STM+ Check In Week of 10/23

kvh22 · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages?

How are your other kids doing this week?

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them?

mrsdee15 · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages? DD is 1.

How are your other kids doing this week? She's fine, she's just grumpy! I think it's the teething. She's also mad we're weaning down her bottle time and upping sippy cup time. I may have mentioned this, she uses her bottle as a pacifier, so she is none too thrilled for this change.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Did you do anything to prepare your first for a second baby? I've read that for younger kids, getting a doll for them may help - I'm not sure how much we need to do to prepare her.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? She's just getting started with solids, so I think right now it's more that I don't give her many (processed) sweets because I want her to eat her healthy food. Oh, but we were trying to get her to eat bananas for the vitamins - I don't like bananas, and it turns out she doesn't care for them either. Dog got his fill of them while DD would stare us in the eye as she threw it off her tray.

eatinwatermelonseeds · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages? One, 4

How are your other kids doing this week?
He's doing great. He has the week off from preschool, which was terrible for my schedule, but he really needed it. I could tell he was getting burnt out.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I'm concerned about how he's going to do when the baby comes, but as of right now he's just SO excited. He'll make me put my shirt up so he can rest his hand on my belly and "see the baby." It's mostly cheeseburger right now, but it's cute.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them?

Pureed baby food was nasty, but now he's a super picky eater and most of the things I don't like don't really have nutritional value anyway.

elliebo · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages? 1 daughter, age 4

How are your other kids doing this week?
Good...she tells everyone there’s a baby in my tummy, including strangers lol

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?
I’m wondering if I should try picking up the heartbeat on my Doppler but I don’t want to freak out if I can’t find it. It was just so comforting last time to make sure she was still ticking away in there. I’m going on Monday for NIPT, and it’s so weird to me that I’ll be able to know the sex of the baby so soon. Last time I had to wait until the 20 week anatomy scan. It’ll be crazy to have a name for this tiny stranger before I even feel it move.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? I mean, can I say breastmilk? Because breastmilk. Ftr I mean when she was a baby...my 4 year old does not still drink breastmilk

lovelybabybumpz · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages? DD is 2.

How are your other kids doing this week? Tiring. I'm tired of having to put every single morsel of food in her body. Like she can't just sit down and eat her dinner. I have to coax and prod her into taking bites. She's also very demanding. "Sit sit!" is her favorite phrase and she forces me to sit at her little table with her. Which would be ok, if it got her to stay and focus. But then she just runs off and abandons me. Rude.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? The dinner stuggles. The listening struggles. 'DD come here.' 'no.' 'DD please come here. I need to x y z. Change your diaper, put your pants on, give you a hug.' 'no' So darn stubborn, it's kiling me and DH right now.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them?
I like most food. And I try not to feed her things that I wouldn't eat in the first place. Although at first, I would give her unseasoned vegetables and I won't eat unseasoned vegetables. She had some mushrooms the other day, and they are the one food I don't care for.

mcewen3 · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages? 2 girls, ages 5 & 3

How are your other kids doing this week? Really good. DD1 started coming down with a cold on Sunday, but I've been pumping her full of fluids and the max dose of an herbal cold syrup we use and it really seems to have warded it off. Still a bit of a runny nose today, but normally it would have materialized into more. Otherwise everyone is good, winter activities are in full swing and DD2 is so excited that she is old enough to skate this year.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? We haven't told the girls about the baby yet, but I did bring it up hypothetically last week. They are both so excited, which was a huge relief. After my older brother came to visit with his barely 1 y/o this summer DD2, who is the baby lover, adamantly told everyone that she DID NOT want a baby brother or sister. And my nephew is pretty much the most chill baby on the planet, so there wasn't much not to like.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? Not really. There's not too much I don't like, and especially at their age I'm not making different meals for everybody. I do feed them plenty of things DH doesn't like though. In particular, he hates avocado and I feed them avocado all the time. But DD1 has started to pick up on it and she recently announced that she doesn't like avocado and now refuses to eat it, so I'm working on that

megsb615 · October 2018

@lovelybabybumpz I feel like I could have written your post myself. DS is 2, and the exact same way. Dinner is a struggle every night because all he wants to do is play. He’s also stubborn (and bossy). It’s exhausting. Makes me feel a little better to know I’m not alone in the struggle.

