Weight gain

mcgeeva · August 2018

Lately I’ve been focusing on what is or is not acceptable for weight gain. This is my third and with my 1st and 2nd I gained 50-65 pounds. Lost all the weight after my first but stayed 40 pounds over after my second. I have asked my doctor if I have a number to stick to or if I should be concerned and they just tell me no. I am trying to be super conscious to avoid gaining too much this time and try to avoid any issues since I’m high risk. How is everyone doing with the weight gain? I’m also feeling super self conscious this time around. I want to enjoy this since this is my last. Maybe I’m just having a week so I’ll leave my vent here.

texas_t · August 2018

I gained more than that with my first so I've been crazy paranoid this time around. I asked my OB at my first appointment to refer me to a nutritionist, but they felt like that was jumping the gun. They said just calm down and as of yet, not one OB in the practice has mentioned my weight or weight gain. This time around, I've gained 13 pounds and with the last pregnancy at this point I had gained 23 pounds. So, no one seems worried and I seem to be doing better, so I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing. I feel ya, though!

mcgeeva · August 2018

Blah I’m only up 8 pounds which my husband said is much less than with my boys at this point but I’m so focused on its making me upset. Which makes no sense. I think knowing I hit the weight I gave birth at at my 21 week appointment Friday is making me feel a little anxious. What will I look like or be health wise If i gain much more? Also all those stupid sites says if your BMI is such and such not to gain more then 15-20 ish. And of course mine in over weight for my height and weight and all my friends have said with number three no matter what you do you will gain just as much.

snugglyduckling25 · August 2018

I gained ~50-60 lbs with my first, then again with the twins and I’m on track to gain the same this time around. I’m currently up 30lbs at 23 weeks. I started this pregnancy 15-20 lbs heavier than the other two, so I’m definitely super uncomfortable where I’m at and am looking forward to working this weight off. I saw my doctor last week and she wasn’t concerned at all with my weight gain and said it’s just what your body seems to do. I don’t have any advice, just know I’m with you. This is definitely my last pregnancy too and it’s probably been my most miserable between morning sickness, an SCH complicating things and the weight gain. I’ve never loved being pregnant, but this time I actually really dislike it. Good thing I know he’s worth it! Come on December!

mcgeeva · August 2018

Yes @sungglyduckling25! I’ve been in my room since 7 feeling sick as a dog. Worst pregnancy I have had. My boys were easy with no sickness. This shit won’t end and carbs are the only thing that sits well. I feel you I worked hard to get this one so I need to just enjoy.. between the sickness of course. Are you still having sch issues?

katy0990 · August 2018

I gained 38 lbs with DS, but I was also at my heaviest when I got pregnant. I worked really hard and over the course of 2 years. I lost the baby weight and an additional 25 lbs. So far, I have gained 20 lbs already, which I am really upset about. prior to getting pregnant, I was working out 3 to 4 days per week. I was restricted from working out during my first trimester because of some spotting I had and I just can’t seem to find the energy to get back into it. I really do not want to gain as much as I did with DS, so I need to figure something out!

snugglyduckling25 · August 2018

@mcgeeva I’m sorry you are still sick! Mine has pretty much gone away, but it was most definitely the worst of all 3 pregnancies. Or maybe it was trying to keep up with three school age kids while having morning sickness...I’ll never know. Either way it was not fun. The SCH is still hanging out, it’s stable and besides the few weeks after first finding it, has been very uneventful. My doctor is not concerned about it anymore, which is great, but I’m still sticking with all of the original restrictions.

mcgeeva · August 2018

That’s great it’s calmed down @snugglyduckling25 because I know how scary bleeding is when pregnant. I had a partial placenta aburption with my first which I’ll never forget so def get taking it easy. Keeping up with kids defintely makes this tough. I have two boys that start school this week and baseball twice a week each with my husband traveling the next month and a half. Going to be a rough two months.

