June 2019 Moms
gta4334
member
OBGYN/Midwife/Doctor Issues or Concerns
gta4334
member
Hi All,
Just wondering if anyone has run into any issues with their OB/Midwives/Dula's (basically, the medical professionals guiding you through your pregnancy) and wanted to create a thread to post any experiences and give advice.
Thanks!
Just wondering if anyone has run into any issues with their OB/Midwives/Dula's (basically, the medical professionals guiding you through your pregnancy) and wanted to create a thread to post any experiences and give advice.
Thanks!
Re: OBGYN/Midwife/Doctor Issues or Concerns
I went to my OB (small father/son practice) for last appointment. The son, my main OB, wheeled in on a scooter-board knee support thingy--he had blown out his ACL since I saw him last. In small talk I just asked him what his recovery was like and how long he'd be on the scooter.
He tells me that he has to scoot for a few weeks and then ultimately have surgery that "will put him out for 6-8 weeks". Okay so here's my issue...how hard do I ask for details on when this surgery is and what I can expect as his patient?
I have been with his practice for a while. They delivered my first son and I know his father, the other partner in the practice, but I don't love his father's "style". The father actually ended up delivering my son because of how they rotate on-call schedules and it was fine, but I would much prefer to go the whole pregnancy with my doc instead of with the father/other doc. I don't know that I would really change practices if I have to switch docs,but I'd like to know what to expect. Will his surgery put him out when I'm due to go in labor? Will his surgery put him out during the last stages of my pregnancy and then he'll be back for the labor? Just a lot of questions and I feel a little odd prying into his own medical history but at the same time, it clearly impacts my own medical decisions and my pregnancy.
Do I wait for him to tell me more about the impact? I feel like I should be more proactive. If I need to change, I should do it sooner rather than later. How hard do I push for answers? Am I weird to be a little put off by this?
And I realized as I re-read I mis-spoke, he blew out his Achilles (not his ACL--I've done the ACL myself and while a pain, I think Achilles recovery and surgery is worse).
Anyway, I feel like I need to know more and I need to make sure I'm prepared to push back if he is vague.
So thank you all, ladies
Things like the ladies above have said but you can tailor it to talking to admin:
”hello I had an appointment with DrX a few days ago and he mentioned his Achilles surgery will make him unavailable for 6-8 weeks but he wasn’t sure when this was going to be. I’m just wondering if he knows when that is yet so I can get in early and pre-book appointments around this time if it’s during my pregnancy”
That’s the approach I’d take!
FWIW, we had a kid blow his Achilles in early November (I think) and he just took his first steps last week. Obviously your doc doesn't need to be in basketball shape to deliver your kid, but it's definitely not an easy recovery process and will take a while. That said, if it just happened AND he's pretty diligent in his PT, he could very well still be back to deliver your baby like nothing ever happened.
Also, what are some things that you STM+ have seen that would be considered warning signs of a hospital’s lack of care/concern for you and your baby? How did you even PICK a hospital/birthing center/etc?
eta: if this isn’t the right place PLEASE show me where to post this q. Thanks!
When interviewing for care providers I interviewed with a OB/gyn and also an OB/GP. The ob/gyn practice gave me a little sheet I had to sign which pretty much said that if you go into labour on a weekend then you wouldn’t get your primary carer, you’d get whichever gyno is on call. My OB on the other hand said he’d be there for the birth but if there were any complications and I couldn’t deliver vaginally or needed to be cut then the on-call gyno at the hospital I go to would be called in to assist.
As for hospital, I’d ask around to see people’s experiences of the hospitals near you. When I told people at work I was pregnant they all immediately told me which hospital not to go to. If you don’t have anybody to ask maybe think about what’s important to you and find a hospital that ticks the most boxes?
As for hospital I just picked a hospital close to my house. I live in the country so there are not really that many choices. I did switch hospitals for this pregnancy though.
thats all the way I do things though.... everyone has their own priorities and so luckily there are a variety of safe environments in which to give birth!
This time around, I'm more of an advocate for myself, so I'm not doing a baby friendly hospital because I feel like I can put all those details in my birth plan. Also I like that this place is newer and closer to our house.
I Google search hospitals and look for malpractice and infant mortality rates. I am a Mil spouse and the hospital i was supposed to go to has some issues and things I didnt agree with. And plus,this came out a few months later, https://amp.actionnewsjax.com/news/local/employee-accused-of-mishandling-babies-at-jacksonville-hospital-sorry-for-offending/611642763
So to do this, he uses a leg extension that basically connects to his knee so that the surgery can heal and he can still work. He's got a pirate peg leg/half a stilt. My face must have been a little weary because he told me, "Oh don't worry, I've already delivered 22 babies on the peg leg, I'm a pro now and I'll be even better at it by June."