How many kids do you have? Ages? 1 DS. 2 years old.

How are your other kids doing this week? Like I mentioned above, exhausting. I’m not sure if he’s still feeling bad from his ear infection (he’s been on antibiotics since Wednesday) or what his deal is, but it’s rough. He had a full blown tantrum over not getting to keep playing in the sink after we were finished rinsing off dishes to put in the dishwasher. I don’t have the energy to deal with all that. He’s also gotten an attitude and swats at us when he gets mad, and I can’t stand it. He gets his feelings hurt when we tell him go sit in his chair and calm down, but I don’t know what else to do when he’s all worked up and acting ugly.

Rants/Raves: Just my tiny tornado of a child. He’s like a sour patch kid. He can be so sweet when he’ll say good job mama or you pretty mama, but then, he can also be such a spoiled brat. The whining and tantrums and waking up at night is so frustrating. Sometimes I feel like we’re a little crazy for having another one. 😳

GTKY: I’ll get him the Stoneyfield organic beets and strawberry yogurt, which sounds gross to me, but he loves it. Other than that, I usually eat his food more than he does since we can never get him to sit down long enough to eat. The Perdue chicken nuggets are pretty dang good! 🤷🏼‍♀️

DuchessOfCambridge · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages?
11 mo DS

How are your other kids doing this week?
Hes doing great! So active. Loves practicing pulling to stand. Very opinionated now though, he yelled at me so many times at Target 😐

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?
I wish there was some magic way to keep him from whining loudly in public. Food works but he gets mad as soon as he swallows. I’m sure this is just a kid thing though.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them?
LOTS. He’s not at all picky (for now) and eats pretty much everything. I think riced cauliflower is gross, he loves loves loves it. We mix it with riced broccoli too and sometimes a side of riced butternut squash and riced beets. I HATE beets. In case you can’t tell, I’m super lazy. It’s just too easy - they’re $3/bag and last us for like three weeks of meals! I also make him have pouches that have kale in them. I won’t eat kale. But he loves it.

MaggieG183 · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages?
DS, almost 2.

How are your other kids doing this week? He’s so so so sweet! He’s so happy daddy is home and he’s been giving everyone and the puppy hugs.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I’m wondering how to make the potty training this happen. He’s certainly interested but every time I bring up sitting on the potty or whatever else, he kind of tweaks out. Suggestions? And I’ll totally echo @mrsdee15 ...what should I be doing to prep DS?

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? I’m not a huge scrambled egg fan. It’s the only way DS will eat eggs though, but he’ll never eat them if I make them, just when DH does. Kind of saves me a bit.

lovelybabybumpz · October 2018

@megsb615
She is the sweetest of sweet, but even well behaved kids are just exhausting. It's like a long-term mental mindf&ck. And she hasn't even started with the huge tantrums yet. Oh I can't wait.
Hugs! We're all in it together

Stormiewinter · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages?
2 boys, 5 and 2.5

How are your other kids doing this week?
Ds1 has been pretty good, but ds2 hss definitely been a handful. Not being able to pick him up is so difficult since he can be pretty naughty. He never wants to hold my hand and will try to run away or will dive forward so I have to let go. This is definitely a challenging stage.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?
The fatigue has been really bad this week! 815 and I can barely keep my eyes open.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? There are definitely things I wouldn’t eat as a kid, that the boys eat. But I don’t think I am that picky now, and the boys are both pretty good about eating healthy food.

k2k2tog · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages? DD1 - 4; DD2 - 2

How are your other kids doing this week? They're great. So busy. They had a sleepover with their grandparents on the weekend and it was exactly what DH and I needed.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I'm just going to brag for a moment. It's DD1's costume day at school tomorrow. She wants to be a mermaid. So, I pinterested it and spent all evening making a fancy sparkly mermaid tutu. We'll see for sure tomorrow when DD puts in on, but I think it's a Pinterest win and I'm just a little proud of myself.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? DD1 is a super picky eater. Sometimes I'll pack cucumbers or peppers in her lunch in the hopes that she might actually eat a couple. But I like those things, so that doesn't actually answer the question. There isn't much that I don't like. Whipped cream and I would never force my child to eat it - but she likes whipped cream, so...

