and I could finally push. DDs heartrate started dropping so they gave me the oxygen mask, and DD was born at 8:24 pm.
I was was able to do skin to skin and delayed cord clamping. I had two 3rd degree tears and another small tear.
DD wouldn’t latch, they called her a sleepy baby. I pumped in the hospital and the laceration nurses had me giving her 10ml via syringe every three hours.
The next day, DD has developed jaundiced. She had to be under the light non stop almost. She was doing great though and they discharged us after 48 hours with a bill blanket to use at home to finish clearing up the jaundice.
Scary part: the nurses at the hospital had discharged us with clear instructions to feed DD 10ml every 3 hours. I tried to get her to latch at every feeding for 10 minutes, and then we would syringe feed her. I was producing much more than 10ml at a time and was building quite a supply.
We took DD to her checkup at the pediatrician who said she was losing too much weight, and may need to be hospitalized. He asked us how much she was eating and we told him. He turned white. He told us we were pretty much starving her, and to let her eat what she would at every feeding. He let us go home but with an appointment in two days to check weight again. We took her home and started feeding her what she wanted. After a day she finally latched. When we took her back to the doctor she was gaining weight. All smooth sailing from there.
TLDR; low fluid, got induced, pretty good birth. Always feed baby what they want, don’t limit their intake.
Friday night couldn't sleep and had diarrhea to top it off. Waited till 5 AM on Saturday and called the hospital. They asked me to drink plenty of water and wait an hour. If I still felt bad then I should come in. Went to the hospital at 7.00 AM. Guess what? I am going home with my baby! I was not at all dilated but the contractions were so severe, they want me to deliver that day.
Got my epidural after a long wait to see if I will dilate on my own and then ended up getting pitocin as well. After pushing for 2 hrs, my healthy handsome boy was born at around 11.30 Saturday night.
I don't think I will ever forget this ever.
@sourlemon You’re a trooper. Many hopes for a smooth delivery for you this pregmamcy!
Other than having trouble getting the numbing in my spine ("curl up in a ball" when you're 9 months pregnant is no easy task. I can only imagine if you're trying to do it with contractions in the mix) it was textbook. I healed really well and had no complications - though it was funny being passed by grandma's in walkers on my first walk out of the house 😂
BFP #1 June 2016: EDD 16 March 2017, MC July 2016
Re-started TTC Aug 2016
Started IF testing Nov 2016
Spontaneous BFP #2 January 2017: Rainbow Baby Boy September 2017
BFP #3 November 2018: Baby #2 expected August 2019
DD2- I went to work two days before my due date. I had a lot of work to finish before maternity leave. I was having contractions, but didn't think much of them. (Since I was induced at 41 weeks before, I didn't think I could have a baby early). Worked the whole day, went home and ate dinner. Decided at some point that this may be the real deal. Checked in the hospital at 5:30 PM...Waited in triage for an hour so they could monitor my progress. Was admitted to L&D. Barely had time to get the epidural and baby was born with a few pushes around 9:00 PM.
Two fairly easy births for me. Hoping #3 treats me kindly as well.
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
I thought it was annoying enough that they looked up visiting hours and just showed up in the morning without even talking to us or asking when would be a good time to come. Then my FIL went to work, and DH got sick from lack of sleep so my MIL brought him home, and my SIL just invited herself to sit in my room the whole day. I’m sure she was trying to keep me company, but I was hours in to being a mother and I just wanted space to figure some things out.
TTC #1 5/13 BFP #3 5/2/14 DD born 1/19/15
NTNP #2 8/17 BFP 12/13/18 ED 8/21/19
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
My blood pressure started getting wonky about 37/38 weeks. I was having no other signs of pre-e, just really sporadically high BP. I did all the testing to be sure it wasn't pre-e, and then had to monitor my BP at home. Well, 39 week appointment arrives, I take my BP log in, and my BP was spiking too high for them to let me go home. So, they attempted a membrane sweep, and I went straight from that appointment to L&D for induction. At this point I was not even a fingertip dilated, closed up tight.
