@elmich3- Since becoming a Mom I speak up more than I ever did before. If your MIL doesn't like, oh well. Make sure its not just you and your husband speaks up too, it is HIS mom. Honestly we never have any inlaws watch DD at their house and they always come to ours. Can you tell MIL if she wants to watch the kids to come to you?
@frenchfrymama CONGRATS! we moved to a new city when DD was 7 months old and I had to live without DH during the week while DD and I stayed in a tiny studio. It was ROUGH. Best advice is to start packing now and researching and find some professional movers!
UGH 3 days of house work and of course everything I WANTED done is not finished but I am exhausted. I still have 4 days left till I go back to work so I have plenty of time. For DD's new bathroom I am doing a mermaid theme. I have all the supplies to make a mermaid wall and am about 80% done with the canvas prints I am painting for it.
Me: 32 DH: 31
TTC #2 since January 2018
Baby #1 DD Born 8/25/2016 BFP: 8/11/18 Due: 4/26/18
I pretty much can’t deal with DD today so I’m trading places with DH and he gets the baby for the day while I do the accounting for the business. This is going to be so much better.
@frenchfrymama congrats! I think everyone else has covered the advice. But good luck!
@lyse01 I swear kids can sense when we have the least patience, and thats when they want to be with us and have our attention the most!
We are going to Disneyland on Monday. Pray for me. I know my 4 year old will love it, but I'm not super excited. Vacationing while pregnant just isn't my favorite in general, and I'm pretty sure Disneyland is going to be a total madhouse.
Also, holy crap - does anyone else's child demand literally CONSTANT attention? My 4 year old wants and demands literally constant attention. Over the break I've been trying really hard to teach him to entertain himself. He has a great playroom and I'll set out some toys invitingly, then I'll put on a timer and tell him he needs to play for 15 minutes. Sometimes he has successfully done it. But most of the time he then spends the entire 15 minutes whining, following me around the house, laying on the floor moaning, etc. Im going to freaking lose it. Anyone know how to get a kid to entertain their own damn selves for a few minutes?
Good luck in Disney, @professormama. And no real advice here, this holiday break my 4yo has been driving me bonkers. You would think with all the new toys that he would keep himself entertained, but nope. Instead since his routine is messed up he's all over me or whining for video game time constantly. I'm about ready to pull my hair out.
@professormama DD (20mos) is like that, and I’ve been working so hard to get her to play independently now so she is used to it before baby brother arrives, but I don’t have a lot of hope. She’s so clingy, usually physically needs to be touching me, and drives me nuts. We got her a rocking horse for Christmas which has saved me from being crawled on some. I hope her new toys will help her keep herself more entertained. It’ll be nice that her birthday is a couple weeks before brother is due, so maybe she’ll get some really good, engrossing toys then. So yeah, no advice, just solidarity.
@kangstadt and @HGRich well, I'm sorry you're going through the same thing, although, I guess misery loves company. I find my son does really well with "entertaining himself" if I set him up a detailed activity (like a breakfast invitation from instagram dayswithgray). However, if I expect him to genuinely entertain himself from start to finish, it tends to be a problem. Ugh, well, hopefully we can all work through it. I'm going to keep on persevering with my timer strategy. 20 minutes a day is NOT too much to ask from a 4 year old!
Thank you thank you all for the advice, it’s all super helpful! Hopefully I can tackle everything on my own so I don’t have to pay anyone... but that’s super helpful to know I have that option. Here is to hoping I can survive without him for the next 3 months. We are pretty attached at the hip so I’m not super looking forward to it. BUT so grateful for the opportunity For him!!!
Rough night with FIL’s dementia. We’ve decided he needs to spend at least one night a week at our house as respite for MIL/a safe alternative when he is paranoid. This means my office is going to be turned back into a semi-guest room instead of the dumping ground for all things not DD, and that I need to dementia-proof it as well as toddler-proof. This is going to be an enormous project...and I’m so not looking forward to it. Mostly because it’s going to mean I’m further away from say, getting a laptop set up so I can bring in some income. And I’m not unpacked from any of our three moves in the past 12 months...which I guess is fortunate because I don’t need to move as much around??
@lyse01 I'm sorry, that really sucks. But you're doing something really compassionate for your MIL, giving her a break like that.
Actually having a really nice morning around here. I let my husband sleep in while I got a few little things done around the house and my son ate breakfast. Poor kiddo had an accident in his bed last night around midnight because we'd been lounging in PJs all day yesterday and I totally forgot he was in underwear instead of a pull up. So one task was just getting laundry started! Then we made banana bread muffins, which are currently in the oven. Now I'm settled on the couch with a big cup of coffee and planning to do a little work. At some point I need to pack for tomorrow, but I figure getting my spring courses set up as much as possible will lead to a happier vacation, so it's all in service of the greater good
@lyse01 btw, I was thinking about various rooms of the house doing 'double duty.' Is there a reason why the guest room couldn't also function as an office since your FIL will only be there one night a week? If you had a laptop it wouldn't need to stay in the room when FIL was there, and you could put baby-proofing stuff on the desk drawers to keep him (and them) safe when he was visiting. I'm not sure what all you need in an office, but I usually find that I don't actually need that much, as long as I've got a decent workspace to spread out on and a comfortable chair. This could be a great opportunity / incentive to get everything cleaned up and set up! And desks are usually dirt cheap on craigslist.
@professormama the room will pull multiple duties (as it already does). It’s just currently a disaster with a ton of low shelving that DD loves to pull apart.