DuchessOfCambridge · October 2018

@k2k2tog I think whipped cream is disgusting. You are my people.

mcewen3 · October 2018

I like real whipped cream, with very little sugar. Or whipped coconut cream 😋 But Cool Whip or any of the aerosols? 🤢

DressageDarling · October 2018

How many kids do you already have? Ages? DS who is 2

How are your other kids doing this week? I think he might be getting sick. He has not been sleeping well and had an absolute melt down during tumbling today (which involved him screaming at the instructor). Thankfully, he went to bed quickly so I’m hoping tonight and tomorrow goes better.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I was feeling pretty burnt out last week and ended up with a really bad migraine on Friday so DH stayed home. I slept almost the whole day and have been feeling much better since.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? DS has eating issues, so I offer him things I don’t like (Bell Peppers mainly), but we don’t make him eat anything he doesn’t want to.

brie_and_almonds · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge Everyone gets at least one super naughty trip to the store. We will all probably be there (again) some day. My worst time was about 6 months ago when DH was out of town and DD1 (age 5.. definitely old enough to know better) sat down on the floor in the store and refused to move. I eventually had to pick her up and put her in the big part of the cart, still whining and wailing, because we could not leave without getting toilet paper.

knottie0d8cc4d43bacc09f · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge Oh girl I feel you. And why is it that the store is dead silent when your LO has a fit? Then EVERYONE stares. @brie_and_almonds That picture is priceless! I'm nervous for the day I can't just pick up DD and take her where I want/need.

How many kids do you already have? Ages? 1 DD, 15 months

How are your other kids doing this week? She's doing well! We are still in the 2-1 nap transition...she's been sleeping 12-1 and then going to bed at 6:30. Before, each nap was 1.5 hours and bed at 7:30. I feel bad MH gets home from work right around 6:30 so he barely sees her before she's asleep. Hopefully her one nap starts lengthening.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I'm starting to think about childcare when baby #2 arrives. My mom currently watches DD all week, but I really don't think she can handle 2 kids at the same time. Plus, my grandmother lives with my parents so that is another person to care for. Thinking about hiring a nanny/mother's helper to stay with my mom during the day for another set of hands. Either that, or DD goes into daycare for a few days a week. Trying to decide what would be best for all.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? This girl is OBSESSED with food. To the point where I was worried and brought it up at her most recent appointment. She whines the entire time you're prepping her meal, then if she's done and someone else is still eating, she's pointing at their plate like "MINE". I guess I should be grateful she literally eats anything right now...I'm sure that will change when she hits the 2 year mark!

k2k2tog · October 2018

@DuchessofCambridge YAAASSS!!! Whenever I tell someone that I don't like whipped cream, they look at me like I have two heads. I don't know why. That sh*t is disgusting.

bluesky24 · October 2018

@k2k2tog @DuchessOfCambridge wait - even homemade whipped cream?! I made so much of it last year for Thanksgiving and hardly anyone had any, so I froze it in individual portions and ate it all. the. time.

@megsb615 @lovelybabybumpz solidarity to all other moms of 2 year olds. exhausting.