Freaking out I call my DH, doula, and head to L&D. They do the cervical ripening pill twice through the day to get me to open enough to place a Foley bulb that evening. My practice tries very hard to start inductions without going to pitocin. I had hoped for a completely med free delivery, so this was way outside my comfort zone & they tried to respect my wishes.
By that night, I had dilated just enough for the Foley bulb insertion, which was uncomfortable but I squeezed my husband's & doula's hands and got through it. Such an awkward feeling! My body really responded to the bulb, and for some reason I threw up every hour all night long, almost like clockwork. Morning rolls around, 12 hours later they are coming to take it out, it slips out with almost no trouble & we discover I'm already at 6 CM! That was really exciting. My doctor feels for head positioning, to make sure he is nicely in place and SPLASH my water broke everywhere - some even splashed in my doula's hair.
After another BP check, "perfectly respectable for a laboring woman" I was freed to walk the halls & try to get contractions going. So we walked & squatted for about an hour with every contraction. Then we went back to the room for some juice and popsicles and did some rocking in a rocking chair which I was really loving for some reason. The contractions were coming pretty regularly now, so we turned on my labor playlist and just slow danced through them while the sun was going down. Time passes really strangely in labor, so I don't know when they recommended an epidural so I could get some sleep. I was very tired from being up the night before, and couldn't get comfortable laying down, so sometime in the middle of the night I agreed, very reluctantly. They had to try twice to place it, and finally got it in. A few hours later I woke up with feeling returning way low on my stomach; the epidural was no longer working. Anesthesia wasn't available to replace it. So now I was stuck in bed and getting consistently more uncomfortable. By the morning I had feeling back to my knees almost. They check and I'm really close to pushing, so they reposition me. & do some rebozo type stuff and like magic it's time to push!
I pushed for 2 1/2 hours and he made it to +1 station, but he kept going back up after every push. His heart rate was starting to go down, so they tried to use the vacuum which slipped off twice. At that point his heart rate suddenly could not take continued labor and took a real dive that scared us all to death and we were literally running down the hall to the OR with people shouting everywhere.
If you recall, my epidural has almost completely worn off, THEY attempted twice to pump more medicine in but it was not working, so I'm sobbing and freaked out, they won't let my husband or doula in, and they have to put me under general anesthesia. It was incredibly scary and felt like forever, but my DH says it was literally 2 minutes. Within 5 more minutes, DH reported that my DS was safely out, and given to him to sit in the NICU to await my return from recovery. It was roughly 2 hours for them to finish surgery & for me to be fully awake. Once DH laid him on my chest I did not let him out of my sight again for, well, probably 3+ months.
All in all, everyone is safe and ok. It was a very scary end to a labor that had some very good parts. I still cry at times when I think about working so hard, and being in 3 days of labor and then at the very end, missing his birth. I didn't get to hear his first cry, my husband didn't even get to be in the room let alone cut the cord. It feels quite a bit like we got jipped. I'm still processing a lot of the feelings.
@WinchesterGirl Hugs 💛
My 7 Year Journey ***Tw in spoiler***
IVF #1 - September 2018; Follistim, Menopur, Cetrotide & Lupron/HCG combo trigger; PGS; ICSI
Back on Levothyroxine
FET #1 - October 2018; cancelled, all PGS aneuploid
FET #1 - November 30th, transferred anyway
Wondfo BFP 5dp5dt, CB Digi 6dpt,
1st Beta on 7dpt 93
2nd Beta on 10dpt 510!
TTC #1 since 2011. Tried for 5 years before we knew there was a one year rule.
