Leave job for fertility treatments?

smittyswifey · May 2018

So I’m just curious if any of you either are or have been in the same boat as me. I’ve had three IUIs, *tw* one was successful but lost it at 7 weeks, and two failed. We are going to try one more round of IUI before moving on to IVF. I may have to leave my job because of all the time off I’ll need for appointments. It’s already been a struggle to get to all the appointments I’ve had to go to so far, and I know IVF can be much more time consuming. Leaving my job is only going to make this journey even more of a struggle, so I’m just curious if anyone else left their job? How did you make it work?

kristimh80 · May 2018

@smittyswifey Pre-IVF cycle I also wondered this same thing, but after I started, it was fine. I just made sure to make all my appointments 1st thing in the morning so didn't have to stress and worry about it as much. Until you're almost at egg retrieval, you won't know exaclty what day retrieval will be since it will depend on how you are responding to everything. But, if you have some vacation time, it maybe a good time to take it near the 2nd half of the process. Work was very good with my schedule during it all. I would definetely let them know if you can of everything so they can always prepare if needed. Best of luck to you!!!

adirat · May 2018

Do you qualify for FMLA? https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/benefits-leave/fmla

scully127 · May 2018

The good good article by Resolve on this recently. https://goo.gl/pJRJWD

cashewchicken · May 2018

@smittyswifey I was worried about the amount of time I had take off work prior to embarking on the IVF journey but I found that IVF was much easier than IUI. My first RE clinic was with a large hospital group and they performed all kinds of fertility treatments, from TI to IVF, not to mention surgeries and other gynecological services. Because of that, getting an appointment with them was difficult, especially with IUI requiring you to make an appointment last minute (after confirmed LH surge, AF arrival, etc. etc.). When I moved to IVF, I chose a small clinic (everything was OOP for me anyway) that only performed IVF that was close to my workplace. The clinic also operated from 6:30 in the morning so there was plenty of time to schedule an appointment before I had to get to work. Another nice thing was that with IVF, your cycle is controlled by all kinds of medicine so there were fewer surprises. Yes, I had to take the day off on the day of retrieval but other than that, all my appointments were done first thing in the morning and I did not have to sneak off in the middle of the day like I did with IUI.

J1006 · May 2018

I was worried about this too. I work at a school and need a substitute every time I miss. I was just up from with my bosses. It was the best decision I made. They have been super supportive and flexible. As others have said, I always try and get early appointments. My office opens at 7 and there have been times when I wasn’t even late to work or if I was, not that late. For my IUIs I would just take a half day for the actual IUI. For IVF, I only had to take days off for egg retrieval and transfer. I’ve tried to just give them as much notice as possible when it comes to appointments. There was only one day where I had to schedule it day of, but they didn’t seem to mind. Personally, I can’t imagine not working during this. Especially during the waiting periods. FMLA might be something to look into as mentioned above.

mcgeeva · May 2018

Having done both iui and ivf it was the same amount of missed time for me. The only extra time I took was the day of retrieval. It also really depends on your practice. Mine does all monitoring from 7-7:30 ish and I always scheduled daily at 7 if possible. I did that every single day for 12 days straight and made it on time to work an hour away. So if you can get your apts planned out and as early as possible you will be good to go. Shoot schedule and if you need to reschedule at least you have the earlier of apts. But like others said work so good for a distraction and incoming money due to the cost of ivf. Need something to keep you busy since it’s a 3 month total process to do just one cycle of ivf if it works and doesn’t get delayed. Good luck!

roisis · May 2018

@smittyswifey I'm very sorry for your loss

. This is a great point to bring up - and I'm not surprised that so many people have also considered it. Everyone's job is different and it can be stressful organising things around it - and naturally we want to reduce as much stress as possible around this time. However, as others have said, working is a very good distraction too - there's a lot of waiting around in this treatment. Bear in mind that ivf can take quite some time. I made the initial mistake of assuming is would take ~1 month but that was very wrong! Depending on tests and fresh/frozen transfers - or multiple transfers, you could possibly be doing this for quite some time. Of course I really hope that if you do move to ivf all goes smoothly and it works first time - which does happen for people. I guess my point is, you just don't know at this stage, so be careful making any big decisions. Also I'd check what kind of maternity leave your job offers - if you're not working there when you get pregnant you can't avail of that.
At the end of the day it is your choice, if you feel you need this time off for your own sake and would be able to go back to work afterwards, then that's for you. Just consider all options and possible outcomes. GL with your journey

smittyswifey · May 2018

adirat said:

Do you qualify for FMLA? https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/benefits-leave/fmla

Unfortunately I don’t qualify for FMLA since I’m the only hired employee. I think that’s what has me so stressed, that whenever I call off there’s no one to cover for me.

