Ever feel alone and a bit depressed?

Sherimadoodles · April 2018

I am currently in my second trimester with my second child. This pregnancy is different in terms of emotions. I feel so alone and misunderstood. The first pregnancy, everyone was so helpful and kind. Women give birth all the time!!!! Why do I feel like this? My husband is not being very supportive. He keeps telling me that I am being mean, but I just cant help it! I try and stuff down my feelings but them I get depressed from all the supressed feelings.

kiki75 · April 2018

Talk to your doctor. This sounds like it’s outside the realm of regular pregnancy emotions. And it doesn’t have to be that way. Your doctor can help. Do it now before things get harder.

natalie115 · April 2018

Subsequent pregnancies can definitely be different from the first. There can be less excitement from the people around you because it's not the "first" anymore. Partners (and everyone really) can be less helpful because it's not the "first". I would absolutely talk to your dr about it though. He/she may have some ideas to help or may be able to point you in the direction of a support group/therapist.

wildtot · April 2018

Please reach out to your ob and consider a therapist. Pregnancy related depression can happen before delivery and you should seek help. People (even ourselves) put on unrealistic expectations because they have already gone through it before. Each pregnancy is different.

taylornewmother · April 2018

Everyone elses reply doesn't seem to be so supportive. Let me be a little more positive because I completely understand where your coming from. Its hard especially when we are not getting support from our families or significant others. Sometimes I feel depressed and other days I have more hope. So it just depends. Also our bodies are going through several hormonal changes even if it is your second baby. We have to remember to gentle with ourselves and kind to ourselves. We are dealing with a lot especially when we are pregnant. Be blessed.

meggyme · April 2018

taylornewmother said:

Everyone elses reply doesn't seem to be so supportive. Let me be a little more positive because I completely understand where your coming from. Its hard especially when we are not getting support from our families or significant others. Sometimes I feel depressed and other days I have more hope. So it just depends. Also our bodies are going through several hormonal changes even if it is your second baby. We have to remember to gentle with ourselves and kind to ourselves. We are dealing with a lot especially when we are pregnant. Be blessed.

No one here was negative and I don't see how it is unsupportive to recommend she talk to her doctor. Depression is a medical condition and should be treated with a doctor's supervision. I'm sure that this being her second baby she is well aware of the hormonal changes.

izza2 · April 2018

taylornewmother said:

Everyone elses reply doesn't seem to be so supportive. Let me be a little more positive because I completely understand where your coming from. Its hard especially when we are not getting support from our families or significant others. Sometimes I feel depressed and other days I have more hope. So it just depends. Also our bodies are going through several hormonal changes even if it is your second baby. We have to remember to gentle with ourselves and kind to ourselves. We are dealing with a lot especially when we are pregnant. Be blessed.

Supportive = telling someone who may be developing/suffering from depression to seek help from a licensed professional.

Unsupportive = telling someone who may be developing/suffering from depression that the above isn't supportive, and that it's all okay because "some days are better than others" and "hormones".

Depression is a real, legitimate health condition. It can develop during pregnancy and get worse during the postpartum period. Telling someone that they should just blame it on hormones and look forward to the good days is NOT helpful.

wildtot · April 2018

taylornewmother said:

Everyone elses reply doesn't seem to be so supportive. Let me be a little more positive because I completely understand where your coming from. Its hard especially when we are not getting support from our families or significant others. Sometimes I feel depressed and other days I have more hope. So it just depends. Also our bodies are going through several hormonal changes even if it is your second baby. We have to remember to gentle with ourselves and kind to ourselves. We are dealing with a lot especially when we are pregnant. Be blessed.

I think everyone else has been very supportive. It’s already hard enough to admit something is not right it’s harder to be told it’s all nothing and just hormonal that will go away. Everyone has good and bad days but it’s those bad days that if left unspoken or treated that can really break someone.
OP as someone who has dealt with depression for some time before pregnancy and postpartum speaking up and seeking help was the greatest gift to myself. Take care of yourself and give yourself some grace.

stillcozy · April 2018

taylornewmother said:

Everyone elses reply doesn't seem to be so supportive. Let me be a little more positive because I completely understand where your coming from. Its hard especially when we are not getting support from our families or significant others. Sometimes I feel depressed and other days I have more hope. So it just depends. Also our bodies are going through several hormonal changes even if it is your second baby. We have to remember to gentle with ourselves and kind to ourselves. We are dealing with a lot especially when we are pregnant. Be blessed.

seriously?! if your idea of support is just sunshine and rainbows than you are highly misguided. As someone who has struggled with pregnancy depression and anxiety. I needed people to tell me to talk to someone. If someone blew smoke up my butt telling me oh you are fine... I would not have been fine at all in the long run. So please step back and recognize all the commenters are giving advice and super positive support!

Kaylab3388 · May 2018

My husband is not emotionally supportive. Even when I tell him I am uncomfortable physically and emotionally, he'll just look at me with a blank stare or tell me he shouldn't be the source of my happiness or hes not the cause for my issues when I already know that and have been telling him calmly all day of what I need. I feel very alone. I just need a hug or two and for someone to give me a pep talk sometimes. But i guess that's too much to ask for. So i definitely feel you and am sorry you're going through that too. It will be ok.

knottie866e0d8b3fb1b17a · July 2018

Incompletely understand. I am 27 weeks with my second, but first for my husband and I and it’s been a struggle. Feeling misunderstood and just a burden at times because I don’t want to stay up late and hang out, or go out at night .... he says he is trying to do what he can to make it easier for me but is always making me feel otherwise. I get the alone feeling completely... it’s good to know others feel it too. Sleep deprivation doesn’t help either!!! Lol

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