I have a question for stm how did your SO react to your early pregnancy symptoms like nausea and fatigue when my dh found out i was pregnant he was all like no rest I'll do it all which I never let him do and it lasted about a week now he's getting more and more frustrated that I'm not doing as much as I used to I'm trying to explain that sometime just cooking him dinner and doing the dishes is to much and he says I just need to push through it which just makes me upset hes usually so supportive but he's not understanding this I feel like may be Im over reacting or is there a way to get him to understand? Maybe I just need to vent
@donnawicks I’m sorry your husband doesn’t understand. I think maybe because my husband stalks these boards with me, he gets it. Would your husband be open to checking this place out to see what we’re all going through, so he sees how miserable this is?
@maureenmce I’m in the same boat. I had a difficult delivery and am terrified of this next delivery. As a psychologist and also someone with this on my own to-do list, I think one of the best ways to find a good therapist for this kind of thing is to ask your OB for a recommendation. There usually aren’t a ton of people who do perinatal therapy, and OBs usually know who is good in your community.
The other thing I would think about is that anxiety makes us want to avoid thinking about or talking about the stressful memories. When I start thinking of my L&D experience, I freeze up, my breathing gets shallow, my muscles clench (including all those that are needed to push out a baby), and I strongly want to think about *anything else* rather than that experience. A good therapist for this kind of trauma/anxiety issue is going to help you start to approach those memories (rather than avoid) and to use the information to help you regain control and develop a plan to approach it differently this time.
@Katzalia Thanks, I will talk to my OB at my next appointment. I luckily don't have a ton of trauma related to the birth (there was one scary moment, but I think I'm okay overall dealing with going through it again) but I am very, very anxious about the entire newborn phase due to my previous PPA and PPD and very low milk supply (which was also related to my thyroid going crazy.) It was kind of like everything that could go wrong did go wrong and I was very afraid and stressed out most of the time (panic attacks and everything) and felt very alone.
So, I guess I'm realizing that, as excited and grateful as I am to be pregnant, I am genuinely terrified of the first 3 months or so and I should probably talk to someone about that so I'm not setting myself up for another bad experience. I hope you are able to find some peace and coping mechanisms for birth. I imagine that it would be very tough to have the physical reactions you're describing during labor. Anyway, I wish good luck and good plans this time around for us both!
My NT scan is scheduled for June 15th, and by LMP that puts me at 14 weeks but by ultrasound measurements I’ll be 13w3d. I don’t have another ultrasound between now and then and I’m a little worried because I know sometimes babies catch up after measuring behind, and the NT scan has to be done by 13w6d. It was scheduled that late because my OB didn’t have earlier availability. Would you guys try to see if they can figure something out or just trust that the dating measurements won’t change?
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
@coco2787 typically the dating scan is supposed to be pretty accurate. Do you know exactly when you ovulated? If not I'd trust the doctors scan. But it doesn't hurt to call and see if there's been any cancellations, or ask them to put you on a wait list.
@coco2787 I would call and discuss your concerns with your doctor’s office and see what they think. If anything, they may be able to write you a script for an ultrasound through the maternal fetal med group at your hospital.
@CecilB93 I was using OPKs and I only had one day where I got a positive and I got my BFP at 9DPO so I'm pretty certain of when I ovulated, at most I could be off by a day. My due date by ovulation would be the same as my due date by LMP. I have an appointment with the nurse on Tuesday, I'll see what she thinks.
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
@coco2787 Asking the nurse is a great bet. I’d be hesitant to rely on the scan alone with that much information and be tempted to move the apt up.
My first LO measured ahead on his first OB scan (IVF, so we knew it was off). This one measured behind, and we are certain of the ovulation window here as well. Both were more than 72hrs, but just less than 1 week off in either direction.
Re: Weekly Questions w/o 5.6
The other thing I would think about is that anxiety makes us want to avoid thinking about or talking about the stressful memories. When I start thinking of my L&D experience, I freeze up, my breathing gets shallow, my muscles clench (including all those that are needed to push out a baby), and I strongly want to think about *anything else* rather than that experience. A good therapist for this kind of trauma/anxiety issue is going to help you start to approach those memories (rather than avoid) and to use the information to help you regain control and develop a plan to approach it differently this time.
So, I guess I'm realizing that, as excited and grateful as I am to be pregnant, I am genuinely terrified of the first 3 months or so and I should probably talk to someone about that so I'm not setting myself up for another bad experience. I hope you are able to find some peace and coping mechanisms for birth. I imagine that it would be very tough to have the physical reactions you're describing during labor. Anyway, I wish good luck and good plans this time around for us both!
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
DS2 due 12/12/18
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
My first LO measured ahead on his first OB scan (IVF, so we knew it was off). This one measured behind, and we are certain of the ovulation window here as well. Both were more than 72hrs, but just less than 1 week off in either direction.