@katy0990 that’s awesome how hard you worked. So I’m sure I can imagine your nerves wth putting it back on. We all want healthy babies number one but it’s still hard to handle and I am by no means eating carb free extra healthy meals or working out like I should. And now with my husband being gone that time is gone.

echo-charlietango · August 2018

I’m a FTM so I don’t have much experience here, but I’m going to share since you’re asking!

I started out at a healthy BMI (but a little too squishy according to my pants & a BodPod Composition), about 15lbs heavier than I liked.
So far I have gained 6lbs, I am currently 24 weeks and I don’t own a scale.

I might get weighed next week, curious to see what the scale says. It probably won’t show any large gains because I know I’m losing muscle mass

katy0990 · August 2018

@snugglyduckling25 I’m glad that they are not concerned about your SCH at this time, but I hope it resolves soon.

runrinserepeat · August 2018

I gained 55 lbs during my previous two pregnancies. I did lose it all both times, but it was miserable to do so.

I was so hopeful id do better this time, but I’m up about 20lbs at 25 weeks, and gaining quickly. For the last 10 weeks I’ve been comforting myself with the idea of, “if I gain 1lb/week to the end, I’ll still be okay”, but I’m worried it’s starting to come on faster than that.

At this point, I’m just trying to focus on staying as active as possible. It might not help my weight gain as much as I want, but at the very least, I should be able to start losing again quickly after the fact if I’m able to start running right away. I starting running about 2 weeks PP after DS (with my doctor’s blessing), and was able to run a half marathon when he was 5 months old. I’m going to be shooting for a June half marathon next year.

Jens_Hoes · August 2018

I gained 45 lbs the first time around, and worked out 4x a week through the first 6 months of my pregnancy. They said nothing to me at all about my weight.

This is time around I gained like 25 lbs by 20 weeks and they counseled me mostly because I had an 11 lb weight gain in 4 weeks which I don't understand. I'm trying to not focus on it too much (even though it's on my mind constantly) and remember that I was able to lose it all the first time around. I'm looking forward to having control of my body again lol

PensiveCrayon · August 2018

Like @snugglyduckling25, I’m a pregnancy gainer. Last pregnancy I gained around 50 and then lost all but the last 10 before getting KU again. Now I’m up 24ish pounds. My goal is to keep it to one pound per week of pregnancy from here, which would set me at five under where I was at the end of my last pregnancy. I’m weighing myself every day, which is something I didn’t do last time around, but which I do when I’m not KU (just because it keeps me on track).

I didn’t want to gain so much again, but it seems like my body just loves to pack on the pounds while it grows a human (aaaand also I sort of tend to overindulge all of the time. Maybe it’s more efficient at burning calories when I’m not pregnant, who knows?) Luckily my doctor is super chill and said he was totally fine with my weight gain from last appointment. I’m currently waiting on the results of my GD test. I messed it up trying to do things my way last time, and may have had undiagnosed GD. My kid came out XL.

katy0990 · August 2018

@Jens_Hoes I gained 9 lbs between my 16 and 20 week appointments. I am pretty upset about it. Although, I had dinner at my dad’s house the night before and really pigged our on homemade bacon Mac & cheese, peach pie, and zucchini cake, so I’m blaming that for some of it.

runrinserepeat · August 2018

Oh also, I read a lot about this and the concern about gaining too much seems to be that it correlates with larger babies (which can be unhealthy). Similarly, not gaining enough is correlated with smaller babies (also potentially unhealthy).

Even though I gained 55lbs both times, my kids were well within normal range (7lbs 2oz and 6lbs 8oz). So just because there is a “healthy weight gain” range they give you, I think sometimes your body just does what it needs to. I’d gained a little less this time at 20weeks, and they said baby was a little small at my a/s. And honestly since then, I don’t care as much about how much I’m gaining. Don’t get me wrong, it does still bother me to see those numbers go up, but I feel better knowing that it’s helping baby.

Also, cliche advice I know, but if you’re worried, TTYOB (talk to your OB). I mentioned it to my doctor early on, and she was like, “huh? You lost it all, your babies were healthy. I’m not worried”.

