3rd Trimester Check-In | Week of 7/30

Holls214 · August 2018

Lurking- just a heads up about the cervical check... I had mine checked a couple times. I was dialated to a 2 at like 34 weeks and 80% effaced with the head down. I bleed a lot after one of the checks, so don’t stress if there is blood and bright red blood. I was super stressed about it because the doctor didn’t warn me. Good luck to you ladies!!! Everyone is getting so close.

Irisheyes81 · August 2018

@hottietoddy I completely agree with you about leave. I was reading what you said and nodding!! I love the study of human behavior and personality disorders are real things that start at birth! Bonding and attachment are lifelong struggles. Parents have to go back to work days after having a baby because they can’t afford not to. That leaves a heartbreaking situations for families. Not to be dramatic or political (I’m 40 weeks pregnant tomorrow so I’ll say what I want) the heartbreak at the boarder separating families is actually very similar to a single mother who is a waitress and has to leave her 2 week old to go to work. A lot of people don’t have options!! Ugh. Anyway, I agree with you. The long term damage is much more expensive than short term options. Congrats on your induction date!! You’re so close.

2MomsHoping · August 2018

@irisheyes81 your right no matter what pregnant women get commented on waaaay to much. I guess infertility taught me not to ask about having kids. Pregnancy has taught me not to talk about to pregnant women and also not to comment about name choices!

@hottietoddy you are doing great. You have had it a lot harder this pregnancy than me. I never really know my limits though I enjoy keeping busy a little too much. DW and I agree that my job just may not be compatible with our new life and I will probably start looking for something else, hopefully closer to home. Not necessarily a career change but something similar in a new place where I only do that job instead of where I have established myself here as a bit of a she can take care of it all type. Regarding the waiting room we won’t have anyone holding up shop in there, just the thought of someone waiting on me stresses me out. There will be no social media announcements of the birth until baby is in his or her going home outfit and headed out the door to avoid hospital visits. Immediate family and besties will get called/texted. Besties plan to come in the first two weeks we are home. The only visitors we are allowing in the hospital and only after we have transferred to the post-partum room are my parents, my MIL, BIL & his longtime girlfriend (which is actually a nice surprise he’s going to be in Chicago for the month of august doing filming he normally lives in LA), and my work friend who threw me the shower. We would also allow my FIL (but he’s in Mexico), my SIL (but she will be in Georgia, long drama ridden story), and our niece (but she is with her dad for his 3 weeks of summer time and he won’t let her come see the new baby…this crushes her, she’s so excited. He’s a giant d-bag, DW tried to nicely call and convince him and he had the audacity to say if its that important that she see the baby we should schedule a c-section during SIL’s parenting time then hung up on her. Some people are out of this world. And you know who suffers? My niece. I honestly don’t care if my niece sees the baby on day 1 or three weeks from then but she does. Ugh it just makes me so mad. Are you excited or nervous to have your induction date?

@lablover78 I agree sooooo close! But why are the days getting longer? These last two weeks of pregnancy put all the prior 2WWs to shame!

@holls214 and @lablover78 thanks for the tip on the spotting I did have a tiny bit last night so it was nice to see your comments.

@irisheyes81 word on the separation stuff be it at birth or at a border. I have waaaay to much to say on this so it’s best not to get me started. But all of it heartbreaking and when I do complain about my unpaid leave I feel like an a-hole because I have it so so so much better than so many. I just don’t understand why things are the way they are why are so many benefits tied to the company you work for, and company benefits can be so volatile even from year to year. Though a handful of states have started making paid leave requirements so it’s a start…a small start that helps only some but it is something. Sigh.

gfgrump · August 2018

@hottietoddy oh man. No AC in that hot. Holy shit, that sounds awful. Sorry things are are all happening at once, but hopefully that means things will chill out once the baby is here. DH works for himself too, and we're often waiting for people to pay. I know how annoying that is. Only once has it gone to a weird, messed up situation, but it's pretty regularly a few weeks, which is freaking annoying.

@Irisheyes81 yeah, I've also heard of the walking epidural, which my understanding is that it's just less meds to make you a little more functional. My hospital also has nitrous oxide, which is just supposed to make contractions a little easier to take and they use it a lot in Europe. I was considering starting with that. And I just find all the comments on pregnancy and pregnancy bodies annoying. I don't want people constantly telling me I look great (which I'm pretty sure is a lie), or making any comments at all.

@2MomsHoping And yeah, I have lots of friends who have had people ask if the baby was due soon and they're like, nope, 2 months. Like, why is it okay to comment on women's bodies at all? It's just annoying.

AFM, ended up having an eventful night where I tripped on the sidewalk, scraped up my hands, my knee, ripped my pants and fell on my belly. I knew it wasn't a super hard fall on the belly bc my knee and my hands took the brunt, but it did hit the ground, and of course better safe than sorry. DH freaked out. And then I started to freak out. So we called Ob-triage, and they had us come in. They monitored me for 4 hours, did an US to check fluid, a few blood tests, and checked my cervix twice, once at the beginning and then once at the end, bc I was having a lot of contractions. Everything was fine. Baby's HB was good, movement good, no blood or fluid. Got home around 3am. But I now know what you mean about cervix check not being a fun experience. I think I was fisted by the Dr. Is that how it is when you are actually in labor or once the cervix drops is it easier for them to feel it and measure? Bc it took her a while. Or was it that it was a resident with small fingers who had trouble getting to it?

