For the baby stage, I really liked Babywise. I gave away my book but now I kind of wish I hadn't, but the gist is that instead of a schedule where at 10am you feed baby, etc, it's more of a rotation or routine. Eat, Play, Sleep. Feed the baby, play with the baby, and then put them down to sleep. In the early days there was a lot more time spent eating and sleeping than playing but eventually DD1 got quicker at eating and could stay awake longer. Anytime she would cry knowing what was coming up next helped me determine if she was crying because she was hungry, wanted to be held/changed, or was tired. It also made it easier to get out of the house because I could sort of predict that she'd wake up, want to eat and then I'd have a little time before she was ready to fall asleep again.
For the older baby/toddler stage, I like Janet Lansbury's books about respectful/gentle parenting. It explains that there's a fine line between giving kids limited options that they can choose and feel in control, while still maintaining boundaries and not letting them run the show/act inappropriately. It's about giving and expecting respect and leading by example, which really resonates with me. Se also has a podcast and a FB group where she answers a lot of questions if you don't want to buy and read the books, but I found them useful.
DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
I liked Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby for the baby stage, and it covers the same Babywise method that @meggyme described. Not only did I come to figure out my girls' cycles in terms of what they needed, but I started to actually be able to tell a difference in the way they were crying as they got older (which I thought was all complete nonsense before I had kids. But I seriously think they cry differently depending on what they need).
I also liked Bringing Up Bebe and The Danish Way of Parenting, and generally tend to favor any books that focus on respecting your kids without letting them walk all over you and highlight the importance of basic play for development, as opposed to Baby Einstein flashcards and organized classes from the age of 6 weeks (which I think are total BS, but totally respect those who feel the need to start socializing their kids at a young age). Or maybe I'm just too lazy for that stuff!
@dtspmama +1 for the Healthy Sleep Habits. And I know a lot of people don't want to read it because of the extinction (or "cry-it-out") method he made popular, but for us it happened just like he explicitly mentioned in the book: once we had a routine down and made sure DS1 is well rested, we could put him down drowsy and he would fall asleep on his own. We didn't need to sleep-train at all!
@mihaelams1 exactly. We never had to sleep train either of our girls. We started putting the girls down drowsy as soon as they woke up from their sleepy newborn phase, worked like a charm!
@dtspmama@mihaelams1 I think this is really great advice. I waited waaaaaaay too long to deal with this with my daughter and it was hell.
About when did they leave the drowsy newborn stage and you started on this? I really want to do better this time, and I feel like I just missed knowing when the baby was old enough to start.
@maggiemadeit We started at 3.5 months, he was cooing instead of crying when I was putting him down for a nap But I made sure we had a good routine down, we used black-out curtains and white noise and swaddled him. I'm not sure we can provide the same quiet and peaceful environment for DS2 with DS1 being an active and loud toddler.
Wonder weeks was a pretty frequently cited reference for me with dd, but the app was even more valuable than the book, and can be useful even without the book.
@dtspmama@mihaelams1 Thanks ladies. I will start looking for cues much much earlier this time!
@sejica We used the wonder weeks app and I found it so helpful. It helped me understand and have more empathy when my daughter was going through developmental changes that you can’t necessarily really see on the outside.
@sejica@maggiemadeit add me to the list for being a fan of the Wonder Weeks app. That thing was a lifesaver during the weeks when I've looked at my DDs and not known wtf they were freaking out about!
I just realized I recommended the wrong book. Haha! I found the babywise book in my amazon cloud reader and started reviewing it. I meant to recommend The Baby Whisperer. That has the E.A.S.Y. method (eat, activity, sleep, you time). There's some good info in the Babywise book too, but Baby Whisperer is what I was thinking of earlier.
DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
Another vote for The Wondrer Weeks. Helped so much with our son. We were gifted the book by a mom of 5 so I took that as solid "advice" to read it and follow along. Love to see some other good recommendatios here, thanks!
Another recommendation for Wonder Weeks (we used the app). So helpful for that first year.
Happiest Baby on the Block, especially to learn about the "fourth trimester". Some of the soothing techniques are on YouTube as well.
Another one I enjoyed when DS got older was Simplicity Parenting. Lots about simplifying the physical amount of stuff that your kids have to create room for more imaginative play and a more peaceful environment.
I’m not a fan of the “strict schedule” books. All babies have different needs, and I think it’s more about finding a routine that works for you and your baby, and trusting yourself to know what your baby needs.
Another vote for wonder weeks and Happiest Baby on the Block. For breastfeeding, the womanly art of breastfeeding, and followed with Baby led Weaning. For sleep, the no-cry sleep solution (which also has a helpful Facebook group).
My faves: happiest baby on the block so that’s what they’re for: the definitive breastfeeding guide Oh crap! Pottytraining happiest toddler on the block the explosive child
on my list: how toddlers thrive Peaceful parent, happy siblings Nobody ever told me that! (On oral development) raising a healthy happy eater (OT recommendation) & now the baby whisperer!
currently reading ‘the out of sync child’ for my kiddo with sensory needs
Re: Product Spotlight: Parenting Books
For the older baby/toddler stage, I like Janet Lansbury's books about respectful/gentle parenting. It explains that there's a fine line between giving kids limited options that they can choose and feel in control, while still maintaining boundaries and not letting them run the show/act inappropriately. It's about giving and expecting respect and leading by example, which really resonates with me. Se also has a podcast and a FB group where she answers a lot of questions if you don't want to buy and read the books, but I found them useful.
I also liked Bringing Up Bebe and The Danish Way of Parenting, and generally tend to favor any books that focus on respecting your kids without letting them walk all over you and highlight the importance of basic play for development, as opposed to Baby Einstein flashcards and organized classes from the age of 6 weeks (which I think are total BS, but totally respect those who feel the need to start socializing their kids at a young age). Or maybe I'm just too lazy for that stuff!
I think this is really great advice. I waited waaaaaaay too long to deal with this with my daughter and it was hell.
About when did they leave the drowsy newborn stage and you started on this? I really want to do better this time, and I feel like I just missed knowing when the baby was old enough to start.
@sejica We used the wonder weeks app and I found it so helpful. It helped me understand and have more empathy when my daughter was going through developmental changes that you can’t necessarily really see on the outside.
Happiest Baby on the Block, especially to learn about the "fourth trimester". Some of the soothing techniques are on YouTube as well.
Another one I enjoyed when DS got older was Simplicity Parenting. Lots about simplifying the physical amount of stuff that your kids have to create room for more imaginative play and a more peaceful environment.
Another vote for wonder weeks and Happiest Baby on the Block. For breastfeeding, the womanly art of breastfeeding, and followed with Baby led Weaning. For sleep, the no-cry sleep solution (which also has a helpful Facebook group).
happiest baby on the block
so that’s what they’re for: the definitive breastfeeding guide
Oh crap! Pottytraining
happiest toddler on the block
the explosive child
on my list:
how toddlers thrive
Peaceful parent, happy siblings
Nobody ever told me that! (On oral development)
raising a healthy happy eater (OT recommendation)
& now the baby whisperer!
currently reading ‘the out of sync child’ for my kiddo with sensory needs