So yeah the logical part of me is all, “it doesn’t matter”. The vain part of me wants to pull an Angela-from-The-Office and be all skinny by the time I get back to work. But TV is not real life, at least not in this case, not for me.

katy0990 · August 2018

@runrinserepeat That makes a lot of sense. My LO was measuring a couple weeks ahead at my a/s, so maybe that’s why I’m gaining so much.

lexidawg · August 2018

I started the pregnancy overweight bu 63lbs from my highest weight ever, but 60lbs up from my lowest from losing weight. 3 years of infertility treatments and all the emotions that came along were not good for my weight loss. I have been so paranoid about getting back to my starting weight during this pregnancy that I weigh everyday. I am happy with my gain so far at 8lbs at almost 22 weeks. I want to keep the weight gain in the 20lb range, which is pretty healthy for my weight. My doc isn't concerned thus far. Weight is such a mindf**k.

hannelorre · August 2018

I'm also FTM. Had sort of constant low grade nausea for the first trimester + few weeks so the weight gain has been slow, but now that I'm in the second trimester, it seems to be more steady 0.5 to 1 lb per week gain. I'm trying not to focus on the numbers (scary when thinking about the non-pregnant times!).
Out of curiosity, weight gain seems to have some genetic/individual component to it. Does anyone know if their mom was a gainer/loser during pregnancy? My mom likes talking about how she was back at her pre pregnancy weight within a few weeks and I'm hoping it's the case for me too

hkom · August 2018

I think the biggest thing to remember here, especially along the lines of what @hannelorre mentioned, is that many of your body's reactions to pregnancy have little to do with anything else than that's just how your body reacts to pregnancy. With what I've been dealing with the past month+, sometimes there is nothing you've done to cause an issue, and there is nothing you can do to fix it, and that's ok. It is what it is. Obviously, there are exceptions, but if you're generally taking care of yourself and following your doctor's advise then I would really try not to worry so much.

But just because something was easy for someone else, like quickly getting back to your pre - pregnancy weight, doesn't mean it will be for everyone else, even if it's "genetic." I take every comment like that with a huge grain of salt. I'm reminded of a friend who recently commented that her pregnancy was so easy and she didn't gain much extra weight because she was an athlete. My head almost exploded. Myself and this "friend" (she's really not my friend anymore as she's proven time and again that she's self-centered and just completely unsympathetic to anything that doesn't directly affect her) played different sports and the same university and I've had a pretty tough pregnancy, even though I'm an "athlete" and have had very few physical issues both then and now.

Anyway, end rant. But try not to beat yourself up too much. I know gaining weight you don't want sucks (i haven't experienced that with this pregnancy, but I've been there before) but it really is a pretty trivial thing in the grand scheme.

*edited 1000 times because I suck at typing long things on my phone.

kadeephd · August 2018

@jens_hoes @kay0990 I gained 8.5 pounds between my 20 and 24 week appointment, and since then I think I'm up another 2 (and it's been four days...). I was gaining slowly in the beginning, but it really picked up around week 20. Now I feel totally out of control despite trying to eat well. I'm up 17 lb overall. I think I'm still in the target range right now, but I don't seem to be able to keep it to 1 lb per week at this point and I hate it. I've had mild disordered eating stuff in the past and am trying to keep my head on straight.

ETA I'm a first time mom so part of my paranoia is not knowing how my body will react post-pregnancy. It would be awesome to be one of those moms who just sheds pounds effortlessly through breastfeeding, but I've never had an easy time losing weight in the past. I was very happy with my weight prior to getting pregnant and am worried I'll never get back there again.

Trying to keep what @hkom said in mind and be kind to myself.

hkom · August 2018

@kadeephd Anyone with a history of disordered eating is obviously in another league with this and it may not be so simple for you/them. Like you said, try to be kind to yourself

PensiveCrayon · August 2018

@kadeephd You bring up a good point. Last pregnancy I was a lot more worried about my weight gain because I had no idea whether I would be able to BF and if so, whether the pounds would just “fall off” like some people experience. Adding to the stress is the fact that my mom became obese after she had my sister and me, and I’ve always been determined not to follow after her in that respect. But this time around I have the experience of knowing that for me the weight does come off fairly easily.