Diag w/MS 2016; w/PCOS & IF 2017
New RE 2018; PCOS diagnosis taken away, IF due to ovary adhesions, but prev. RE insists PCOS IF
IUI
IUI #1 July 2017 w/100mg Clo+trigger; BFN; benched w/big cysts
IUI #2 October 2017 w/50mg Clo+trigger; BFN; benched w/big cysts
IUI #3 February 2018 w/5mg Femara+trigger; low P
BFP February; mc March; Subclinical hypothyroid started Levothyroxine
IUI #4 March 2018 w/7.5mg Femara+trigger; BFN
Medicated cycle & TI April 2018 w/7.5mg Femara+trigger; BFN
Tried several cycles on our own; all BFN
I found out my DD was breech at a bout 38 weeks. We planed to do a version at 40+2, where the doctors tried to turn her from the outside. They would have then induced me. They were monitoring her heartbeat the whole time. It hurt so bad! On the 3rd try her heart beat went completely irregular and the doctor called a stat c-section. They pulled me out of the room in a hurry and I looked at my husband and just started crying. I was so scared. They ran me to the OR while I heard them paging everyone over the loudspeaker for a STAT c-section. We got to the OR and I moved to the OR bed and immediately looked for the lady in charge of checking the babies heart beat. She put the monitor back on my belly and found the heart beat was back to normal. They thankfully were able to cancel the stat and proceeded with a non-emergency c-section. I got an epidural. My husband was able to come in and sit next to me while DD was born. Everyone says it goes so quickly when you have a c-section, and in actual time it probably did but in my head time it took forever. She immediately started crying and was perfect. When the pediatrician came to see her later that day, she said she heard a heart murmur. I passed it off as nothing because me and all my siblings have heart murmurs.. so ok? But thankfully the doctor pushed and on the third day she had an echocardiogram. I was still thinking the doctor is just being overly cautious and even said to my husband while we were sitting there with her at the echo that I couldn't believe we go home today! Not long after the comment was she admitted into the NICU for her heart defects, one of which was a severe pulmonary stenosis. She stayed 3 more days, and we were allowed to go home once the doctors felt comfortable enough oxygenated blood was getting to her lungs even though the valves were not right. She was monitored closely over the next weeks, and at 3 weeks old she had to have her surgery to fix her valve. They had originally wanted to wait until she was 6 weeks but her heart walls were thickening to a dangerous point. The surgery worked better than we could have hoped and she is has been happy and healthy ever since. She will have continued monitoring but almost that no restrictions.
This makes me want to have an elective c-section. My doctor wants me to try a vbac. I think because my DDs birth was a bit traumatic and I had zero control I don't want to. I know there is no such thing as being able to control a situation but I feel like taking a c-section instead of trying to labor is better for me mentally. Choosing to try to labor feels like the same decision I made to have a version and it just didn't go well. With a c-section I will know what to expect and I'd rather that.
Me 32
H 33
TTC#1 January 2016 BFP 5/16/2016 DD Born 1/27/17
TFAS: BFP 11/26/2018 Estimated due date: 8/2/2019
*TW - emergency c-section
I went in for my regularly scheduled 39 wk appointment at 39+5, and thankfully DH decided to join me. My blood pressure, which had been low/normal for the entire pregnancy was through-the-roof high. OB did a membrane sweep, and sent me over to L&D triage. My BP didn’t lower while laying there doing nothing, and my labs were boarderline for pre-e, and they discovered I was actually having contractions every 3-4 minutes, so they decided to admit and induce me.
Once I was admitted DH went home to grab our stuff. I ordered myself a steak dinner, the nurse administered my first dose of misoprostol for cervical ripening, and I settled in to watch some basketball on TV...this was about 8-9pm. DH came back with my in-laws, who came down to watch our dog. As we were visiting, around 11pm, my water broke. Since I was also having regular contractions, the on-call OB decided to forget the induction and let me continue without assistance. I was given permission to walk around a little, and when we were done with that I was REALLY starting to feel the contractions. I labored naturally for the next couple of hours, and my contractions were sooo close together. That time is honestly just a blur.
Around 1am I decided to inquire about an epidural, so they gave me fluids and had the anesthesiologist come place it. Unfortunately it tanked my high blood pressure, and they had to give me ephedrine to bring it back up, and those big swings caused me to vomit up that nice steak dinner. But once I was stabilized, I felt fantastic and managed to get a bit of sleep between cervical checks.
The overnight OB came in around 7am. I was about 7cm dilated and he told me I would probably deliver around noon. My regular OB came in to chat around 8am. We knew that the baby’s heart rate had been going down during contractions, and she explained that the baby’s cord was likely around the neck but not to worry and that they would take care of it during delivery (she was correct - the cord was wrapped around DD’s neck not once, but twice...she was “really tangled up in there”).