I must say I'm quite relieved. I really wasn't looking forward to trying to find a new doctor or transitioning practices. Woo Hoo!
I’d ring the teaching hospital or the doctor’s that you’d be going to and explain your situation and see if they’re willing to take you on 🙂
I’m a FTM as well so don’t have much experience with hospitals/OB’s/switching - but I DO have experience listening to my gut extinct and it sounds like what you’re doing.
Who knows - maybe you’ll tour another hospital and find that you actually liked the first one after all? Or maybe you’ll realize that your gut was right and the grass is way greener elsewhere!
I’ve actually got plans to change hospitals and docs - and though I don’t know when I’ll do it, I’m reassured by a friend who made the exact same switch at 6 months pregnant.
My inkling to switch is because I’ve decided that I want a water birth if possible, after learning more about hospital/birth practices through reading/etc.
The hospital I’m currently at doesn’t offer water birth OR midwives - which I’d much prefer to an OB.
(Has anyone here seen the “Business of Being Born” btw?)
It’s a real headache and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t overwhelmed with the red tape of pregnancy (insurance, researching appointments, trying to educate myself before I’m told what I want by someone else, etc.)
It’s a lot but I have faith in us :-)
i do think a hospital is a hospital and wouldn’t get too hung up on more “luxury” type amenities (like how nice/big the bathroom is in the postpartum room or what color the sheets are) because it’s all going to be a little uncomfortable and not as nice as home. But since you aren’t in love with your doctors as it is I don’t see the harm in looking around!
I am in NYC and the majority of rooms are room shares (it's a space situation). You can pay for an upgrade and my husband and I did that with our son and did not regret it for a minute (even at $600/night). We weren't able to switch to a private room right after delivery though because everything was full so we did room share the first night and the bulk of the following day. My husband was allowed to stay with us and he actually got in bed with me instead of sitting upright in a small chair all night (hospital beds are pretty large after all). I don't recall it being so terrible. The woman we shared with was fine, I never saw her or introduced myself. We always kept the dividers up. But one thing is we didn't have visitors from our choice. If we were planning on visitors that first night or following day it would have been pretty tight. She had a few people come but it's not like I saw them or they invaded my space/privacy. If they hadn't had a room become available would it have been terrible? No. Would it have been ideal? Of course not. But in the end it was a small portion of our experience and it didn't make or break the delivery or birthing experience.
I don't say this to discourage finding a place that has a policy you feel good about, just to say that if it doesn't work out, don't make that be the end-all be-all, defining point about your birth story. It's so much more than just where you stay post-delivery. That's all I mean to say.
And @wiseh I did contact the midwives attached to the larger hospital they said they take women no matter how far along you are because they believe women should have the birth experience they want. She suggested that I come to "Meet the Midwives" in February which they also tour the hospital and if comfortable or if I want to set up a consult for a more one on one meeting that that is also an option. So my plan is to get my anatomy scan, attend meet the midwives and tour and set up an appointment for the following week with the midwives. If I'm comfortable after the meetig/tour I'll keep the appointment and if not I can always cancel and stick where I am.
Thank you for all the support and advice ladies!! 💕
- Are ultrasounds really that expensive?
- Should I just go ahead with the potential $1000 anatomy scan at a Tier 2 hospital?
- I have never been to a hospital for any inpatient/outpatient services. Is it normal to have 2 bills for a single visit, one for the ultrasound and one for the "hospital radiology center"
First, I’m sorry you’ve even got to go through this.
But know that you’re not alone - I’m doing a similar dance over here in CA - I received a $600 bill for the first half of a genetic test that I mistakingly thought was NOT elective, and it’s one of many billing surprises of this pregnancy.
Who knew having a baby could be so expensive?? (Apparently lots of people because I started looking it up.)
Regardless, sounds like you’re in a time sensitive pickle.
This is somewhat generic advice, but I’d start with calling your insurance ASAP and asking them to help you find an in-network clinic that won’t bankrupt you.
I would also get clarification about when your annual billing year starts and ends - is it Jan-December? I ask because - depending on the cost of delivery - you might just hit your out of pocket max inevitably this year. (If you have an OOP Max, that is.)
Every plan is different, but if you do have a max out of pocket amount, and it’s one you’re going to hit with costs of childbirth anyway, it might alleviate some of the pressure from you in the moment - even though 4K is a lot to pay :-(
However this goes, I’m wishing you the best of luck navigating insurance and research and appointments. You’re busy making a human being and shouldn’t be worrying about this stuff. But, alas, the bills that do not kill us make us want to kill our insurance companies. (Or something inspirational like that.)
xx
what state are you from/moving to. I'm glad I'm not the only aussie on the board. Though it's pretty dead now