I need my 8’ bookcases back from storage so a bunch of paper can be stashed up high when not actively worked on, then to put the Christmas stuff back in storage, convince DH to add storage in the bathroom (currently like 2 cu ft under the sink, total) so our medicine cabinet doesn’t have to live on top of the bed, move the stuff that over the summer was Airbnb guest supplies to storage in the basement (and probably the open concept furniture that holds it too), find a place for DH’s clothing so it doesn’t end up everywhere (lost cause), create storage for FIL’s overnight things, and somehow get DD to not dive into the trash cans at every opportunity so we can take baby gates down and FIL has unimpeded access to the bathroom.
My requirements for an office are basically a large desk to put piles of paper on that won’t be disturbed by anyone else, plus a computer and a few drawers of office supplies/files (eg stamps, envelopes, notecards, pens, records, long term projects). FIL tends to find a paper bag and go through his desk, then throw important things away “because he has multiple copies” and I would not put it past him to do the same with my stuff, so I guess I need a locking filing cabinet for records.
This is actually helpful for thinking through how to attack the problem
@professormama good luck at Disney! We have annual passes but are blocked out until the 2nd week of Jan which I'm okay with because I know it's super busy
I made the mistake of joining a fb pregnancy group. So sick of the humble brag posts: "I'm 22 weeks and haven't gained any weight!" "What I feed my picky toddler: apples, avocadoes, carrots and pb toast"
@booksandlace what I feed my picky toddler =mac n cheese, pb, pizza, chicken nuggets, sausage, cheese burger, pancakes....repeat. and at almost 3 y.o. she still prefers pureed fruit and veggie pouches so we slides those in at each meal but pretty sure pedi will object at next appt that she won't eat actual food
@tmblickley@booksandlace my kid would live off of straight peanut butter if we let her. Like eat it out a bowl, no extras needed. If we manage to get some apple or carrot or cheese into her I’m happy.
this is my backup acct. prevously helloblueeyes
Me:32 DH:33 Married:04/2012 DD:07/2014 BFP 8/14/2018 #2 due 4/18/2019
So I promise I’m alive! Christmas was nuts and then DH aunt passed away so I’m just now coming up to breathe. The services should be later this week. I’m really sorry I’ve been MIA!
@professormama my DD needs constant attention too. I can’t leave the living room without her following me. It’s frustrating. Can I get a glass of water without a shadow?!
Re: Randoms 12/26
@frenchfrymama CONGRATS! we moved to a new city when DD was 7 months old and I had to live without DH during the week while DD and I stayed in a tiny studio. It was ROUGH. Best advice is to start packing now and researching and find some professional movers!
UGH 3 days of house work and of course everything I WANTED done is not finished but I am exhausted. I still have 4 days left till I go back to work so I have plenty of time. For DD's new bathroom I am doing a mermaid theme. I have all the supplies to make a mermaid wall and am about 80% done with the canvas prints I am painting for it.
BFP: 8/11/18 Due: 4/26/18
@lyse01 I swear kids can sense when we have the least patience, and thats when they want to be with us and have our attention the most!
We are going to Disneyland on Monday. Pray for me. I know my 4 year old will love it, but I'm not super excited. Vacationing while pregnant just isn't my favorite in general, and I'm pretty sure Disneyland is going to be a total madhouse.
Actually having a really nice morning around here. I let my husband sleep in while I got a few little things done around the house and my son ate breakfast. Poor kiddo had an accident in his bed last night around midnight because we'd been lounging in PJs all day yesterday and I totally forgot he was in underwear instead of a pull up. So one task was just getting laundry started! Then we made banana bread muffins, which are currently in the oven. Now I'm settled on the couch with a big cup of coffee and planning to do a little work. At some point I need to pack for tomorrow, but I figure getting my spring courses set up as much as possible will lead to a happier vacation, so it's all in service of the greater good
I need my 8’ bookcases back from storage so a bunch of paper can be stashed up high when not actively worked on, then to put the Christmas stuff back in storage, convince DH to add storage in the bathroom (currently like 2 cu ft under the sink, total) so our medicine cabinet doesn’t have to live on top of the bed, move the stuff that over the summer was Airbnb guest supplies to storage in the basement (and probably the open concept furniture that holds it too), find a place for DH’s clothing so it doesn’t end up everywhere (lost cause), create storage for FIL’s overnight things, and somehow get DD to not dive into the trash cans at every opportunity so we can take baby gates down and FIL has unimpeded access to the bathroom.
My requirements for an office are basically a large desk to put piles of paper on that won’t be disturbed by anyone else, plus a computer and a few drawers of office supplies/files (eg stamps, envelopes, notecards, pens, records, long term projects). FIL tends to find a paper bag and go through his desk, then throw important things away “because he has multiple copies” and I would not put it past him to do the same with my stuff, so I guess I need a locking filing cabinet for records.
This is actually helpful for thinking through how to attack the problem
I made the mistake of joining a fb pregnancy group. So sick of the humble brag posts: "I'm 22 weeks and haven't gained any weight!" "What I feed my picky toddler: apples, avocadoes, carrots and pb toast"
prevously helloblueeyes
Me:32 DH:33 Married:04/2012 DD:07/2014
BFP 8/14/2018 #2 due 4/18/2019
@professormama my DD needs constant attention too. I can’t leave the living room without her following me. It’s frustrating. Can I get a glass of water without a shadow?!