I told DH to go join my in-laws for breakfast, since he might miss lunch. Right when we came back, a bit after 9am, he was met with my OB and about a dozen nurses rushing into my room. Apparently DD had gone into distress, and since I was only 8cm dilated they made the quick decision to rush me in for a c-section.
Thankfully DH was allowed to join me in the OR. Once they opened me up they made the discovery that DD’s umbilical cord was not attached correctly to her placenta - it’s called a velamentous insertion. As a result, contractions can cause the cord to separate from the placenta and the baby can lose a lot of blood, leading to a stillbirth situation. Thankfully I was being monitored closely and it was caught so quickly that DD was delivered just before the cord tore...and therefore she was 100% ok. But we were very very close to a horrible situation.
So I didn’t get the immediate skin-to-skin and delayed cord. Because she had to be checked by the NICU team, I didn’t get to see or hold her for 15 or 20 minutes after she was born. But she was perfectly healthy and that was an amazing outcome. I was bed-ridden for about 24hrs, and in general recovery was painful....but I survived! I’m really hoping for a less dramatic (hopefully VBAC!) delivery with the twins!
DS - I ended up getting induced a few days after my due date. Start to finish was about 8 hours. Not quite as exciting as going into labor naturally. I don’t think I have ever been such a combination of tired, hungry, and just physically exhausted after this birth. I could barely understand what people were saying to me for a little while and ate 2 complete dinners that evening.
Hoping to go into labor naturally this time. It was longer and more painful but I think an overall better experience.
@Allycat11I love that you stuck to your guns and got your birth. And yikes, your MIL needs to step back! ❤
@WinchesterGirl I'm so sorry you had such a crazy birth. That must be heartbreaking to have gone through so much and been right there and then be totally out for the birth. You are an absolute warrior though - look at what you went through to get your little one safely into the world! You're such a good mama. ❤
@aecm I'm so so glad you got your girl out safely before the cord detached. Oh my goodness. ❤
LONG post, sorry in advance!!
***TW for whole birth story*** death of my parent, emergency c-section, rude OB/hospital staff.
My mom died from breast cancer during the first trimester of my pregnancy with DD. It was the most horrible experience I've ever had and I still have PTSD from it - it affected the rest of my pregnancy and birth choices. I was working with a group of hospital midwives at an OB office and during the middle of my 2nd tri I was admitted to L&D due to bizarre contractions that ended up being spasms from coughing from bronchitis. While in L&D they had me put on a hospital gown for examining me, and it happened to be the same color/pattern gown that my mother had died in months earlier. This caused me to have a massive panic attack and the nurses were extremely unkind about the whole thing. The experience of panic in the hospital caused me to switch to a licensed homebirth practice, but due to laws in my state I had to also continue seeing the OB for hospital privileges just in case and couldn't tell them about also seeing a homebirth practice because the OB would drop me.
Fast forward, I'm 2 weeks overdue with DS. The OB practice wanted to induce me at 40w, but I refused. I end up going into labor naturally at exactly 42w, homebirth & doula team was great and so supportive. My grandma (mom's mom, almost 90yo at the time) was there and kept saying (in her thick Puerto Rican accent) "Ohmygod, Ohmygod, she'll never do it, she'll never do it, Ohmygod..." We laugh about it now but I was decidedly unamused at the time. 31 hours after my water broke they called it and sent me to the hospital - I had been 10cm dilated for a while and just about to crown for the last 5 hours but DS wouldn't budge any further.
We call ahead and go to the hospital, I'm so tired and shaky and just done by this point, and I pee all over the wheelchair and floor as the orderly pushes me down the hall to admit me. 😨 Poor guy. They get me to L&D and have me push for 3 more hours, but my contractions start to slow at this point so they give me pitocin and an epidural so I can labor down - spoiler alert: it doesn't work. Eventually they decide on an emergency section because they start to see meconium and my contractions are stalling again. The OB comes in wearing a bucket of cologne and a v-neck t-shirt to show off his manly chest hair, and proceeds to tell me that I am at fault for everything that is happening, that my baby will be 10lbs, that I should 100% blame myself for having to have a c-section. Meanwhile I'm sobbing, and my doula is rubbing my back while he's talking, and she's loudly saying, "He's a mother f***er, He's a liar," etc.