That said @hkom you are totally right! As long as our weight gain healthy (so, not GD or pre-e related) it really is a very minor concern in the grand scheme of things!

katy0990 · August 2018

@kadeephd Yes, good point! everyone sheds the weight from bfing. I lost a lot while bfing, but some of it still hung around until I got into a workout routine because while it burns calories, bfing also requires you to be sedentary for 30-50 minutes out of every 3 hours or so.

mcgeeva · August 2018

Thanks all for the comments. I don’t weigh myself at home, no eating disorders here but I’m 5,9 my mother is a head shorter than me as well as her whole entires Italian family so they are all redic tiny. So there is no comparing there. All I ever hear is stay away from the carbs! Pashhhh. Two I don’t agree with you have larger babies based on weight gain. With gaining 50-65 I had a 5pd12 once baby and a 7 pounder. This is more just how I feel in general now being 6.5 years olde heaving kids and the weight just hanging on my body. Breastfeeding did not make the weight fall off last time. My body has officially changed being insulin resistant. I was doing spin and lifting weights 5 days a week never lost a pound or size around on 2 months and was told to do more cardio which I just don’t have the time. So felt lost when it came to weight before my ivf and once I stated treatments unless I was walking I was not doing anything crazy during stims and transfer because I didn’t want to chance his pregnancy after two misscariages last year. So with that said I’m trying to ge good to myself and enjoy that ice cream and not freak out I messed up. Shoot we can throw back wine so I need something. But I really appreciate people understanding and sharing if my feelings.

Katzalia · August 2018

Weight stuff is so complicated. Last time I started in the healthy weight range but higher than I’d like. I lost about 10 lbs the first trimester, then gained it back plus 20 more (30 lb weight gain total). I lost about 15-20 lbs easily postpartum.

This time, I started off heavier, close to my delivery weight with my first. I lost 30 lbs in the first trimester due to MS plus some medical issues. I stopped losing weight at about week 14 weeks, and as of last Thursday (22 weeks) had gained 7 lbs from my lowest weight this pregnancy. My OB is pleased that I’ve started gaining, but now I feel a little overwhelmed with how quickly the gain is happening — partly because I am more sedentary the past week or two because of RLP with any walking. I would like to keep to a pound a week for the remainder, but I think my body is going to do whatever it wants and I’ll just have to roll with it.

katy0990 · August 2018

@mcgeeva we are all doing the best we can to care for our LOs! You absolutely are entitled to some ice cream!

Jens_Hoes · August 2018

@kadeephd I have some glimmers of disordered eating as well and have been up and down with my weight a ton over the years.
I was able to lose pretty much all the weight I gained over 9 months postpartum. But my shape was definitely not the same. Loose and different lol

CecilB93 · August 2018

So before getting into this, keep in mind I was diagnosed with GD at 7 weeks and had to drastically alter my diet...this pregnancy I've lost 14 lbs. So far I've gained back maybe 3-4 of those lbs. However, doctor says baby is growing right on track, not too big or too small. A little part of me is still worried that I haven't gained much, but since baby is okay and neither of my doctors are concerned, I keep reminding myself that it's okay. I was overweight to begin with, so I definitely had some weight to spare, it's just very different from my pregnancy with DS.

In my first pregnancy I gained 35-40 lbs. After baby was born I held onto all that weight, and then some. I was not a lucky person who dropped weight while BFing. I wasn't a lucky person who dropped weight after stopping BFing either. I have zero expectations of just losing weight after this kid without trying. My main goal is to not hit 200 lbs, currently I'm 169-170.

AGK2015 · August 2018

So I gained 70 lbs my first pregnancy, starting from a pretty average BMI and without the whole eating for two mentality. That's pretty standard for women on both sides of my family; we blow up like balloons and deliver superchunks (mine was 9lbs 14oz). Even still, it was a huge mindfuck. Ultimately, even though it was an otherwise perfectly healthy pregnancy, it was one more way that I had lost control over my body, and it was definitely a contributing factor to my prenatal depression. Watching the number on the scale creep up and up, past every milestone that you hope you'll never hit, is HARD.

