Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Product spotlight: Diapering
It worked fine but, meh. A closed trash can works and like others have said, if you’re breastfeeding it won’t stink for a long while. The really stinky ones went into ziplocks and/or straight to the outside can.
Married: 2012
BFP #1 Sept 2014, MMC Dec 2014 | BFP #2 May 2015, DD Jan 2016
It is nice that DD can’t really get into it, unlike a regular step kid trash can. It makes it easier to leave in her room now that she’s in a big girl bed.
I’d love to switch to cloth diapering but am scarred from my youth with many younger siblings in cloth diapers, lol. That was a lot of work & a lot of smell. I will look into making the switch this time because it’s so much more affordable, better for the environment, & I’ve frequently heard an urban legend that CD babies don’t get diaper rash.
We returned our Diaper Genie. Waste of money. Dirty diapers get tossed with the trash daily. (Even worse for the environment. Gah...)
My daughter has definitely got rash in cloth. It clears up fine with a CD-safe rash cream, but she has gotten them in CD, including one bad one that took days to clear up fully.
She's never gotten lots of rashes whether in CD or in disposables, maybe once every 4 weeks or so? It's hard to compare because we use cloth more than disposables, of course, but I'd say our incidence rate is slightly higher with cloth.
This may also depend on what is considered diaper rash. Anytime she gets a little bit red and I put rash cream on, I call that a rash. The really bad one I mentioned, her skin actually got raw and took days to clear up. All the other "rashes" were only reddish skin on various areas of her bottom, and they cleared up within one or two diaper changes, meaning I only put cream on once or twice before it was gone.
Currently our only alternative to a diaper pail is a lidless trashcan inside the kitchen island cabinet so I definitely do not think throwing stinky diapers in there is a good idea. We will have to get SOMETHING even if it is a separate trash can (which depending on the quality, can be just as expensive as diaper pails). I do not want to have to take the trash outside daily. As is (though fully recognizing our trash will increase with the addition of a new human) we take the trash out once a week or twice a week max.
Because you can immediately tell when they wet in cloth and since I changed so often I think that helped too. My kids rarely had to "sit in it" for very long. When I needed to use disposables I was just used to changing them right away, I think my sisters thought I was nuts. Whatever!
[spoiler=TW in signature]
Me: 36, DH 37.
August 2014- 6w MMC
July 2015- CP
PCOS, plus some medical issues that make me high risk.
Our rainbow babies are due 3/21!!!!!
[/spoiler]
ETA: some articles I could find now:
https://www.thenewstribune.com/news/local/article223578715.html
https://www.ktvz.com/news/-flushable-wipes-aren-t-really-so-experts-say/970172339
"Infant and childhood food allergy has now been linked to a mix of environmental and genetic factors that must coexist to trigger the allergy, reports a new study. Those factors include genetics that alter skin absorbency, use of infant cleansing wipes that leave soap on the skin, skin exposure to allergens in dust and skin exposure to food from those providing infant care. The good news is factors leading to food allergy can be modified in the home environment." - https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/04/180406085504.htm
Anyways, I'm not posting this to scare anybody and I just thought it was really interesting! Most parents use wipes and most children don't have severe allergies so it's probably not a huge concern. Food allergies run in my family (my aunt and cousin have severe peanut allergies and my mom has lots of food sensitivities) so after reading this article, I decided I'd try using cloth wipes as much as possible that don't leave residue on the skin and try to make sure my hands are clean before changing diapers!
[spoiler=TW in signature]
Me: 36, DH 37.
August 2014- 6w MMC
July 2015- CP
PCOS, plus some medical issues that make me high risk.
Our rainbow babies are due 3/21!!!!!
[/spoiler]
We also do cloth wipes. I find it easier with cloth diapers anyway (no need to find a garbage), but additionally disposable ones always make my kids more red rather than less. My SIL recently switched to plain water wipes (no cloth for her
For those who cloth diaper. Did you or are you going to cloth diaper right after the hospital, after the stump falls off? Wait until they fit OS? I want to do covers with flats / prefolds. Trying to decide with a tiny lo ( we're in the 2nd percentile) if I need newborn size covers. What brands of newborn covers did you like and where did you get them from?
I plan to cloth diaper DD2 but will probably wait a while again. I used mostly Flip covers and prefolds last time, which I still have. I also have a few Bum Genuis AIOs. Both fit newborn up to toddler. They have snaps that fold them down to make them smaller or bigger.
I bought most of mine online at discounted prices through cottonbabies.com They have frequent sales.
We used Thirsties Duos covers, which are essentially a larger "one-size" and a smaller "one-size" and fitteds I sewed that went with them, again with the two sizes. I also had a larger baby, over 8.5 pounds. Never had any issues. I imagine a regular one size would be pretty big though, thinking about how the larger size of the Duos are.
Anyway, I have 1 newborn cover (thirsties), 4 x-small cover (thirsties), 1 bummies x-small (I don’t even know if they still are around), and 4-ish “size 1” covers (thirsties and a blueberries). Which is way more than I “need” but have been collecting through 3 kids, lol. This time I’m going to cut a couple of my FSTs in half to use in the first two weeks because my workhorses and other fitteds still seem big for the tiny baby. I loooooove my newborn workhorses. Its basically a prefold that’s been shaped into a fitted. It makes the diapers a little more trim than a standard prefold, which helps keep the butt from looking bigger than the whole baby lol. I didn’t have them for #1 but I used them for a good 2ish months with #2. I’m going to cry when I’m ready to sell them.
After tiny baby, we usually switch to prefolds/FSTs until crawling age, when pockets become easier. My husband prefers prefolds and would prefer to do that the whole time...he says there’s no guesswork needed to tell if it’s wet, lol. But when they start to move, it’s just nice to cut out extra seconds during a diaper change.