In the OR the OB and assistant OB decide tho put on a Journey CD and blast "Don't Stop Believin'" on repeat during the surgery. No joke. Thankfully surgery went well, baby girl was fine, and initial recovery and breastfeeding was great. (She was 8lbs, btw, not 10.)
We stayed in the hospital for 5 days, nurses there were wonderful, but the pediatrician who came in on the last day yelled at me because DD had lost close to 10% of her birth weight (this was also the first time anyone showed concern over her weight at all) and said that DD would die and it would be my fault. Yay! She finally let us go home though since breastfeeding/latch/supply was good and we promised to take DD into our pediatrician for frequent weight checks right away. We did, everything was fine.
Last but not least, the OB didn't wear gloves when he took out the staples from my incision and it got infected. He didn't believe me that it was infected so I had to go in for an exam again. I got my antibiotics and never saw that man again, thank God.
***End TW***
This time I'm with a different practice, OB only, different hospital. My doctor is extremely VBAC supportive and half of me wants to at least do a TOLAC, but part of me is nervous about having another emergency section after a trying labor. I don't want to be completely physically depleted while going in for major abdominal surgery. Thankfully I have some time to decide.
@skp480 *hugs* I lost my mom to cancer at 15 weeks with DS2. It was devastating. She was my best friend, my rock and super close to DS1. I didn’t grieve until after he was born. I was in denial and angry and scared I would “hurt the baby”. I do not recommend postponing the grieving process.
DS2 and this baby have very close due dates and the 7th anniversary of her death was two weeks ago. I’m doing better these days and and can talk about it without bawling, but I have my moments. Especially when I think how much the kids are missing out without knowing her.
I think I was around 40+4 when a routine ultrasound showed low fluid levels, and they told us to head to the hospital to be induced. DH and I had driven to the appointment separately so he went to grab his laptop from the office and I went home to get out stuff together. We ate lunch and then headed to the hospital. I'd hoped to go as med free as possible, so I opted for the Foley bulb. In a couple hours i got up to pee and my water broke. The contractions started with some regularity. I labored in the tub for a while and things got more intense. I wanted to try nitrous, but the hospital was short staffed and there wasn't a nurse available to administer it (something along those lines, I'm probably not remembering correctly), so I eventually opted for nubane, which let me doze between contractions for a few hours before it wore off. At about noon the next day DS's heart rate started slowing with contractions so they decided they wanted to use pitocin. I was really nervous because I'd heard contractions were more intense with pitocin, so I opted for the epidural. Once they gave me pitocin things progressed pretty quickly. I pushed for about 20 minutes and DS was out. I had a 2nd degree tear, but the recovery from it was ok. I had hoped for a med free birth, but had been open to going with the flow. This birth wasn't my "plan a," but I think it went as well as it could have.
I was GB+ for both births. My mom lives a 4 hour drive away. I told her that I understand that labor is unpredictable, but since they say it usually takes several hours I would like her to be in the room if possible.
