Also, I made a guest list for my baby shower since I have to have it in February to ensure my sister from New York can be there. My MIL is trying to force me to invite someone I don’t want to invite. Those woman came to our wedding, but I feel like weddings are far more of a family affair and that baby showers are much more intimate. DH and I rarely see this woman and I just don’t feel like we are close enough to her to invite her. MIL isn’t having it and DH won’t step in the middle. His mother fucking sucks and causes so much tension between DH and I when it comes to things like this. I refuse to cave and invite this woman. Here is the response I’ve constructed. I don’t even care if it doesn’t sound nice at this point. I just want her to take my answer and fucking drop it.
@mrskoz428 is your MIL contributing any $$ or helping plan? If so, let her invite whoever, if not, your note is fine although a little on the aggressive side. You probably already sent it but "please respect our decision" might be a better way to phrase it. My MIL always plays the victim so I try to make it a situation where no fault can be found with me just because she baited me into a reaction. It also helped DH start stepping in earlier since her reactions were so ridiculous to my firm but kind objections to things.
@kvh22 I hadn’t sent it and ended up rewording it. I type things out and sit on it because I know my initial reaction to her is to just be annoyed. She did the same thing during our wedding and we went from 100 to 150 people because of what she wanted. She contributed $40 for the venue. Otherwise, my mom has covered the cost of everything else (close to $300 so far because she’s being super extra but I’m her only child). I let her invite this one person and told her that I would appreciate her respecting my decisions, even if they aren’t her first choice. She is VERY overprotective of everything and I’ve been bullied into doing a lot her way just to avoid conflict and I’m just kind o sick of it, I guess.
My Dad and Sister are driving me to the edge of my sanity.
Earlier in the week, my Dad calls me out of the blue and asks if I could change the hospital I plan on delivering at because "the rest of the family lives out here (long island) and it would make it easier for everyone to come see you." I live in the city. He thought it was totally normal to ask me to give birth at a location more convenient for him and said "you're over the top" when I got upset at his request.
My sister has an 18 month old. She recently bought a house (good for her. we're renting) and is constantly asking when DH and I are buying a house or why we don't have one yet with the baby on the way. A family friend of ours just bought a beautiful home, and my sister started texting me to complain how her house is not nearly as big as our friend's. I just told her that she shouldn't compare herself to other people and that her home is beautiful too. Her response? "Just be my sister and have some compassion for me" - compassion for what?! No one died! It is very frustrating to listen to petty stuff like this and she never asks how I'm doing or feeling. And then she acts shocked when I just stop responding or just say that I'm busy. She also decided to blurt out of the sex of the baby to the rest of the family during christmas dinner even though I asked her to keep it a secret. She's the devil.
Re: Family (Friends) Drama Llama Week of 12/9 - 12/15
Earlier in the week, my Dad calls me out of the blue and asks if I could change the hospital I plan on delivering at because "the rest of the family lives out here (long island) and it would make it easier for everyone to come see you." I live in the city. He thought it was totally normal to ask me to give birth at a location more convenient for him and said "you're over the top" when I got upset at his request.
My sister has an 18 month old. She recently bought a house (good for her. we're renting) and is constantly asking when DH and I are buying a house or why we don't have one yet with the baby on the way. A family friend of ours just bought a beautiful home, and my sister started texting me to complain how her house is not nearly as big as our friend's. I just told her that she shouldn't compare herself to other people and that her home is beautiful too. Her response? "Just be my sister and have some compassion for me" - compassion for what?! No one died! It is very frustrating to listen to petty stuff like this and she never asks how I'm doing or feeling. And then she acts shocked when I just stop responding or just say that I'm busy. She also decided to blurt out of the sex of the baby to the rest of the family during christmas dinner even though I asked her to keep it a secret. She's the devil.