So this pregnancy, I don't have a scale at home. I'm trying to keep my focus on not going hogwild at the buffet, but my body is going to do what my body is going to do, and it means nothing in terms of how healthy baby or I will be. I'll find out what the official damage is at my next appointment, but it seems like so far I've gained slower but gotten much bigger much faster, though the past week or so I've felt a bit more balloony. Strongly encourage you, if you're able, to put the scale away for now and/or talk to your doctor and ask them to only tell you your weight if there's a concern. You're all doing a great job, and your bodies are doing amazing things. Whether you end up gaining 7 or 70 doesn't change that.

tunnel · August 2018

I gained 40lbs my first pregnancy. Started this pregnancy 13lbs heavier but was hoping to gain less and be the same weight at delivery. But I've already gained 22lbs at 22 weeks, which only leaves me 5lbs which isn't really possible with 17+ weeks of baby growing to go. So new goal is to not gain more than 40lbs, which leaves me with 18lbs max. I've been eating out a lot lately, so I'm hopeful that stopping that, watching my food intake, and getting out for some more walks will help level off the weight gain.

This thread has helped me feel better because I know that I am not alone.

I also did not lose weight BFing, so I know there will be a lot of work ahead to lose the weight and get into my best shape (especially since this is likely my last baby)

Activebaby · August 2018

My goal is for my weight to be less than it was when I delivered ds2. That gives me 1 lb/week to go. I was either 150 or 152 at delivery with ds2. I think I was 148 with ds1. I struggled to get the weight off after ds2. I don’t drop weigh while breastfeeding(goal 1 year), which is really hard for me mentally. This is one reason my fitness is so important to me. I don’t want to feel weak and overweight. As long as I’m strong I feel
like I can handle the extra weight better mentally. I eat whenever I want to though. I make okay decisions about food choice, but I feel like if I’m pregnant or breast feeding and my body tells me Im hungry, then I should eat. Does that make any sense??

mcgeeva · August 2018

All makes sense

Not withholding cravings lol. I think regardless the older we get the harder it is to get the weight off. Something to deal with later.I never dieted while bfding or I wouldn't produce enough milk which is definitely more important to me.

ab_canada · August 2018

I've definitely almost hit my "desired" weight gain for this pregnancy. And the other day The Bump app decided to make me feel better by saying "you're likely to gain another 11lbs from this point until the end of pregnancy"

But I don't *feel* like I've gained that much fat, you know? My face looks the same, I think..

maureenmce · August 2018

For those who have had disordered eating in the past, (or anyone else who is a struggling), if it helps, you can ask to be turned away from the scale while being weighed and tell your doctor to only tell you about your weight if it becomes an important issue to discuss. (And it wouldn't hurt to mention the disordered eating or struggles you're having with weight to remind your doctor to be especially sensitive.) I had disordered eating through high school and in my 20's, but luckily pregnancy weight gain is not much of a trigger for whatever reason. Mostly because I just, as others have said, think my body is going to do what it's going to do. I gained 40 pounds when pregnant with my daughter, held on to 10 of those, and almost certainly would have gained 40 this time around if not for my reflux/vomiting issues. That slowed my weight gain a bit, so I'm up about 14 at this point. I'm overweight and I am prone to having postpartum thyroid issues that make weight loss very difficult, so I'm trying to eat as healthily as I can while maintaining a reflux friendly diet, but in the end, my body is gonna do what it does when pregnant. I'm hoping for another 6 pound gain and cap things at 20, but I'm thinking it'll probably be more like another 10-11 pounds which would make 25 total, but I've decided I'm fine with it (or whatever happens.)