With DS#1 we kept having induction scares thanks to low fluid, but I basically drank my weight in water, and was able to stay above the threshold were they would have forced me to be induced. I made it to 40+6, I woke up with mild pain that I thought couldn't be real contractions because it didn't hurt enough. I worked from home all day, and at 6 pm after having the pain on and off all day, I decided to call my doula. She said that what I was describing could be labor, or could be Braxton-Hicks, I should take a bath, and try and sleep. DH forced me to eat dinner. I called my parents, and told them that this could be it, or it could be nothing. Since they are both morning people they decided to get an early nights sleep and head out when they woke up around 5/6 am. I took a bath, and then went to the bathroom, and had a bloody tell. I called my doula, and she said the tell could show up days before labor really started, and I should still try and sleep. I told DH he should get some sleep, because who knew if he's be able to in the coming days. I lay in bed, and had irregular contractions. Sometimes I dozed between, and sometimes I read. After every contraction I felt the need to pee, and every time I went to the bathroom there was *TMI* yellowish green mucus. At around 3 I texted my parents that they should head out as soon as they woke up. At around 3:30 am my contraction were about 10 minutes apart, and the mucus has been consistent for hours. I called my doula, and she said that mucus was not uncommon, and it didn't sound like there was enough that my water broke. I mentioned that I couldn't remember the last time I felt the baby move, and she said that once labor starts it's not uncommon but if that and/or the mucus had me worried I should listen to my instinct and call the doctor. While I was on hold with the doctor's answering service I needed to pee again, so I woke DH. The doctor said the same thing as my doula, but said that if it would make me feel better I could go to the hospital for a check of the baby's heart rate. We headed to the hospital fully expecting to be sent right home, so we told my doula to wait, they only let one visitor in the triage area, and it didn't make sense for her to come to the hospital, if she would just have to go home with us.
We got to the hospital around 5 am, and while we were waiting to get called into triage my parents texted that they were on their way. We went into triage, and it turns out that my water was leaking, and I was 5 cm dilated!!
We told my doula to come to the hospital and in the time between when I was admitted and she showed up they asked me if I was sure I didn't want an epidural 3 times! By the third time I told them, "yes, and stop asking me until my doula shows up and reminds me why I don't want it."
They put me on monitors and started an IV drip of antibiotics for the GB. They said the drip would take 20 minutes, and once it was done I would be allowed to "labor freely" without the monitors. At this point time lost all meaning. I labored in a rocking chair for a while. Then my OB came for another check and I was 8 cm dilated, and starting transition. My doula asked my OB if I could labor in the shower and she said yes. It was the most amazing thing. The pain was unbelievable, but I leaned on the bar of the shower, and my doula aimed the handheld spray at my lower back, and it really helped. After I changed into a dry gown, and got into the bed, my OB came back and did another check, and I was complete. They told me I should start trying to push, I got up on my knees, and did a few pushes in that position. At that point my mom walked into the room. The OB recommended I try pushing on my back, so I did that, and after what seemed like a very long time (and several screams later) I had a beautiful boy in my arms. Born 8lb 5oz at 11:12 am. My OB said that the difference in my pushes before and after my mom showed up was very evident, and it was obvious I was subconsciously waiting for her.
DS#2 started off in a similar manner I woke up on my due date with on and off contractions all day that I wasn't sure if they were real or BH. By 11 pm I was pretty sure it was the real thing, but they were still very far apart so I told DH to get some sleep, and we would let the parents know in the morning (Mine so they could drive down, his so they could take DS#1). I woke DH at 4 am with a change of plans. They were about 7 minutes apart, so it "wasn't urgent" but we should probably tell his parents to come out since they live 20 minutes away, we called them and made arrangements. A few minutes later the contractions suddenly jumped to just 3 minutes apart. I called my doula and the doctor and they both said to get to the hospital. We called my ILs and said change of plans meet us at the hospital. We called my parents and said get in the car as soon as you can.
My contractions stayed consistent in the car, and when we got to the check-in desk my water broke. I highly recommend it, it meant we got to skip triage, and go right to a room. As my doula was helping me change into a gown I asked her if it was possible I already felt the need to push. She said yes, and walked me through holding a push. They then made me hold off pushing for 20 minutes while I got the IV antibiotics (holding in a push is almost as hard as pushing.) I was finally free to push. It had happened so fast that when I started pushing the hospital's on call OB was there, because my doctor hadn't made it in yet. My doctor did show up in the middle of pushing. My practice has several OBs, so you deliver with who ever is on call, the OB I had with DS#1 was a woman who had given birth herself and had no problem with my screaming. The OB with DS#2 was a man, and he kept telling me to stop screaming and put that energy into pushing, I wanted to scream at him, that he could tell me not to scream once he had pushed a baby out of his private parts.
DS#2 was 8lb 1oz and born at 6:02 am. (My parents didn't show up until several hours later.)
