Feeling completely overwhelmed — The Bump
3rd Trimester

Feeling completely overwhelmed

I am due nov 13th, this is my fourth. This was unplanned, but a blessing. I am feeling so completely overwhelmed and depressed. Financially, I’m in a hole. I can’t afford all I’m going to need to for the baby. I have a 1 year old that gets into everything, and it’s making me even more scared thinking how I am going to handle them both. I have two other daughters 12 and 9 that I know will help out, and I have a husband. I’m having a very hard time mentally, trying to get some things for the baby and instead of being excited I feel dread, fear, a disconnection. I can’t even enjoy any of this and it’s a shame because this little baby is a blessing from God. He’s going to be my long awaited son, I have Three daughters. I’ve been crying for the past few days, I feel dead inside. Like really depressed. I can’t talk my husband about this because he doesn’t understand what I am feeling I tried. I wish Jesus himself would come down and just tell me everything will be alright. I just want to cry all the time. 

Re: Feeling completely overwhelmed

  • Talk to your doctor. Antenatal depression is real. Part of the thing for me at my peak PPD/PPA was that even the littlest things seemed impossible and I couldn’t see solutions. Example: We don’t have screen doors on our house, nor do we have AC. We went through a heat wave and temperatures weren’t dropping enough at night to cool the house. With the doors open, it cools faster but all the bugs were coming in. Peak PPD, I would have just had a meltdown.

    End of the world. Just going to melt. Horrible mom, keeping my baby too hot. And on and on. With meds? I was myself: Oh, I’ll just buy a few more fans to suck the cool air in and some supplies to make temporary screen doors—all on preorder and pickup in store at Home Depot and Target. I can do it!

    It’s going to be hard. No doubt. But you can and will do it! <3
    Me: 34 DH: 38
    Married: June 2011
    TTC since Feb 2016
    BFP#1: 7/7/16 MMC: 8/16/16 
    BFP#2: 5/8/17 - CP
    BFP#3: 6/27/17 EDD: 3/10/18
  • I understand completely how you feel. I've got Irish twins too and they are definitely a hand full and a half. Have you talked with a counselor or your care provider about how you're feeling? I ask because I see mommy burn out all too often in my tribe of friends. Do you have a tribe to help you? Do you have a place where you can go and unwind and talk with other moms? MOPS International is a great place for this! It's how I find my tribe every time we move. (We're a military family.) I'm also wondering if you've considered hiring a postpartum doula? We are specifically trained to help you in your postpartum phase to learn to be this "new mom", as well as help you take care of practical things in your life like light housework and laundry, and just being another adult to have a conversation with. DoulaMatch can help you locate someone in your area. And remember, you CAN do this, maybe not alone, but you still can! Blessings to you and your new growing family! <3 
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