Anyway, crazy, that you can be walking along, and you take your eyes off the sidewalk for a second, and boom, flat on your face. I could feel myself falling in slow motion but just couldn't regain my balance. The nurses and Dr. were great and I felt like they were being really careful. Plus, going to back to ob-triage could have been really triggering since I went a lot in my last pregnancy but it was actually fine. The worst part was just lying on a really uncomfortable bed for 4 hours, which really messed with my back. I am very thankful that everything is fine and that's what's important.

@lablover78 she said my cervix was "barely open" and when we asked what that means, she said about a 1/2 cm, which I guess is common if you've had a pregnancy before and she said people can even walk around with 2cm dilated for a month or so.

Anyway, spending today trying to just stay chill and hopefully walk with a little more grace and balance.

[Deleted User] · August 2018

@gfgrump. So glad you went in to get checked out, and everything's okay! Ouch!!!

2MomsHoping · August 2018

@gfgrump that was an eventful evening for sure! Though I’m sure being all scraped up isn’t fun I’m glad you were able to break your fall before too much pressure landed on the belly. I’m super impressed that you too the stress of the hospital visit in stride. Hopefully no more sidewalks will be jumping up at you anytime soon!

halfanewt · August 2018

@gfgrump glad you’re okay! Hope you can take it easy this weekend, too!

Irisheyes81 · August 2018

@gfgrump you poor thing!! Ugh that’s awful!

mbradfo2 · August 2018

Cervical checks are no joke at any time I think

lablover78 · August 2018

@gfgrump so glad everything is ok and you seem to be taking it all in stride! Glad you were not triggered

I think getting fisted is an accurate description for how my check felt too- good times.

laurad75 · August 2018

@gfgrump Ugh, I'm sorry that happened to you and glad everything is okay.

I think my cervical check is on Tuesday and I'm terrified.

[Deleted User] · August 2018

@Irisheyes81. TODAY IS BABY DAY!!!!!!! ❤
Thinking of you, and sending you love, and courage (((hugs))) You got this mama, and think - how very soon you'll be holding your little precious in your arms... :blush:

[Deleted User] · August 2018

I was told in my hypnobirthing class we can decline or ask for fewer checks... like there may be times when it's a good idea (1. Upon admission / triage, 2. At some point as we are hopefully through transistion), but that the value of early cervical checks is.... debatable? I mean, whatever it is, you can hang out there for a while, or things can progress quickly - who knows! I guess too if you're being enduced, because a cervix that has started to progress on it's own may yield a smoother induction, too, but if they are enducing you then it's not as if they are NOT going to induce you based on a cervical check.

I just hate to see everyone enduring these kind of exams for largely academic purposes, especially if you don't really feel comfortable with them. :/ You can pretty much always decline / delay, as far as I was aware.

mayflower513 · August 2018

Lurking from T1...

my OB office doesn’t do a single cervix check until 39 weeks (unless there’s an issue before that). They don’t want to put anyone into labor. They do do an ultrasound at about 38 weeks (maybe it’s 36) to check things though.

2MomsHoping · August 2018

@irisheyes81 thought of you right away this morning! I can’t belive today is the day. Getting to this day has seems oh so long but also like a blink of the eye. Best wishes for a safe and smooth delivery. Hugs (and jazz hands for excitement!)

@BusinessWife I heard the same thing about the cervical checks. But when they did check me when I was sick just to make sure things were closed up (I guess sometimes the stress on the body can cause early labor signs) it didn’t hurt so at my appointment I just kinda went with it and told her not to tell me the results so I don’t obsess and make it into something it’s not. One other thing I looked up is that is you are at least 1cm dialated sometimes the ob will do a membrane sweep without even telling you which is more painful than just a check and tends to have more bleeding spotting related to it. This ticks me off because a membrane sweep and a cervical check are totally different things and should be consented seperately. Honestly at this point I’m not against a membrane sweep but I want to make sure I (or anyone else getting one) knows what they are in for. I also put limited cervical checks on my birth plan and to NOT tell me my dialation numbers. People move at such different paces in labor and I think no matter what they tell me I would be dissapintment i wasn’t farther along and don’t want that to mess with my head.

hottietoddy · August 2018

Good luck @Irisheyes81 thinking of you....hope it all goes smoothly!

@gfgrump so glad you are okay, that is something that would happen to me....I've been worried about falling for several months now. Great job not freaking out in the hospital

@2MomsHoping thank you for the kind words and it's nice to hear you are limiting visitors similar to us, I think it is very common these days. 100% that is how I feel, like why are you there waiting on me!? I'll call you when there is a baby to be seen if and when I feel like it. You are so close-thinking of you! I think I'm a mixture of relieved and nervous about being induced.

mbradfo2 · August 2018

@2MomsHoping
I don't think they should do a membrame sweep without telling you at least!

@hottietoddy
I felt alot of relief too when I knew I was going to actually have the baby that day (or the next). It's like the stress of a PAIF pregnancy is going to be behind you and you're going to meet the baby! Even though it wasn't ideal circumstances for me, it was still a huge relief. And my nurse reminded me during my induction that it was OK to say I had enough, not to feel pressured to continue attempting to induce and progress.

3rd Trimester Check-In | Week of 7/30

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