*TW for baby briefly at risk but everything ok*
DD was super punctual. I woke up with my first serious contraction at 4:39(ish) am the day of my IVF-determined EDD, and she was born at 4:39 pm the next day on the OB-determined EDD, so a very tidy 36 hours!
I labored for 20 hours at home with contractions every 7 minutes or so for most of the day. It was a magical, surreal day with DH and my mom and sister. I was able to have a couple of solid meals, do breathing exercises on the exercise ball, and we started a marathon of the Harry Potter movies. I’m a big nerd rule follower and refused to go to the hospital until I fulfilled exactly the parameters (4-1-2 I think), even though my mom was gently pushing me to go a few hours into labor (she’s a doctor but not an OB, but she was all mom instinct during that time and was like “someone help maaaayyyy bayybeeee”). We finally left halfway through Goblet of Fire.
I was so proud of laboring for so long but YOU GUYS I was only at 1.5 cm! They were going to send me home (I think my mom would have burned the building down) but my blood pressure had started to inch up from the physical stress, so they wound up admitting me. They also noticed the baby’s heart rate was getting weird with my contractions. They gave me some narcotics to help me rest since I still had far to go, and I spent the next 10 hours or so in and out of consciousness.
I wasn’t progressing well so they told me they were going to start me on pitocin, but I insisted on an epidural first bc I’d heard pitocin contractions were brutal. So I was stuck in bed when they then decided to break my water, which was pretty gross. As my contractions got stronger, baby’s heart rate started going through some serious decelerations, so everyone went into alert and told me we really needed to start pushing ASAP.
I was told to expect to push for 2-3 hours but I got pretty far in about 30 minutes. DH, my mom, and my sister took turns counting me through my contractions and it was very sweet. The epidural was on the light side and it was hard work (I credit years of yoga, which I’m terrible at, and a long life of migraines for the mental coping mechanisms I jumped into to push through the pain), and there was mounting concern about the baby’s heart rate.
As DD started to be born, the doctor saw the cord was wrapped around her neck TWICE, which meant she was essentially being strangled with every contraction, and worse and worse the further she got through the birth canal, so they couldn’t let her go any further. So he’s like “look at the next contraction... don’t push. Just pant” and like your ENTIRE BEING is SCREAMING to push at this point so “not pushing” feels like violating the time-space continuum. While I was somehow “not pushing” the dr veeeery carefully slipped scissors between the baby’s neck, the two coils of the cord, and my delicate lady parts and set her free, so she was born easily after that. PHEW.
After that I had a few minutes of calm with snuggles and skin to skin, but when they took her to get weighed and checked, my placenta apparently went haywire with a latent infection. I went from chilling drinking some apple juice to all of a sudden throwing up violently, shaking so hard I was almost convulsing, and my temperature shot in to 104 in minutes. In the 36 hours of labor this is legitimately the only time I felt things spiraling out of control. This lasted until I delivered the placenta and then cleared up like clockwork.
DD was jaundiced bc of a blood type incongruity between us and spent the first few days in the NICU, which was sad and difficult but she recovered well enough that we were discharged together. We returned home, settled on the couch, and picked up exactly where we left off in Goblet of Fire.
With DD1, my water broke around 2 am and we called L&D triage. The woman ((smartly)) told me to eat food and take my time coming in. I was way to nervous to eat, so I had some cereal. Such a rookie mistake. We got there so they could confirm it was actually my water. They confirmed it was amniotic fluid, but they also said I was only at 1cm. SEVENTEEN hours later we learned when I was finally dilated to about 5cm that my water had not actually broken - just a leak. So when they asked if I wanted them to break my water, I was like, "SERIOUSLY??" Some where else in there was a really rude doctor who checked me quickly and without a lot of empathy for how long I'd been there. Here's what else I do remember: I took two baths (I was in a suite with a birthing tub). The second bath ended in vomit as a I transitioned. DH and I like to joke about it now because I was so hot from the transition and he was like, "You have to get out of the tub. You threw up." And I was like SHUT UP, YOU DID THIS TO ME. That was also the moment I demanded an epidural. I hadn't really planned one way or another on the epidural, but was at a University Hospital in a crunchy college town, so I was leaning towards no. 36 hours of labor and a eight-and-a-half pound baby changed my mind. I pushed for four hours. I kept falling asleep between pushes because at that point I hadn't slept much in days. My epidural was there but I swear to you my daughter was hanging on to my insides and was not feeling getting out, so I felt a lot of pain. *TW* I ended up having a fourth degree tear. I got to do like, 5 minutes of skin-to-skin (during which DD1 pooped all over me), and then they wheeled me away to the OR to be stitched up. They left DD1 with DH literally all alone in the hospital room, which of course terrified him. Recovery from my tear was actually not as bad as I would have thought, but I also think that was because I was all young and exercising through pregnancy.