How many kids do you already have? Ages? 1 DD, 2 y/o

How are your other kids doing this week? She's been pretty sweet this week. Except for the meltdowns over wanting to watch TV or videos on my phone. For the record, I'm cool with a little bit of screentime - a few hours a week is a-OK with me. But it's not on demand. But we finally got her to take baths again without having a major tantrum and screaming the whole time, so HALLELUJAH. That was hard.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Just trying to enjoy a quieter week. Last night, DD went to sleep at 7:30, and DH and I had several hours to hang out before we went to bed, I did wonder quietly to myself - why on earth are we doing this again?! But then we watched last week's Shark Tank (anyone else watch?) One of the businesses was by three siblings who had lost both of their parents to cancer. Of course DH and I are both crying - and that's why you give them siblings, to (hopefully) have someone to face the world with. I will need lots of reminders of that come next summer but it helped.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? Not really...my DD loves blueberries which I could mostly do without. But for the most part, we eat together as a family so we eat all the same things.

aels12 · October 2018

@k2k2tog and @DuchessOfCambridge agreed, whipped cream is gross!

DuchessOfCambridge · October 2018

@bluesky24 even homemade whipped cream. We rarely do screentime mostly because I hate having TV on unless I'm actively watching it. We are not a background TV family. Usually I let him if he won't leave me alone so I can just eat breakfast

@brie_and_almonds I'm nervous because I feel like at 11 months I already don't know how to handle it. I turned the stroller around and was like "can you not?" but he's a baby.

What age do babies get spoiled? I keep wondering if he's spoiled since like, I don't really challenge him with too many things...I make him go places and do things when I want to but at home it's not as though I'm like, nope you can't play with that because I want to haha. I'm really glad he's getting a sibling. I also thought at this age they were too young to be spoiled. Idk. Every day is a new adventure.

knottie0d8cc4d43bacc09f · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge I feel like it's less about being spoiled and more about starting to exert their independence at this age. I've really been trying to work on DD (15 months) and her patience. She wants everything INSTANTLY. We try taking turns with a toy so she gets a turn and then watches while I "play" with it. I can definitely see her starting to test limits and boundaries to see if I'll give in. It's tough.

kvh22 · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge I mean, an only child is an only child and there's nothing you can do about it. At daycare, DD is the youngest (people stay home with their children longer here so they keep adding kids older than her lol) at 14 months. One girl who just started is 15 months but everyone else is older so when I pick her up I hear them say "(kid's name), no, she was playing with that. She's a baby, you can't take it from her" and it makes me worried she's coddled there. She's currently going through leap 9 and from what I've read it seems like now (14-15 months) is when they start to get manipulative which is my bigger concern. Up to this point, it's basically keep them happy if possible. She freaks out if we take something out of her hand but is easily distracted with something else.

DuchessOfCambridge · October 2018

@kvh22 he doesn't freak out if I take anything from him, it's just the whining in public that I'm like STOP YELLING AT ME IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE PLEASE but obviously not in all caps because people would think I was psycho. I do hear the "he was playing with that, don't take it from him" a lot with DS and I'm like no! Take away!

bluesky24 · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge I think, to @secicc12's point, it's just them asserting their independence and doing things because they can. You won't spoil your kid, I feel like that kind of thing comes much, much later. They're just trying to do new things because they can, not because you let them do whatever they want.

mcewen3 · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge I don’t think there really is a set age where kids can start to be spoiled. That said, it certainly doesn’t sound like you are spoiling him either. Developing their voice and saying how they feel are just par for the course, and really what we ultimately want them to do. With time you will be able to teach him that there are more appropriate ways of asserting himself in public, but for now it’s just one of those jumps to get over. I remember when my girls were little there were times of day that I found to be easier to run errands, shop, etc with them vs other times. Is there maybe a certain time of day that he’s happier and more agreeable that you could plan to do your shopping during that window for a while? I know that for me, adjusting my schedule a bit, especially during developmental leaps, just made life a bit less stressful.

DuchessOfCambridge · October 2018

Thank you for the reassurance ladies

It's hard sometimes to know if what I'm doing is right. He is usually happier if he's fed, clean diapered, and just had a nap but I can't always plan around naps. That's really just me being selfish - if we're already out, I just want to get everything done, going home and taking him in/out in between is such a process. He will car nap but it's not as good as his real naps.

kvh22 · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge we went to a halloween parade with some mom friends from my mom's group (kiddos ages 14-16 months. Between the parade and the lunch, every one of them threw a tantrum. They don't know how to deal with their emotions right now and can't communicate well yet. It might be embarassing but anyone whose had kids knows how it goes and no one is left unscathed.