I truly appreciate everyone’s responses! It’s a lot to consider and I’m hopeful the next IUI is successful so I don’t have to worry about this!

ndz2018 · May 2018

@smittyswife I agree with the other girls.. they usually have early morning monitoring hours at most clinics to accommodate work schedules . I have to be in my office at 730am every day... our morning monitoring hours are from 6am-730am so it worked out for me, and the actual scan literally takes about 5 min. I also agree with @roisis IVF never goes as planned it can take a few months.. we started our journey with the RE Oct 27th, did our ER in late Dec, then i had to have a surgery and now two canceled FET later here we are waiting till my June cycle starts to do our FET. Point being I would wait to see how it all goes before making that sort of decision.

megmac2010 · May 2018

I actually found that most days I was early for work after my monitoring appointments. My clinic is first come, first served for blood work and ultrasounds in the morning. They open at 7:30, so I always attempted to be there by 7:15 so I was the first in and first out. I'd be at my computer, working, by 8:15 at the latest.

I took off the day of the retrieval and the day of the transfer. If you had a really physically demanding job, you might need an extra day after the retrieval, but if you work a desk job, you should be able to go back to work the next day. My clinic doesn't do bedrest after the transfer, but if your doctor does, you would also have to plan for that time off.

I think, personally, without work to distract me, I'd drive myself nuts during the IVF process. But, whatever you choose to do, I'm sure it will be the right decision for you. Good luck!!!!

sunny_side · May 2018

@smittyswifey I feel you girl! I left my job after a year of trying naturally and then started seeing a RE. For me, I was the only person in my salesterritory and worked remotely. The pressure to sell and travel requires made it a no brained for me to leave. I did have a void at first because I was obsessed with my job and felt addicted to the stress and being number 1. I took up some hobbies and even started a very small business so I can work when I feel like it. Many women love thier jobs and are making a difference in the lives of others. My old job just didn’t fulfill me in that way. For me, I’ve had a great experience and view it as a wonderful opportunity to grow as a person pursue things that enrich my life and bring me joy in a time when all I want is a child. I give major props to all women who are able to find balance in thier lives during ivf whether they are working or not. Good luck!

Drove2u · May 2018

I agree with most of the girls. I’ve gone through six iuis and one Ivf. And about to do it again. I barely took any days off. I went first thing in the morning and have a two hour commute to work via train to Nyc. I pretty much made my usual train and if not I may have been 15 minutes late. I took off one day for ER and day of transfer since I had to travel 45 minutes for those. I also told my boss what I was going through which helped things when ER is so up in the air. I’m definetly glad I didn’t quit since it kept me distracted. Are you planning on being a stay at home?

smittyswifey · May 2018

@Drove2u Yes, eventually if we are successful the plan is for me to stay home until my kids start school. With that said, it’s tough for me to justify leaving a job now since it’s my salary that is going into savings for my time off, and being used for fertility treatments. My biggest issue with my job is I work M-F 7am-5pm so there’s so little time left during the week for me to schedule appointments. I’m the only hired employee so there’s nobody to cover for me when I need time off. I think I’m just stressed that if I don’t make the decision to leave on my own, they might make that decision for me. Like I need something else to be stressed out about through this whole process!!!

Drove2u · May 2018

@smittyswifey I hear you! I'm not sure what you do and how crucial it is for you to be on time. But is it possible for you to tell your boss and let him/her know that you may be a little late some days and then you can stay a little later? Also for me, my clinic does baselines, ovary checks etc on weekends so sometimes my appts would fall on sat and sundays and then most of the week for me would be ok.

sunny_side · May 2018

My gif wouldn’t post...LOL

tinjp78 · May 2018

Is this the gif you were trying to post @sunny_side ?

To you Spammer.... Go Away!!!

sunny_side · May 2018

I wish i could have posted it! It was a different but the message was the same! LOL

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