Hugs to everyone having a hard time with weight issues - it can be so tough to deal with. ❤️

clbness · August 2018

I gained 39 lbs with my last and I feel like I gained a majority of it in the last month or 2. I had insane swelling the last month, so I think I was retaining a lot of water. From weeks 6-20 this time around, I had some pretty bad nausea and food aversions, so I think I've only gained 5-10. I'm sure, now that I've got my appetite back, I'll start gaining more regularly. After I had my first, I lost the weight (not ALL of it, but I was down to 5 over pre-pregnancy) pretty quickly. It may have been a combo of breastfeeding and light exercise. But, I started on PPD/PPA meds at 7 months PP and I gained 10-15 lbs from that...and kept it on until I got pregnant again. I'm not going to put too much pressure on myself, but I'd like to get back down to that 5 lbs over pre-pregnancy weight again.

omnommer · August 2018

I think what others said about not worrying too much about the numbers as long as it's an otherwise healthy pregnancy is important to think about. I was asking my nutritionist these questions and she gained over the recommended amount too when she was pregnant! She basically described it as, if you're putting good food into your body (aka nutritious things - enough protein, healthy fats, good carbs) and you are getting exercise and/or walking daily, then your baby likely won't have the issues they worry about when the mom gains too much. Typically that will come from overindulging the sweets and bad carbs (the things that don't provide as much nutrition). (Of course, we can't always be 100% perfect, but having a pretty decent track record realllly helps.)

I've gained about 17 pounds as of this morning... but I was with my college roomie this weekend and we definitely had a splurge weekend, so I think 2-3 pounds is water weight from overdoing the carbs from what I normally do. By the end of the week, I'm guessing that it'll go down a little. I know my body goes up a few pounds when I overeat chips and things, but usually recovers fairly quickly.

ab_canada · August 2018

omnommer said:

I was asking my nutritionist these questions and she gained over the recommended amount too when she was pregnant! She basically described it as, if you're putting good food into your body (aka nutritious things - enough protein, healthy fats, good carbs) and you are getting exercise and/or walking daily, then your baby likely won't have the issues they worry about when the mom gains too much. Typically that will come from overindulging the sweets and bad carbs (the things that don't provide as much nutrition).

I agree. And the bottom line is even if you do gain weight because of cravings or just feeling generally more hungry, pregnancy is only temporary and so the weight gain should be as well. A good attitude would be to try to eat healthy during pregnancy but not to worry too much if you know you are doing the right things (ie not a pint of ice cream each day - that's not good in any situation!). Then, once you have a chance to focus again on getting back on track, it will come off... with time and effort, of course, but it will.

temmetime · August 2018

I didn't know what kind of responses were going to be here when I clicked on the thread - weight is a totally mindf*ck, nasty betch and extremely sensitive topic. You ladies are all so damn wonderful, and I'm just in awe of your kindness and support of each other. Remember to offer that same kindness to yourself!

I gained 70+ with my first, which really screwed with my mind. I lost 30+ by the time I left the hospital, but had a horrible time losing while BFing. I started this pregnancy 20 lbs more than I started last pregnancy. I typically stay in a 20 lb range, so last time at the low end and this time at the high end. I've been working by butt off to not eat extras and I haven't been as active as last time. I am not swelling yet like I did with DS, and am currently sitting at my starting weight (lost about 10, gained it back).
While I give myself a little credit for trying as hard as I am, the reason for less weight gain so far is that this is a total different baby. I was constantly thirsty and really hung onto the water weight with DS, and this time I am just not. I assume this LO won't be as obsessed with bath time, but every person, pregnancy and child is so different. Give yourself some grace! (Also telling this to myself)

hannelorre · August 2018

I'm so glad I finally stopped lurking. Everyone's been so thoughtful, especially on the topics that can be difficult. Group hug?

mcgeeva · August 2018

@temmetime so true I could of been Chewed for this post! But everyone has been super sweet.

hkom · August 2018

mcgeeva said:

@temmetime so true I could of been Chewed for this post! But everyone has been super sweet

*stuck in the box*

At this point I think we are far enough along that unless you are a true drive-by you won't get flamed for creating one-offs. Still gonna torment the knotties though

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