@secicc12 I think we have too many toys for her to care if I did that

If I pick something up to play with she starts playing with me with other toys. I'm super impressed, though. I don't think she'd just watch me play with something although she doesn't try to take what I'm playing with either. I'm just waiting for there to be a younger baby at daycare so she can learn, both for her development but also to prepare for this sibling. I'm not looking forward to the nap transition. Daycare gets her to do one nap and has since before she was 1 but we just can't at home.

@k2k2tog that costume sounds awesome! Great work

I'm definitely a "buy" costume person. I can sew but blankets and pillows, not clothes - aside from a button

@MaggieG183 @mrsdee15 I haven't really thought about trying to prepare DD. I'm hoping that daycare gets a baby before I have this LO. I do have a doll for her but she's a bit young to get the difference between that and her penguin or bear stuffed animals.

How many kids do you already have? Ages? DD is 14 months

How are your other kids doing this week? She's good, although sleep is a bit rough, still. DH has a system down where he lies down in bed next to the crib (it's still a "guest room" in theory) and will end up sleeping in there half the night if he falls asleep which is pretty funny. This is apparently normal for this leap (wanting to be close to parents) so definitely not going to make a habit of this once she's out of it.

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I'm not sure I'll be ready to tell people about this pregnancy until the anatomy scan due to risks with the SCH but I also don't think I can hide it that long as a STM. Thoughts on how long we owe work to tell them? I told after our NT scan last time (same company, same boss whose great). I'll be off for 4-6 months so they hired a part time contractor as backfill last time (she was full-time and covering for someone else out on maternity leave on our broader team as well). I work from home most of the time so could probably hide it for a while but idk that I can until 18-20 weeks. I just don't want a lot of people to know in case something happens.

GTKY: Is there a food that you think is really gross but you make your kids eat it because it’s good for them? I really dislike broccoli but put it in stir frys and such. Definitely try to get DD to eat it. She actually does alright with brussels sprouts and stuff like that which is nice, but I love brussels sprouts when cooked properly (i.e. crispy).

DuchessOfCambridge · October 2018

@kvh22 legally, you owe work nothing. You just have to tell them at some point if you want to take maternity leave but since it's your personal medical info, you get to decide when that is, even if it annoys them. I think it's totally fine to wait until your A/S if you want to. But - I totally get the anxiety around that, first time around I ended up telling my boss early because I threw up a few times during work and didn't want her to think I was just taking fun breaks and she pushed me to tell our director at 12 weeks and I wasn't quite ready

bluesky24 · October 2018

@kvh22 I've had the same question about when to inform work this time around, too. I'm still working at the same (great) company but during my last pregnancy, I was in the office fulltime. Now I am remote too, so I can hide it for way longer. I'm going up to visit the office in November for three days - really nervous about hiding it then, but the whole reason I'm going is because my manager will be on three weeks PTO so I don't really want to tell anyone without telling her first. She is leaving this weekend, and I'm not quite 11 weeks yet so it's still too early for me to feel comfortable.

I think you wait until you're ready, you'll know. Even if it's 20 weeks, that gives them 20 more to prepare, which is PLENTY!

mcewen3 · October 2018

@DuchessOfCambridge it totally sucks, but I found with both girls once they reached a certain age (I honestly can't remember exactly which age, but I feel like it was around the same time we switched from bucket to convertible seat so 7ish months) I had to start planning our day around nap time. It was often inconvenient, and so many of my friends kids were more flexible so they didn't always understand, but for my kids nap time and bedtime are two critical elements to keep consistent otherwise they were just totally out of it. They are 5 & 3 now, neither one naps but bedtime is still pretty important. As they've gotten older we've been able to be a bit more lenient on special occasions, but not often. They don't sleep in even if they stay up late, so the day after a late night is usually a write off.

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