For DD2, I had a scheduled c-section as a result of 1) the fourth degree tear and 2) my gestational diabetes. **TW** I hated. Hated. Hated. having a c-section. DD2 had to go to NICU for labored breathing for a bit and I didn't get to see her or hold her for almost 5 hours. I had horrible nurses (at the hospital that has a reputation in our entire REGION OF THE COUNTRY as having the best nurses ever) and no one actually ever told me that when I was ready, I should try walking a bit. I didn't stay on top of my pain medication either (which is c-section rookie mistake 101) because I thought I had a "high pain tolerance" and so was left in tears A LOT. DH was also suffering from allergies (cry me a river) and was kind of a lump that almost week we were in the hospital. I also did not take care of myself well enough in my post-hospital recovery and was left with a lot of pelvic issues (a pelvic tilt, diasti recti), which I have no one to blame but my stubborn self (I was way to focused on making breastfeeding work and was exclusively pumping).
So that is why this pregnancy was a shocker to us - I was going to wait until I was better healed (so it another year or two) to have our third and final baby. But that said, I'm very excited. I've come to terms with my repeat c-section fears and will take much better care of myself this time.
With DD2 I was 3 days "late" and at work I had a small leak of fluid, but nothing else happened so I assumed I must have peed myself... that evening as I was picking the kids up from daycare I had another slightly larger leak of fluids... I was sure I hadn't peed myself twice in one day. (I say this because they tell you you know when your water breaks... but if your having small leaks it can be really hard to tell if its the real thing or just normal urine leaking during pregnancy). after getting the kids fed and bathed (because of course there had to be a massive poo-splosion) I went to L&D since I was group B+. Yup it was amniotic fluid, so I was there to stay. I was barely 1cm dilated and not feeling contractions. As a VBAC my induction options were limited) so I walked the halls literally from 7pm to about 10am. with two 20 min stops. (every time I tried to rest my contractions stopped) Overnight They placed a folley catheter for balloon dilation and by 7am I had gotten to 5cm. the MW fully broke my water and I kept walking.... but at 10am I was not progressing unless I was moving and I was getting worn out. Reluctantly I started pitocin and was able to labor in the tub for a while. By mid/late afternoon I was checked again and still only at a 5. I had hoped not to have an epidural but I was having trouble relaxing between contractions and was so tired I opted for one. It took a while to get an anesthesiologist (they kept getting called away) but just after the epidural was placed they checked me and I was an 8! I slept for about an hour and it was time to push. I never thought I would want a mirror but it was kind of nice to watch the babies progress. She took a little to arrive, I think partially because the cord was wrapped around her neck, in the end she arrived safe and sound and I had my VBAC. It was ~40 hours from my first fluid leak and 48 hours since I'd had any real sleep but she was so worth it.
I'm really hoping this one will be a little bit more excited to join the world !
eta: I had a ton of pelvic floor weakness after DD2. Its not normal to not be able to hold your pee (ie as soon as you feel the need to pee you have to run to the toilet or else), or leak all the time (sneezing, moving, jumping, laughing) if your having any issues talk to your care provider and find a good PT who specializes in pelvic floor issues. You do not have to live with peeing your self post baby.
Diagnosed : unexplained infertility
6 rounds of IUI and a MC 2/2014, rainbow twins 4/2015
TTC #3 5/2016
Restarted Fertility tx
IUI 2 rounds, baby girl 12/17